October, 2009

I walked through the entrance of the coffee shop, the bell ringing above me. You were sat near the window, sipping your coffee and writing in a journal. You are always sat in the same place every time I come at my lunch break. I always wondered what you were writing, was it for university or your job?

I made my way to the counter, the same girl behind it, same name tag (labeled: Jenny), and same toothy grin shining. She recognizes me; my tinted grey suit, brief case in hand and black messy hair flowing over my eyes. She greets me with a soft 'Good afternoon, Phil' and I nod in response and order my usual. She promises me it'll be ready in a few and I leave to sit at my usual place; diagonal from where you're sitting, far from the window but close to the entrance.

It's been like this for 2 weeks. I arrive here for my break, you're already sat in your normal spot when I enter. We sit diagonal from each other, myself throwing occasional glances in your direction and you not noticing my presence.

November 1st. The day our routine changed. You didn't arrive before me. I entered the shop, like usual, and did my normal routine. You were running late, I suppose. You walked into the entrance with rosy cheeks and hair all over the place. You glanced in my direction, catching my gaze and your cheeks turning a darker shade of red. You turn to sit in your spot but someone already took the empty booth. I watch as you run your hand through your brown, curly hair and you glance at me again. You strolled to the vacant chair across from me. I look down at my half-cold coffee while you clear your throat and say,

"Um, is anyone sitting here?"

I shake my head and you settle in the not-so-comfortable-like-your-usual-spot chair. We sat in awkward silence until my break was over and I coughed out an 'I need to go, see ya!' and rushed out. I had noticed you didn't once write in the journal, like you usually do. And I couldn't help but notice the flicker of disappointed written on your face when I left.

I don't go to coffee shop for a week. My boss flooded me with paperwork and I couldn't really say no. The next time I make a stop for coffee, you're there, in the seat across from mine. You're drinking coffee with shaky hands and you're constantly looking around, almost like you're looking for someone, or waiting. I enter, hearing the familiar ding above me, and you turn your head in my direction. You smile and I settle in my usual seat, now across from you. We don't really say anything, you glance over my features while I place my case on the floor. You're the first to break the silence.

"Haven't seen you in a few days."

I stared at you, have you been coming here every day, waiting for me? I run my hand through my hair, attempting to fix it, but mostly to cover the pink shade rising on my cheeks. I decide to not answer your statement, there's no way you've been waiting for me, for Phil, the nerdy kid who works in a quiet corner at his job and actually likes doing paperwork. Or Phil, who, up until 11th grade, thought making out was where you just touch tongues, not mouths and tongues.

You awkwardly cleared your throat and gulped your coffee down so fast, it probably burned your tongue but you didn't show any emotion.

"Do you talk?"

You sighed, placing your empty coffee cup on the table and rummaging through your bag for something. I was nervous, should I talk? Was I being a jerk for not responding? You took out the journal I would normally see you writing in. You wrote a few digits down, tearing it out and handing it to me.

"Here's my number. I like you."

You smiled, which caused your dimples to appear. I've never seen your dimples before, well I've never seen you smile properly. I slowly took the sheet and folded it, tucking it into my pant pocket. I'm not going to lie, you was gorgeous and you had liked me. You checked your phone and your grin disappeared. I watched you stand, grabbing your bag and turning towards me,

"Call me, okay?"

You smile slightly and exit the shop. I watched as you strolled down the pavement, a small grin on your face.

I did call you but I got nervous so I hung up before it got to the second ring. I mentally kicked myself, a cute boy wants to get to know me and I'm being so stupid. Call him. Call him. Call him, Phil.

I called again and after three rings, you answered. "Hello?" My throat closed up and it felt like someone was choking me. I couldn't breathe.

"Hello?" You repeated.

I brought my hand up to my ear and tugged, a habit I've always had since I was a child. My mum told me I always tugged on my ear when I was nervous or scared. "…Hi." I could basically hear the smile in your voice when you said, "You're the cute boy from the coffee shop, right?"

I nodded but remembered we're on the phone, "…Yes?" It sounded more like a question, there were cuter boys there, and you could've given your number to any of them as well.

"Well, what's your name, cutie? I'm Dan. Sorry I didn't introduce myself sooner, I was a bit nervous."

Dan. I like it, it suits you. I like Dan. "My name's Phil."

"Well, Phil, you're really cute and I've been watching you for the past few weeks and I hope that doesn't sound creepy- oh god, it sounded creepy, I wasn't watching you inthat way- you just caught my eye and I wanted to meet so I waited but you didn't come so I was disappointed but I do want to continue seeing you- I don't even know what I'm saying. You're really fucking gorgeous, okay?"

I giggled silently and the pink shade appeared on my cheeks again. "Oh, um, I have to go but we're going to meet at the usual place, right?" I grinned and basically screamed 'yes' and we said our goodbyes.

I entered the familiar coffee shop but this time you were waiting for me with a wide grin on your face, two coffees already on the table, and a little sticky-note on your cup, and it wrote: 'You and Phil make a cute couple'. Yeah, I think so to.