Alan and Denny reminisce (slash)

One day when their marriage was just about 10 years old, Denny turned to Alan and wondered about the evening when Alan had accepted Denny's offer of marriage, and he said to him, "Do you remember the evening when we were on the balcony of C., P., and Schmidt when you finally accepted my proposal of marriage?"

"Oh, yes!" Alan confirmed. "What a joyous time to remember!"

"And now that I have purposely taken the time to know poor people, I really do like some of them, our chaffuer, our maid,"

"And others we don't even own, right?"

"Right!"

"I could never understand why you fought it so hard!"

"I can only think I didn't know how much fun it might be! No, that's not right, I thought it would ruin what we had...I could only see one fight after another about sex!"

"Well, it hasn't been that way, has it?"

"No, even if it is about not having sex with each other at all."

"Would you have it some other way?"

"Well, there have been times when I thought that some alternative was possible..."

"I always knew you were...'different' "

"If you really thought that, has there been no time when you thought it might be fun to try and accommodate me?"

"I'm not gay or even bi, Alan, you know that by now..."

"Oh, yes I do,if not before, then at least since we married..."

"What does that mean?"

"Exactly what I said. If I ever had any hope of your possibly eventually wanting to try anything, I have long since despaired of that, anything more than a hand job!"

"If you did, certainly would let me know, wouldn't you?"

"Would it make any difference?"

"Well, it would make a difference to our relationship, wouldn't it? Alan do you remember that I was careful to make sure we were alone when I asked you to marry me?"

"I thought that was just because you wanted to make sure that no one would accuse

you of wanting me!"

"Well, that true of course! But I thought this out carefully, Alan! I couldn't have stood it if you told me no in front everyone! I so wanted you, that I might have to have sex with you..."

"And so...?"

"I just wanted you to know that I had considered it before you ever brought it up! Remember that during the ceremony, I told you that I had never been more serious about anything in my life?"

"Yes, I remember that I asked you that because when Judge Alito asked us if we took you two as our spouse's you had just taken Shirley's hand instead of mine!"

"Well, being the feeling man than he was, he could sense the love in the air. And since he could sense my love for Shirley, he mistook it as for my love for you, naturally. Since Shirley was so much more naturally beautiful and desirable than you!" Depending on the natural inclination of the natural man in Alito. Not theun-natural attraction of the unatural man!"

"Lest you forget, I was pretty stricken with Shirley myself, Denny! But of course, not the un-natural love of the liberal personality!"Alan intoned charitably.

"Of course not, Alan!" Uncharitably chimed in Denny. "Even Carl understood that!"

"And he rightly understood that, and never once believed that you loved her as you did me!"

"I should think not! Never would Carl even consider that. That's probably why he never thought to "Schmidt-can" me on the dock!" Alan dryly commented.

"Without doubt!...Oh Alan, have you been longing for sex which .you have found yourself denied because of your love for me?"

"I think that when you asked me to marry you, I had prettty well decided that 'normal' female male sex was closed for me forever. And you asked why did it take so long for me to say 'yes.?"

'What would you have thought if it seemed that marrying me meant that you needed to give up sex forever?"

"Yes, I see your point. But in that case why would you have ever agreed to marry me?"

"Because I loved you?"