Running from Insanity
Rated T for torture. Simple as that.
I suppose you could say that this fic is a bit like my other one, Truth. I may make this into a two shot, maybe three if it gets enough feedback. I have some ideas for it. I have found and almost limitless supply of inspiration lately. Please read and review.
I'm running. Running through the halls of Hogwarts, trying to get away from...him. I didn't go into the forest when he told me to. My friends wouldn't let me. They said I had to be kept safe. But now he's come. Now he's in the castle. And he's looking for me. I try and run but I know it is hopeless. He knows where I am. I see him through the devistation, the battle that has been raging for hours. Dead bodies litter the floor, but he doesn't give them a second glance. His blood red eyes have found me, and he's smiling. I stumble on. I have to get away.
He follows easily, getting closer and closer with every step I take to get away from him. I have to hide. There! A room. I run inside and slam the door shut. It won't hold him for long. The room is filled with shelves laden down with books and potions and odd devices. I run behind one of them and slide to the ground. I'm so tired. I've been running for so long. I want to rest but I can't, for he has just opened the door and he knows I am here, hiding from him. He can sense my fear.
The door shuts quietly behind him and locks. No one can save me now. He comes forward, his eyes searching for me. "Harry..." he hisses, sending a shiver down my spine. I crawl forward a bit, trying to stay hidden, and peer at him from between the shevles. But he knows. "Come out and play, Harry...you can't hide from me." He has that smile on his face. The one he always has before he tortures me in my dreams. I continue to crawl. I can't let him find me.
He's getting closer, and my scar is burning. I push the pain away. I have to focus. If I could just get to the door I could escape and get help. If I could find Remus and the rest of the Order we could make a plan and figure out how we are going to take down the massive amounts of Death Eaters attacking the school. We could come up with something, I'm sure of it. But first I have to make it out of here alive.
He pokes his snakelike face around the first row of shelves, looking for me, but I'm already gone, now behind the second row, crawling away. He looks a bit annoyed, but his smile doesn't falter. I'm still here, and he knows it. He continues forward slowly, eyes searching for any sign of where I am hidden. I make sure to remain quiet. I know he will hear every tiny sound I make.
Again, he goes into the next row of shelves and I am not there. Again, I have moved. But there is a problem. The further back I move the darker the room gets, and the more clutter is piled onto the shelves. I find I can't see him unless I move something out of the way, which I can't risk doing. I am worried. What if he comes behind me? What if he catches me unaware?
"You cannot hide from me forever, Harry." he growls, his eyes flaring up like uncontrolled fires. The pain in my scar spikes and I cannot hold back the tiny gasp of pain that passes over my lips. I slam my mouth shut, but it is too late. He heard me. In seconds he's in front of me, his wand out. "Harry, you didn't think you could really escape, did you?"
I can't speak. No words will come. My fear renders me silent, and I can only stare. He's coming closer, and I can only slowly scoot away, my eyes wide and quivering. "Did you think that if you didn't come to the forest when I ordered it, that I would just give up on finding you? That I would not keep my promise about joining the fight and hunting you down?"
No, I knew he would come after me. I had tried to tell the others this, but they hadn't listened. Luckily I was able to sneak away and keep him from killing them as well. "I was going to just kill you, Harry, but now...now that I've had to go through all this trouble to find you...I'll make your death agonizingly slow and painful."
I had been scooting back farther and farther away from him, the monster that wanted to hurt me so badly. I knew, in the back of my mind, that I would soon run out of room and would hit the wall were I would be trapped. I have to try and get past him so I can escape. I had to be fast. I got into postion and waited. I only have one shot at this. When he was opening his mouth to say something else, I shot forward and tried to jump past him. It was not to be. He grabbed a fistful of my shirt and held me suspended in mid-air, his eyes staring into mine. I began to struggle, desperte to get away. But he was strong, and I could not get out of his iron grip.
He's moving forward, taking me with him, and I am scared. I know he will hurt me. He wants to hurt me. I can see it in his face. My back touches cold stone and he presses me against the wall. One hand holds me there while the other puts away his wand and pulls a sharp knife from his pocket. He brings it towards my neck and places the tip on the right side of my chest. "Make sure you scream, Harry. I want to hear that beautiful sound outside of your dreams." With those words he slowly but surely pushed the knife deeper and deeper into my chest, till only the hilt was visible. I moaned loudly as the cold steel cut through flesh and muscule. I wouldn't scream. I would not give him that satisfaction. Blood was staining my shirt. Annoyed, he gave the knife a sharp twist. I shut my mouth tight against the pain and instead kicked my legs out, catching him in a blow to the shins.
He let out a growl and released his hold on me. I fell to the ground and immediatly began crawling away. I knew he would come after me soon. I moved as fast as I could on my hands and knees, the knife still in my chest, not glancing back to see if he was behind me. I knew he was.
Then I hear the dreaded words issue from behind me. "Crucio!"
I fall, twiching on the ground, screaming for the whole castle to hear. Fire burned every inch of my body, and somebody was surely beating my brain with a club. My eyes filled with tears that fell quickly down my face. He was standing above me, grinning. A foot turned me over and onto my back. I looked up at the monster with blurry eyes, for my glasses were wet with tears and blood.
The curse ended, leaving me shaking on the floor. He bent down and straddled me, pinning my arms to the floor. "That sound...so beautiful. I want to hear it again." He took out his wand and imbolized my arms, so I could no longer move them. His body was pressing down on my legs, so I could not use those ethier. His fingers wrapped around the handle of the knife that still stuck out of my chest. He yanked it out, blood coating the blade. He wiped it off on my shirt. "I am so glad you didn't come to the forest, Harry. This is so much more fun than just killing you. I get to hear you scream and watch as the pain runs through your body. You're at my mercy."
The knife came down swiftly and this time buried into my stomach. Again I let out a scream, for I could not hold it back. The knife cut through me like I was nothing more than butter. He laughs as I try and arch my back, but he is holding me down, so I can't. Blood is soaking my shirt and he is staining his hands with it. After a minute or two, he pulls the blade out and I am left gasping for breath, my throat raw. He inspects his hands that are covered with my blood. "Amazing..."He whispers. He looks back at me and smiles. "Very good, Harry. If you continue to scream like that I just may keep you alive after all."
He rasied his wand again, and I flinched slightly. Then there were voices. "Harry? Harry, are you in there?" Whoever they were started to pound on the door. Spells were fired but the door refused to yeild.
He smirks. "Don't worry, Harry. They won't be able to get inside. Make sure you scream nice and loud so they can hear you. Crucio!" Again the mind numbing pain. I can't tell if I'm screaming or not. All I know is that the pain is ripping at my mind, unraveling it. If this torture went on for too much longer I knew I would lose myself to the call of insanity. Which at the moment, didn't seem too bad an option. And he wasn't done. While one hand held the wand that continued to cast the Cruciatus curse on me, the other gripped the knife tightly and shoved into into my shoulder.
The agony that this two torture methods caused was immense and unbearable. My eyes rolled back into my head. Oh how I want to die. "Stop..." I rasp, that simple word causing me so much pain. "Stop..."
He shakes his head and shoves the knife in deeper. "You have to beg, Harry. Beg me to stop this torture."
I didn't want to. I didn't want to do as he said. But the pain...it was too much for me to handle. I could feel myself slowly slipping away. "Please..." I sob, my voice so gone it was barely a sound at all. "Please...please...stop..."
He obligied, stopping the cruse and pulling the knife from my shoulder painfully. I couldn't move. I was so weak. Every sound came at me muffled. Like the constant pounding on the door and his voice, which was speaking to me again. I couldn't make out all the words. I only could hear, "...torture...friends can't save...hours...back to headquarters..." None of it made any sense to me. I just lay there, breathing hard. He must have known I wasn't listening, because he placed me under the cruse again. I knew how much he was enjoying my screams, my pain. But I was powerless to stop screaming and twitching on the floor. Powerless to stop my back from arching and powerless to stop my eyes from rolling back into my head.
Not soon after I was begging again. Only this time he ignored my pleas. I shriek and scream and beg for him to end the agony. He still does not stop. I feel myself falling away. I'm on the brink; balancing clumsily on the line between the real world and the realm of insanity. As the pain continues to tear at me, I begin to lean towards the latter side. Finally, thank Merlin, he removed the curse. My face is stained with tears and just breathing is a painful chore. He was staring at me, his red eyes happy, his robes and hands coated in my blood. "You almost left, didn't you, Harry? Is the pain too much for your weak little mind? Does it want to give up and slip into it's own crazy little world?"
And even though it hurt so horribly, and I was surely crazy already for doing so, I opened my mouth and managed to say, "I...am not...crazy..."
"No..." He inspects me, shaking his head. "No, you're not. At least not yet. But imagine it. If I killed you they would be devestated. If instead, I made you go insane...oh that would be even better. You would be alive, but unable to do anything to stop me. You would scream and lose control and attack those close to you. When they locked you up in Azkaban for being a threat to socitey, I could visit you and torture you for as long as I liked. For when you torture an insane person, they feel the pain a hundred times more, and their screams are all the sweeter. How does that sound, Harry? You can be my own personal torture toy. But I suppose in your insanity you won't really mind."
He places the tip of his wand against my chest. The curse had already left his lips by the time the door was finally broken open, and what remained of the Order of the Phoenix, plus a few members of Dumbledore's army, ran inside. They saw me as I wither and twicth on the floor. And I saw them. Remus stood at the front of the group, bruised and bloodied, but strong. Without hesitation, Remus attacks him. He is forced to fight back and ends the curse, getting off of me and joining the fight. It doesn't last long. When the opprotunity presented itself, he shot me a sickly grin, then dissappered. The apparation wards must be down.
The group fell to my side. Someone asks if I am alright. But they are too late. I smile dumbly. Everything is hazy and yet so very clear. Why hadn't I looked at life this way before? It was much more enjoyable. I take somebody's hand in my own. I do not know who they are anymore. Strangers...hadn't some one told me to stay away from strangers? I did not know. But this stranger seemed okay. They seemed so familiar yet...they don't. I giggle raspiliy. I just thought of something funny. "The snake runs from the wolf, when the snake is clearly stronger. And the snake leaves the stag to lay and ponder. The wolf falls to the stag's side, while the stag no longer thinks of suicide. But wolf don't you worry, don't you fret. The stag will kill the snake yet. Even though the stag is utterly mad, there is still hope to be had."
I laugh and laugh, not sure why I am doing so. I feel the eyes on me, and I know they think me mad. And the truth is, I am. But is it really that bad? I feel wonderful, and never before have I felt so free. The wolf looks and me with saddened eyes, but why? I give him a smile, for I find I rather like the wolf, even though he hasn't said a word. After a few moments of blissful iggnorance, I found that even people who are mad cannot put off the after pain that torture brings. The pain returns and I frown. It hurts. Oh it hurts. I feel myself begin to tire. I am not afraid of falling asleep here. The wolf is nearby, and I know he will take care of me. My eyes droop and finally close, the pain too overwelming. My last thought before I passed out was, "The snake hides behind lies, and at the hand of the stag he shall die." I did not know where these thoughts were coming from, or who the snake or the stag was, but I found that I didn't much care. The darkness creeped on the edges of my mind and I welcome it like a friend. I know it will take away the pain, if only for awhile. And in my madness, I relax and fall into the darkness. For how could anything ever hurt me again?
