Love is not kind. It is selfish and toxic. They said when you fall in love, it feels like flying – your body, your soul, they feel so light and there's a comfortable warmth constantly growing inside; where your heart flutters and suddenly all you see is him. This kind of love is a fairy tale. Love that ends with a happy ever after, love that starts with a once upon a time and once there was a princess and a prince – love like these do not exist.
Love is not kind. It is selfish and toxic. And I've watched you, watched your back and swore that I would never have to ever again. But I still do. Your back is the only view I'm familiar with – cold, distant, and condescending.
I loved you, I still do, and how pathetic is that?
I screamed words of love, words of promise of a tomorrow where everything will be okay. Where I'll walk with you, hand in hand, and help you rid of the darkness eating you alive. Because I'm also here, it's not just Naruto. I'm here.
But that doesn't matter, does it, Sasuke-kun? He's all that matters. That's why you killed me, and you made time for him. Because he needs to know why you're doing what you're doing and I'm not important enough to know.
My boys, so precious and distant. My boys, so lovely and cold. My boys, you were never here. Always walking away, too fast and with no hesitation.
I screamed words of love, words of promise of a tomorrow where everything will be okay. And you greeted me with a hand in my heart. Quite literally, too.
It's an illusion, I know that, when I opened my eyes – crying, hurting, and betrayed. Looking over at Kakashi- sensei, who could only smile apathetically from behind his mask; the mask that will always create a safe sanctuary for him and him alone. Far from everything else, from the pain, from the emotions, and from reality. Always hiding, forever hiding.
And my boys, so precious and distant, busy fighting for reasons unknown. So I sit there, on the ground where nothing is steady. I sit there and I could picture you, Sasuke-kun – my darling, lovely, lonely Sasuke-kun, killing me. Again and again.
Your hand in my heart, through my body. Piercing me, hurting me, killing me.
Again and again and again and –
It must be an eternity before I stopped hurting – that one thousandth time that you pierce my body, your eyes so cold and uncaring, and your face showing no sign of remorse. That's when I knew:
That love is not kind. Love is not fair and love is not always happy. I knew yet here I am, hoping you'd come back alive, so that I could spill my heart all over again. Embarrass myself, making a joke out of myself in front of everyone I so want to impress. Years of training turns to nothing before you.
Because that's what you do to me, Sasuke-kun. You annihilate. Your darkness sucks everything and everyone in, including me. And I envy Naruto, because he's the only one who can save you. I've been so delusional, thinking it could be me, but it will never be me. It will always be him.
Because he matter, and I don't.
Because love is not kind, it is selfish and toxic. And this is our love story; my love story.
Once upon a time there was a girl and a boy. The end.
What is our story, Sasuke-kun? That's all we have. A beginning and an ending. With nothing in between.
a/n |
to be honest I think sakura should just leave sasuke. I hate it when she confessed all over again cause it makes her seem so pathetic. I really dislike that sakura, and she's my bae, so it killed me to see her do what she did. ergh.
anyway, reviews are appreciated,
dd.
