Her Choices Chapter 1: Tris' P.O.V.
Can I be forgiven for all I've done here?
I want to be.
I can.
I believe it.
I shot up my chair, clutching my chest, and gasping. I just died. How was this possible? Right then, all I needed is Tobias. I needed his arm wrapped around me, and his lips pressed to mine. Someone tapped my shoulder. I turned and saw a familiar woman with a grey streak in her hair.
"Tori!" I shouted. I got up from the chair and wrapped my arms around her body. Tears escape my eyes as I remembered her lifeless body crumble to the ground. The pain in George's eyes nearly killed me when he found out his sister had been killed, but she was there with me. I felt her own tears fall on my head.
"It's good to see you too, Tris." We released each other and wiped our eyes. Crying was a sign of weakness in Dauntless. Dauntless. I missed it, even though I had never really been there. I looked back to the mirror and pulled my shirt down to expose my collar bone. My pale skin was missing the dark black ink that had become a part of me.
"You'll have to get those redone," Tori laughed. I smiled too. "You're still Divergent, Tris. It's not as dangerous as the simulation made it out to be. The threat of Jeanine is still out there." I nodded. "Oh, and Dauntless initiation isn't as bad anymore. There's no Eric, and no one gets cut." I smiled at the thought. I wouldn't have to fight to get my real life back.
"Will everyone who was in my simulation remember me?" She just smiled and motioned toward the door. I cautiously stepped out of the room. I walked back to cafeteria and see someone turning away from the entrance. Those eyes were the ones that haunted my simulation. Will.
He turned slightly, catching my eye, and smiled. I was about to step toward him when the other Abnegation room opened. Out stepped my brother. He broke all the rules by sprinting down the hall and wrapping me in a hug. He sobbed and cried.
"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry," he cried. I didn't hug him back. I just pushed him away. There was pain taking over his face and pooling in his eyes, along with tears that threatened to spill over. I knew it was a simulation, but I could still see his eyes, hear his voice, telling me he was going to die to get rid of the guilt. I didn't even want to look at him. I needed to see my parents,Tobias, Christina, even Peter. I wanted, no, craved, the knowledge that they were okay. If Caleb remembers the things he did to me, everyone else had to as well, right?
Just then, a blur of black and white embraced me. The only Candor who would hug me this fiercely was Christina. I quickly hugged her back.
"You're alive," she whispered, like she needed more confirmation than the fact she was hugging me in that moment.
"It felt so real. The way Will's sister told us. You do realize none of us are going to let you and Uriah out of our sights when we get to Dauntless?" She laughed.
"What about me?" A black-clothed boy turned, just to reveal that he was Uriah. He looked into our eyes and recognition and joy filled his face. He left the embrace of a girl far shorter than he was. Looking at her face, I realized it's Marlene. They both moved to where we were standing, and hugged us tightly.
"I'm so sorry, Mar," I whispered.
"I know," she replied. "It's not your fault. Thank you for saving Hector. For Lynn. She would be lost without him."
"Don't forget me." Will ran in and pounced on us all. We nearly fell to the ground but we're able to regain our balance fairly quickly. He got off of us and hugged us all. I let only one tear trickle down my cheek. Hugging me last, he told me he forgave me. He knew it wasn't my fault. He reminded me I didn't have a choice if I wanted to survive.
An insistent tapping interrupted our reunion, of sorts. We all turned to see a teacher with a stern look that doesn't reach her eyes. We probably weren't the first friends from different factions, and we wouldn't be the last. We broke apart, but shared a knowing smile. Tomorrow would be the day we would join our true faction, with our true friends.
I walked back to where Caleb was standing
The bell rang and I resisted the urge to race out of the building and fly onto the train, riding it to my true home. I stayed behind, with the other grey-clothed Abnegations, cleaning the scraps of the other factions, for the last time. I walked home with my brother, ignoring his apologetic attempts. I didn't want to hear how he would never really do that, how he would never kill me in the search for new knowledge. I knew he would if he got the chance... He is an Erudite, after all.
We were walking down the Factionless sector, like we always did, when I hear a familiar whisper behind me. That deep voice sending chills down my spine.
"Tris?" I immediately turned to see who was calling my name, even though I had a pretty good idea of who it was. And there he was. Tobias was standing there, hope evident in his deep blue eyes.
When they met mine, so many emotions flooded his face, but neither of us acted on them. We just needed to wait less than 24 hours to be together again. He passed us, walking the opposite direction I expected him to, earning him Caleb's pathetic attempt at a menacing scowl. He nodded, respectfully, at my brother, but I could see, it was taking his entire will not to jump him.
When Tobias stepped passed me, his hand latched onto mine. I felt him slip a piece of paper into my hand.
The second we walked through the door to our drab, Abnegation home, I raced to my parents. I sobbed as they held me. They didn't seem confused by my reaction to seeing them at all.
"I know, honey. I know." My mom just held me while I cried. After we finished hugging, and I had stopped crying, I went straight upstairs. I unfolded the note and saw Tobias' handwriting.
VI,
Meet me at our place.
IV
I had to think for a minute, back to my simulation.
The Ferris Wheel.
Once everyone was asleep, I snuck out my window, and scaled down a tree, outside my house. I hurried down the dark streets of Abnegation. By the time I got the Ferris Wheel, it was close to midnight. I spotted a shadow, with his back facing me. I picked up the pace, but I wasn't as quiet as I had hoped. Tobias turned around and noticed me running toward him. The cold air whipped around me and nipped my face. My drab dress snapped in the wind as I got closer and closer to Tobias.
When we got closer, he opens his arms and I flung myself into them. He spun me around and held me close. He pulled away, but quickly closed the gap. His lips molded go mine, the same way he did in the Chasm. Tobias held my waist as my hands found their way around his neck. His arms tightened around me, as though I would disappear at any moment. I cradled his neck in one hand while the other scaled and scratched down his spine.
He moaned into the kiss and I smiled. His tongue swept across my lower lip, asking for the entrance I happily granted. We pulled away a few moments later, due to a lack of oxygen. We looked deep into each other's eyes, and smiled. Tobias leaned down, pressing his forehead to mine.
"You're really here, right? This isn't some sick mind trick?" He begged for an answer.
"It's all real," I said, reaching up to stroke his cheek. He Tobias leaned into my tough and kissed my wrist. "I'm here, with you, and we have the rest of our lives to be together. I love you." Relief filled his whole being. I visibly saw him relax when I said this.
"I love you, too. I have been waiting two years to hear you say that. Every time I saw you walking in town, or something, I just wanted to run up to you, and hold you, and kiss you. I just needed to know you are alive. Now you're here, with me. When Cara, Will's sister, told us how sorry she was, I thought that there was no way in hell you would ever do that to me... to us. I had to identify your body. You were so cold, but it was you. Your face, your eyes, your hair... Everything was still a part of you. I just wanted to kiss you and you would wake up, just like in those old fairy tales." He let one single tear slide down his cheek but I quickly swept it away.
"Tori was there. She was my administrator. I looked for you. I almost tore apart that room looking for any confirmation that... that was just a serum-induced dream. That it didn't happen. I walked out of the room and saw you. You were eating with your brother, with your head down, like a good little Abnegation," He laughed. " But then you looked up. You were so small, so different but when I saw your eyes, I knew it was you."
"Tobias... I'm here. That will never happen. We're going to be together in Dauntless. I'm your's as long as you want me. I love you. When I... died, my last words were for you and no one else and I meant every word. I never wanted to, and never will leave you."
He kissed my forehead and worked his way down my cheeks and finally, finally, back to my lips. This kiss was less heated and less desperate.
It was filled with the love and the pain he had felt for the past two years and longing we had both felt for each other. We stayed like that for a long time. We just held each other, with quiet "I love you's" whispered every now and then, until the sun rose high into the cloudy, Chicago skyline.
I pulled away from Tobias, earning me a growl and pout.
"I have to go before anyone notices I'm gone. The Choosing Ceremony is in a few hours. I'll see you then, okay?" He smiled and kissed me.
"I'll see on the train." I kissed him back, but just as he was about to tighten his grip around my waist, I turned and sprinted away from him. I laughed and so did he.
"I'll see you later.
When the time came for the Ceremony, everyone chose as in my simulation. All except one... Caleb. When Marcus handed him the knife and he sliced his hand, the scarlet blood pooled in his hand. One drop fell from his hand, but the water wasn't tinged anymore than it was a minute ago. Instead, the coals sizzled with the new presence of liquid. I bit back a gasp. He looked over at me and smiled.
I hoped he'd realize that Dauntless would never be the place for an Erudite. When it was my turn, I did the same as before, letting the blood fall into the red crackling coals. No one was surprised like they were in the simulation. It's as if they knew it was coming. Then Al's turn came. A new streak of blood fell down the shard of glass.
I let out a slightly audible sigh of relief that there would be no way he could hurt me like he did before. Christina saw this and hugged me. She knew the pain that I carried over his death.
Silence fell the moment the Ceremony ended. All of a sudden, my faction rose, sprinting down the stares. When we left the Hub, the only thing I thought about, was how I could finally be with my true family, in my true home.
Hey everyone. Thank you so much for reading my story. I hated the ending to Allegiant so I thought I'd make it my own. I hate to be one of THOSE authors but I'd like to get 5 reviews before posting a new chapter. Thanks agin. If you love PLL, check out my other story "Why Her".
~Hanna
