Walk Away

One year. One whole fucking year. That's how long Dean Winchester had Lisa and Ben in his life. There were six months of pure bliss. He moved in and got a job—a legitimate one—and really bonded with Ben. The kid might as well have been his own because that was how Dean viewed him. But when Dean had been targeted by several Djinn and Sam returned to save his ass, Dean was forced to leave Lisa and Ben for their safety. He kept in contact with Lisa over the phone and resumed his job as a hunter.

Then, after a few months of hunting with Sam and the Campbells, Dean had been transformed into a vampire and sent on a mission inside their lair to see what he could discover about their alpha. Before he went in, Dean had returned to Lisa in the middle of the night, but the smell of hers and Ben's blood had been too overpowering and he was forced to leave.

Finally, she formally broke up with him and began dating someone else. Dean had gotten the news from Ben. He had tried to get over her, he really had, but it was no use. He was insanely, inexplicably in love with Lisa. Several more months passed, and Ben called Dean again. A group of demons had come for Lisa and Ben and had killed Lisa's boyfriend. During the rescue attempt, Lisa had been seriously injured, and Dean and Sam had rushed her to the hospital. Dean pleaded with Castiel to heal her, his prayer was granted, and, at Dean's request, all memory of Dean and anyone associated with him had been wiped clean from her mind and replaced with the memory of a car crash. Dean had been lingering at the door when Lisa woke up, and when she saw him he introduced himself as the guy who had hit her, apologized and walked away.

Dean felt empty inside now, like a piece of him—an important piece—had been ripped away. He wandered the halls of the hospital, trying to lose himself in the maze-like building. He really, really loved Lisa. More than he had ever loved anyone. And he let her go.

It was eating him up inside, creating feelings that he didn't even know he could feel, or even that he wanted to feel. The really crappy part about it was there was nothing he could do to prevent those feelings from coming. The guilt he was prepared for; he had been waiting for something to happen to her for so long that he couldn't not expect it. But the sorrow, the gut-wrenching sorrow that twisted inside of him, he could never have prepared himself for.

It wasn't just the she died some horrible tragic death kind of sorrow either. It was the sorrow that came with the knowledge that Dean would never get to lay eyes on Lisa again without putting her back in that extreme danger he had just removed her from. And that was the worst part. To save Lisa, he had to kill a part of himself.


Thanks so much for reading! I'm really glad it turned out the way it did (mostly because it took a freaking ridiculous amount of time to write). Thanks so much to my beta reader jojospn for taking the time to read over this for me! Please leave me a review and let me know what you think!

~Red!