Every now and then, I'll come across a fanfic that impresses me enough to write my own fanfiction of it. This is my response to Crystal Cat's "Goodbye is Forever," but from a different point of view. Lashina is her character, and Yu-Gi-Oh! belongs to a genius named Kazuki Takahashi-sama.
Sayounara wa Eien Da
"I will lock away the Shadow Games at all costs." The day I uttered that simple sentence, I had no idea what lay before me. My wife's eyes glowed with pride, but I could see Priest Seto glance at me with doubt. A ripple of awed murmurs rippled through the rest of the court. "My wife and the high priest will help my son to rule the kingdom until he is old enough." I raised my ringed hand. "May he never know darkness like the Shadow Games in all his life!" I called out.
Applause and cheers rang out through the hall. I smiled, enjoying it, and seated myself. Lashina beamed at me, her eyes glowing with delight. "Never was there a nobler pharaoh," she whispered into my ear.
I shook my head, brushing off her praise. "I hope I do not ruin your happy image in the month to come."
"Never."
Seto's opinion, however, differed greatly. "I hope you know what you're getting yourself into," he told me afterwards, frowning. "This won't be easy."
"I don't expect it to be," I told him lightly. "I'm pharaoh, descended from the gods themselves. I can take what comes."
His frown did not lighten. "There is a chance you speak the truth. But can your wife handle it?"
I flicked the heavy golden bracelets from my wrists and handed them to a nearby slave to put away. "The process doesn't require her blood!" I snapped, my fear for her well being shortening my temper considerably.
"No," he said. "It doesn't."
"I thought as much. Don't be talking foolishness. You're just annoyed because you won't be able to use your beloved Blue Eyes White Dragon anymore."
It was a week before the whole procedure began. In the meantime, I made sure to set things in order for the country to continue running smoothly after I was gone. I spent more time than usual with Lashina and my son, taking in all the memories of joy and tenderness I could. My wife was not taken to vanity, but she was stunningly beautiful all the same. Her hair was a deeper black than lampless darkness, and her eyes were as entrancing as the twining smoke of temple incense. Our marriage had been arranged, but I loved her no less for that. She was the kind of person who always seemed to know exactly what to say or when to put her arms around me and ease the pressures of monarchy.
One day we were in one of the lotus gardens when suddenly she paled. "What is it, Love?" I asked.
"They…they'll kill you," she said softly.
I nodded. "We have known that for a while now."
"But…" Tears filled her eyes. "I…I didn't understand then what it meant for our future. I'll never see you again."
I held her close as she struggled not to cry. "Dry your tears, Lashina. The death is a ways off, and I shall always love you."
"The death begins tomorrow," she said quietly.
"But I shall live yet longer…much longer."
"Three weeks!" she screamed softly. "Is three weeks long?"
I gave a half smile. "It shall seem very long to me." How right I was, though I had no idea at the time. It's always like that with pain. You believe that you can stand it, that it's a simple matter of pressing your lips together and ignoring the agony. Then it comes as real as anything, impossible to control. They had to loosen my soul little by little, day by day, or I would have died of the pain before my passing could be good for anything. Each day, I lost myself in a delirium of anguish and monotone chants. It felt like I was being carved away piece by piece with white-hot knives. But always I was whole when I came to.
Sometimes Lashina would bring me water even when I was beyond recognizing her lovely face. If I thrashed in pain when she touched me gently, she would only pick up the pieces of the vessel silently, her own hurts brimming in her eyes. One time I came to myself just in time to see her rush from the room. It was then that I understood the question Seto had asked so long ago. This was no easy thing for my wife to bear.
After the first week, they no longer allowed her to come and visit me. I was glad of that in a way. I don't think she could have stood it when they began having to chain me to the walls. Pain does things to a man's mind after it's been a while. I remember vaguely the thick bands of metal around my wrists, ankles, and neck; and the even thicker chains embedded into the wall to keep me still. The metal was always cold at first, and then it became sticky with my sweat. Often it dug into my flesh as I strained out of instinct to escape the agony. Always, I came to and found myself crumpled against the wall, the chains hanging heavily from my body. The unbidden tears would still be damp on my face, but Seto, who did most of the work, seemed to understand. A pharaoh should never ever cry, but maybe it was an exception for me.
The day before the finish at sunrise was especially hard. Striving to finish loosening my soul, they worked for hours upon hours. I had no rest. Whenever I tried to escape into blissful unconsciousness, they splashed my face with cold water until I came to, gasping from the shock and the return of the anguish. Finally, as the crepuscular light from the windows dimmed even darker into night, they unchained my limp form and took me to the temple. I think it was Seto himself who carried me, but I couldn't be sure. Inside he laid me on a table of stone and left me for the night. The other doomed were there too, but I was barely aware of them. At last, I could close my eyes and forget my pain, if only for a little while, if only until sunrise.
I slept.
Suddenly, warm hands grasped mine. I hadn't the strength to open my eyes, but I tried to stir in response. A familiar voice murmured something nearby and I felt my hand brush against something smooth and damp. Then gentle fingers brushed my hair, and salty droplets fell onto my face. Forcing a little strength to run through me, I managed to half-open my eyes. I didn't have to, of course. I knew that touch. "Lashina?"
At first, I thought she was here because the time had come. Yet she assured me the sun had not begun his daily passage through the skies. Her eyes were red from weeping and still the tears fell like streams from them, but she was as breathtakingly beautiful as ever. "Why…why do you cry?" I asked softly.
Her breath became ragged, torn by violent sobs. "Kill me," she pleaded. "Let me not live without you."
I forced myself to face her, though I could not sit up. I brushed the tears away from her cheek, remembering again how soft it was. "Do not cry," I soothed, though every movement ran fire through my muscles. "It was my choice, be strong for…for our son." My mind flashed to the happy little boy I loved so much. "The gods-"
She cut me off, her eyes raging. "Curse the gods! They listen not!" She clenched her teeth. "I shall pray no more."
"No…" I murmured, putting a finger to her lips. No one knows how I longed for the strength to kiss them then and there. "If the priests heard…"
"I spoke rashly," she said softly, lowering her still streaming eyes. "There must be another way…"
I shook my head slightly, managing a ghost of a fond smile. "Silly woman, you know there's not."
Resignation weighed on her face. "I know," she murmured almost inaudibly. She grasped my hand harder. "I would die by the dagger with which they slay you…"
The closest thing I had felt to panic ever in my life clutched at my dwindling heart. "No! You would leave our son alone and there would be nothing but death for you. At least I shall only be locked away."
"He will not be a child forever. It is not worth living without you."
"Do…do not say that," I murmured, struggling against the fatigue that held my body captive. Slowly, I managed to pull her to her feet. Her mournful mien lightened ever so slightly as she seated herself by me. One of the doomed, the tomb robber, snickered derisively, but neither of us paid any attention. I glanced at him out of the corner of my blurred vision, though. His eyes contradicted his laugh. He did not scorn me for having my wife beside me, but rather seemed almost longing. For a split second, I realized that he had never known any tenderness. A pang of pity shot through me, but my consciousness was fading. I felt Lashina lie down, felt her arms warm and comforting about me, and then I succumbed to the darkness.
I awoke when Seto gently shook me by the shoulder. He lifted my head a little despite the fact that Lashina's arms were still about me. I felt the rim of a dish touch my lips, and something warm and slightly bitter ran down my throat. A brush of sadness passed over his eyes and vanished. "It will not be long, pharaoh," he said softly. Then he put a hand on Lashina's arm. She started awake with a gasp and took a moment to regain her bearings.
"I told you not to come here," Seto said softly.
One of his companions stepped forward. "No," she intervened, her eyes glinting cruelly, "it is…" a smile toyed with her thin lips "…better this way. He'll leave his body more easily." A thinly veiled smirk flashed on her face as Lashina paled and her eyes widened.
"Maybe you will learn, your highness," added Seto with a slight bow, "not to interfere where you are forbidden." Then he drew a dagger and walked over to the first of the other six. I rested while they slaughtered them, knowing I would be seventh and last.
Lashina sat with me the whole time, my head resting on her lap as she ran her fingers through my hair again and again. Her face was a blank mask of grief, rigid in hiding the extreme anguish beneath. The only time I saw her countenance lift was when they came to the tomb robber, the one with the pale hair. He was a fighter, still bruised and scratched from his final run-in with the guards. I heard he killed three of them before the rest took him down…my best guards too. He was chained, but his eyes burned with an untamed fire. Seto approached him with a gleaming blade, staring him down, ordering him silently to stay put. The robber glared right back.
Suddenly, in one fluid motion, the robber lunged forward, his chains rattling. Before Seto could react, he had sunk his teeth into the high priest's hand. I saw an angry, triumphant smile flicker in Lashina's eyes as the dagger clattered to the floor. Seto hissed a curse and reached for his weapon, but the robber was faster. In an instant, he had flung himself towards the blade, pulling it closer to him with his foot. It skidded across the stone floor, and he pounced on it, clutching at it with greedy fingertips.
They got him from behind. As he bent to arm himself, the assisting priestess slashed him across the back. He tumbled forward, and the others quickly subdued him. I could see Lashina was bitterly disappointed that Seto had survived.
Time went on, keeping its normal pace, and then the others were standing over me, grim and silent. Lashina's hands were still all at once, and I saw the dripping dagger advance and closed my eyes in resignation. I could feel the shivers as they ran through my wife. Then all at once, cold fire erupted on my forehead. It spread itself in the shape of an eye as the priestess carved. Then it went hot, and I the world slipped away a notch further.
Then the cold fire was back, spreading down my chest in the shape of writing. I couldn't see it, but the distant pain told me clearly what was happening. Suddenly, a spot of soothing coolness appeared on my forehead, damp and soft. I heard the priestess gasp, and a short silence. Then her voice snapped out, commanding. "Do not cry; you will ruin everything."
Lashina did not respond, but I felt her nod a little. Slowly, I forced my eyes open. My gaze met hers. Her mouth opened slightly, and suddenly her words were tumbling over each other in an effort to leave her lips. "Beloved! You…you're awake, I…I'm sorry if I hurt anything. I…I love you, you know. More than anything, and I'll miss you so much. If there were another way…I'd die instead… Oh, if there was something else… I'll raise our son, though, and try to be brave, and…" She broke off as her throat tightened.
I felt the priestess finish the last cut and smiled slightly. "This…this is where we say farewell," I told my wife softly. The other woman watched, silent and without compassion.
Lashina swallowed and nodded. "Yes," she said softly, unable to hide how her voice cracked.
"Do not cry, my love," I said, desperate to leave her with words of comfort. "Goodbye…it's not forever, you know. We'll meet again…someday…"
She bit her lip. "Someday…someday is too long. I…I can hardly bear it right now…even with you here."
With all the strength I had left, I raised my hand and brushed her cheek, feeling the tears there. I should have liked to kiss her goodbye, but there wasn't time. Her eyes closed in misery, their long lashes falling like enchanted curtains. I felt icy agony pierce my heart. With a final sighing gasp, I let go of the world and slipped away. For an instant, I saw myself lying limply on the stone table, Lashina at my head and the others all around. I saw the torches flickering on the corpses of the others. And then, I slipped into the quiet nothingness within the puzzle. There I slept, clutching yet the dampness from Lashina's tears that remained on my hand.
I did not dream.
R&R
