I wake up in a pile of manure. I'm not sure how I got here... There's a needle in my arm - looks like it was pushed all the way in.

I hear children laughing, and women carrying on about their business... so happy... so naive. My body has been numb for quite

some time now. I think it's been 3 - no, 4 hours since I first opened my eyes. Or maybe only a few minutes... either way, I

knew I couldn't just lie here forever... no, not forever...

A few more hours have passed now I think. I let out a deep sigh. Sweet lord I wish I could move... How did I get here? It

doesn't make any sense to me... Let me try to move a finger... FUCK!! Too much pain! Okay, okay... Try the other hand...

Success. I can feel a tingling sensation start to work it's way up my arm, into my shoulder, and across my chest... I can

move my head now. A few more minutes pass. I can feel. I can stand. I can live. Fuck YES. I try to walk... damn... knee deep

in cow shit. I eventually wiggle myself free, the sounds of sucking and flatulent sounds are all I can hear... I still have no

idea where I am... Is THIS hell?... No... it's too beautiful... Is this heaven? No. Ha! This is no fairy tale...

I wander aimlessly down alley ways and seemingly empty streets, the needle still protruding from my arm... It feels nice there...

I decide to walk into a local tavern, might as well take some of the edge off.

"Liquor." The first words I speak when I approach the bar. The bartender gives me a "go to hell" look... But sure as shit he pours me

a shot. "That's right bitch," I think to my self as finishes pouring me a shot. Half a millisecond later and the burn from the alcohol

has already subsided.

"Another," I tell him. He pours me another shot... before he can put the bottle back down I demand another. He pours it. I slam it. It's

about this time i realize a man staring me down from the end of the bar. I don't like this one bit. What the fuck does he want? Maybe

he's a fag... gross. I consider approaching him... but the thought is dismissed twice as quick as it was accumulated. Don't need him

going all fag on me, not after those three, - i slam another - four shots... I might vomit... wait, that might be funny. I approach him slowly.

I can feel his stare as I get closer and closer, like a barrage of bullets piercing every inch of my body he can see. I'm finally standing at

his feet, his eyes locked on mine... I tap him on the shoulder to get his attention.

"There a problem, friend?" he asks in an almost upsetting tone of voice.

"No problem..." I respond. "You some sort of fag?" I inquire modestly.

My sight goes red, and suddenly I find myself laying face-up on the ground. My nose hurts, so I touch it.. FUCK! More pain... and... blood?

What? Who put blood on MY nose? Probably that fag... Now the bartender is hovering above me, clearing insulting my intelligence by

asking me to count the two fingers he had up... Oh shit, no that's only one.. yes, one, I see it so clearly now. He helps me to my feet,

continuing to ask me silly questions which I pay no attention to, and saying something about police.. This frightens me. I hate pigs.

Almost as much as I hate Jews... Almost... Not two minutes later, and I'm wandering back down the alleys again, searching... for something.

I wonder what god masturbates to. Probably dead babies...

My eyes wince as the sun starts to rise... or is that the moon... Maybe I should take this needle out... No, it be fine. Just need to squeeze a

little more of "gods glory" into my veins... Ah, there we go. Now, back to what I was doing...

I wake up again, laying face-up... again... Only this time I feel fine. Fuck no, better than fine. I feel fantastic. That's some pretty powerful stuff.

I rise to my feet, and notice a sign in the window of an apartment in the alley. "G...G..God?" I speak aloud as I try to make sense of the word.

Why would someone have a sign that says "God" in there window? The curiosity alone drives me to further investigate. Room 9-1 1. It appears

the cheap apartment management can't afford to fix fallen number spacers on the apartment doors... I bet their terrorists. Fucking packys.

"Knock-Knock-knockknockknock--knock-knock" i laugh to myself as I knock, repeating the familiar saying in my head. I can feel someones eye

peering at me through the peep hole. It burns. "Who is it?" I hear him say in a familiar voice.

"I was just wondering about the sign in your window..." I tell him "Go away!" he shouts. I kick the door in, smashing his face in the process.

He rolls around on the ground screaming "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" I ignore his cries, and walk towards the window with the sign... There's nothing

here? I whip around to demand answers from the man on the floor but, he's gone... And the door.. On it's hinges. How? What? Nawwwwww.

I feel a hand touch my shoulder and jerk around violently, slapping the person in the face on "accident." "Dad?" I barely manage to form the

word. "My son," He tells me, "You have many journeys ahead of you. You have done many good deeds, and caused many a bad man turn

good," at this point I have already shit myself. God.. The creator... My father... But wait... No, it couldn't be... Am I... 'Jesus'? Daaaammmn.

Bad ASS. "You need not fear death, or pain my son, for I am always with you, and will always protect you," What kind of bull shit? "I will always

be there to guide you in the dark, and comfort you when you are afraid. I only ask one thing of you my child..." I take a moment to decide

whether or not I want to hear anymore packy talk... "What is it that you ask of me father?" I guess I'll play along for now... "Love always,

without bias, without judgement, and without temptation"

"Even niggers?" I ask earnestly

"Even niggers."

I tell him I will do this for him. But what's the point of promising something if you can't piss someone off by breaking it? I mean seriously...

And so now I wander the earth, forever spreading love, hate, and semen over every man, woman, child, and mongoloid. Hoping one day to...

uhh... don't worry about it.