Author's Note: This fic is inspired by Nikki Gil's song of the same title. She's a Filipino singer. I was fixated on this song way before but a plot bunny appeared when I listened to it again a few weeks ago. Incidentally, I found another song (a Korean song, 7989 by Girls' Generation) which fits the plot of the story so now I listen to it while editing my fic. :)
New year is around the corner so happy new year to all! :)
Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar. ATLA belongs to Mike and Brian.
Hear My Heart
Chapter 1: Katara
Katara walked aimlessly around the corridors of the Fire Palace. Even though she travelled a lot because of Aang and though she was staying at the Fire Nation for almost a month now with the Avatar, Sokka, and Toph, she still got hopelessly lost inside the enormous palace. Of course it would be difficult to remember every twist and turn of the palace because of the uniformity of the design; at least the trees in the woods and the barren icy lands of the South Pole looked different once in a while.
She sighed for the tenth time. When was she going to find her own room? She surmised she was wandering for an hour and a half. They had just finished dinner and she decided to walk around the palace before going to bed – bad idea, even Sokka said so.
"Katara, remember last time when I found you pacing in the east wing of the palace? Maybe you should just accompany us outside. You know, enjoy the cool breeze?" Sokka said.
"Sokka, that won't happen again! I remember now where the library is. It's just the Fire Palace really confuses me. Like it has something against me," she said lamely. At this, Zuko snorted.
"Okay, but I'm telling you Katara. That evening walk of yours is a bad idea. Bad Idea!" Sokka said in his pompous older brother voice.
"I won't get lost," Katara said stubbornly. Zuko once again snorted.
And now, Katara wanted to bang her head on the wall. Repeatedly. At least she remembered where the library was and she definitely knew that she was nowhere near it. She guessed that she was somewhere near the throne room.
She turned another corner to test her guess but it was not the throne room she found. It was another stupid room in another stupid corridor surrounded by another stupid red flag with the Fire Nation insignia on it.
She definitely needed help but she could not find another person in that area, not even a guard. She made a mental note to tell Aang to tell Zuko about this. Zuko would probably laugh at her getting lost rather than get angry that the area had no guards patrolling it.
Feeling frustrated, Katara slumped against the wall to rest her aching feet. She hoped someone would pass by the corridor. She needed anyone to find her – a servant, a guard, even Sokka. But the last person she would want to find her was Zuko.
Her heart skipped a beat when she thought of Zuko finding her instead of Sokka. She would rather welcome Sokka's gloating laugh than Zuko's smirk. Not that she hated the Fire Lord, but on the contrary. Her feelings for the Fire Lord were slowly creeping up on her. After all that has happened – the betrayal, the forgiveness, and the friendship, she did not know that these would suddenly develop into... that feeling.
She smiled wryly. She could not even say it in her head what she truly felt for Zuko. In fact, she was avoiding it altogether. After realizing what he meant to her, she grew afraid for herself. She knew she would end up getting hurt if she continued with this... this thing. She was sure Zuko only saw her as a friend and nothing else. And besides, if he reciprocated her feelings (a fat chance of that, she sadly thought), they could never be together. They were worlds apart – figuratively and geographically. They were both needed by their people. And they would end up marrying someone who would be advantageous to their own respective nations.
In short, there was no way this was ever going to work.
This spurred Katara to evade Zuko in whatever circumstances. Of course, she couldn't avoid him during dinner which Iroh declared that all of them should eat together as a family despite their personal agendas. But everything else, walks to the garden, flying with Appa, and the like, she would not go if Zuko was present. Most of all, she did not want to be alone with him.
But as well-thought out plans go, this one failed. As Katara slumped further down the wall, she remembered how her brilliant plan failed in every aspect.
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Last week, when Aang suggested that they should have a camping trip – "just like the good 'ol days" as Toph described, Katara fervently declined knowing Zuko was invited. Toph's eyebrows rose unusually higher. Sokka groaned, saying Katara was such a kill joy. Aang gave her a hurt puppy dog face. And Zuko frowned.
She looked at her friends' faces guiltily and avoided Zuko's gaze in the process. Zuko asked her why and she mumbled that she was not feeling well. To her immense surprise, Zuko stepped up to her and felt her forehead to check if she had a fever.
She blushed and felt the heat come up to her face. Zuko eyed her warily and told her that she was indeed warmer than usual. At this pronunciation, Sokka's eyes widened, Aang frowned and tilted his head, and Toph's eyebrows rose a little higher.
"I meant her body temperature's higher than the usual," Zuko snapped at their reactions. "Keep your minds out of the gutter. I haven't been touching her, okay?"
Katara looked flustered. She forced a smile on her face and said, "You know what, I think it's just the weather that's making me feel unwell. But I think I can go on the camping trip. The change of scenery might make me well."
Zuko stared at her and asked, "Are you sure?"
"Mm hm," she managed to squeak.
As much as she hated to admit it, she enjoyed the camping trip. They finally enjoyed camping without looking over their shoulders for the enemies. They hiked in the woods, bathed in the lake, pitched their tents, had a picnic, and gathered around a campfire.
When night fell, she was staring at the star- filled sky when Zuko sat beside her. Her heart beat faster when she felt his warmth next to her. She wanted to tell Zuko that she would rather be alone but she could not find it in her heart to tell him that. She knew deep inside that she wanted to be alone with him, even for that one night. As Aang, Sokka, and Toph went to their respective tents, Katara and Zuko stayed up later.
They talked and laughed until Katara felt light headed. She felt sleepy but she was very happy. She enjoyed talking to Zuko. It felt completely right to be with him. She felt a twinge of sadness when she realized that she really wanted to be with him for the rest of her life but knew she could not.
She was lightly dozing off when Zuko was at the middle of his story about the time he kicked Azula's derriere during a sparring session when he was twelve. She teetered forward and Zuko wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her from falling face down on the ground. She was so sleepy that all she remembered was Zuko mumbling something and she was nodding to whatever he said. By the time she woke up, she found herself beside Toph inside their tent. She did not know how Zuko put her inside the tent when Toph was already inside. And Toph hated getting woken up at an ungodly hour.
She smiled at the memory of their night together and felt kind of guilty for sleeping while he was still talking. She blushed at the thought that he carried her to her and Toph's tent and tried to remember what the feeling was, being in his arms. He even said something to her but he said it so softly, she could not make out his words. She sighed heavily.
Toph finally woke up and her unblinking eyes were directed at the tent's canvas ceiling. "Hey Sugar Queen, how's your evening with Prince Charming?" she smirked.
Katara sat up suddenly from her makeshift bed and stared at Toph with widened eyes. She gaped and struggled for words. Toph rose up from her sleeping bag and smirked at her direction.
"Prince Charming woke me up during my peaceful slumber. You fell asleep on him so he brought you here in the tent. You know how I am when someone sneaks up on me so I bended the ground on instinct... and I think he fell," Toph said.
"Oh Toph, you didn't!" Katara exclaimed.
"Well yeah... But you know it's kind of your fault. If you guys didn't stay up late, then you wouldn't be sleeping on him. Then he wouldn't have woken me up. Then I wouldn't have the ground toss him aside. Then he wouldn't have fallen with you on top of him. So there. It wasn't really my fault," Toph said guilelessly.
"Oh no, I don't know how I'm going to face him. That was really embarrassing," Katara said. She buried her face in her hands.
"What did you two do anyway?" Toph's smirk was creeping back on her face.
"Nothing! We just talked...." Katara trailed off while smiling dreamily. She was glad that Toph was blind and could not see her face.
"Whatever. Just so you know, I think his back hurts because of the fall. Why don't you go see him?" Toph suggested.
"I think that you should go with me and apologize!" Katara snapped, her eyes flashing.
Toph raised her hands up. "Whoa, Sugar Queen. I already apologized to Prince Charming and besides, he did sneak up on me. I just acted on instinct."
Katara grumbled and crawled her way out of the tent. Before she lifted the tent flap, she turned to Toph, "And stop calling him Prince Charming. He's definitely not my Prince Charming."
Katara thought she heard Toph say under her breath, "Yeah, but he's definitely your Mr. Right."
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Katara remembered Sokka saying: "If you're lost, stay put and someone will find you eventually. That way, you wouldn't get lost even further." She snorted. Normally, she wouldn't follow his advice to the ends of the world even if he meant well. Some of his advices are hare-brained although if you comb through them, they were actually practical. She was suddenly reminded of the time she followed Sokka's advice when she was eight, wherein she doused herself with fish broth to catch a penguin faster. It worked – although the scent of the fish broth was hard to take off and the penguins followed her everywhere she went. She protested to Sokka but instead he smugly said, "You said you wanted to catch penguins faster, right? It worked, didn't it?"
Thankfully, this was not one of his hare-brained advices.
She waited for what she thought was an hour until she regretted her decision to follow Sokka's advice. Katara grumbled and stood up in a huff. She started walking through the long corridor when she heard distant footsteps. She followed where the footsteps were coming from, guessing it was Aang or Sokka.
Katara was about to round a corner when she bumped suddenly into someone. She winced from the impact.
"I found you."
She looked up and saw golden eyes. She gaped.
"Call off the search, I found her," Zuko called to the guards behind him, ignoring Katara's reaction. The guards nodded and shuffled away.
Zuko then turned to her and said, "Nice evening walk?" He smirked.
Katara groaned inwardly. "Shut up, Zuko."
She pushed past him and walked away from him. It had to be Zuko to find her! Surely, the fates were playing with her. Her heart beat faster when it dawned on her – she and Zuko were alone. She stopped walking and turned to him. He kept a straight face although she found that he had a trace of a smirk.
"So, um... Walk me to my rooms?" She asked meekly. "Please?"
Zuko's face broke into a laugh. Katara hardly heard Zuko laugh so she found herself smiling. He looked even more handsome when he was not so serious.
Zuko went to her and offered her an arm. "But there's a price, milady. You have to obey my every whim from now on," he said in his mock-stern voice.
"I'll take a chance," she answered smiling. "You wouldn't want your favorite Waterbender to get lost again, would you?"
"No, I wouldn't," he said quietly while looking her straight in the eyes.
Katara stared back at him with his quiet response. Did he care about her? She mentally told herself that she should not read anything into it. She smiled wistfully at him and took his offered arm.
Zuko glanced at her but said nothing. Together, they walked in silence and exchanged "Good night" when they arrived at Katara's door.
Katara went inside her room and clutched her chest. She walked slowly towards her bed and collapsed on it. She grabbed a pillow and hugged it while her tears began to flow.
"One more day and we're leaving for good. Then I won't have to see Zuko again. I can finally stop this fantasy," she told herself.
Instead of reassuring herself, she broke down completely. She realized she wanted her fantasy to be real. But she was not in a fairy tale her mother told her when she was little. She was in a world where people had to be divided by their elements, where practicality exceeds love, and where opposites do not attract.
One more day and the fantasy would be over.
