Full summary: Two years after the Zero Requiem, a Geass user kidnaps Suzaku in an attempt to resurrect Lelouch and enslave his soul. It doesn't quite work out as expected... Instead, Suzaku somehow ends up in a recreation of Jeremiah's orangery, with three more versions of himself and four Lelouchs. This... could be a problem.
Notes and warnings: This is a post-Requiem story inspired from the two trailers for the fourth movie. It will eventually contain: Suzaku/Lelouch, Suzaku/Suzaku, Lelouch/Lelouch, Suzaku/Lelouch/Lelouch... err... You get it. A lot of explicit SuzaLulu and self-cest in a lot of weird combinations. Also, warnings for BDSM, mental health issues, Suzaku's fucked up self-hatred and dark themes.
Also, a nod to elarielf on this one, as well as every other person who's written/created self-cest fanfic/fanart in CG. Congratulations. You made me do one of my own.
Chapter 1. Reborn
The first thing Suzaku became aware of when he cracked his eyes open was the pain. Every single bit of him hurt. His head was pounding. He felt a stabbing ache in his side when he tried to move, and his wrists hurt so much it almost overshadowed everything else.
He forced himself to ignore every single bit of it, instead trying to figure out what had happened. As far as he could recall, he had been in the Shinkiro—well, his Shinkiro—fighting off the mysterious version of the Geass Order that had been trying to attack Nunnally when a strange, massive knightmare with specs that widely outclassed his own had showed up. He'd tried to compensate for it with his Geass, like he had done in the battle with Kallen, two years back, on the Damocles.
After that, everything was a blank. The 'Live on' command must've taken over, but in this instance, it had apparently not been enough. Maybe it was just because of the strength of this mysterious foe, or because Suzaku no longer had Lelouch to conveniently take over the world and give him time to make his escape. Either way, whatever had happened had allowed his opponent—or the man's accomplices—to capture him.
Well, wasn't this just fucking peachy?
"Welcome back, Zero," a voice said from the darkness. "Or should I say, Suzaku Kururugi."
Suzaku took a deep breath and looked up. He hadn't been called by that name in years. Since the night before the Requiem. Although, he supposed that technically the Requiem itself counted, when he'd held a dying Lelouch in his arms, and Lelouch had delivered his final command.
He had still been Suzaku Kururugi then. Now, there was only Zero.
"Don't call me that," he said.
His voice was raspy and croaky, and the words came out weak. He hated it with a passion, and hated it even more that it caused the man to laugh. "And what else should I call you? It's who you are."
Maybe, maybe not. But regardless, Suzaku refused to answer to it. He had accepted that Geass, and had lived with it for years.
"I am just Zero."
"Mhmm."
The man finally stepped into the light, and Suzaku could finally get a good look at his face. He had green hair—although the shade was different from C.C.'s, thank God—which was held back by a strange metal band, and his teal eyes seemed to stare straight into Suzaku's soul.
"I think we both know that's a lie," the man continued. "But then, you've always been a liar. Wearing masks even before you took up the one of Zero."
Suzaku clenched his jaw to keep himself from spouting an automatic defense. The man wasn't precisely wrong, but that didn't mean Suzaku had to give him the satisfaction, in any way.
His reaction didn't seem to impress the stranger. "Ah, what a fierce glare. Honestly, it would almost scare me. If you weren't so helpless."
Helpless. It was true. He couldn't move a muscle. Whatever contraption he was strapped into blocked any way of escape he could've had. He could feel the Geass buzzing at the back of his mind, screaming at him to try something, anything, but there simply was no place to go.
Instinctively, he jerked on his bindings and hissed in pain when the action jolted his previous injuries. Blood dripped down his barely clothed arms. He must've done that before then, although he had no memory of it.
"Tsk, tsk," the stranger said in mock disappointment. "You really shouldn't hurt yourself so. It's such a shame, to damage such a marvelous specimen as yourself."
Suzaku ignored the comment. "Who are you? What do you want with me?"
"My name is Shestal. As for what I want... Well, to tell you the truth, as fascinating as you may be, you are not truly the one I'm interested in."
As he spoke, the lights in the room flared a little brighter. It allowed Suzaku to see something he hadn't originally noticed.
Mere feet away from him, there was a strange, metalic capsule. Shestal pressed a few buttons on its side and it opened with a hiss. A slab emerged from inside, and on it, was the very familiar form of Suzaku's very dead best friend and emperor, Lelouch vi Britannia.
Suzaku's anger at his own situation faded to the back of his mind at the sight. "What... What have you done to him? How do you have him?"
It was Lelouch, no doubt about it. He would have known that pale, slender body anywhere. After all, he'd been the one to set Lelouch to rest after... after.
It hadn't been in the white emperor robes, he remembered. Lelouch hadn't made any requests on how he wanted his body disposed of, but Suzaku had chosen to change him anyway. He'd dressed Lelouch in his Ashford uniform. The same clothes he'd been wearing when they had first reunited. The same clothes he'd been wearing when they'd been happiest, together. The same clothes he'd been wearing when, against all odds and inexplicably, they had taken over Britannia, side by side.
He had dared to kiss those slack lips just once. Even if he and Lelouch had never been lovers—he'd never dared—maybe a part of him had stupidly hoped that it would bring Lelouch back, like in Sleeping Beauty. True love, and all that. After all, Geass could do anything, and apparently, the witch was immortal. Or something.
It had been only a fanciful dream and a stupid impulse, and it had not worked. Maybe Geass simply didn't respond to Suzaku, or maybe there had been too much hatred between him and Lelouch. Either way, Lelouch's lips had stayed still and cold, and Suzaku had hated it, hated that he had been the cause for that stillness, hated that he'd been so useless and stupid and unable to find a better solution.
And so Suzaku had buried him, and with Lelouch, he had buried his heart and his weakness. No matter how much he cared about Nunnally, he would never love her the way he had Lelouch. With his emperor gone, he truly had become Zero—a faceless man dedicated to justice alone.
And now, here Lelouch was again, impossibly untouched by time. His chest was even unmarked where Suzaku's sword—the blade of Zero—had pierced it. It also wasn't moving. Despite his presence here, Lelouch was very obviously still dead.
So... How? Why... What did Shestal want? What was this about, truly?
"I'm a great admirer of Lelouch vi Britannia," Shestal explained, as if hearing Suzaku's thoughts. "It truly was such a shame that he decided to remove himself from the world so soon."
He approached the motionless Lelouch and caressed his cheek. "So beautiful. Almost too beautiful, wouldn't you agree?" His hand traveled over Lelouch's bare chest, massaging his nipples in a parody of an erotic caress. "Pure perfection."
This body in front of Suzaku was nothing but a simulacrum. It had to be. It was not the body Suzaku had buried. It was just a lie. That much, Suzaku could tell.
Even so, the sight of what Shestal was doing still felt like a violation of everything Lelouch had been. "Don't touch him," Suzaku snarled, struggling against his bindings. "Stop!"
"And if I refuse?" Shestal asked, laughing. "What are you going to do about it, Suzaku Kururugi? You're helpless, remember?"
Suzaku shook in his shackles, wanting nothing more than to rip the man's throat out with his teeth. "Oh, don't be so angry," Shestal told him, visibly unimpressed. "I'm truly here to do you, and the world a favor."
Suzaku doubted that very much. In fact, he didn't care about what lies and mind games Shestal was going to spout at him. As soon as he got out of these chains, he would tear the man apart, slowly and painfully.
Before he could figure out a way to make that happen, Shestal decided to throw yet another curveball at Suzaku. "You want him back, don't you?"
"Back?" Suzaku repeated dumbly. What the hell was Shestal talking about now?
"I can do it, you know," the man drawled. "I can bring him back."
"Impossible," Suzaku breathed out. "He's dead." By Suzaku's own hand, no less.
"Nothing is impossible. I'd think that you, of all people, should know that. After all, you watched Lelouch vi Britannia will God itself into compliance."
That he had, although to this day, Suzaku did not understand the enormity of what Lelouch had managed to accomplish. Maybe it had been then that he'd realized just how much he could never compare to his friend. A true king. The king—the emperor—Suzaku had killed, for their vow.
It had been so difficult to fulfill it, to go through with his part of the deal. But Lelouch... Lelouch had wanted to die. Suzaku had known that, had seen it in his eyes. He'd been so tired, the cross he'd had to bear too heavy, crushing him. Suzaku had thought that the Requiem would not only give the world a second chance, but also give Lelouch peace.
But now, here was this man, disturbing that, mocking it, mocking their promise. And the worst thing was that he himself could not deny the fact that Shestal was right.
"He can live again," Shestal said, latching onto Suzaku's obvious weakness. "You can see him open his eyes once more. Hear him say your name. Hold him. Hear his heartbeat."
Oh, God. The imagery Shestal was conjuring seemed to reach out into Suzaku and squeeze. Suzaku could see it, so very easily. He could see Lelouch's beautiful eyes, so warm, yet so fierce. Lelouch's voice rang out in his ears, as if Lelouch truly was speaking to him, at this exact instant.
He could remember one of their last conversations so clearly, himself, holding the sword that would later be used in the Requiem, kneeling in front of Lelouch's resolve.
"With this... We'll become Zero."
"Yes, Suzaku. We'll become nothing."
"And because of that, things will start anew?"
"Exactly. I'm counting on you, Suzaku!"
"Yes, Your Majesty!"
Even then, there had been so much warmth in Lelouch, always, just for Suzaku. They had hurt one another so much, but in the end, they'd stood together, always two parts of a single whole. And Suzaku had selfishly hoarded that knowledge in his heart, every single stolen moment of a dream turned nightmare, every smile, no matter how tired and sad it had been. He'd clung to the memory of Lelouch's peaceful smile, the way he'd embraced death as Suzaku had been preparing himself to thrust the sword into his heart. When his nights had been haunted by the memory of Lelouch dying in his arms, he'd focused on that, and on his last vow.
But none of that changed how much he would have liked for things to be different, how much he would have wanted them to be able to find another way.
"He can live again," Shestal said once more.
More memories flashed through his mind. The two of them, as children, at the Kururugi shrine, with Nunnally. Reuniting seven years later, first in the Shinjuku tunnels, then at Ashford. All the laughter they had shared, before laughter had vanished altogether from their lives. The anger, betrayal, grief and death that had come after... Until he, at last, had accepted his destiny, just as Lelouch had, and he had become Lelouch's ally.
Lelouch's sword. His Knight of Zero.
Impossibly, even if those days had been filled of so much strife, Suzaku missed them.
He missed Lelouch so very badly. He wanted Lelouch back.
As the desire pulsed bright and fierce inside him, the machine he was strapped into lit up. For the first time, Suzaku realized it was in some way connected to the platform Lelouch was in.
Lelouch's body began to glow, and Suzaku immediately panicked. "What's happening? What are you doing?"
Shestal laughed. "Oh, I'm not doing anything. This is all you."
"Me?" Suzaku asked, his head starting to spin. "I don't... I don't understand."
"I could never bring Lelouch vi Britannia's soul back from the world of C. He's much too stubborn for that. But you... Yes, you are the only one whose call he would heed.
"I thought at first that it would maybe be his sister, but then I realized my mistake. No, it was always you, his greatest weakness, the only one he both loved and considered his equal, the only one he ever truly trusted, even when he knew he shouldn't.
"He will come back, because you want him to. Because your soul calls out for his. And you can't stop it.
"And when his soul returns, I will hold it in my hands, and Lelouch vi Britannia will belong to me. Just like he was always supposed to."
Suzaku tried to tell himself that Lelouch's return would not help them, that it would only lead to a disaster. He tried to convince himself that he didn't want Lelouch to be back.
But it was a lie, and as good as he'd been at denial, not even he could stop this. There was no longer anything he could do. The mechanism he was trapped in tightened further. "Lelouch," he managed to whisper, one last time, not even knowing why.
Then, hot piercing fire coursed through Suzaku's veins and everything went black.
As Suzaku Kururugi went limp in the bonds that held him aloft, Lelouch vi Britannia's eyes snapped open. By his side, Shestal laughed.
"That's it. Come back. With you by my side, this world will be mine."
Of course, Shestal did not realize a very simple thing. Despite the power of his own Geass, he truly could not hope to control Lelouch vi Britannia, not even now, that he had been made flesh. He could not bend his memories and his soul to his will, not anymore.
Paradoxically, as much as he acknowledged Lelouch's power, Shestal did not understand that he could not truly cage it.
Lelouch did not truly see Shestal nor did he hear his words. The only thing that he saw was his knight, dangling in cuffs in front of him, looking dead. The only thing that he heard was Suzaku's last desperate plea, echoing in his mind, hidden in a simple word, in Lelouch's own name.
All of Shestal's preparations, everything he had so conscientiously set up beforehand, proved to be useless. The machine that had both made Suzaku Kururugi's command futile and extracted his fiercest desire from his soul started to break down.
Shestal stared at it in horror. "What? No... Impossible."
The irony of his own words escaped him. He didn't even have time to realize that he was contradicting the taunting comments he'd thrown in Suzaku Kururugi's face just minutes earlier. The room began to shake, the floor spliting neatly, as if cracked open by the invisible hands of a monster emerging from hell.
Shestal made a grab for Lelouch vi Britannia, but the moment he touched Lelouch's skin, nightmarish images exploded in his mind. He collapsed, paralyzed by the Geass he had sought to exploit.
He had known, of course, that the Demon Emperor was powerful. Bitu had told him, shown him the absolute perfection that was Lelouch. But Bitu had also said that Lelouch's psyche was broken, shattered by betrayal and guilt. With the help of Shestal's Geass and Bitu's special technology, he could be manipulated. His soul could be enslaved.
Clearly, they'd both been very wrong. They should have never done this. They should have never tried to resurrect Lelouch.
There was a massive explosion, and the whole compound was torn asunder, ripped apart under the force of the uncontrollable power of a man reborn.
Shestal and Bitu are new characters who will appear in the fourth movie. The quote of their conversation comes from the short story "Mutuality". Obviously, this is only a prologue and the multiples will come next chapter. Which I will post soon.
