Finding Each Other Again
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.
I'd like to thank Miki Mouse in Blue Jeans for betaing this. Particularly all the help to make Carlisle sound like the scientist we know he is. (And if you haven't read her "Faith and Love" yet, you should definitely do so. )
I know a lot of Carseme fans like to think that Carlisle and Esme never have martial problems like this because, "vampires never fall out of love." But personally, I believe any couple can start fighting too much from stress or ignore each other under the right circumstances. And one of my favorite stories are established couples making up or reconnecting after problems.
Carlisle finished his shift at the Ithaca hospital and checked the sky again. It wasn't 6:00 in the morning yet, so sun hadn't risen. He should have enough time to drive to Cornell. Once he was on the campus, he should be all set, as much of it was shaded. It wasn't that sunny in November, anyway. He was lucky that Cornell was so desperate for lecturers that they were willing to hire him after the semester had already started. After failing his family, Carlisle felt the need to work as much as possible. He needed to help some people. Ithaca wouldn't allow him to help patients twenty – four hours a day, but Carlisle could use some of his extra time to help students at the university.
Carlisle climbed into his Mercedes and drove as fast as he could under the circumstances. He loved driving fast as much as his children, but he didn't want to injure any of the humans that were on their way to work as well.
Soon enough, he arrived at the university. He picked up the pile of medical journals he'd stashed in his car and headed for the office Cornell had for all the temporary lecturers. Carlisle didn't actually have office hours at this time, but it was still possible a student coming looking for him. The more times he made himself available to students, the more students he'd be able to help. In the meantime, he would enjoy reading the new articles.
OOOOOOOOOOOO
"…And that's how two carbon molecules can be the same but still different," Carlisle commented as he finished an Organic chemistry lecture later that afternoon. He taught two sections of introductory Biology and Chemistry as well, but Organic chem. was the most enjoyable, as far as Carlisle was concerned. Most of these students planned on being doctors, after all. He was extremely happy to help them do so. (It didn't make up for failing his family, but it helped.)
The students looked back at him, some of them nodding, while others looked as if they were still trying to grasp the information. "Don't worry," Carlisle promised. "We'll discuss this more in our next session."
They all began picking up their materials and headed out the door. He could hear them talking about their other classes, their plans for the weekend, and their current boyfriends or girlfriends. One of the students who sat in the second row came forward with her eyes sparkling. Her name was Desiree Sherwood. She one of students who seemed to grasp the material already. "Dr. Cullen, can you explain more about Chirality and isomers? This is exciting!"
Carlisle smiled. He'd be going over more about this subject in class soon, but there was no harm in discussing it more with Desiree now. "Well there is this drug that was used back in the 1950s. Thalidomide. It had two isomers, and caused some problems. Actually it damaged unborn babies."
Desiree nodded eagerly. "Really? But why was it given to pregnant women if it caused that kind of problems?"
"Well, Thalidomide was given to pregnant mothers to help with morning sickness. And it did." Carlisle had forgotten how much he enjoyed talking about science with someone rather than just lecturing to people. Edward used to enjoy talking about science with him, too. But Carlisle had failed Edward, so he'd left him and the rest of their family. Maybe he could help this young woman instead. "But because of the two isomers, it caused birth defects on the babies, too."
"And it was really the same molecule?" Desiree continued, fascinated. Carlisle finished picking up all of his materials and left the class room. She followed him out the door and they continued their conversation.
"Yes," Carlisle replied cheerfully. "They were just in different positions. Come back to my office if you have time. I'll draw you some diagrams." He couldn't remember the last time he was so…happy. Carlisle hadn't been anywhere close to happy in a couple of months.
Desiree nodded. "Absolutely, Dr. Cullen!"
OOOOOOOOOOOO
"…And so Thalidomide has 13 Carbon atoms which look like this," he drew a diagram. "And ten Hydrogen atoms which are attached like this," he added them to the diagram. "And then there is two Nitrogen atoms, and four Oxygen atoms."
Desiree leaned over the picture, trying to get a closer look. Carlisle loved spending time with someone who enjoyed discussing these things. And then, with the isomers, they look like this instead." He drew another diagram. "See, it's a mirror image."
Desiree nodded eagerly, and placed her hand on his shoulder as she did so. "Fascinating!" Carlisle would have loved to continue, but when she put her hand on his shoulder, it set off warning bells in his head. It was very probable this young woman was infatuated with him. Many were, after all. Ordinarily he didn't spend a lot of time with young females, because he didn't want to encourage them. But Carlisle had enjoyed speaking and helping her so much, he'd ignored his own rules today.
"Desiree, I believe it's time for you to go now," he said as gently as he could. He carefully removed her hand from his shoulder. "I need to go home now."
The young woman nodded. "All right. I'll see you soon, Dr. Cullen." She left the room, a little too slowly for Carlisle's comfort. She was definitely infatuated with him. He'd have to be careful how he interacted with her from now on.
For now, Carlisle was going home. He normally only arrived home briefly to change clothes these days. Most of his children weren't even home, after all. Because he'd failed them. Spending time at home was too painful and depressing. It reminded Carlisle how he'd failed them. But Desiree had reminded Carlisle of someone else. Someone who spent almost all her time at the house. Someone Carlisle had ignored for weeks in his quest to save all his patients and students. Someone Carlisle used to discuss things with for hours sometimes. Not science of course. But art. Particularly art history. They'd both had a passion for the subject, after all.
Esme.
XXXXXXXXXXXXX
OOOOOOOOOO
Esme looked at her design plans for the third time that day. The stair railing should be real iron, definitely, she thought writing that down. Perhaps she'd go to the supply store tomorrow to buy some more materials. She needed more shingles for the outside, anyway. And maybe one more beam in the back of the sitting room, she thought as she sketched it in. Yes, that was right.
It was around 3:30 PM, the perfect time to put in the new Dutch door in the back. The time when all the kids used to get out of school, Esme added to herself before she could stop herself. She shook her head firmly as she picked up the tools she needed. All of her children were gone. Thinking about them only brought pain. That's why Esme tried to focus all of her attention on restoring this large Dutch Colonial house. At least design was something she could do, considering motherhood wasn't an option right now. Jasper was the only one of the children still living with them, and he came home so rarely, Esme wasn't even sure he still did.
Esme picked up the door firmly. Thinking about these things all the time served no purpose. She was going to install this door. Then she grabbed a hinge, a screw, and a screwdriver.
OOOOOOOOOO
Esme had only one more screw to put in when she heard the front door open. It was probably either Carlisle or Jasper, considering they both arrived home occasionally to change their clothes. She didn't even look up. She needed to concentrate on the finishing the door. As Esme put the screwdriver down, she smelled Carlisle come up behind her. "Looks pretty good, Sweetheart."
Esme smiled. It was nice of him to say so. "Thank you. Do you need to change your clothes again?"
Carlisle paused for a minute, like he was trying to collect his thoughts. "Yes. But I came home earlier today, because I thought we could…do something together. I'll get one of the art books from my library and we could…talk. Like we used to." His eyes stared right into hers.
Esme stared back at him in shock. She couldn't believe he was suggesting they spend time together. The two of them had been…avoiding each other ever since the children left. She supposed they believed it was easier to ignore each other than face the fact that their whole family had fallen apart.
Carlisle sighed. "I know. It's easier for you to focus on restoring the house. Just like it's easier for me to focus on the hospital and the university. But Esme, we haven't lost our whole family. We still have each other. I know I've been ignoring you, and I'm sorry. But…come back to me, Sweetheart. Please." His eyes looked right into her soul, as they often did. She had forgotten how comforting that was.
Esme looked at the floor. Carlisle was right. She'd been ignoring him, and she shouldn't do that. Not when she loved him as much as she did. "You're right, Carlisle. I'm sorry."
"It doesn't matter now," he replied, taking her hands into his. "Let's look at this together." He picked up a copy of The Works of Leonardo da Vinci, an old favorite of theirs. Carlisle's favorite of da Vinci's work was The Last Supper. Esme preferred the Mona Lisa.
They sat down close together and began flipping through it. Carlisle stopped at a page showing a copy of Mona Lisa. "I love the way the landscape is such a part of the painting, even though the woman is the focal point," Esme commented.
Carlisle nodded. "The lighting on her is nice."
"I love her hands. See how your eye goes right from her face to her hands? That's done really well."
Carlisle nodded, but he looked down at Esme's hands. "Your hands are nicer."
Esme looked down at her own hands for a second and giggled. Then she took his hands and held them up to her face. "You have perfect hands."
He gave her his special smile and then returned his attention to the painting in the book.
OOOOOOOOOO
Carlisle and Esme spent about half an hour discussing the painting. They reconnected. "I miss the children, but I should never have left my grief shut you out, Carlisle."
Carlisle nodded. "I thought I needed to help others, because I couldn't help our children. I still do. But we can help each other, too."
Esme nodded. "Why was that so hard to realize? The children have left before, and we never ignored each other like this."
Carlisle shrugged. "They never left us all at the same time before."
Esme nodded. "Yes. That was the problem this time. But as much as I love and miss being their mother, I love being your wife, too. I'm sorry I haven't been acting like it." She kissed him on the cheek.
"I was just as guilty, Sweetheart." Carlisle kissed her on the cheek, too. Then he took a deep breath. "You smell so good."
Esme put her nose to his neck and sniffed him. "So do you." They shared a long, arousing kiss.
But eventually Carlisle pushed away. "Unfortunately, there really isn't time for that. I still have to go to the hospital tonight. But I could come home between my shifts tomorrow morning. I have about two hours."
"I'll remember that," Esme promised, as he got up and left for the hospital. Finding Carlisle again through art was wonderful, but finding him intimately again would be great, too.
Esme smiled to herself. She still needed to focus on the house to deal with her grief over the children, but she had something (or someone) to look forward to as well. Carlisle and Esme had found each other. Again.
I welcome comments and/or questions for this story if you would like to review. However, if you wish to discuss the science portion of this chapter, I suggest you talk to Miki. I got all the information from her, and she knows a lot more than I do.
