Kanashimi no Hate ni

(At the Limits of Sorrow)

The disclaimers, all you know them. And I only hope you to enjoy this silly story (my first Soujiro/Misao fic).

Chapter 1: Kodoku (Solitude)

~*~

"So Shishio-sama lost the battle, ne?" this time he didn't show the trace of a grin. Beside him was this tall Juppongatana called Anji, a merciful monk that was sitting in a rock looking lonely at the flaming construction.

"So it seems…what are you going to do now, kid?" he asked the still calm boy that stood beside him. Anji tried to find some hint of anger or even sorrow in the 'kid's' face. He found none.

"I'll guess that I'll go to find my own answers as Himura-sama did after the Bakumatsu Era." This time Anji stood up.

"Wandering?" he said half surprised. This time the boy nodded finally giving him a sharp smile.

"And you Anji-san?" he asked in a calm voice. Anji sighed; slowly he lowered his head to see the grass beneath him.

"I'll give myself to the police, to amend my sins." He muttered in thin tone. The boy started to walk away from the point from they were standing.

"Good Luck, Soujiro-kun!" Anji finally said in his usual confident tone.

And that was the farewell between the last members of the Juppongatana.

~*~

Tokyo, 2 years after Shishio's death.

The boy shielded his eyes from the uncomfortable beams the new dawn have brought. He still had that farewell on his mind, every trip he made, and every job he had in the different districts of Japan always reminded him about Anji's words.

To amend my sins… Good Luck, Soujiro-kun…

What are you going to do now, kid?

Kid?

He chuckled while remembering that every member of the Juppongatana called him kid. And still while he was wandering on the streets. He could hear people whisper in aversion.

'You see son, kids shouldn't be walking with a sword over the streets.'

'Hey kid, aren't you too young to use that sharpie thing?'

'No kid, no swords allowed, you shouldn't be carrying that, you know? Weapons are for man, not for weak kids like you.

'There goes the kid that hadn't any childhood.'

Again his smile rose again, the last statement was so true. He didn't care about he looked too young for his age. Neither if he carried a forbidden weapon. He was here because he wanted to search the answer right? He heard Himura found it after 11 years of wandering.

Mou! And I have only wandered for two!

Is not that he was desperate; he had still a life to learn. He also had the chance to live what he lacked when he was the Tenken. Maybe if he visited the former Battousai's place maybe he could accelerate this search.

"Hey! Soujiro! Whatcha doin' here in Tokyo all by yourself? You didn't get caught, eh?" a genki voice greeted him from behind. Soujiro new his presence when he approached. His smile never leaving his boyish features, he turned around to look at the blonde spiky officer.

"Hai, as you may see I didn't get myself into trouble. I'm good at disappearing." This time Seta showed him a wide grin.

"You better watch out my friend, if my boss sees ya around maybe you'll get into trouble…" the spiky officer looked from both sides with a little of fear.

"Don't worry Chou-san, I'll be all right. Now that you're here, may you do me a favor?" Soujiro asked kindly. Chou only looked at him with rather hesitation but then he waved him to get inside to the nearest restaurant. The Akabeko.

"Ohayo minna-san! A table for two?" Another gentle soul popped from the restaurant's door. Both Soujiro and Cho were shocked at the hostess entrance. Soujiro nodded with little sweat drops while Cho was standing out proud praying all along he was a police officer. Seta only sweat dropped more. Finally the hostess named Tae, passed them to a hidden corner which Cho always used for 'private meetings'. And only an exclusive waitress would serve them.

"Excuse me Cho-san, but Tsubame is kind of busy today. I'll send you another waiter one hundred percent reliable." Tae bowed in pardon. Soujiro only nodded back and thought about how manipulating that hostess could be. To change Cho's stubbornness was really something special.

"Tsubame?" Seta turned his face to his former Juppongatana ally. Cho chuckled quite nervous, he still didn't like the way Soujiro could read his feelings or movements.

"Well, she's a girl…that whenever I eat here she serves me…" the spiky officer looked aside at the relentless stare he was receiving from the Tenken.

"Serves you…" he muttered quite mockingly. Chou started to stutter like an idiot and sending daggers to his old friend.

"Not that way you hentai baka! It's just that my high rank meetings have to be with a reliable person to waiter us!" he half babbled half snorted. Soujiro now was laughing briefly then eyeing him suspiciously.

"And don't dare to look me like that! Mou! She's a girl! Like in her thirteen's! I dunno!!" now he was yelling.

"Maa, maa Chou-kun. I believe you, now, may we order? I'm starving!" He grinned again showing his white teeth in the process. Chou calmed down as he whistled for the new 'reliable' waitress. Then the new 'waitress' appeared from the darkness, it was a really hidden corner.

"May I …take your… order sir…?" a boyish pant came from the 'waitress'.

"Are you the reliable good-looking waitress?!!!" Chou snorted. Soujiro only scratched the back of his head grinning nervously as he saw how the 'waitress' (that was as a male) snapped out.

"I'm a boy! Male! Get it Broom-head!" Kami-sama that boy wasn't happy. Chou stood up from his place and eyed him from head to toe.

"Who are you calling Broom-head?! At least I'm not wearing a stupid little hat with flowers on it! Now, how male is that, huh?!" Chou growled. The boy wasn't going to give in so easily, Seta noticed by the harsh glare he was giving to the 'broom head'. Even Soujiro laughed at the nickname.

"You too Soujiro! Oh geez kid! Give me a break! Help me with the brat!" Chou squeaked as the boy was now gritting his teeth on the officer's spikes.

"Gomen nasai Chou-san, I thought that the great officer would handle all by himself." Soujiro grinned while Chou was sending him a death glare.

"You shouldn't messed up with me, brat! I'm a member of the ex-Juppongatana with the Tenken by my side!" the squeaking broom head was now shaking the brat off of his hair. In the other hand, some people started to exit the building yelling and screaming; 'Shishio's Jinchuu'. He never thought about it, and he really didn't care about continuing Shishio's wishes. It was time for him to spare some time in HIS own decisions. That's why he really liked wandering; he was feeling free to choose his own path.

Great! Now everybody knows we were Shishio's followers…

Soujiro thought while stroking his throbbing temples. He didn't want a escene about all this, he only wanted to…

"Are you trying to kill Kenshin?! Over my dead body! I'm Yahiko Myoujin! And I'm not going to let you kill Kenshin!" the boy that was still grinding Chou's spikes, shouted out loud. Soujiro's eyes brightened, this boy knew about Himura's place.

"Uh, Yahiko-chan, do you know where Himura-sama is?" Soujiro smiled gently at the boy that now snapped his eyes to shot him a death glare. Bad idea Tenken, bad idea.

"CHAN?! KUSO! WHOM ARE YOU CALLING CHAN!! YOU STUPID BRAT!!" the boy leaped down from Chou's struggling face to the ground, looking merciless at the Tenken's face. The now outraged officer grabbed him by the collar of his uniform lifting him from the ground.

"Don't you dare to call Tenken no Soujiro like that! Do you know who he is? He's…" The broom head started snorting about Soujiro's great speed and that he was the best of the Juppongatana. Seta only crossed his arms over the table sighing deeply. Now more people was yelling out more 'Shishio's Jinnchu'. Kami-sama this was going to take a long time.

"Chou-kun…unhand him, onegai Chou-kun. Now with your outburst you're probably going to bring your boss right here." Soujiro tried to rationalize with the broom-head officer. Finally Chou gave in and returned the boy to the ground.

"Gomen nasai for calling you 'chan'. You know, they usually call me 'kid' when I'm only 24." The former boyish looking assassin smiled apologetically at Yahiko. Yahiko's eyes widened.

"You…you… oh well, Kenshin looks younger than he already is…so…" the boy started to 'hum' in deep thought.

"Now could you please tell me where Himura-sama is?" he said kindly. Yahiko again stared at him suspiciously.

"For what?" Yahiko snapped but in the end he controlled his temper.

"I need to see him for personal reasons." He said bluntly. Yahiko shook his head then he pointed the broom head that was now confused about the kid's actions.

"Ah… ah… when they all want to see Kenshin for personal reasons they always want to send him straight to his grave…" Yahiko explained while he was sticking out his tongue to the officer that was kicking his feet.

"Aa. I see. Don't worry Yahiko-kun. I promise that my reasons don't include killing…" he beamed at the child's worry about his friend.

Shishio-sama was never worried about me; He always thought I was too sovereign of my life and too strong to be worried about.

Soujiro shook his head aside; Chou was now observing the brat glaring at him periodically.

"How can I trust you?" he spit it blunty. Too blunty for the former assassins taste.

"I'll tell you what, give us some meal and drinks and my friend will give you a generous tip." He patted the boy's shoulder giving his innocent smile.

"Are you telling me to sell Kenshin?!" he spatter out again while bashing away Soujiro's hand. Soujiro only half smiled, a big fat sweat drop crossing his cheek.

Where…where…where have I seen this kind of temper…so dense…and STUPID!

Chou gritted his teeth, this boy was getting to his nerves.

"What should I do for you to trust me, Yahiko-san?" Soujiro inquired as Chou's face paled. He high ranked that brat! From 'kun' to 'san'!! But this was only Soujiro's tactic, the officer turned to see a daydreaming Yahiko sputtering 'He called me –san!!'. 

Chou only wanted to puke, since when Soujiro came from the Powerful Tenken to the Begging Wanderer. This was somewhat familiar; it was just too much for the broom-head to follow the thread.

"Well, its difficult to trust in Shishio's ally. You see, if you give me the katana, I'll guide you to him. Ok?" he finally concurred with the former enemy. Soujiro smiled to his persuasion as Chou only hummed in hesitation.

Smart boy, but not enough. If he had my katana I could easily fetch it away from him with only one sweep. But…wait…he's giving me the chance to prove that I'm not an assassin.

If I got some guilt of my sins. The thing is…that I have no emotions…neither guilt nor remorse…I fought for my actions…and for what I believed in…

"Hey! Seta! We've got a talk and the brat is waiting for your order!" Cho woke up Soujiro from his chain of thoughts.

"I would like some ramen, some gohan with soy and some warm green tea please." He laid the card over the table while the boy was making some strange gestures when he was scribbling in his notebook. Finally the brat left the room and now Chou had his full attention to the boyish assassin.

"So what do you want to talk about?" he tapped the door, some boredom was written on his face. Since that boy left, Chou was kinda bored.

"Hmm, I've already solved it. So why don't we enjoy this meal Chou-san?" he said soothingly to avoid any other outburst from the broom… ahem…Chou.

"You did? Don't tell me that you only wanted to know Battousai's place?" some hints of anger rose on his tone. Soujiro gulped then smiled lastly he nodded. To the 'kid's' surprise the spiky officer sighed in defeat.

"So, tell me something, I don't wanna hear about your journeys, I just wanna know about Shishio's death." Some glint of flame flashed across his dark pools.

"To be honest, I didn't saw how Shishio-sama died. But I suggest to change the subject, lets have a normal talk, those events are now of the past, and it's kind of rude to talk about Shishio…and…" Soujiro trailed off while the officer waved the reasons for later. Yahiko came up with their meals and both men started to enjoy their food silently.

"So…do you… miss him?" Chou inquired full-mouthed. Soujiro looked at him puzzled and sorta disgusted to see the mass…on there…smashed…and… let's forget about it.

"Miss who?" Soujiro asked muttering still in trance about Chou's non-table manners.

"Shishio, everyone from the group thought that he was like a father to you." Chou this time grabbed some of his sake and poured it on the cup, in one gulp the liquid was gone. Soujiro didn't pay attention to Chou's words, he rather stare blankly at his hands, well, his manners.

"He wasn't my father…he was my master…" he replied still staring blankly at the table. The spiky officer stopped eating and stared at the boy closer and closer. The light in his eyes was gone, and there wasn't any sign of an 'innocent smile' coming. Maybe he shouldn't bring up that topic.

"And you were saying?" another reply came from a different Soujiro. This time it was time for Chou to look puzzled, his eyes and smile were back to normal. What just have happened seconds ago? Chou scratched his head and stood up from his place. He paid the check and Soujiro stood up too. Chou entered the kitchen while Soujiro walked outside of the building.

"Now, lets go!" Chou commanded to the struggling boy he had under his grip. Soujiro laid his slim hand over Chou's arm.

"Get him down, you know your way back to your office, ne?" Soujiro's innocent smile stroke again. Chou opened his mouth in dissent. Was this 'kid' going to be with Battousai all alone and without him…as a member of the Tokyo Police he MUST know what was behind Seta's meeting with Battousai. He had too…

"I will be all right, again, don't worry about me, my personal reasons don't endanger or hurt anyone." Somewhat Soujiro soothed the tempered spiky officer. Finally Chou gave up to questions or assumptions and let the kid and the brat go all alone.

While they were walking, Yahiko silently checked the grinning wanderer from head to toe. He looked so much like Kenshin in a way; their 'innocent smiles' were both distressing. And the kindness too. It gave Yahiko creeps about thinking Soujiro saying a girl -dono.

Was this an effect that 'wandering' make to its victimis?

The Kamiya student wondered then he glanced back to his companion's sword.

"Hand me your sword." He commanded. Soujiro stopped his tracks looking at him rather baffled. Then he took the sword from his obi and hand it to Yahiko.

"You're going to return it back to me, ne?" he chuckled with innocence, if he didn't return his katana to him he would…

"How did you get it?" he asked looking with awe at the weapon. Soujiro half smiled to him and patted the hilt of his sword.

"I once worked as bodyguard for some high ranked politicians. The sword was given to me when I decided to quit that job." He replied honestly.

"As a payment?" Yahiko asked still looking at the sword as a jewel or something. The Seta boy only nodded.

"Did you kill someone with this sword?" This Himura boy took Soujiro aback for the second time. He looked at his prohibited weapon then to the querying eyes of the boy.

"No, that's why I keep it. If I have to kill someone it has to be because of my own reasons, not because someone hired me and tell me to kill that person…" he responded half taken.

"I see, so you're keeping Kenshin's statement of 'No killing'?" Soujiro smiled at that.

"Are we getting any closer to Himura-sama's lair?" he practically changed the subject.

End of Chapter 1

Another Story about 'How you match our tenken with the weasel…'. I was inspired by this beautiful masterpiece 'Crimson skies' (just read it!) from Chibi-Angel. She inspired me a lot, and she opened my eyes into a new '/' for our weasel. Thanks for reading this! Kind flames? Suggestions. I drown myself about my awful grammar, gomen nasai!

For the next chapter: Chatting with the  Oro-man and some hesitation. C' ya. Ja ne!