A/N hello people this is my first attempt to write a fanfic, I don't know if it's good enough or it's downright bad, but you can read if you want. This just a kaka/naru family fic, I don't have any idea of pairings yet. But if this story turns out good, then maybe I'll consider it. And I must warn you my english is not so good, especially the grammar.. oh, how I hate grammar, but don't be afraid I tried my very best though…. After all english is not my mother tongue…. Here goes nothing, so enjoy…

Ow disclaimer of course, y know Masashi Kishimoto owns 'em all..

The boy who lost

When you think there's so much pressure on your life, then you have to multiplied it a thousand times to make it par with his. When you think that life is both harsh and hard to live by, then you have to rough it up to make it head to head with his. When you think you want to get rid of people who love you with all they have, I'd say think again. Twice, thrice even. You don't know what you have, until you lost them.

There was a boy, a prodigy of his age, and his village. He had never seen his mother, for she had died in delivering him. Still his father loved him to the fullest; he did not blame his son for the death of his wife, because his son is part of her too. The boy continued to grow; he was small compared to his peers in the academy. But true to his nickname, he was the youngest to graduate from the academy. Because of this, he started to underestimate others, and he was developing a superiority complex.

Once he thought of a peaceful life, no one will order him around, he can live independently, make his own decisions without thinking of others, no people whispering unnecessary comments, no scrutinizing gaze. In short, the nonexistence of idiots. But those fateful months, has changed everything. Indeed he realized it, but it all in vain. He was too late. Thus he is, a boy who has nothing to live, to thrive, and to look forward to. Most of all he has lost his hope. He has nothing left, but an empty shell full of sorrow and despair.

It all started with his father failed mission. Being the leader of the mission he has full responsibilities of all casualties occur, and this time his casualties is no joking matter. Aside from multiple deaths, a war also declared. The villagers and many of his colleagues blamed him, except his son, and his teacher who also his best friend. Men can only endure so much, and the proud father was at his limit. He committed suicide, for its better than to be accused of something that you think and know was right.

By the dawn, the prodigy sensed something amiss, instantly alert he went to his father room, only to be greeted by the sight of blood covered wooden floor, a middle aged man body kneeling with his hands griped a handle of his inactive chakra blade, with a hollow abdomen ,and some nasty part of his bowel could be seen. The boy then looked up, and saw a very familiar long grey hair illuminated by the glow of a candle on the table behind the man, it was the hair that he used to hold when he was perched on the man's broad shoulder, it was the hair that he used to looked up to, It was the hair that he used to tie when the man let him. It was the hair of his father. As a child he was expected to scream, to cry, to throw up, and to run immediately, but he was different. He approached the body calmly and he stepped on a blood soaked paper, he read it, there it written,

I'm sorry my son.

Like a switch, he started to cry his heart out, only to say 'otou-san…' over and over again. The boy was kneeling in a pool of blood in front of his father with his hands supporting his upper body, his tears mixed with his father's blood; his long sleeved grey shirt and hands were soaked in blood. His mask was soaked in tears, hands covered blood started pulling his hair in desperation, and soon some part of his hair was deep red. Then a sorrowful scream of a child resonating through the compound.

Then the deaths of his two teammates came, his best friend who gave him his left eye before he died, and a girl who died at the same day with his sensei. The girl died first, she died in his hands, and he held her until she closed her eyes in an endless sleep, never to wake up again.

His sensei death followed after the girl, his sensei was the leader of the village at that time, and he had to sacrifice himself to safe the village. The boy held a newborn baby and followed his sensei, with much struggle both manage to get close to their target. He ordered the boy to get as far as he can from him. The boy reluctantly agreed to this, but he made a promise with the man, his sensei must come back. Smiling softly at the boy, the man ruffled the grey mop, saying,

'I'll definitely come back'

Both parties knew that was a total lie, but at least it provided a little comfort. For the man he knew his only student was still a child at heart after all the deaths he encountered and still want some sort of comfort from adult especially him. As for the boy, he knew that the man would never break his promise and so he will clung to that promise. In the end, his sensei died as a great hero, and the truth hit the boy like being struck by lightning, he realized from the beginning of the deaths parade he was destined alone.

Until he met a certain someone, who reminded him of all he had lost, and gave him a purpose again. Although the certain someone was only a tiny human, barely a day old, still covered in blood. When the baby started to voice his own protest in an earsplitting scream, the boy was shocked. Eyes wide, irregular breathing, body frozen. People around him desperately calling him to the real world, but he can't hear them, he was too far for them to reach. He was being flooded by his memories; memories that he had locked up securely in his subconscious, memories that suddenly unlocked, and swallow him whole in a storm that has no origin. He tried to lock it once and for all, but to no avail. He was overwhelmed by it, and therefore he succumbed, and let himself being taken by it.

Sooo… guys what do you think? Meh..? Average..? do I need to continue? god, i'm sweating here... some reviews wouldn't hurt ya know, and will be much appreciated… and thank you for reading this story...