Sam's POV following 5.11 Sam, Interrupted:

The anger bubbles inside. Churning just beneath the surface. He is not sure how much longer he can keep it hidden. It burns. He can smile. He can laugh. He can even fight and not go too far over the edge. It is still there though. The need to hurt. He clenches his fists. He bites the inside of his cheek in hopes of stopping the anger from breaking through. He has this fear. A fear that he will go to far, that he will hurt an innocent, or Dean. He has done that before, and it makes him sick to think about. He wants it over. This anger. He wants to be happy, or maybe not feel anything at all. It is not something he can drown out, or fight out, or cry out. It is there and it will always be. He has tried it. It just got him lost and hurt. He wants to be more like Dean. He watches as his brother keeps cool. He is calm. He has thought of leaving again. To protect the one person he cares about more than anything but fear keeps him sitting in the car next to his brother.

Dean's POV following 5.14 My Bloody Valentine:

Tears fall down his face. He is so lost. He can't hold it together any more. This isn't working. He needs something. He needs help. He calls on a God he doesn't even believe in. He is dying inside. He can feel the hole, dark and black. His own creation, meant to keep him safe. When he was child emotions were not a luxury that he had room for. He had to be cool and collected for Sam. No one else was there for him. But, god, he can feel them, the emotions that he thought he kept locked up. It feels like dying. It is too much. He is going to let everyone down. He is going to fail and it will be all his fault. He needs to get these emotions back in check. He can't keep doing this on his own. "Please." He can vocalize what he needs, but he hopes that if there is really a God that He will know what he needs. He wants to rage agents a God that has left, but he mostly wants help. He is too tired to fight any more. He just wants it to be over and done.

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