yeah, really crappy summary, I know. The story's better then it sounds, I'm just bad at summaries lol.
uploaded on Idol FanFiction, but I figured I'd add it here too, in case I have readers on here that aren't on IFF:)
yup, it's another sad, dramatic story haha! like most of the stuff I write...hope you like it!!!

Chapter 1:

The tour was over. Everyone was going back home. I didn't want to though. I couldn't bare to go back to that life again. So much pain and misery. How could she go through that again? Everything was great on tour. Surrounded by all of her friends. Lil. Megan. Kris. Adam. Of course Adam. He had helped her through so much. He just didn't know it though.

Secrets.

Everything was a secret. Her life. Her past. No one knew what she went through. No one knew her suffering. The pain. The heartache. The tears. All were hidden with a smile. A smile and a little bit of make-up. And no one knew. No one could tell.

Lies.

Her whole life was a lie. Everything she did was a lie. How she felt. How she acted. It was all a charade. A mask. Covering up her true self. Her past. No one could know. It would ruin everything. Her life. Her career. It will all be over. It's not like it would go too far anyway. She wasn't as big as her friends. As big as Kris and Adam. They were going to make it far. She could tell. But her? Most people didn't seem interested. What a surprise.

Pain.

Her whole life was filled with pain. Physical and emotional. Every day it felt as if her heart was being ripped out of her chest. Over and over. The pain would flow throughout her entire body, making it hard just to make it through the day. Every day. Every day it seemed to get harder.

And now the tour was over. Now things would get worse. Back to the way they were before. Having to go through days where she just wish she'd die. The God would put her out of her misery. But no. Every day she managed to make it through. Somehow. It still kept getting worse though. Each and every day. But her life went on. God wanted her to suffer. Or at least it seemed that way.

Why?

That was the question she asked every day. Why her? Why not someone else? It's not like she would wish this much misery on someone else though. No. Never. That would just be cruel. She tried to be a good girl.. She tried to be obedient and clean. She wasn't THAT bad. Just a normal teenage girl. Sure, she made mistakes. But did she really deserve to suffer this much for them?

Cursed.

Yeah, that's what it seemed like sometimes. As if she was cursed. As if the world was against her. Damned to a everlasting world of pain, misery, and suffering. God was not with her it seemed. He didn't care anymore. He'd forgotten about little Allison Iraheta. She was under the devil. And he was unmerciful.

I sat there on the bench outside the arena on the side of the road, hugging my knees. Man, it was cold out. And dark. I looked up at the stars. Wow, this late already? Where were they? My parents. I scoffed at that. Mom and dad. I shouldn't relate to them as my 'parents.' They shouldn't be combined together. They were so different. Complete opposites. My mom shy and quiet. Barely spoke. It's not like she ever got the chance to though.

And my dad. I shuttered thinking about him. I didn't want to. It brought back too many horrible memories. Ones that now only she had to go through. She had no one. Her brother, Carlos Jr. moved out the first chance he got. All the way across the country. They hadn't spoken since. Her older sister did the same. She was alone.

A crash of thunder echoed through the sky. I looked up. Dark clouds now filled the sky. Covering the stars. I was in complete darkness. The rain started pouring down. I tried to pull my jacket over my head, wishing I had grabbed one with a hood. Or maybe an umbrella, or something. I shoved my bags under the bench so they wouldn't get too wet. I started to cry. They forgot. They don't care. As usual. I called them multiple times reminding them they needed to get me. But apparently I wasn't important enough. They never answered when I called anyway. It'd always go straight to voicemail.

Depression.

That's what I went through. That's what I battled day after day. Some days I'd slip under and let it take over me. It was in control. As it'd always been. Some days I could fight it though. Some days I overcame it. And I was actually happy. But not today. Definitely not today.

More tears started to fall. It's not like anyone could tell though. I was soaked basically to the skin. My make-up began running down my face. I wiped it away the best I could, only making it worse. Of course. I buried my head in my hands and let the tears fall freely. Praying that God would save me. Send me something. Anything. It didn't matter at this point. Just something to help ease the pain. Make the rain stop. Let her mom arrive. Take her far away from this place. Anything. Nothing came though. Instead, a truck sped by, going through a puddle formed in the road. Drenching her even more.

She started to sob. Was this how bad her life had become? Apparently so. She hugged her knees even tighter and buried her face in her knees, looking up every once and a while for her parents. Still nothing.

A car driving by slowly came to a halt on the side of the road. Right in front of her. She looked up and wiped her eyes again. The driver rolled down the passenger side window. She strained to see who it was through the pouring rain.

"Allie?" the person called. She immediately recognized the voice. Adam. She stood up and walked over to the window.

"What are you still doing here? Shouldn't you have left like, hours ago?" he asked.

Allison sniffled. "Yeah. I should have."

Adam gave her a look of pity. "Awww, I'm so sorry baby. Want me to wait here with you? You can come sit in my car if you want, and maybe warm up a bit. You look awfully pitiful right now."

Allison forced a laugh. "Yeah, okay." She opened the passenger door and climbed into Adam's car. She was so cold. Her teeth started chattering. Adam stepped out of the car and grabbed her bags, putting them in the back seat. After that was done, he sat back down in the driver's seat and put an arm around her, pulling her close. With his other hand he turned the heat on.

I coughed. "You know Adam, you don't have to do this. You probably have better places to be."

"Nah, not really. And besides, you REALLY think I'm going to send you back out there in this weather? You'll catch a cold. Well, if you haven't already..."I smiled. Leave it to Adam to be the one person that actually cared.

Adam pulled away for a minute, and began to take off his leather jacket. "No Adam..." I started. "You don't need to do that. I...I already have a jacket and all..."

"Yeah, and it's drenched. As is the rest of you. But for now the least you could do is put this on. Please? It'll make me feel better." I gave him a weak smile. He helped me take off my jacket and get into his. It was pretty big on me, the sleeves going down past my hands. But so warm. So, so warm. I snuggled down into it. Adam laughed. "See, isn't that better?"

I nodded and smiled. "Yeah. Thanks."

"So, why were you waiting out there in the rain? If you needed a ride, you know you could've asked me for one. We only live about 45 minutes apart," Adam said after about 15 minutes of silence.

"Yeah, well my mom or dad were supposedly going to come pick me up. But...I guess they forgot or something..." I said, looking down. "And my phone's dead, so I couldn't even call you...or anyone for a matter of fact."

"So you've been waiting there for like, hours?! And they still haven't come? Wow, that's bad parenting I'm sad to say. I might have to have a talk with them..."

"NO!" I said, quickly interrupting him. He gave me a weird look. "Relax Allie, I was joking..." he said, looking at me suspiciously, trying to read me and figure out why I reacted like that. That happened a lot. I knew Adam knew something was up. That something was wrong. He'd spent so many nights comforting me while I cried into his arms. He never questioned it. He never asked why. He just let me cry. Eventually I'd calm down, and we'd part. Then everything was forgotten. Or so I thought.

Shame.

I couldn't tell Adam the truth. What was really going on. More lies. More and more lies to cover up the painful truth. I couldn't even tell Adam, my best friend. Too much shame.

Finally about a half hour later my mom pulled up in her beat-up van. My mom. Thank God. Adam helped me with my bags and led me to the car. "Bye Allie. See you soon hopefully!" He kissed my forehead, causing me to turn a dark shade of red. He laughed and headed back to his car.