Disclaimer: Most definitely not mine.
Now and Then
Dear Wyatt,
I feel so stupid writing letters to a guy in the future who – if I succeed – will not exist in the same way. But I need to vent, mostly about you, and paper is least likely to betray me.
You look so innocent at this age, so unlike the ruthless dictator you've become and more like the Wyatt I used to know, my sweet big brother.
The big brother who would protect me from my nightmares, both at night and during the day, the one who would get into arguments with Dad because he couldn't be there on days that were important to me – Wiccan festivities, anniversaries, even just baseball games - or because he forgot my birthday, again, the big brother who saved me from myself when Mom died. You were all I had, Wy, and you turned away from me once I stopped being suicidal.
I needed you, our bond, our friendship, and you threw both out the window, shut me out of your life.
I find myself looking back into my past – the future – and find there are few differences between now and then, and I can't remember why I ever thought there would be. When I was small it took you a while to become friends with me, but we eventually managed to come to some sort of brotherly agreement. Eventually you became by best friend. You were my everything. And you hurt me so much.
How could you, Wyatt? How could you?
I loved you, I loved you.
Hell, Wy, I still do. How could you do this to me?
I managed to survive what you did to me, but who else did? Who could?
I'm not sure even Bianca will survive your jealousy of me, once you find out about us.
You said you loved me, but did those words mean anything to you? I foolishly believed them.
Was I just another in that long line of impossible conquests? But then again, as you used to tell me, "Nothing is impossible. We can do anything."
The problem is I used to think that you meant anything together. I guess I was wrong.
I'm so confused. You would love me for a night, but ignore me for a week.
What demon could turn such an innocent child – who doesn't trust me, by the way, which shows so much – into such a heartless bastard?
I don't know, Wy, but I swear I'll find out.
Chris
I'm sorry people, I'm not quite sure how that happened...
I'll go back to my own fandom now.
Love,
Moretta
