"That little hussy? Really?" Sophie scoffed at Eliot, drawing attention from the others to their quiet conversation by the kitchen counter.

Eliot raised an eyebrow in amusement and ignored the others completely in favor of responding to Sophie.

"She's not a hussy, Soph, she's just... misunderstood."

Sophie scoffed again, "You would think that way."

Eliot just chuckled and walked away, sipping his tea serenely.

.

Hardison and Parker sat on the couch, waiting for Nate to finish reviewing the day's files.

"What was that all about?" Parker hissed to Hardison.

Hardison glanced between the still smirking Eliot and the exasperated Sophie, before turning his attention back to Parker.

"You got, me, mama. Not a clue." he shrugged.

That mysterious and slightly terrifying glint that Hardison had grown accustomed to lit up Parker's eyes, and he mentally braced himself for whatever she was about to say.

"You know what this means, right?" she asked, giving him a sly grin.

"We leave well enough alone and focus on the meeting?" Hardison dared, hopefully.

"Ha!" Parker laughed, "No. This means, Eliot and Sophie have a secret!"

Hardison sighed, "And?"

"And we have to steal it!" Parker whispered happily, "Obviously!"

He couldn't help it, Hardison grinned at the crazy beautiful thief.

"Of course we do."

.

.

The next night was spent monitoring Eliot and Sophie after the group went their separate ways for the night.

"I don't feel right, using the comms to spy on our friends," Hardison grumbled as he watched Sophie enter her building from his hiding spot across the street.

He could practically feel Parker rolling her eyes.

"We're not spying," she argued, "We're just watching."

"Girl..." Hardison began.

She laughed, "I know, I know, there's something wrong with me. Eliot tells me all the time."

"There's nothing wrong with you," Hardison argued instantly, thankful she wasn't there to see his blushing. "Anyway, is Eliot home yet?"

"Yeah, he's been here a while," Parker answered, sounding bored, "pretty sure he's in the shower... well, he was." Her voice became decidedly perkier.

"Parker," Hardison sighed dramatically, "We've talked about ogling shirtless Eliot. Mainly.. about NOT ogling shirtless Eliot."

"He's not shirtless," Parker defended, "He's naked!"

Hardison laughed despite himself.

"And I'm not ogling," Parker went on, "I'd stare at you if you walked around naked, too. I don't understand why you all make such a big deal about nudity. It's completely natural. I mean, I..."

"Parker, Parker!" Hardison interrupted her tangent, "Naked Eliot is not the point. We're trying to figure out what he and Sophie are up to, remember?"

"I remember," Parker agreed, "Oooh! Eliot has company!"

"Oh?" Hardison's interest piqued, "Who is it?"

"Hmm," Parker muttered, "I don't know her. But she's pretty. And also very naked."

Hardison laughed, "Of course she is. Guess we should give up for the night. Sophie and Eliot obviously aren't going to be anywhere near each other."

Parker's voice sounded somewhat distant, "Ok. Yeah, right, good idea. Home. Right."

"Parker?" Hardison asked, as the car hummed back to life.

"I'm not ogling!" she defended, "but if I was, wow, that girl is really flexible."

Hardison just shook his head.

"Just don't get caught, mama, you know how well Eliot deals with intrusion."

"He's not gonna notice anything with that girl's thighs over his ears," Parker responded, sounding equal parts impressed and amused.

"I.. I'm disconnecting now," Hardison chuckled before pulling the comm out of his ear and tucking it safely back into his pocket.

.

.

Five days passed, with each night's spying as unproductive as the first.

"So we'll meet back here tomorrow," Nate summed up, "Head up to the plant around 10."

The others nodded in agreement, preparing to leave.

And then Parker stopped Hardison with a hard kick to his shin, giving him a pointed look toward Eliot and Sophie, who were conversing quietly by the door.

The conversation was brief, but Parker managed to catch an all important phrase from Sophie's mouth.

'See you tonight.'

The maniacal grin that spread across Parker's face should have worried Hardison, but he was beyond that by now. He accepted her.

.

.

"Are we sure we wanna see this?" Hardison asked, as he trailed behind Parker on the way to Eliot's house.

"They're not having sex," Parker rolled her eyes at the idea, "Sophie would have told me."

"What else are they doing at nine o'clock at night, in secrecy and darkness?" Hardison countered, trying to peer into the dimly lit living room from across the lawn.

"They're not having sex," Parker repeated, slowly, scoffing at the idea.

"Fifty bucks says they are," Hardison disagreed, chuckling at the sudden tension in Parker's frame. She never did like the idea of parting with money.

"Deal," she turned to give him a grin, "I like taking other people's money."

Hardison rolled his eyes, "I know. Now, let's settle this once and for all."

.

.

The living room window ledge was just the right height to kneel beneath and peer through the window, undetected.

"You'd think he'd know better," Parker whispered.

"Pretty sure Eliot isn't concerned with windows when he can kill a dude with an appetizer," Hardison offered, shrugging.

"Point." Parker conceded.

"Look, here they come!" Hardison whispered, as he saw Eliot and Sophie walk into the livingroom and settle on the couch.

"What's that in his hands?" Parker asked, trying to see through in the dim light.

"I.." Hardison considered, "I'm pretty sure it's popcorn."

"Huh," Parker was stumped. "So, they're just going to eat popcorn?"

They watched as Eliot leaned to his coffee table and picked up something, before settling back agaisnt the cushions, passing Sophie the popcorn.

The room filled with light, suddenly, and Hardison and Parker ducked instinctively.

They sat, side by side, on the cold grass, wearing matching grins. Tomorrow would be fun.

.

.

"We ready to go?" Nate asked the team, patting his pockets in the age old 'keys, wallet, cellphone' check.

"Yep," Hardison replied, "But one thing first."

He and Parker exchanged matching wicked grins, before turning their attention to Eliot.

"What?" he grunted in annoyance.

"You li-ed," Parker sing-songed, giving him an annoyingly smug smirk.

Eliot, looked merely inconvenienced. "It's possible," he allowed, "About what?"

"You have a TV!" Parker's enthusiasm was not dented by his lack of reaction.

Nate laughed, then pointedly looked anywhere but at Eliot.

"OK, I have a TV now," Eliot shrugged, "So what?"

"Maybe Sophie should explain why we're so amused," Hardison suggested, chuckling when the grifter's pretty face lit up in surprise.

"Sophie doesn't have anything to.." Eliot growled, before being cut off.

"Oh, just admit it," Sophie gave an exasperated sigh, "Everyone but Nate knows now, anyway. And the sneaking around was fun at first, but I'm bored with it."

"Everyone but Nate knows what, exactly," Nate's voice took on a much more serious tone than the moment before.

Eliot looked trapped. Torn between keeping his secret and having Nate staring at him suspiciously all damn day.

"Fine!" he burst out angrily, "I have a TV. And Sophie comes over to watch TV with me. No big deal."

"What do you guys watch?" Parker asked, in a sweet voice, all false sunshine and cheerfulness.

Eliot just glared, crossing his arms tightly across his chest.

"Oh, go on!" Sophie urged, nudging him in the ribs.

"Fine," he practically spat, "We watch America's Next Top Model. You happy now?"

.

Nate's lack of reaction surprised the other four, who turned to look at him quizzically. They had expected laughter, or mocking, or some sort of sarcastic remark about Eliot's hair. Because the hair was always a fun topic to mock.

Instead, Nate regarded them all seriously for a moment before focusing on Eliot and Sophie.

"I think that Amanda girl has a good chance, personally."

Four jaws dropped in perfect unison.

Nate just shrugged and gestured them all towards the door, "We have a job to do, you know."

One by one they filed out behind them, still in surprised silence.

They made it halfway down the hall before Eliot spoke up.

"Clarissa's gonna kick Amanda's ass, just so you know."

Sophie shook her head, "Not a chance. Betti will win for sure. Clarissa's just pretty. Betti is a model."

Nate just laughed and pushed open the door to the outside world.

Hardison and Parker exchanged matching shrugs.

"They're all crazy," Parker whispered, pulling Hardison back a step so the others wouldn't hear.

Hardison's laughter echoed in the hall.

"You got that right, mama."

.

.

THE END.