Disclaimer: Not mine. AtU belongs to Julie Taymor. "Golden Slumbers" and "Carry that Weight" belong to Lennon/McCartney. That's all.
A/N: "Golden Slumbers" is one of my favorite Beatles songs (and on Abbey Road, it leads into "Carry that Weight"), so I thought, "Why not put an AtU fic with it?" So enjoy.
Golden Slumbers (Carry that Weight)
Lucy was riding her bike home from school. It had been a long day and she was ready to get back to her room and take a nap. She turned her bike into the driveway, a little confused to see a black car in both her driveway, and the driveway next door, which belonged to her boyfriend Daniel and his family.
She looked up to see two servicemen standing on each of the porches, her own mother on her porch, and Daniel's on his. Looking from one to the other, Lucy's head began to spin. Then both mothers collapsed in tears.
In slow motion, Lucy watched two sets of dog tags fall to the ground, and she knew immediately that one set had Daniel's name, the other Max's. Unsure of what to do, she ran to her mother's side and held her, the two of them crying together.
Lucy woke with a start from her fitful sleep. She glanced over at her boyfriend Jude, who, at least for the moment was still sleeping soundly. Ever since her brother Max had gotten shipped off to Vietnam, she'd been having nightmares. Groaning, she left the warmth of the bed to get a glass of warm milk.
She walked into the kitchen, and found the milk in the fridge. She put some in a pan on the stove and warmed it up, pouring it into a coffee mug. She sipped it slowly, and thought of Max, wondering if her brother was safe. Was he OK? Would he make it home?
She shook those thoughts away. Thinking of Max in danger made it even worse, and she didn't know if she could deal with much more.
She rinsed out the mug and went back to bed, curling up close to Jude as much for comfort as for warmth. "What is it?" a sleepy Jude mumbled when he woke to an unusually clingy Lucy at his side.
"Nothing," Lucy said, trying desperately to avoid having Jude catch on to the trouble she was having sleeping. That would only worry him, and as it stood, he had enough worries trying to keep himself employed as an artist.
"I'll have none of that," Jude said, cuddling her close to him.
"None of what?" she asked, looking up at him.
"Lying," the young man stated simply, holding her to his chest. "You've had another nightmare, haven't you?" he asked, in a tone that made it impossible for the girl to lie to him.
Lucy nodded, and Jude gave her a comforting squeeze. "You've nothin' to worry about," he said, trying to convince himself just as much as he was trying to convince Lucy. "They won't get him," He hoped that it was true.
He could think of nothing to say or do to calm Lucy's fears. But he knew that rest couldn't hurt the situation. He remembered distinctly a lullaby his mother had often sung to him when he was a small child, and resting his chin on top of Lucy's head, he began to sing to her.
Once there was a way to get back homeward.
Once there was a way to get back home.
Sleep pretty darling, do not cry,
And I will sing a lullaby.
-
It seemed as if it had been ages since the night Jude sang Lucy back to sleep, but sometimes, the lullaby still came to mind as Lucy cared for her brother, back from war earlier than expected due to an injury.
Jude had been back to Liverpool, and had only recently returned, much to Lucy's surprise. After the way they'd ended before, she couldn't believe that he was back. A great deal of it was Max's doing, trying to give something back to the little sister who'd been his strength throughout his time in the hospital.
At last, things were all as they should be again. Jude was back in Lucy's life, though they weren't exactly back at a boyfriend/girlfriend status yet, Max was home, Prudence had again joined them in the apartment, and JoJo and Sadie were playing in the same band and sleeping in the same bed again. All seemed right in the world. Most of the time.
But then there were nights like this one, where Lucy heard her brother screaming from the next room, reliving God only knew what from Vietnam. She woke out of a deep sleep as if she'd only been dozing. She ran into Max's room, hoping to get there before someone else woke up. "Max, it's just me," she said, sitting down by the bed. "You're home… You're safe, Max!" she exclaimed, tears in her eyes. She couldn't imagine anything so horrible that it was still doing this to her brother so long after his time in the army.
Max looked at her through empty blue eyes. She reached out to stroke blonde hair out of his face, and shook her head. "Max, I promise, you're OK. We're at Sadie's."
Recognition finally showed in his eyes, and he pulled Lucy to him in a hug. "I'm sorry, Luce," he said, shaking his head. "I didn't mean to wake you up."
She shook her head. "No… No, it's OK." She lay down beside her brother in the bed, her arms still around him. "Are you OK?"
"Yeah," Max replied, attempting a reassuring big brother smile. "I'm fine. Just a bad dream."
Lucy shook her head. There had been far too many bad dreams. Holding her brother as a mother might hold a child, Lucy began to sing softly to him.
Golden slumbers fill your eyes.
Smiles awake you when you rise.
Sleep little darling, do not cry,
And I will sing a lullaby.
When Max finally drifted back off to sleep, Lucy tucked the blankets tight around him and walked away, careful not to wake him.
Making her way to the kitchen, Lucy sighed, looking for whatever alcohol was available.
A soft voice in an unmistakable Liverpudlian accent startled Lucy just a little. "Looking for this, are ya?"
"Jude, you scared me," she gasped, glad that she hadn't screamed and woken the whole apartment.
"Sorry," Jude said, sheepishly, holding out the bottle of Jack Daniels he'd just poured from. His eyebrows raised in question, he wasn't surprised when Lucy took the bottle from him, grabbing a glass from a cabinet.
The blonde sat down at the table, eyes weak. She was so tired. But she'd never slept well after having Max wake her up like that. She poured both her and Jude a rather large helping of the whiskey, and raised her glass to his. "Cheers," he said softly.
They each downed the liquid quickly and put their glasses down. She reached for the bottle again, and Jude caught her wrist. "I think that's enough, inn'it?" he said, knowing that Lucy didn't need to drink more. It could only hurt.
"Jude, I'm fine," she said, trying to free herself from him.
"I think we should both go to bed," he said, looking her in the eyes. He was right. She knew it. She needed sleep more than she needed that bottle. But she didn't understand why Jude could drink, but she couldn't.
She glared at him as he stood up, still holding her wrist. "I'll decide when I need to go to bed," she said angrily.
"Lucy," he replied. He could think of nothing else to say.
She stood up, having little other choice given his grip on her arm. Something in his eyes broke Lucy's heart. "Oh, God, Jude," she said, beginning to cry as she stood there. Jude put his arms around her, hoping that, if nothing else, he could comfort a hurting friend.
She leaned her head against his chest as he held her. "It's all right," he said, stroking her hair. "Max's home, we're all here… Everything's OK, now."
"No, Jude… Nothing's OK…" She shook her head. "This damn war is still happening, and people are still dying… And Max is all messed up in the head, and there's nothing I can do about it. Not a damn thing!"
With that burst of words, Lucy was slightly out of breath. She leaned into Jude's chest and began to sob.
Knowing that there was nothing else he could do, Jude lifted Lucy into his arms and carried her into her room, laying her gently in her bed. "Goodnight, Lucy," he said.
"Jude," she said, grasping his arm. "Don't leave me."
Looking at her, surprised, Jude nodded. "OK."
He lay down beside her on the bed, and she moved close to him. "Jude," she whispered softly. "Remember the song you sang me before you left?" she asked, looking up at him.
The young man nodded. "Of course I do," he said. "Me mother used to sing it to me when I was a lad."
Lucy smiled just a little then, thinking of Jude as a little boy being sung to by his mother.
"Why d'ya ask?" he asked her, stroking her hair back.
"Sing it to me again?" she asked, closing her eyes. She needed to hear the song with Jude's soothing voice behind it, calming her as it had what seemed like forever ago.
Jude nodded, pulling her close to his chest.
Once there was a way to get back homeward.
Once there was a way to get back home.
Sleep pretty darling, do not cry,
And I will sing a lullaby.
-
Max woke up again, later in the night, but this time it wasn't a nightmare. Just a lot of tossing and turning. He didn't want to wake Lucy, so he went into the living room quietly and turned on the TV, hoping he'd find something other than more war coverage. He plopped down on the couch after finding something on the TV, though he wasn't really sure what it was.
"Can't sleep?" came JoJo's voice from the other side of the living room.
Max jumped. He hadn't know that anyone was there. "Shit, man, you scared me."
JoJo grinned. "Sorry." He looked at his younger friend. "You OK?"
Max shrugged. "I don't know, JoJo. I mean, I thought I'd be OK by now, but I'm not. I'm still having the nightmares sometimes, wakin' Lucy up at all hours of the night…" He looked at the other man, knowing that he'd done his time in the service too. "Does it ever go away?" he asked, blue eyes pleading with JoJo to give him some hope.
"Not completely," he said. "But it'll get better. I mean, it's already better than when you first got back."
He nodded. "Yeah." It was true.
"Hey, thanks, JoJo," he said, standing up. He was beginning to get sleepy again. "I'm gonna go to bed."
JoJo nodded. Catching Max's eye, he said, "It will get better, man. I swear."
And as Max walked away, JoJo softly added, "But…
Boy, you're gonna carry that weight,
Carry that weight a long time.
Boy, you're gonna carry that weight,
Carry that weight a long time."
