March 26, 1996

Tucked away in the corner of northwest Oregon, just south of the mighty Columbia River, a small barn sits hidden in the quiet hills of the fertile farmland that the river has carved out over millennia. In the barn, all is quiet. It is early in the morning, very early; no one has woken. Yet one mare is restless in her stall.

She does not know what is happening. For the past eleven months things have been happening inside her that she can't make sense of. Her flanks have become distended and she feels things move deep inside her. Just within the last few weeks, the Humans have moved her to a large stall with a deep straw bed for no apparent reason.

But tonight, many things are happening very quickly. She walks around the stall, looking at the bedding and her untouched evening feed and the water. She does not know why, but it is very important that everything be warm, clean, and in order. As she rustles through the bedding, building up a thick spot, she notices that something else is happening now. Her insides hurt; they feel like that moment of breathlessness when the girth is pulled too tight too fast, but now this feeling is not only for a moment; it comes in waves and stays for a few minutes at a time. She cannot think of anything but the pain. She sweats and paces in her stall, unaware of anything else in the world. Trying to find a comfortable position, she lies down, but this only puts more pressure on her belly. She gets back up, but now the weight of whatever is inside her is unsupported. She grows more distressed and frightened by the minute.

Soon, she cannot control herself. The waves of pain are so close together and so intense that she must lay down. She is flat on her side, and the waves are moving something, that thing which is deep inside her. Her whole body pushes against the mass. Within a few minutes, it is all over, and now she knows what it was all for, as she looks at the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.

The little brown and white filly is as confused as her mother was before all this happened. Only moments before, she had been warm and secure, floating in sweet ignorance. Now she is cold and wet, lying on the ground. The rising sun casts light onto her eyes which had hence known only darkness. But then, she hears her mother nicker softly to her from only a few feet away. She calls back, comforted by the presence of her. The little filly knows Mother will keep her safe and warm. It takes her several tries, but finally she stands and makes it the few steps to Mother's flank, where she takes full advantage of the meal she finds there.

March 27, 1996

The previous day had dawned warm and sunny, but by nightfall, the southwest winds had brought in the ominous cloud cover that always meant rain. Now, at noon, the rains still persisted, drenching the little school that stood in the rural heart of the Willamette Valley in the typical spring rains that came every year. Sitting at her desk in the school, a little girl stared out of the window while eating lunch. Megan had hoped it would stay sunny, like it had been yesterday, but she knew that was a feeble hope this time of year; somewhat like hoping for a snowy Fourth of July.

Yesterday had been a good day, despite the fact that it was Tuesday. Megan had learned that most people thought Monday was the worst day of the week, but her opinion Monday was not nearly so bad as Tuesday. Monday, she could run on the extra sleep she squeezed in on the weekends, she could remember all the good and fun things she did on the weekend, and there was never any homework due on Monday. But Tuesday was different. Tuesday there was never any extra sleep to run on; it was all used for Monday. Her teacher always gave homework on Tuesday, and there was still Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday to get through before the next weekend. Worst of all, she had piano lessons on Tuesday. Megan hated piano lessons. She could think of few things that were more boring and mind numbing than sitting on a bench looking at a bunch of notes on paper that barely made sense.

Despite all this, yesterday had been a pretty good day. She did not have any homework, so she knew she would have time to play in the sun before her mother came to pick her up for her piano lesson. Then, once Mother came home, she told Megan that her piano instructor was ill, and would not be able to teach lessons that day. So Megan spent the afternoon gallivanting outside in the spring grass and sunshine. When she was sitting in the front lawn, playing with a caterpillar in the garden, she looked over to the small horse barn just across the street. Someone was over there riding their horse in the good weather. As she watched, a deep sense of longing rose within Megan. She loved horses more than anything in the world. She thought they were creatures of such beauty that none of God's other creations could match their stunning elegance. She had asked her parents countless times to get a horse, but they always said "no".

That did not make sense to Megan; her family had the pasture for a horse, and it was already fenced off, with a little barn just big enough for a horse to be nice and cozy in the winter. As she watched the horse canter around the barn across the street, she though of how beautiful it would be to ride her own horse through her fields at home.

Since she had watched that horse across the street she had great difficulty focusing on anything else. Megan had heard her teacher's reprimands several times already that day:

"…The reason why we have different punctuation is to help us know what is meant…" she heard her teacher drone on.

This is so boring, I already know this. Do I even have to turn in my sentences? Maybe I could just prove to the whole class that I am smarter than them, then I wouldn't have to come to school anymore…then I could just get a horse and ride away…

"Megan, MEGAN!" Megan jumped in her chair as she was startled from her daydream. "What are you doing?" Her teacher asked.

"I was just thinking of…I was just…just…" She replied halfheartedly. Megan heard some of her classmates snigger .

"'Just thinking' of what?...The only thing I asked you to think about was this sentence drill, so focus!" Her teacher retorted. Those of her classmates who did not laugh before found this to be very laughable. Megan just sat and looked down at her desk, trying to ignore everyone else in the room.

But the scene of horse and rider melding into one to do each other's will was more than she could block from her mind. Now, as she stacked her empty lunch tray on the cafeteria cart, she looked out of the rain-washed window once more. It was still coming down in torrents; she knew they would not be allowed to play outside during recess. This prospect made her feel even gloomier. Though the school was small, she did not have any real friends, and she knew the other children would just team up without her and take all the good board games. She was only seven years old, but she was very intelligent for her age. Yet she did not make friends easily, and she had a hard time understanding other people or why they did certain things. She would say exactly what she was thinking without understanding how it made other people feel, and this made the other children think she was very strange, so she just played by herself much of the time. As she stayed behind in the classroom catching up on her morning lessons the other children were running off to the gym. She seriously considered making Wednesday her new least-favorite day of the week.

October 2, 1996

The little brown and white filly had a name. It was much like her sire's name. In fact, only three letters at the end of her name made it different from that of her sire's. Vegas Gold Star was the name given to her sire. Vegas GoldStarlit was the name given to the filly. The Humans didn't speak to her or call her by her name much though. For what seemed like a blissful forever, Vegas GoldStarlit had been with Mother, dependent on her for everything. Mother was a good mother, too. She always had warm, sweet milk for Vegas GoldStarlit, she nuzzled and nickered to her when she needed comforting or reassuring, and she let Vegas GoldStarlit have her freedom when she wanted to run and play; Mother would even run and play with her sometimes. The only time Vegas GoldStarlit thought about The Humans was when they brought The Magic or The Torture.

The Magic and The Torture were two very different things. The Magic was a substance, a heavenly, beautiful, delicious thing. Vegas GoldStarlit learned that The Humans referred to it by two different names, depending on the time of day. In the morning, it was called "breakfast" and in the evening it was called "dinner". She dined on The Magic twice a day with Mother. It was always the same thing, but she didn't mind. The light, oblong golden-brown grains were always just as delicious from one day to the next. The other thing that came with Breakfast or Dinner was not nearly as exciting as those delicious little grains; Vegas GoldStarlit thought it tasted suspiciously like dead grass. The Magic was so good, that she wondered how The Humans, so consistent in everything they did, could bring something so radically different as The Torture. The Torture was end-all good-mood Magic Killer for Vegas GoldStarlit. The Humans called it "breaking", but the only thing Vegas GoldStarlit thought they could possibly be trying to break was her neck, or her legs. How could any horse move at all with such a contraption strapped to her head as The Halter, with one of The Humans pulling on The Lead Rope like their very lives depended on the fact that Vegas GoldStarlit follow them?

This routine of The Magic and The Torture continued for several months, always with Mother close by. But one day, the routine – in fact, her whole life was torn asunder. That fine, late summer day, Vegas GoldStarlit and Mother were enjoying a mid-morning nap under the shade of a great oak tree in the big pasture by the pond. Though it was still early, it was already hot. As they lay sleeping, Vegas GoldStarlit heard the voice of one of The Humans calling for them. Mother, always faithful to The Humans, rose from her slumber and encouraged her child to follow her to the pasture gate, where one of The Humans stood with a halter in hand. Vegas GoldStarlit thought it was strange that The Human only had a halter for Mother in his hand; although in the early days Vegas GoldStarlit just followed Mother wherever she went, these days The Humans always put a halter on both whenever they were moved. It was all the same to Vegas GoldStarlit though; she had no plans on being far from Mother. As The Human led Mother through the gate, Vegas GoldStarlit made to follow her, but The Human closed the gate before she could make it through.

Vegas GoldStarlit did not like this at all. She had been away from Mother before, but only when The Humans had taken her away from Mother, never when Mother was taken from her. She began to panic as Mother grew farther away. She called to her frantically, begging her to break free from The Human and just come back to her. Mother whinnied back to her, almost as panicked. As Vegas GoldStarlit ran up and down the fence line, Mother's whinnies grew fainter, but Vegas GoldStarlit didn't stop calling, not even when another Human came and took her to a stall in the small barn about a quarter mile from the main barn, on the far side of the pond behind the hay barn. Here she continued to pace around the stall, calling for Mother until finally, sometime after sunset, she fell into an exhausted, lonely sleep.

Vegas GoldStarlit never saw Mother again after that day. The Humans kept her in the small barn, letting her out of the stall into a small paddock for a few hours each day. They would come to bring The Magic twice a day, but for Vegas GoldStarlit, it was no longer Magic; the pain of being taken so suddenly from Mother had turned into a dull ache of loneliness, for there was never anyone else to keep her company, or to show her that they cared. It was just Vegas GoldStarlit.

When The Humans came, they would throw copious amounts of food to her. When they would talk to each other, or to her, Vegas GoldStarlit picked up on one word that was used over and over again. She did not know what Auction was, but she knew that she was going to Auction, whatever it was. Vegas GoldStarlit did not really care; anything had to be better than living day after day in the small barn all alone.

As the day of Auction grew closer though, Vegas GoldStarlit began to think that perhaps Auction was not better than the life she had. The way The Humans spoke of it, Vegas GoldStarlit began to surmise that Auction was not often the first choice of Humans. If The Humans were so afraid of Auction, Vegas GoldStarlit began to grow afraid of what Auction might actually be. She wished that she could just leave the barn, and the paddock, and the whole property, to be free from the loneliness for the rest of her life. She never imagined that wish would come in the form of a Human named Kate.

Kate came to look at Vegas GoldStarlit a few days before she was to go to Auction. "Hello little one, my name is Kate, and I'm going to call you Vegas, just Vegas." She said as she walked into the stall. Vegas backed herself away from Kate, always keeping her eyes on her. Vegas had learned enough about Humans in her short life to not trust them, especially new ones. "It's okay baby, I won't hurt you, I just want to pet you…" Kate crooned softly to the filly. Vegas moved suspiciously forward to investigate The New Human.

Kate gradually moved to Vegas's side and started stroking her little neck, and caressing her muzzle. As she did this, something inside Vegas's memory stirred. It was something from when she was very young. She had not felt this kind of comforting and security in such a long time that she had forgotten how it felt, but now, as Kate stood above Vegas, speaking softly to her, she knew she could trust Kate, for the rest of her life.