Ch1. Do You Wanna Build a Snowman

[Castle Year 2]:

-Beckett-

Do you wanna build a snowman?

Come, let's go and play!

I never see you anymore. Come out the door. It's like you've gone away.

We used to be best buddies and now we're not. I wish you would tell me why.

Do you wanna build a snowman?

It doesn't have to be a snowman.

Castle waited for Beckett's response outside her door of her apartment but still there was no sound. He knew she was in there. It was early and they still had not caught a case but even if they had, at this point he wasn't sure if she would allow him to ride along anymore.

It had been less than a week when Castle uncovered the truth about her mother's murder. He remembered strictly the words she had said to him, almost as if she were standing in front of him now, "Castle, you touch my mom's case and you and I are done." And yet he hadn't been able to let it go and looked into it anyways. It had worked out for him, but mainly for her. He had hoped that now that she knew the truth about what had happened, that she had gotten at least some of the answers she needed.

Instead Beckett had only frozen him out.

The only reason she would talk to him was because she had to and the only reason he was still riding with her was because Montgomery and the mayor had allowed it.

Still, it being the first snow of the season, Castle was willing to give anything a try.

"Do you wanna build a snowman," he asked once more.

"Go away, Castle," Beckett replied after finally getting annoyed.

Castle knew Beckett would come out now, not after that response and so he took his leave.


[Castle Year 3]:

Do you wanna build a snowman?

Or ride our bikes around the halls?

I think some company is overdue. I've started talking to the pictures on the walls.

It gets a little lonely. All these empty rooms. Just watching the hours tick by.

Another year. Another first snow. And once again, Castle was left out in the cold as he stood at the front door of his partner's apartment.

He wasn't sure what it was he had done to be frozen out this time. The boys wouldn't tell him, Lanie wouldn't tell him, and neither would Montgomery. All he had to go on was his mother and daughter's advice which was still cryptic at best. And though Castle had apologized to Beckett for something he didn't know he was apologizing for, there was still that rift between them.

All he wanted right now, much like he had around the same time last year, was to build a snowman with his best friend.

"Do you wanna build a snowman," Castle asked.

He hoped for a response. Anything but there was nothing.


[Castle Year 4]:

-Beckett-

Please I know you're in there.

People are asking where you've been.

They say "have courage" and I'm trying to.

I'm right out here for you. Just let me in.

We only have each other. It's just you and me. What are we gonna do?

Do you wanna build a snowman?

Four years of being partners at the 12th and of those four, three had ended with some sort of fiasco, this being the third. Early on at the start of this year Beckett had gotten shot. He didn't blame her for freezing her out but he somehow got the feeling that there was more to it and he wasn't sure what it was. As usual no one was saying anything. Part of him wondered if it had anything to do with what he had said to her as she lay dying on the ground, the part about saying "I love you". He had confessed his words to his mother and she found it to be a complete cop out since he had waited till she was nearly dead to admit how he felt.

Now he wasn't about to let another minute go by. It was the first snowfall of the year. Inches beyond inches covered all of New York. It was his third attempt but he was still willing to try.

"Do you wanna build a snowman," he asked. He had lost track of how many times he had said those words to her while she rummaged around the other side.

Just as he turned and was about to give up, he heard the door open. He saw as Beckett stood. Dressed and ready to go.

"You have got to stop singing that song," Beckett said to him.

"It's not a song," Castle replied.

"Trust me, it's a song." Beckett wasn't too sure where she had heard it but she added, "Somewhere."

Castle smiled, pleased at her attire, "So I take it you're ready to go?"

"This doesn't mean I'm still over what happened," Beckett said.

Castle simply shook his head to indicate he was fine with it even though he had no clue as to what it was she was referring to. It could have been any number of things.

"I'm only doing this," Beckett added, "Because every year you come to my door with that song and you never seem to go away no matter how many times I try to ignore you."

"It's not a song," Castle interrupted.

"It's a song," Beckett said to him. "So I'm hoping," Beckett added, "That by saying yes to your snow day, you'll finally leave me alone."

"I'll take it," Castle said as he handed the cup of coffee to her, something had done on every snow day.

Castle watched as the small smile came to Beckett's lips but was gone just as quickly. He smirked, knowing that he had done his job.

"What did you have in mind anyways," Beckett asked as she locked up behind her and followed Castle.

"How do you feel about sleigh rides?" he asked.