My name is dinner and I am here because I do nothing at my job and get paid handsomely for it. Also because I wish to entertain you all. Everything in this story concerning I, Izzy in this story, has happened; Army service and the retard in the van. I have rated this fanfic 'M' because there is cursing during the first few chapters, topped with violence and gore in future ones, which all leads to romance and DEATH!
OOOOOooooooOOOooOOOooooOOooO ooooooh.
I hope you all enjoy and give me some sort of "well done, you suck!" you know I always enjoy those, eheh. Any questions, please feel free to ask. I'm not really shy.
None of this Assassins Creed babble belongs to me. It's all ubisoft's ideas. If they were of my doing, Altair would be naked. All. The. Time.
Enjoy!
Take a vacation, they said. Close your eyes and point to a destination. It'll be fun, they said.
The place I wound up with was the middle fucking east. God only knew it was my dream to see the world, but not in triple digit heat! At least I wasn't alone, for once. My best of friends felt equally bored and up for an adventure, but she could tough through just about any weather. Not me. I fry in the sun just after five minutes. Any longer and its third degree burns with a side of horrific blisters. I do have to admit, she took care of all the details for our trip and more. The hotel was amazing! Coupled with hot men poolside and the cheap shopping! I also learned not to shake hands with locals…. On the menu today was a nice, relaxing tour through Jerusalem and its many museums and as a history buff it all equaled out as straight up porn for me, but the overly lovey young newlyweds to my right and the snotty rich tween and her snotty rich parents to my left are ruining the whole experience and my mood.
"Oh, come off it, Iz. This'll be fun. I mean, look around at this place! It's fricking Jerusalem! Just think of the history and you will survive the next couple of hours." Celee whispered over my shoulder after my sixth to-loud sigh brought forth after snotty rich tween comment for the hundredth time on the heat.
I turned to Celee and spared a glance at her overly energetic smile that crinkled those too blue eyes of hers. This bitch was a firecracker and one of my closest friends, as I've mentioned before. With long, multi-colored hair, gages that didn't make her look lopsided, porcelain skin that never seemed to burn over a blush, her fashion sense that always screamed adorable and a shining personality to boot.
I, on the bland hand, had long, light auburn hair that reached just below my breasts, eyes that turned from a light brown to hazel depending on the mood that hid behind frameless, wire glasses. I was a whopping five foot four inches with a limp thanks to five years in the army that ended with a retard behind the wheel of a van and shitty driving skills. My fashion sense compared to Celee was mediocre at best; blue jeans that bordered on white from over wear and a tank top that had 'August burns Red' in bold, black lettering with a purple tank underneath to keep somewhat decent in public paired with a plain pair of black cordons by TOMS ™ and a satchel bag with camera, phones, wallet, water, and hoodie.
See? Plain as the day I stopped giving fucks.
Hence my lust to see if this tween bled glitter or crimson.
I hope its glitter.
Our tour guide, a short heavy set and horribly balding Arab with better English than what I could possibly muster led us off the street into a sun bleached, clay building with a large main area and smaller rooms on either side.
"Here we have a building supposedly used by assassins long, long ago. They were usually manned by a single person who acted as the middle man disguised as a map maker, one of the more popular "jobs", giving out orders and missions to the assassins who came by via the sun roof to your right. There are many like this one throughout the country and, with the expansion of man, throughout the world."
I raised my hand.
"Yes?"
"The assassins, I thought, were wiped out by the Mongol Empire during the invasion of Khwarizmi in 1275. I understand there were maybe others who tried to revive the culture, including many types of government, but there can't STILL be organizations like this one out there." I heard the tween snort and mutter 'nerd' under her breathe, but I was focused on the knowing smile on the Arab's chubby face.
"My dear, there are always mysteries out there for us all to discover; something to chase or to give hope. This is merely a myth. Now, let's move on before our young children die of heat stroke, hm?"
Celee giggled and I chortled as Snotty Tween Mcrichy turned red and started babbling and yelling about her upcoming 13th birthday in ten months. Celee and I were the last to leave the building and thankfully stayed towards the back of the group.
"Did you really have to ask that question?" Celee asked taking photos of locals and scenery. I shrugged and ogled cheap DVD's.
What can I say? I'm a cinephile.
"I have a filter for vulgarity and violence, but when it comes to history, legends, and/ or myths I have to say something. I can't just let people say shit like that and get away with it. It's like if someone said John Wilkes Booth didn't shoot Abe Lincoln, he was actually turned into a vampire and lives to this day killing his own kind, I would lay down some sort of law and then proceed to lose faith in humanity."
"One, that was a movie, two, he wasn't turned into a vampire at the end and three, I thought you already did after you saw 'Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.'" Celee fingered a few bracelets as we slowly lost our tour.
"Fully lose faith and I just had a thought. I say we ditch everyone and go on our own little adventure. If anyone gives us shit later, we'll say we got separated and lost!"
We glanced at each other and to the group who had stopped to cackle on about a cathedral. As swift as amateur ninjas we disappeared into the mass of tourists and natives. No one noticed our absence.
I wish now that someone had for we found ourselves entirely too lost and with no map. Too make a long and boring story short and to the point, we suffered through city after city after city before we found what we had initially been looking for and what we thought was relatively closer to Jerusalem: thousands of years ago the city set in the mountains by men of an old order had been known as Masyaf. Now, due to modernization and the loss of tradition, it was known as something different and had been long forgotten; abandoned.
I knew we had stepped into something we couldn't handle the moment we entered that ghostly gray castle and found it sitting upon that dusty pedestal with life. It breathed us in, watched us look upon it. No, we didn't notice the piles of decrepit books that should have disintegrated years ago or the shelves, chairs, and tables. No, we noticed the glowing, vibrating golden orb laying before us for someone to touch; to take. Celee reached out just as I had and as our hands lay gently upon the cool metal surface it spoke words I couldn't grasp and consumed us in a presence that took us from our reality to another.
I watched the castle melt away and with it my best friend. I screamed her name and reached for her, she doing the same, pure, unadulterated fear painted across her face along with mine. What my hand fell upon was not hers, but the hilt of a sword attached to a man with cruel features. He shoved me to the ground, straight unto my ass and began to screech in unfamiliar languages. His voice faded as I took in my surroundings; exactly just as Jerusalem was minus the modern attachments.
I was unsure when the thought crossed my mind or how I came to this conclusion, but I was in the past or just straight up high in the middle east where women who looked like me were executed for prostitution and a soldier/guard which now looked at me with utter disgust and intrigue because resting in my left h hand was the treasure I had read about in ancient books that spoke of knowledge to those who cradled it.
I held the Apple of Eden and I had no idea what to do next as the soldier/guard and his squad slowly circled me.
Again! None of this shit belongs to me and PlEEEEASE give me something to work with. My name is Dinner and I say have a good night.
