Remember, this is a visual play, so imagine you're watching tv. If you hate play style writing, then don't bother to feast a' your eyes-a.

Scene: Mushroom Kingdom, Mario's Pipe House

Outside: *knock knock knock* Hey Mario! I um, I need help about...life?!

Me: Noel Vermillion, a lass that's seeking guidance and help from someone. I know I'm a doctor and all, but I'm not a therapist. America, I'm a' speakin' to ya today because she 's knockin' on my door as I speak-a. I don't a' know if I can be of any assistance. I guess I'll nicely tell her to shove off. Come in!

Enter Noel

Noel: H-hey Mario.

Me: Hiya. I likes a' fanz that take their time to pay me a visit.

Noel: U-Um...yeah but...see this...oh why did I bother!

Me: No youngster!

Noel: Eh?

Me: Why do you shake in fear? What's agonizing you lass?

Noel: Ah, well there's this thing called life and...it HATES ME!

Me: Now now dear. Life gives a' all hell rides. Life is a horde of choices, consists of two paths, which are good and evil. What you cull is all you but don't let it bring you down like a' this.

Noel: Okay. Now I know life but, this guy. He hates me, the air I breath, everything I touch, he, he, HATES ME!

Me: My chest can be rained on for so long. You're in military service right? Just shoot him and keep on.

Noel: WHAT?!

Me: Or kong-fu his ass or somethin'.

Noel: WHY MAJOR?! THAT'S NOT ME! I'M NOT A KILLER!

Me: Major? Hey I was just playin' now.

Noel: Huh? But my major says the same thing to me when I come to him for advice. Was that suppose to cheer me up?

Me: Well youngster, it's your decision to laugh. Now Peach is a' comin' here any second and the last a' thing I want is her to pound me to death because of you; She'll thing I'm a molesting pedophile. Here's a gift; I want you to visit everyone on this list and return here when you finish. They should help you out. They are all deer friends a' mine.

Noel: Yes mayor. Oops, sorry.

Me: That's a fine. Now hurry on now!

Noel exits, Peach enters

Me: Out she goes. Accepting my quest for some acknowledgment of life, she travels to the first person on the list.

Peach: Who are you talking to sweetie?

Me: Oh hey honey. I'm a' speakin' to America, like you know, Bernie Mac from his show.

Peach: My my, you are always talking to yourself. So that show motivated you to be a little crazy?

Me: Normal folks talk a' to themselves to.

Peach: Well it's Thanksgiving! You know what that means.

Me: America, happy Thanksgiving! And I hope you made lots of em' sweet potatoes! And make sure they're real smooth and tasty to them lips; make it's sanctified taste explore your whole internal organs LET'S A GO!

Peach: Baby stop talking to the camera and rescue me from Sweet Bowser!

Me: A man's gotta do what's he gotta do! Here I go!

Camera shuts off