Ragnarok Online - Lucky Lucky Vol.1 (Beta 1)

Authors Note: This is actually the script for my Ragnarok Online doujinshi that I started a long time ago. Since I'm faster at writing then drawing the doujinshi out frame by frame, I decided to put the script up, just so that it wasn't lying around collecting dust anywhere. If you would like to read the actual doujinshi. Just go to my home page (it should be in my profile) and take a look for yourself.

Oh yes, and this story was written in the beta 1 level of the RO game. Before second job classes and all that were implemented.

Chapter One: Getting Lucky

(The picture and profile info at the beginning of every Lucky Lucky doujinshi chapter)

Name: Zoink
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Job Class: Merchant
Hobbies: Girls

Zoink is the owner of the newly refinished Lucky Lucky Bar. Unfortunately business has been slow and not many people have been coming. So Zoink came up with the idea that is he filled his bar with cute female workers, not only will it be good on his own eyes, but may attract customers as well...

*Zoink a short blue haired merchant sits alone in his clean, empty bar, he looks ready to sleep*

Zoink: So quiet...

*a short haired light blond Acolyte opens the door, barging in*

Acolyte: BOSS! We need to talk!

*he hold a paper in front of Zoink's face, on it is written...*

Advertisement: HELP WANTED: Looking for members to join party. Must be willing to work from 8am-6pm weekdays, and special assignments 7pm-12 am weekdays, 7am-12 am on weekends. Members will enjoy the following benefits.
-free room and board
-free food and meals
-20% discount off anything sold in stores
-20% overcharge on things sold to store
-free teleportation services
For those interested in joining please apply at the Lucky Lucky Bar.
-manager

Acolyte: You're never going to get any members with an add like that!

Zoink: Oh? Why's that?

Acolyte: The Looking for female members part warns girls right away that you're a pervert... and the special assignments thing, it's obvious that something is up!!

Zoink: Oh really? Is it that obvious?

*The Acolyte picks up a glass of wine on the counter and begins to drink it*

Acolyte: I'd be surprised if ANYONE answered it.

Zoink: Hey! It's your add too... see! Free teleportation services.

Acolyte: !! WHAT!? Just because you hired me to teleport make me part of your pervert plan!?!?

Zoink: Well you ARE working for me on it.

Acolyte: EHH!?!? THEN I QUIT!

*A young boy with short brown hair and a bandana type hood watches them, having entered the bar unnoticed*

Little Boy Mage: Ummm... excuse me... Hello? Hello?

*he catches the two's attention*

Little Mage: Is this place... Lucky Lucky Bar?

Zoink: ... what do you want kid?

Little Mage: Hello!! My name's Suki To-Itte! I've come because of the help wanted sign. At the bottom it said to apply here.

Zoink: WHA!?!?!? No way!! You're not a chick!!

Acolyte: Heheheh Not quiet the type you were looking for ne?

Suki: I'm 12 years old, level 13 mage!! I can do some ice magic and I know nalpume beat too!!

Zoink: NO! You can't join!

Suki: Hu!? Why not?

Zoink: Because you're not a girl!!

Acolyte: Hello Suki, name's Vincent Eternity. I'm the teleporter.

Suki: Wow! Nice to meet you Vincent! I'm Suki! Your new team mate!

Zoink: I said NO!

Acolyte: Awww, come on Zoink, let the kid stay. It's not like anyone else is going to answer your advertisement.

*the door to Lucky Lucky opens and a scream fills the air*

Swords woman: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!

*a pretty swords woman runs up to the young Mage, head over heals*

Swords woman: What a cute little kid!!! How old is he!? Is he yours!? I love his outfit! Is he a mage!? How adorable!!

*Zoink watches the scene, talking to Vincent*

Zoink: So... girls like kids then? I guess he can stay...

Vincent: ... My ears hurt *did not like the sudden scream*

*the swords woman notices the two. she looks at Zoink*

Swords woman: Oh!! Are you the manager of Lucky Lucky!? The ad. said to come here.

Zoink: *with hearts in his eyes* Manager of Lucky Lucky! That's me!!

Swords woman: Name's Kurion, been looking high and low for a job like this. Free stuff along with a much needed 20% discount and overcharge. That will definitely save me a pretty penny or two.

*She sighs looking a little tired*

Kurion: After all... providing for 16 can cost a lot...

Zoink: 16? Is that your age!?

Kurion: 16... you flatter me darlin' I wish I were that young again. 16 is the amount of children I have.

Vincent: ... 16... kids...?

Zoink: Just how old is she really...?

Vincent: Well if she has 16 kids that would make her A LOT older then you...

Suki: WOW!! 16 kids!! Are any of them my age!?!?

Kurion: Well darlin' that would depend on your age. I've got all kinds of ages. All boys too.

*a female thief walks in between them, no one noticing her presence until then*

Suki: hu?

Kurion: Where did you come from???

*the thief holds up the advertisement in Zoink's face*

Zoink: What this??? You want to join??

Thief: ...

Kurion: She doesn't talk much does she...

Suki: I still wanna know where she came from.

Zoink: Well? Is that what you want

Thief: ...

*she turns around, walking over to a set of table and chairs, taking a seat and watching them*

Zoink: I can't read your mind you know!

Vincent: She doesn't seem to be leaving... so I guess that she wants to join... or wants more info.

Zoink: Well she gave me one of the adds I posted so I know it had something to so with that.

Kurion: She doesn't talk. Do you think she's a mute? Or just doesn't like to talk to people?

Suki: She's cute!!

Zoink: Suki! You're off topic... but ya, she is niiiccce looking

Vincent: To tell you the truth I think she's creepy.

*the door opens again and this time a spastic looking pink haired female archer with large glasses barges in*

Freaky Archer: Is this bar open!?!? I need something to drink!!

Zoink: Ummm... actually, Lucky Lucky Bar doesn't open until 7... if you could just come back later.

Freaky Archer: Give me something HARD!!! The best you got!! Cause I'm hyper!! Hyper!! Hyper!! HYPER!!! an I need something strong to knock me out!!

Zoink: But... we're closed...

Freaky Archer: Well that's okay with me!! I'll just hang around here until it's open then!! I don't have anywhere else to go!!

Zoink: You don't have to so that you know... you can leave if you want... *hopes the freaky chick leaves*

Freaky Archer: No that's okay!! I'm good waiting here NYAHAHAHAHA!!! *NARF* *SNORT*

Zoink: ... no really... leeeave...

Freaky Archer: HYPER!! HYPER!! HYPER!! I'm soooo hyper what should I do!?

Zoink: Vincent!! Teleport her away!!!

Vincent: 1500 Zeny.

Zoink: WHAT!?!?

Vincent: Teleportation costs money. At least for you it does.

*Suki ignores the scene and has approached the silent thief, surprising her*

Suki: Hello! My name is Suki! What's yours?

*Vincent and Zoink continue to argue about money, while another person enters the bar, this one a sexy hot long silver haired mage. Complete with cat ears*

Zoink: If you think I'm going to spend my hard earned money on HER you are VERY mistaken.

Sexy Mage: Hi!

*the group turn and notice her. Zoink looks very happy*

Zoink: HIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!

Vincent: *sigh* heya...

Suki: Hello!!!

Freaky Archer: NYAHAHAHAHAH *mind is off in another world*

Thief: ...

Kurion: Hey girl!

Zoink: Please tell me you saw the flyer and you're here to join and make my dreams come true!!!!!!

Sexy Mage: Hoe did you guess?

Zoink: YES!!!

Vincent: This looks to good to be true... are you a man or something like that?

*Zoink kicks Vincent in the head*

Zoink: SHUT UP VINCENT!! YOU'LL JYNX ME!!!

Sexy Mage: Hahahaha! That's a good one... Don't worry, I'm 100% woman *wink*

Zoink: YES!!!

Sexy Mage: Name's Cider.

Kurion: Cider? Like the juice?

Cider: Yes! Just like a tall cool glass of apple cider.

Zoink: I like apple Cider!!!

*Cider spots the thief*

Cider: Oh? What do we have here?

*pulls the female thief closer to her*

Cider: Hey there, couldn't help but notice you sitting here.

Thief: ......

Cider: Oh... the silent type... I adore that.

*The thief vanishes from sight, using her hide skill*

Cider: Oh? Shy too are we? Come on there's no need to hide from me. I won't bite unless I'm told too.

Vincent: ... is she hitting on that girl?

Suki: She disappeared!!!

Zoink: Just when I thought my luck was looking up...

Female Acolyte: Here we are!! Lucky Lucky!

Zoink: Oh? The voice of a woman? Could this be my glimmer of sunshine behind the clouds?

*turns to see the cute female acolyte*

Zoink: YES!!

Vincent: It's another Acolyte...

Zoink: We could always use a better one!!

Vincent: Better?? *glares*

Female Acolyte: Why hello there! We've come to get hired!

*Vincent is in the middle of strangling Zoink for his comment*

Vincent: We've?

Female Acolyte: Yes!! Me and my twin sister!!

*holds her hand out to an empty spot beside her, she realized the area beside her is empty*

Female Acolyte: Oh?? Where did she go? She was right here just a moment ago.

*Zoink has managed to get free of Vincent's strangle hold, and now has Vincent in a death grip*

Zoink: No way!! Cute twins!! This is wonderful!!!

*Vincent punches Zoink in the face, breaking free, calmly turning to the new acolyte*

Vincent: So... are you a man?

Female Acolyte: ...man? No, no, I'm a girl.

*She reaches outside the entrance, grabbing onto something and yanking it inside*

Female Acolyte: So is she!

*The aco has yanked in a short haired blond with in male archer's clothes*

Archer: OWWW!! Let go of me!! I said I didn't want to come!!

*everyone stares at the archer*

All: She?

Female Acolyte: Yes! Yes!!

Zoink: Looks like a guy to me...

Vincent: *points his finger in the archer's face* So you're a man then!!

*the archer turns around and leaves, the female archer stops her by grabbing onto her scarf*

Archer: Let go!! I don't want to be part of some woman's group.

Female Acolyte: You're staying with me whether you like it or not, understand?

Archer: ... Whatever...

*Zoink walks up and whispers in the acolyte's ear*

Zoink: erm... are you sure she's a girl?

Female Acolyte: Of course I'm sure! We grew up together after all!

Zoink: ... but then how come she has no... no...

*he points to his chest*

Female Acolyte: Has no... finger?

Female Acolyte: Oh she has fingers! Five on each hand! Maybe you just didn't see them the first time!

Zoink: ... No! Not fingers! What I'm pointing at!

Female Acolyte: Neck...? Chest...? Chest...??? OH!! I got it!! BREASTS!!! Where are her BREASTS!!!

All: ...

*the cross dressing Archer hides in embarrassment in the background*

Female Acolyte: Abut that...

*she leans over, whispering in Zoink's ear*

Female Acolyte: She hides them.

Vincent: How the heck does she pull THAT off??

Female Acolyte: Well you take lots of long bandages and wrap them tightly around your

Kurion: Sound's painful...

Female Acolyte: Well... she does it because she's a tomboy you see.

Zoink: So... she has them but she's just hiding them?

Female Acolyte: Yes! Normal she's around the same size as me!

*Zoink gets a dirty picture in his head, he looks over at the archer slyly, approaching her and pinning her against the wall*

Zoink: Alright, show me what you've got!!!

Archer: What the hell do you think you're doing!?!?

*she grabs onto Zoink, flipping him over and smashing his head into the ground*

Zoink: *lying mangled on the ground* Are you sure she's a girl??

Female Acolyte: Positive

*The archer points an accusing finger at Zoink*

Archer: BASTARD!!

*Cider sneak up from behind, grabbing the archer's butt*

Cider: Hummm... This is definitely a girl's butt. There's no mistake that this is a woman.... and a nice one at that...

Archer: ... That's it... I'm leaving...

*the female aco tackles the archer to the ground, preventing her from doing any such thing*

Female Acolyte: NO!!! YOU'RE NOT LEAVING!!!

Archer: There's nothing you can say to make me stay!

*the aco smashes a mace next to the archer's head*

Archer: Okay! Okay! I'll stay! I'll Stay!

Female Acolyte: THAT'S GREAT!!!

*the archer gets back up*

Archer: Geeze...

*flops down onto the chair the invisible thief is sitting on, getting startled by sitting on someone and they both crash to the ground*

Kurion: Ah? Are you two kids okay?

Archer: NOO!!! I'm not okay! I don't want to be here!!!

Thief: *says a word that is covered with a black censored box everyone is in shock*

Archer: What did you just call me!?!?!?

Thief: *repeats her censored box*

Archer: Wha!? How can you do that!?!? Whenever I try to say something like that I go message can not be sent because insult is detected!!!

Thief: ... stupid archer.

Archer: Lousy thief!!!

*the archer and the thief start fighting censored boxes and this message can not be displayed... play continually in the background*

Zoink: It's almost 7... I need to get them signed up before it opens!!

Zoink: Okay everyone!! It's time for the meeting so sit down and listed!

*everyone ignores him watching the brawl*

Zoink: Excuse me... excuse me...

*after getting the archer and the thief broken apart the meeting begins with the archer tied to a chair*

Female Aco: Good girl! *patting the archer on the head*

Zoink: Okay, you've all read the flyer so you know what times you will be working and the benefits, are there any questions?

Cider: Will we be sharing rooms?

Zoink: Yes, two per room, how does that sound?

Cider: Sounds great to me *looks at the thief* I wonder who I'll get to bunk with?

*the thief disappears with the hide skill again*

Cider: Well you're no fun...

Kurion: Is there a limit to the amount of free food you we have?

Zoink: As much as you want I guess...

Kurion: Good!!! Because I have a lot of hungry kids!

Zoink: ...

Vincent: hehehehehehe....

Calico: Free Food!? Does that include drinks!?!?

Vincent: Yes *evil smile*

Zoink: !!!! Don't listen to Vincent!! He's not sane!!

Calico: Free drink!! ALRIGHT!!! Sign me up!! I want free drink!!!

Zoink: Oh god...

Female Aco: What are the rules?

Zoink: Ah yes, I'm glad you asked. The rules are as follows:
1) no smoking on the job
2) be on time
3) shower daily
4) -

Archer: Wha?

Zoink: I'm not finished!!
4) fighting is not permitted unless it is a pillow fight or mud wrestling supervised by me
5) if your too hot take off your shirt
6) if you are too cold come speak to me and I will help warm you up.
7) Do not harm the manager if he walk in on you while you are changing, after all you should have locked the doors
8) Do not lock the doors
9)

*Vincent covers Zoink's mouth*

Vincent: I think that's enough.

Zoink: but there's still more!! I haven't even gotten to the if you panties go missing don't look for them in the mangers room cause they won't be there one!!!

*silence*

Suki: You mean my undies might go missing!?

Zoink: ... NOT YOURS!!!

Suki: Oh okay that good to hear!!

Suki: Question!! *raises hand* do we have to work everyday?

Zoink: Only the special assignments have to be done everyday, normal missions will not be everyday, and will only be every once in a while.

Archer: What's the special assignment exactly?

Zoink: So!! Who wants to join? If you want to join just step up here and sign this contract!!

*all stepping forward one by one*

Suki: ME!!!

Kurion: Of course, I need the food and the discounts

Cider: Of course I'll join, after all there are so many cute team members

Thief: ... *steps up and signs her name*

Zoink: Vandal... Rift... so that's your name?

Suki: Oh! You wanted to know her name? You could have just asked me! After all she told me ^^

Zoink: What? She actually spoke to you?

Suki: She was telling me all kinds of things about herself!!! Like her home town is Morrow, she hates poring and all kinds of stuff!!

Zoink: ... no way...

Suki: Oh yeah and she's 15!! That's only 3 years older then me!! We're almost the same age!!!

Zoink: ...

Calico: I'm in I'm in I'm IN!!!!

*Zoink tries to take the sheet away*

Zoink: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Female Aco: There we go! *holds club up Kura's head* Your turn ^^

Archer: ... fine...

Zoink: *reads names* ... Kurapika-chan and Kurapika?

Kura-chan (aco): I guess mom liked the name ^^

Zoink: Kurapika? Like the Pokémon!?

Kura (archer): WHAT!?!? I am not named after a Pokémon!! I'm named after a great hunter!!

Suki: a hunting Pokémon?

Kura: NO POKEMON!!!

Suki: Pika ^^ Like a Pikachu!

Kura: ... you die... now...

Kura-chan: Pika be nice.

Kura: Don't call me Pika

Zoink: Kids and their temper tantrums...

Kura: !! Who's a kid!?!? I'm 19 years old!

Zoink: No way!! I though you were not that much older then Suki! You act like a little kid!

Kura: ... you though I was 12!!!! Why you!!

Zoink: Okay everyone, here's your jobs for the missions.

*hands them a list on a paper, saying if they were tankers, attacker, supporter, etc.*

Kura: What? I'm a looter? What the hell does that mean!?

Zoink: It means you follow everyone around picking up the items so they don't have to.

Kura: You mean I have to clean up after everyone!?

Vandal: It means you're a poring.

Kura: What did you call me!?!?

Zoink: Alright! Now that all that is figured out! It's time for your first special assignment!

Authors Note: Yes two of the characters are named after Kurapika from Hunter X Hunter (they were two characters most well known characters I played in the game) They will be known as and though, just so that I'm not using Kurapika's name too much. Don't worry, their personalities are nothing like Kurapika's. One is based off of me, while the other... is kinda the opposite of me ^^o