Settling the Score with the Star Wars Prequels

So, what is this all about anyway? Well, we would like to ask you a few questions to start:

Did you grow up with the original Star Wars Trilogy? Did you have a childhood full of entertainment, toys, and inspiration from those movies? Did you experience some degree of disappointment with the Star Wars prequels? The two of us can put a bold check mark behind each question. We are pretty confident in saying that millions of people across our planet had a similar experience. That leads us to ask; What can we do about the Star Wars prequels? Take them and live with them? We tried that, and 15 years after the release of Episode 1, we still find ourselves criticizing the prequels. So we came up with an idea to right the wrongs. Make amends. Bring order to the Star Wars galaxy…

But first, a short story. A couple years back we were talking to another Star Wars fan. This fan ate and drank all things coming from the Star Wars franchise juggernaut. We started to discuss our critical viewpoints about the prequels. As is common with this kind of Star Wars fan, he started to become defensive. He accusingly asked us, "Who are you to question what George Lucas does in the galaxy he created?" Fair question. Our response: "You don't create a movie franchise as large as Star Wars, with millions of fans who have given you so much of their money, time, and attention, and give them in return Star Wars: Episode I-The Phantom Menace." Conversation over.

Now, let's get real. Nobody can erase Episodes 1-3. They are 'canon' for the Star Wars franchise and will be with us until they remake all the movies in, oh let's say about 20 years. As Original Trilogy fans, we can work through the stages of grief and attempt to come to terms with what has been done to our beloved Star Wars. For the two of us, there has definitely been anger and denial. There have been moments where the despair was so overwhelming that depression seemed inevitable. But did we ever reach acceptance of the situation? Never. So what stage of grief is left? Bargaining. We want to gain back some power and control over this mess that was created. So we thought, what if we were able to come up with an explanation to account for the most embarrassing, ridiculous, and disappointing parts of the Star Wars prequels? What if we were able to make this explanation fit into the Star Wars galaxy? Of course, it will never be accepted by the official Star Wars powers that be. But….it may just help us sleep a little easier at night.

So we came up with a story line that accounts for the disappointments of the Prequels, while still fitting in with the Star Wars Galaxy. We didn't re-write the entire story line. We kept most of the story line of Episodes 1-3 intact. Instead, we targeted specific events, concepts, and characters and give explanations for why they were created or altered. Who, do you ask, created or altered them? Who do you think would be so sinister as to wreak havoc within the Star Wars Galaxy? Well, of course it is none other than the Empire revising parts of history to suit its own purposes. The following chapters are written in a somewhat historical and research document format. And while they are designed to be read as if a historian or researcher from the Star Wars Galaxy wrote them, the target audience on Earth will hopefully appreciate how they address some of the more disappointing aspects of Episodes 1-3.

We hope you enjoy them. We look forward to your feedback.