Alright. This is probably going to be a multiple chapter story, but I could leave it as it is. Depends on the type of response I'm getting. So review, and tell me what you think. Just a little background information: When Edward left, he just stayed and watched Bella. And now she is dying.

What If


He watched her, he never really left. He watched her grow into a young woman, and get a job for the first time. He watched her talk to her mother, her father, her friends, but never really respond, only nod, as if she were on autopilot. And he watched as they drifted away from her, moving on with their lives, so busy and bustling, the opposite of her.

As he watched, she grew more closed off; more numb. He watched as, on her birthday, she received a puppy, and cried because of its eye color. Topaz. The next day she took it to the pound. He watched as she broke all her CD's and clawed her radio out with her fingernails, never noticing that they were raw and bleeding. He watched, and he waited; he didn't know what for. To see her smile? To see her blush? After that terrible, fateful day, she never did either again.

He watched as she saw him, fleetingly, and then he disappeared. And then he watched as she fell to the floor in shock, tears streaming down her face, and lay there for hours, silent and unmoving. He watched as she lost her numbness, and sunk into depression. He watched as she lost weight, and eventually became so thin she was hospitalized permanently. He watched as she stopped talking, except to a photograph, a picture of Carlisle she had stolen from the hospital, and even then it was only to scream at it to bring him back. He watched as Charlie died, and she didn't respond when she was told. He watched as she grew old, and her hair turned white, and he watched as her once smooth skin became wrinkly and faded. He saw how she screamed when she looked in a mirror.

He was there, unseen, when her doctors told her she had only a few weeks left. He listened as her pulse grew slow, and he watched her sleep once more. He watched her heart slow down, so close to death, and then Edward slipped quietly into her room, pretending he was her grandson. He touched her cheek gently, and her eyes opened. He watched as, for the first time in years, she smiled. And she looked at him, and said

"I knew you would come back. I waited for a long time, but I always hoped. The only reason I stayed alive was my promise. Otherwise I'd be dead. It was worth it. I love you. I never stopped." He watched as his reply made her blush, and reflected that it was worth it.

"I never really left love. I was watching the whole time." She gave a weak smile.

"Why didn't you come for me?" This was a question he couldn't fully answer.

"I guess… I was afraid," She gave a fleeting smile.

"You're indestructible. What could you possibly have to be afraid of?"

"Because sometimes there are things you can't fix. Sometimes there are only so many times you can push a person away before they won't come back to you again. I was afraid…That I had pushed you too far… That you wouldn't want me anymore. And so I swore to myself that I would give you a chance to have a normal life."

"I don't know how someone as smart as you are managed to make such a colossal mistake. But it doesn't matter now. I'm dying, you know." He was alarmed to hear that her voice was growing fainter by the minute.

"Of course it matters! And I want you to know that I'm going to follow after as soon as I can."

"No!!" her voice was as sharp as it had been on that disastrous day before all of this began. I wasn't going to live without you. "No matter what happens to me, you will not hurt yourself. I forbid it!"

"But-"

"No! Absolutely not. This topic is not up for discussion."

"Fine." Sullenly, he agreed. He didn't know how he was going to live for eternity without her, but that didn't matter right now. He didn't want to spend their last minutes together arguing.

"Can you get me out of this place? I feel like I'm suffocating."

"Where do you want me to take you?" he asked

"Preferably the meadow. Is it raining right now?"

"Yes."

"Good."

Silently, he picked up her frail body, and left the hospital. She kept her eyes open as he ran, and she cried when she saw the meadow. Smiling through her tears, and the raindrops that mingled with them, she said "I love you so much Edward. I'm not ready to leave. We didn't have enough time."

Something inside of him cringed with every word she said, screaming at him to deny everything she was saying. He didn't deserve her love. It was his fault they didn't have any more time.

"I know Bella, I know. This is all my fault." A smile that was more grimace than anything twisted her beautiful face.

"Same old Edward, always taking blame he doesn't deserve. I won't have you wallowing. I want you to have fun. Use your time to do great things."

In the soaking rain, they kissed. Gently, yet with the same burning edge that always seemed to creep in whenever he was scared. And he was terrified right now.

Bella was dying. Bella was dying. It happened everyday, to millions of people. He knew this. But he also knew that when this particular person died, she would take most of him with her.

"I love you. Always and forever." The whispered words where the last thing she ever said.

And so he watched as her heart stopped, and she died, rain still falling upon the face that would never again smile, upon the cheeks that would never again blush, and upon the eyes that would never again see past all his pretenses. Her lifeless body was slumped against him, and he just froze stood there, silently, for what seemed like an age. By the time his family found him, he had put her body on the ground, and was starting to dig a grave for her. Alice was the first one into the clearing.

"I thought we'd find you here. She's gone, isn't she?" he nodded, and resumed work on the grave. Alice went back to find the rest of the family. When they came back, he was just standing there, standing at the prone form of the person who meant the most in the world to him.

"I don't think I can do this. Putting her in that grave means that it is final. That she is dead, and there is nothing I can do about it. And I can't accept that." The words came out strangled, so far from that velvet resonance that she had loved.

In a heart beat, Esme had her arms around him. He shook her off, and continued to gaze at the body.

In a last desperate attempt to reach out at him, to keep him from going under any more then he currently was, Carlisle said "But she is gone Edward. It was her time to go. God, in his wisdom; wanted her back with him in his kingdom. She wouldn't want you to be unhappy. Bury her properly, it is the last thing you can do for her." He moved closer, but stopped at the sound of Edward's voice.

"But that's just it Carlisle." His voice, beautiful as always, was twisted with pain and regret. "It shouldn't have been her time. I was so stupid! I should have listened to her when she asked me to change her! If I had only-"

"Edward," Alice interrupted. "There is only so many times that you can ask yourself that. You can't go on beating yourself up about that! You were doing what you thought was right. Bella," Edward cringed at the sound of her name, "Doesn't blame you, so you shouldn't blame yourself."

"Alice, I know that!" He was frustrated now "She never blamed anyone! I will respect her wishes, and do my best to be happy and not blame myself for anything. I know that was what she wanted. But that doesn't mean I have to like it." This was to be the last word he would say on the subject.

And so they buried her there, and they mourned; not only for what could have been, but also what was lost because of it.


Alright, the fate of this story rests in your hands. So push the little purple button and...just tell me what to do!!!