The Trouble with Horses
It's been a very long time since I posted anything, between work, losing interest in fanfiction and writing my novel (finally getting around to it!) I've not had the motivation to write until... Cullen! So prepare yourselves for some awful written cute stuff from your favourite DSH.
A little bit of rambling, a little bit of cute and a weeeeeee tiny bit of inappropriate.
They were still days away from their destination, yet the trip through the Western Approach was the most brutal, soul rending journey they had done yet. Sand had gathered in places it shouldn't, and Ashe couldn't help but let out a dry chuckle as she want Dorian dig it out of some of those unwelcome places, sighing with relief as he managed to rid his smalls of the pesky dust. Her own bindings were rubbing, bandaged underneath where the sores were beginning to rise and bleed. Damn she hated this place. The majority of her companions seemed to be taking it reasonably well, though who would complain to the Inquisitor, her already short temper fraying with the heat and discomfort. Bull sat atop his humongous war stallion, looking perfectly fine aside from the occasional muttering and scratching his horns... Note to self, Ashe thought, get some horn oil when she got a chance, poor big guy. Solas sat quietly at the back, humming a gentle elven sounding tune to himself, forever the picture of tranquility and peace. The only tell was that his bald head was red from the constant heavy sun exposure.
In front of her sat Cullen, who had taken a personal interest in this mission, finding some of the soldiers who had went mysteriously missing in the dessert, where they shouldn't have been in the first place. Again he seemed so calm, his huge war horse plodding along, occasionally snorting sand or pawing the ground playfully. Cullen's thick fur must have been boiling him alive underneath all that heavy armour, but each to their own she supposed. Sweat had gathered on the back of his neck, in turn, his hair had went fuzzy form the moisture, Ashe couldn't help but grin, it was cute to see his curly mop finally make an appearance, so different from the usual groomed and slicked back into place. Her eyes lowered to his waist and below, did her commander really have such a nice... Nope! Her internal voice cried, you are not having those thoughts about your commander, even if he is pretty cute.
Her attention dragged back to his mount, the gorgeous copper coat was reflecting the sun with a shine that would make Solas' head jealous, it's pace picking up as a hot gust blew, the nearby weeds rustling and jumping. The horses seemed to be loving it, though she noticed soon enough that her own was dragging wearily, favouring a leg. Lame. Of course he would go lame this far out into this maker damned hell hole.
"Stop!" She shouted, her voice sounding raspy and low, but enough that everyone heard and halted. Their little band came closer, surrounding her as she dismounted and picked up the offending hoof and using her back up dagger to clear some clogged up sand and dirt. Walking him forward a few steps, she sighed in frustration as he still hobbled onwards. Makers breath, really?
"He's lame, I'm going to be walking I guess," she growled to her companions, hitching the horse to one of the pack animals, "Sorry Blue," she muttered patting his damp grey shoulder, then marching onwards, determined to keep up with the front of the line. The boiling sand are at her feet through her boots, the heat bringing more discomfort as she mopped her face and neck with her sleeve. She would kill to have a nice cold oasis just now, just a puddle would be enough, somewhere to submerge and cool herself. Before she knew it, she had marched ahead of the rest, the heavy warhorses struggling to keep up as the sand became softer, their weight working against them as the Inquisitors slight body skimmed across most of the dunes.
Hoof beats behind her startled her as she strode onwards, purpose forgotten with the rising sun in desperation to find some shade. Of course it would be the commander, she couldn't have asked for a friend like Bull to come and enjoy some conversation.
"Inquisitor!" Cullen called as he rode closer, his exhaust only showing in his unsettled position in the saddle.
"Andrastes tits Cullen, I told you to call me Ashe!"
"Sorry Inqui... Ashe. But I'm sure you've exhausted yourself, you can march better than any soldier," his lips up tilted in a tiny nearly unnoticeable smile, but Ashe noticed, "I'm sure my charger can take two, save you walking any more.. I mean, I could walk for a bit."
Ashe laughed, she couldn't help it, he was offering a damn good deal. If she got to sit behind him she could have her fill of his figure and maybe she could actually sleep tonight instead of dreaming of golden curls and amber eyes. Or maybe she'd be pleasantly disappointed and find that her commander was actually a lard, and the armour covered six bellies. Chuckling again to herself, she took his outstretched arm and swung up behind him to sit on the lengthened saddle, made exactly for the purpose of carrying more than one passenger. Ohhhh this was better than her dreams, definitely. Underneath the smell of the dessert, and sweat, she could smell the heady odour of whatever his soap was. Sandalwood? Something earthy anyway. Plus the oil he used on his armour. She muttered to herself as she molested the mane of fur around his shoulders and back, nuzzling into it and hoping he wouldn't notice.
"Careful Inquisit... Ashe, any more shifting and you'll knock me off. Sol is good but she can't save me from that I'm afraid. What did you say there?"
"Hmmm?" She sighed lazily, her tired eyes closing as she leaned against him, wrapping her arms around and finding the soft tunic underneath the hardness of the armour. "Oh, the fur, it's softer than it looks,"
A rumble sounded under her cheek that could have almost been a laugh, but she could never be sure with the stoic Cullen, stealer of humour from any situation. Though as she nuzzled in, tightening her hold around his solid waist as she drifted off, she could hear a low humming similar to Solas earlier, yet Cullen's deep tune soothed her to sleep, the world narrowing to that one sound as sleep overcame her.
She awoke hours later, the sun still bearing down at its apex, the body in front of her leaning back into her and mumbling a pleasurable sound. It took her a moment to realise that one of her wandering hands had drifted into his damp curls, playing with the golden hair at the base of neck, twirling them around her fingers then rubbing his neck, feeling the tight knots unravel to her touch. She quickly jerked her hands away, forcing Cullen to twist and grab her before she tumbled off the mare.
"Terribly sorry Commander, seems I'll have to keep my hands at bay,"
He shocked her with a sharp chuckle under his breath, bright hazel eyes gleaming in good humour.
"No need My lady, I apologise also. I admit I was enjoying that more than I should have, it's been a while since I've felt such a delicate touch," the humour quickly turned to a blush, his cheeks lighting up under the burns, if it were possibly to be brighter. He quickly muttered something and turned around, gritting his teeth and holding firmly onto the saddle horn.
What had he done? The Inquisitor... Ashe sat behind him nearly silently now. Of course he had to ruin the moment and make it awkward between them, but who was he to deny her? Her stunning blue eyes pierced through him and had made him open up, to feel more than he had in a long time. He couldn't admit he had a crush on her... That would be unfair to her to have to worry about her infatuated commander, besides, how could such a beautiful, powerful woman such as her want anything to do with him. He was a pawn in her arsenal. No match to the slight bodied Angel sitting against him. He would not lie, the armour around his groin was tight, more so than usual and he would never admit to playing with the dark curls that had migrated across his shoulder to tickle his cheeks as she slept.
A few minutes passed and he became aware of her hands traveling upwards once more to tangle in his hair and massage his neck. Makers breath her hands felt godly against him. How could such a light touch bring him such peace? Then he felt something else, her breath, drift across his shoulder. Goose flesh rose on his arms and he was glad she couldn't see his face now... Or his crotch. His eyes closed as he leaned back into her soft body. He waited both anxiously and excitedly as her lips began to descend on his skin, bestowing butterfly kisses on him. Maker this was... He gulped, more than he could ever hope for. Her other hand that encircled his waist began to lower as well, settling on his thigh and rubbing circles, a strangled moan escaping him as his armoured hand settled on top of hers, stilling it.
Ashe was having far too much fun, she hoped that Cullen would react and here he was, clearly enjoying himself as much as her as his hips jolted when she settled her hand on his leg, feeling the thick fibrous muscle on the limb tense and move under her touch. His moan - half covered by a cough - had only urged her on more and her hand slid up, covered by his own. She still had miles of leg to slide up but came across a very familiar tightness, stretching his underarmour taut. Surely not. There was far more leg to explore before she came anywhere near his crotch. Recovering, she leaned forward to nibble on his earlobe, feeling his breath come out in a long tremor and whispered,
"My my Commander, you're hung like a stallion," and her hand travelled the last few centimetres to touch the bulge, but at the moment of contact, Cullen nearly leaped out of his saddle, startling the mare to jump sideways. They ended up in a tangled heap in the sand, Cullen landing with a heavy grunt on top of Ashe. She tried to laugh underneath the weight of all that Templar, seeing his shocked face contort into a grin as he made to push himself off.
Hey what the hell, Ashe smiled, leaning forward to capture his lips. He stayed frozen at first then settled back down on her, melting into the kiss, a hand tangling in her hair and holding her steady to him.
"Hey! I thought this was a mission, not one of Varrics nasty books," Bull called from the rest, "But good job commander," Cullen's face flared crimson as he untangled himself to Bulls thumbs up. His mare had wandered over, chewing the fur on his armour and nickering to him. Damn horse probably thought she was hilarious.
"Well thanks for the ride Cullen, I should maybe go check my own mount..." She grinned at him and he looked away, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Umm yes, of course, Ashe, inquisitor. There's still some journey to go,"
Of course when she got back to her stallion, he pricked his ears and nuzzled into her, walking just fine it seemed. Damn lazy animal had just wanted a break and as he breathed softly on her, she smiled. The trouble with horses is that they seem to have a maker given gift of knowing when to cause trouble. She gave the stallion a hard pat on the neck and mounted. Bloody smart animal.
