***I do not own ABC Family's The Fosters or any of the characters***


Takes place after Connor tells Jude he can't stay over with Jude because his dad thinks Jude is gay.


Jude stared at the place where Connor had been, stunned. He really thought that? He truly didn't want to be around him because he might be gay? Despite the sinking feeling in his chest, Jude made his way to math class.

No one talked to him. He didn't pay attention. He merely glanced out the window and concentrated on the flowers outside and the beach further out onto the grounds. The bell rang and Jude rushed out the door to his locker. He wanted to talk to Callie, more importantly, Lena.

Lena wasn't home when he walked back with Brandon, Callie, and Wyatt. Wyatt and Callie immediately left because Callie had work. Brandon hibernated to his room. Jude sat in his and Jesus's room, opening his book bag to begin his homework.

The front door opened and Lena walked in with Jesus and Marianna.

"I hate having to share the gym! It isn't fun having all the guys on the team ogle my sister!" Jesus argued.

"It's not like you don't like watching us dance. I saw you watching the other girls," Marianna rebutted.

"Hey sweetheart," Lena interrupted. Jude was sitting on the couch, now, reading a book for his English class. He looked up from A Wrinkle in Time.

"Hi." Marianna sat beside him on the leather couch.

"What's wrong Judicorn?" She asked. Jude shrugged. The question was dropped until later that night.

Up in Marianna and Callie's room, Marianna was painting her nails a deep blue. Jude eyed her nails from across the room, where he sat on Callie's bed.

"Want me to do yours again?" she asked. Jude nodded; he moved to sit beside his adoptive sister on her bed. He held out his pale hand. Marianna dipped the thin brush into the silky navy paint. The brush strokes were gentle on his nails. Jude closed his eyes. He needed the comfort of the polish on his nails. He needed the relaxation and relief of home.

"What's been bothering you?" Marianna asked again. Jude's eyes flew open at the sound of her voice.

"Connor," he said with a sigh. "He said he couldn't sleep over anymore… because…because his dad thought I was gay." Jude hung his head. Marianna lifted his head with two of her fingers. She spoke to him like she was speaking to a wounded animal.

"Did Connor say anything after that?" she asked gently.

"I asked him if it mattered…he…he just walked away."

Marianna encased her little brother in a hug. When she released him she said, "It doesn't matter."

The navy polish on Jude's hands was mildly smudged from the embrace, but still sent a wave of comfort and acceptance through his body. He sat on Marianna's bed, watching her polish her own fingers and toes with the navy paint.


Jude wore the polish to school again. He needed the security of the paint on his nails. His classes flew by; he really didn't pay attention in any of them. Lunch seemed to hit him like a bus. Other students did point out his nails, but Jude braved the snorts and stifled laughter from his fellow male students. Jude sat alone at lunch again. He opened his sandwich bag and pulled out a turkey sandwich. Across the courtyard, Jude saw Marianna eating lunch with the dance team members and Callie eating with Wyatt-Brandon with Mat and Lou.

"Hey Jude," Connor said softly as he sat down beside him.

"Hi." Jude took a bite out of his sandwich and ignored Connor.

"Listen. Jude. Jude, I'm sorry." Connor turned toward his friend. "I didn't mean it like that. But are you really gay?"

Jude spun to face his ex-friend. "I don't know. That's what I've been trying to figure out. Just thought you'd be there," Jude said shortly. He took another bite of his sandwich before tossing the rest of his lunch into the garbage can and walking back into the school to prepare for English. Jude was unaware that Connor had followed him in. Jude pulled his English textbook out of his locker when Connor appeared at his other side.

"I-I-I have to listen to my dad, but I don't want to be like that." Connor stopped, searching for a sign that Jude was listening. Jude continued to gather his spiral and pencils, but listened. "I don't want to skirt around you because you're gay. I don't care who you like like that!"

Jude looked up at Connor for the first time since his now friend had started talking. "What if I liked you?" he whispered. Connor froze for a second. He stared at Jude not with disgust or fear, but with curiosity. Jude looked up at Connor's frozen figure. He had ruined it. Ruined everything. Jude took a deep breath before speaking. "Say something! At least tell me before you run away!" Jude broke Connor's trance.

"I meant what I said before-I don't want to be like that." Connor replied distantly. "I don't know. I mean-"

Connor's reply was cut off by the class bell. Connor and Jude left to their separate classes. Jude sat in the desk closest the door. He'd sneak glances out the window in the door to see if maybe Connor was out in the hall. While the teacher rambled about commas and apostrophes, Jude's mind wandered to what Connor was about to tell him. Was Connor going to say that he thought Jude was weird and gross? No-Jude's mind contradicted. He said he didn't want to be like that. What if Connor said he liked Jude too? Maybe then Connor and he could hang out more.

"Jude, where is the apostrophe supposed to be placed in this sentence?" the teacher interrupted.

"After the s," Jude said absentmindedly.

"Please pay attention." Jude simply nodded.

Class thankfully ended what Jude thought was ten minutes later. Math next. Jude was out the door and at his locker gathering his textbook, calculator, spiral and pencils within the minute. Connor was nowhere in sight. Jude gazed at his navy nails.

Connor doesn't hate you, He's just confused, Jude told himself. He's waiting for the right words. Calm down. He's probably not out of class yet. He'll give you an answer when he's good and ready. It was a lot to take in.

Connor ignored Jude most of their next class together. Connor didn't talk to anyone in that class actually. He hardly paid the lesson any courtesy. Jude copied the problems in his notebook, but got confused half way through the work. Usually Connor would help him, but Connor was having his own trouble concentrating on the work. Jude unscrambled the numbers and glimpsed up at the top of the paper where he had copied the formula. Y equals m x plus b. The teacher circled the answer on the board and Jude checked his answer, wrong. He was off by six. The answer had been forty-seven, not forty-one.

"Looks like you might need a tutor," Connor whispered with a smirk. Jude suppressed a grin. The bell rang for the end of class and he and Connor walked out the door. Brandon, Jesus, Marianna, Callie and Wyatt waved Jude over so they could walk home. Connor caught Jude's arm before Jude could get to his siblings. Connor led Jude around the corner to the side of the school. Jesus raised his arms in frustration.

"Have Connor walk you home!" Jesus cried. He was slapped by Marianna.

"Shh, he's talking with Connor!" Jesus rolled his eyes, not understanding.

Jude followed Connor around the side of Anchor Beach. The taller boy turned around and faced Jude. Jude, stunned, jolted backwards. Connor leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to Jude's lips.

"I don't want to be like that." Connor smiled.