I Promise I'll Return

Like many people, I don't remember the things that happened to me when I was a young child. I don't even have any memories of my father before he left.

Oh please excuse me. Allow me to correct that. Before he died.

Normally, if one tries really hard, people remember maybe a face of what someone looked like or maybe even a warm touch. I don't remember anything like that. The only way I would know what he looked like would be the pictures my mom would have of him – from the time when they first met in junior high to all the times after that till I was a baby. But that's about it. I only see the pictures and when I asked mom about him once, she would look so greatly saddened that I thought she was going to break down right in front of me.

After that, I never asked about him again. But there is one bit of information I have about him; besides the fact that his name was Aoyama Masaya.

When I was five years old, he was murdered. The killer was never found and it happened when I was in the house with him. People say that the trauma must have been so great that I just completely blocked it out of my memory as a sort of defense mechanism. Sounds logical, however when they tell me that his grave is in Japan, I didn't believe them.

I said that I didn't remember the face or the touch of my father but for some apparent reason, I remember one distinct thing about him. My father didn't die. He left us, and I remember distinctly his last words to my mom before she cried her heart out.

"You know something…you're very cruel right now, koneko-chan."

Ch. 1: It Started with a Funeral

-Men are undependable.-

Rain is pouring down from the heavens. How coincidental, since today is the day of Momomiya Shintaro's funeral. Family and friends crowd around his grave – with a picture of him in front of his contained ashes and piles of lilies all around him. Everyone is wearing black and not one person has a happy smile on their faces. Just grief and sympathy for Shintaro's pour wife and family.

Even his daughter, the widow Aoyama Ichigo, returned from England to come to this funeral, and his 16-year old daughter, Aoyama Ruka.

-They're arrogant, oblivious to another's feelings, and they make you so dependent on them only to disappoint you later. In the end, it's always the men who leave first.-

While Momomiya Sakura is still crying for the loss of her husband, Ichigo tries to remain strong. She has shed her tears for her father and right now, she's trying not to shed even more for him. Someone needs to be strong for her mother. As for Ruka, well she hardly remembers her grandfather. She's lived in England since she was a little girl and now here she is, in Japan; under a big black umbrella, holding it while her mom comforts her grandmother. In a black dress, with white lace as trimming to the heart-shape collar, it shows the curves of her body rather nicely. A small chest but smaller waist are well-defined but at the hips, the skirt is loose and rests lightly against her long legs until an inch past the knees. The sleeves are tight from the shoulder to the elbow and then they enlarge with the same white lace trimmings. For feet, she wears long white socks that are two inches below her knee and black three-inch heels. Interesting shoes to wear considering that she's standing in the mud and every now and then, her heel would sink. But Ruka just doesn't seem to mind it. She would just shift and she'll be fine. So long as she can still protect the heads of the women in her family from the rain. Like them, she has red hair but it's a darker shade compared to her mom and her grandmother. It's also short, like a red halo above her shoulders but the bangs on the side of her face are longer than the rest. Four inches pass her shoulders to be exact and unlike her mother and grandmother, she has blue eyes. Light, bright blue eyes. Eyes that can be considered freaky at first sight, especially on her pale white skin face. Actually, her entire skin tone is pale white like she's never seen the sun before. Don't be disappointed when you ask her and she'll tell you that she knows how the sun feels on the skin and the burning sensation of blindness from the sunlight in the eyes. She's had those experiences. Her skin tone is just stubborn. That's all.

Not that Ruka really cares anyhow.

-Sure they can swear their undying love to you but in the end, they'll be gone. One way or the other. Go ahead and give them the excuse that some things couldn't be helped and the only option left was to leave. It's not acceptable to the pain caused from their departure. If they truly meant to stay with you forever, why couldn't they try harder? Why did they just give up and leave?-

-That is why I've always thought that it's better to live without them. Don't depend on them and don't ask of any sort of favors for them. Why go through the whole trouble when it's just going to cause you grief and heartache later?-

As the funeral is about to come to reach its end, Ruka can only hold these bitter thoughts as she stares at the lilies a moment longer before peaking at the women beside her. Sakura still being a sobbing mess after the multiple days that passed since her husband's stroke, and Ichigo still rubbing her arm while trying to remain as strong as she can for her. It can easily be seen that she wants to cry just as much as her mother but no. Scanning her light blue eyes across the rest of the crowd, every single one of them have similar faces to the person standing next to them. Of course, Ruka hardly knows anyone but that's not the point.

All this pain for the loss of one man. It's their fault anyway. They let him get too close to their hearts.

The heart…

Placing a hand over her own, Ruka closes her eyes for a moment.

-It's cold. Cold and hard…-

-It is said that the heart is the source of all compassion, kindness, and love. But I don't feel it. I can say words to show sympathy for another's pain but they would only be empty. I have no compassion, no kindness, nor love to feel and share full-heartedly.-

-But there is also something else about the heart. They remember the memories that surround those feelings. At least, the memories that are supposed to be important to the heart above all else. That's probably why I remember my father's last words. But there's one more thing I remember from long ago.-

"I'll come back. I promise you, hana-chan! My papa can't control my life forever! Once I'm old enough, I'll do whatever it takes to get back to you! Rather I would have to fight my papa or the world, I promise I'll return."

-Funny that is all my heart is willing to remember of that moment. I don't even know who said it, nor the face of that person. Could something honestly be that important but not have any more supporting details?-

-Then what is the point?-

At last the funeral ended. Before anyone took their leave to go on with their daily lives, they spoke their last bit of condolences to the departed's family before then. Sakura had finally stopped sobbing to at least thank the people who came today and that gave Ichigo the chance to distract herself from crying her eyes out. Ruka still just stood there, holding the umbrella and spoke when spoken to. To be honest, a lot of people are nervous to talk to her. Is it because of the way she looks with her eyes showing no troubled feelings of this funeral, or how she looks like a closed book while her mother and grandmother are open?

Or maybe because she spent the last twelve years of her life living in England so she doesn't know how to communicate?

As some of the last bits of people speak to the widow Momomiya and the Aoyamas, Sakura notices something from the corner of her eyes. Something that turns her head slightly and then smile full-heartedly for the first time today.

"Ichigo dear," she calls.

As the last person to say 'Sorry for your loss' leaves and nods his head to Ruka, who nods back as courtesy, Ichigo responds, "Yes?"

Motioning her head to the side, the younger red-head woman looks up and she gasps in shock of what she sees. She could hardly believe her eyes but none the less, she can see them as clear as day and they are really here. "Everyone?"

Upon hearing her, Ruka turns to look and her expression hardly changes when she sees the huge crowd of people staring at them with welcoming eyes and gentle smiles – the adults at least. Six adults and four children; the oldest probably around fifteen or so. All of them are wearing black clothing in respect and they're all formally dressed. Together, there are four males and six females; two adult males and two children males. With how the men have a hand on a woman's shoulder or is just standing really close to her, Ruka can immediately tell that the short blonde hair man is married to the two bun-hair woman of class, while the tall long hair brunette is married to the strikingly beautiful woman Ruka recognizes seeing in magazines and commercials. Analyzing the young with the grown-ups, Ruka can presume who is whose child. What she can also notice is the two younger ones, a boy and girl whom appear 12 or 13-years old, have mothers but there are no fathers to stand beside them. The women have wedding rings so then, where are they? Could they not make it because they have something better to do? Are they nearby but decide to give their wives some privacy with Ichigo?

Or are they dead too?

"It's been a while, Ichigo-san," the brunette man greets.

The blonde corrects, "Twelve years to be exact. What? Love England too much to leave?"

At least the brunette has some grace in his voice but that tan, blonde man is a little more…oh what's the word…crude? Or is that too harsh? Maybe 'cocky' but not completely…

"You can go greet them, Ichigo."

Turning to Sakura, she also adds, "It's been a while since the last time you saw them, hasn't it? And Ruka, you should say hello, too. You don't remember but you have met them before."

Figures. "But grandmother-"

"Don't worry, dear. I have a spare in case something like this was to happen." Going to her purse, Sakura proves her point when she takes out a small clear umbrella. Well now it looks like they have no choice.

Carrying the giant umbrella, Ichigo and Ruka make their way to the group. As soon as they left, Sakura opens her own and watches her daughter and granddaughter about to have their long-lost, heart-to-heart reunion. She's unable to watch the whole thing, however. Another visitor comes to her and Sakura's attention is turned to them, thanking them for coming and for their condolences.

Casually approaching them, which is rather uncharacteristic for those who knew the past Ichigo, she doesn't take another step further than a few feet from these group of people. She's nervous, and who wouldn't be when you haven't seen your long-time friends for more than a decade? With her daughter by her side, Ichigo takes a deep breath and mentally prepares herself as she greets, "Everyone, thank you for coming today. It means a lot to us." Then she bows and Ruka does the same.

"Of course we'd come, Ichigo," the dazzling gorgeous Zakuro Akasaka tells her.

Adding in the details, the woman with the big round glasses says with a soft, gentle smile, "We knew when you'd come back to Japan, things would be too busy for you to visit so we decided to come to you, Ichigo-san."

To say that Ichigo was touched when she heard the words of her dear friend would be an understatement – compared to the shock realization she felt inside. She dared not give that away but her body tensed none the less and someone noticed.

Standing back up, Ichigo tries to look silly-forgetful as she says, "Please forgive me. I'll be sure to come and visit you as soon as everything has settled down for us."

Then the woman with black Chinese attire takes the big risk of running out in the rain and hugging Ichigo as if she were a little kid. "Ichigo onee-chan, it's so good to see you again, na no da!"

Ichigo didn't expect this, even though it really shouldn't be since she knows her, but all the same, Ruka sees how greatly surprise her mom looks. That finally pushed her. In no time at all, tears appear in Ichigo's chocolate brown eyes and she hugs the woman back. "It's good to see you too…Pudding!"

The woman called Pudding wasn't the only one to hug Ichigo. First it was the woman with the glasses, then the two-bun woman, and finally the model. They all approach Ruka's mom and hug her, some with tears in their eyes and others with just joyful smiles. Ichigo called them by names but all Ruka was concerned about is if the umbrella she's holding can still shield her while her mom is having such a joyful reunion. The men stand in the background watching these women hugging and crying, and Ruka looks down at the watch on her wrist.

'It's almost time for the dinner reception.' Looking at her mom to tell her, she decides against it. So she looks to the side to wait until they were done and she notices that the rain has stopped. She checks to be sure and up in the sky, the sun is peaking through the grey clouds. How coincidental again. 'Is the heaven's trying to be funny?' she wonders.

Folding the umbrella away, Ruka stands where she is on the side and waits.

-I never really given much thought to how my story would start. But I suppose if I have to be honest, it started when I returned to Japan to attend my grandfather's funeral. After all, it was at the funeral when I met these people and later, it was by fate that I would soon meet HIM.-

"…I promise you, hana-chan!..."

-The true identity of the one who made that pitiful promise.-


Ruka – "blue flower"

Hana-chan – "flower"-chan

Kanon – "flower sound"