Chapter 1

Even now I sometimes get flash backs,

As the rain hit's the window I'm reminded of the cold dreariness of forks, some of the best times of my life and some of the worst happened it that town, my heart still aches every time I think back.

I work in a small bookshop called simplicity, the pays not great but I love to read and work with books that's why I'm an English literature student here at the collage of Alaska in Juneau. Once I Finnish studying I want to work in a publishing House that would be my dream job.

I have friends from collage and work, iv even had a few boyfriends but none of them lasted. I think I'm afraid if I let anyone in, I mean truly in to my heart that they will shatter all that's left of me. Its been four years since iv had to pick myself off the floor and struggle to put myself back together again.

I look back at my laptop I realise iv been sitting reminiscing for the past fifteen minutes, lost in my own thoughts.

I looked around my apartment in the 3 years that I lived here I had managed to clutter it up nicely, with books and paintings and prints the only word I can use to describe it would be cozy.

The apartment was one bedroom and a study, a decent size bathroom with the best tub, the lounge which is connected to the kitchen, bedroom and bathroom.

I've had no contact with most of the Cullen's except for Alice, the first time I got a email from Alice I sat there re reading it for hours, though they're mostly brief. I'm fairly sure she's just checking up on me.

"Bella I know your in there, don't make me stand out here and shout at you through the door cause you know I'll do it!"

I opened the door to find Jasmine looking flustered

"Jeez Bella don't you even answer the phone anymore,"

I duck my head and smile

"sorry jazz I was studying and didn't realise the time," I said

I sigh and walk into the lounge jazz following close behind,

"wait here jazz ill just go grab the work schedule for you,"

I walk into my study and quickly grab the schedule, I want to get jazz out as soon as possible, that way she might not ask me to go out this weekend,

"so Bella me and a couple friends are going out this weekend you should come," its almost as if she could read my mind I inwardly groaned.

"ummm well you see jazz I have to um…" but I didn't even have time to think of an excuse before jazz interrupted me.

"don't you even try with some lame excuse Bella, I'm only asking as a courtesy your coming whether you like it or not!"

What could I do so I sighed and smiled there was no getting round jazz if she had set her mind to something.