Feeling.
Words:
395
Couple:
Audrey Parker and Nathan Wuornos. (Nathan Centric)
TV Show:
Haven.
Disclaimer:
All characters/quotes you recognise belong to SyFy and the creators of Haven.
Spoilers for 3x13.
Drabble.
Angst. Angst. Angst. Angst.

He could feel the key in his hand, the cold metal. He could feel the wood of his door as he pushed it open. He could feel the pain in his chest, from where he'd had a bullet taken out of him and been stitched up not even a month earlier, after the barn had disappeared. He could feel the cold air as he let the door swing shut behind him. And all of these feelings? He hated them.

He hated being able to feel. He hated being able to feel other people's skin, he hated being about to feel the material of his shirt as it slid over his shoulder while he pulled it off slowly. He hated being able to the grip of his gun as he pulled it from his holster and disarmed it. He hated being able to feel his own skin, as he ran his hand down his face with a sigh while he looked around the room.

His eyes landed on a photo frame, the picture of him with Duke and Audrey inside making him feel the tight coil in his chest as he tried his best to keep calm. When he picked it up and ran his thumb across her image behind the smooth, clean glass, he broke down.

It dropped to the ground and the glass shattered, scattering little shards of the glass over the floor of his lounge room. He could feel the tear running down his cheek and he loathed having his affliction gone.

He wanted it back. He wanted to be Troubled. He didn't care if Haven would have been gone, the meteors having destroyed it. He didn't care. He didn't want to feel. He didn't want to have that sensation. He wanted Audrey Parker back. He'd even admit to wanting Duke Crocker back in his life again.

Because he didn't think he could feel much else without them here. He didn't think he could feel much else when he was so clouded with the knowledge that in 27 years, she may come back. But she won't remember him.

He let the feeling of emptiness wash over him as he dropped to the couch with his head in his hands. He couldn't take it, being able to feel. But he knew that it would still be there in the morning, and she wouldn't be.

I finished watching the season finale not even an hour ago. I'm not crying. Not at all.

Yes I am. I literally sat there staring at my computer screen balling my eyes out and writing this because I had to write something. Gaah.

We all know that Duke and Audrey will come back, because they've been renewed for a fourth season, but I just can't stand it. I hate waiting -.-

I never intended for a season post-ep to be my first Haven story on here (I'm working on a song-fic to one of Taylor Swift's unreleased songs, which should be a good remedy for my dying fangirl heart) but I had this written and spelling/grammar checked within about forty minutes and I couldn't let it sit on my hard drive.

So now for the hiatus wait...

Thank you!

Review?