I LIVEEEEE!
*throws a story at you and runs away*
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue.
Keep in mind that Loki's pretty young in this chapter, so his personality hasn't quite developed into the mischievous prankster everyone knows him as.
Sometimes, Odin loved his wife. Other times, he wasn't quite so sure.
Mostly when she refused to help him with his problems.
Particularly of the Loki kind.
Usually, all she would say was, "Darling, you know I love you, but really, he's more your child than mine, considering you're the one who brought him into this world. If you have a problem with what he's doing, then you should deal with it yourself."
Odin suspected this was a plot to make him spend more time with his children, but if he complained, Frigga would merely arch an unimpressed eyebrow and say, "Oh? So you don't want to spend time with your children?"
And what was he to say to that? And thus, inevitably, he ended up having to deal with Loki-related problems by himself. Most of the time, it wasn't too troublesome to deal with, but then, well, Loki started bringing in strays, even after he had already forbid Thor from it: random cats and dogs and birds and frogs and spiders he found while adventuring with his friends. And when Odin went to Frigga about it, she merely smiled serenely and said, "Oh my, he's becoming so much like you. Going out and picking up cute, adorable little things to bring home without even consulting with his wife – ops, I mean parents."
Odin suspected that despite her love of Loki, Frigga was still salty about him making such a major decision like raising another child without consulting her first. Thus, like any brave warrior who had sensed a foe that they could not defeat, he had made a tactical retreat.
But okay, while he could sneakily get rid of animals, he wasn't quite sure what to do about this.
"Father, this is Svadilfari! We worked on a project together in our studies, and we thought it would be cool if we genetically modified a horse to become the fastest horse in history and gift him to you. We named the horse Sleipnir. I hope you like it," a young Loki said shyly, clutching the hand of his friend. Svadilfari smiled reassuringly at Loki, and then Loki blushed.
Odin internally whimpered. There were so many things wrong with this scene he didn't know where to start. Ignoring the… horse for the moment, Loki had a crush. That was terrible. Loki was a delicate soul, and who knew what sort of character this Svadilfari person was? Judging by that fact he came up with the idea for an eight legged horse, he had to be a terrible person. Not to mention that terrible haircut, those ear piercings, those ridiculous clothes and – was that a tattoo Odin saw on his shoulder? Okay, that settled it, this Svadilfari was a terrible person. How had he made Loki fall in love with him? He would probably break Loki's heart. Oh god, what if he took advantage of Loki?! This couldn't be happening yet, Odin's heart wasn't ready for this!
And then there was the horse. It looked absolutely ridiculous, wobbling there with its eight legs. It looked stupid, and it would make Odin look stupid if he sat on it too. Odin was never going to sit on that.
The man stayed silent for a bit, wondering how to handle this situation.
Loki, however, didn't take to the silence well. His smile fell, his lower lip wobbled, and his eyes became suspiciously shiny. He asked, "You don't like him, Father?"
Shit, he's going to cry, Odin realized. He could just imagine Frigga's disapproving remark, "First you basically kidnap a child, and then you make him cry? For shame, Odin. Why did I marry you again?" Quickly, to avoid that result he reassured Loki, "Oh I love it. Him. The horse. Sleipnir, I mean."
"Really?" Loki asked hopefully.
"Yes, it must have been an amazing piece of spellwork. I love it," Odin said, lying unabashedly.
"In fact, he loves it so much that he's decided to make it his personal war horse," said a voice.
Odin stiffened, and gave Freyr the stinkeye. Hadn't that brat gotten over the fact that he'd married his cousin yet? There was no way he was riding that horse anywhere.
"What, really?" Loki asked with big, excited eyes, and Odin felt himself falter under the gaze. It was probably a good thing he stole Loki away from the Frost Giants, he mused, because that gaze was a weapon, damn it. With horror, he noticed that he was nodding and quickly jerked to a stop, but the damage was done.
Loki beamed further and looked at him with adoration. "That's great! Thank you so much, Father."
Well, Odin could probably get away with just pretending to use the horse, right? He didn't actually have to do it.
"I'll go tell mother all about this!" Loki yelled joyfully, dragging Svadilfari along as he left the room.
Shit. If Frigga knew, he would have to use the horse. He glared at Freyr.
"What?" the man asked innocently. "You agreed to it. Besides, you can retire the horse after a while, right?"
Freyr did have a point. Anyway, he was probably intimidating enough that he could make the horse look intimidating too, right? His intimidation affect had to be contagious right? Or else he'd just have to kill everyone who saw him riding the damn thing. Yes, that sounded like a good idea.
That still didn't solve the problem of Svadilfari, though. Only one thing to do: seek Frigga's advice and hope that she was feeling merciful enough to impart some.
Long story short, she wasn't. All she said was this, "I rather think they make a cute couple. I wouldn't even mind if they went official as a couple. Ah, if only Thor was as swift as his brother in getting a partner. I do so long for grandchildren."
So Odin was down an ally, but fear not, he wasn't the king of Asgard for nothing. Recalling that Loki had mentioned he was going to school with Svadilfari, he spoke with the Headmaster and had the boy transferred far, far away, in some remote school in Vanaheim. Now, the only thing left to do was to erase the traces of Svadilfari boy from the castle. The boy had stayed here with Loki for a few days, but no worries, after a cleansing ritual, all would be well again.
There, that solved one problem. Odin nodded in satisfaction as he walked through the halls. Suddenly he heard the voices of his sons.
"-so stupid! I'm so mad that Svadilfari is gone, Thor! He was stupid, yeah, but he knew a lot of obscure magic and a lot of the advanced magic since he's in a higher class than me, and as long I smiled prettily at him and complimented him every now and then, he'd teach me anything."
Odin blinked. What.
"Did he teach you how to fight?" came Thor's voice.
"Of course not. He didn't even exercise that often, you know! If he tried anything, I could've beaten him up easily, since I fight with you all the time."
"If he didn't know how to fight, he's stupid. You're better off without him."
"I know, but I'm still gonna miss my source of advanced magic."
What, Odin thought. Loki had been the one taking advantage of Svadilfari, not the other way around? His delicate, cute, mostly well behaved Loki? Impossible.
I'm just going to pretend I didn't hear that, he decided, somewhat disturbed.
This story will roughly have three to four chapters. I aim to finish it within a month, but I make no promises. This chapter was half written on my desktop for a while, so I decided to finish it and publish it. I'll edit and clean it up after it's done.
So a part of the fandom has the tendency to see the Odin-Loki relationship in a negative light, and I have that tendency as well. I used to write Odin's parenting as stupidly inept and terrible. But this time, I wanted to write Odin's parenting as hilariously inept and terrible instead, and thus this story was born.
****So I've been absent from the Thor/Avengers fandom for roughly three years I think, so I have no clue whether this has already been done or not. If you feel like it has, leave a link to the story in a review or PM and I'll check it out after I finish this story. If I feel like it's too similar to my story, I'll probably delete mine. If not, I'll let it stay.****
I won't ruin this story with gloomy stuff, if you're interested in knowing why I was absent for so long, just check my profile.
Will Thorsday be updated? I honestly don't know. I hope to update it, but it'll probably take a while.
Let me know if you spot any mistakes or anything.
thanks for reading,
~ketsui meraki
