Author's Note: Here I am, barely 2 weeks before graduation and exams, writing a random one-shot xD It's a songfic to AVTechNO!'s desire, sung by Miku. So I strongly advise listening to the song while reading it. It's lightly lemonesque twincest, but nothing too explicit.
As always, a huge thank you goes out to Sakagami Hina for proofreading it :D And thank you to everyone who takes the time to read, favourite and/or review it ^^
Disclaimer: The ownership of anything in this piece of writing? Don't have it. The song belongs to AVTechNO!
desire
The rest of the world is in peaceful slumber; evenly, rhythmically breathing in and out. A wide spectrum of dreams fills people's minds, their unconscious thoughts unrestrictedly taking form, imagination being the only limit. The cover of night has already fallen. A blanket of the darkest blue, painted with a million sparkling stars, tiny glittering diamonds. Underneath which unspeakable things can freely happen, between those who have been eagerly waiting for it to come and hide them from prying eyes. The only time when desire can leave behind its binding chains and fulfill itself. Over and over again, it's what I'm after: that which only you can give me. You're the key to break open the lock on those chains. The clock's ticking away; the moment I'm waiting for is drawing ever so near.
sameta watashi no karada
shiroi heya ni hitori
Cold... my body is so cold. From my toes to the tip of my nose, my skin is cold as marble. I'm all alone, there's nothing to warm me up in this room. Only four walls of pure white surround me. It's too dark inside to see, but I know. This white, it's just as cold as my body. This white, it's the unblemished colour of innocence. Oh, how ironic it is for me to be in here. Because this white, it had already lost its chastity.
uzuku watashi no karada
hayaku... aishite hoshii noni
It aches... my throbbing body. In every muscle, in every molecule of my being, I can feel it accumulating inside me. Anticipating it, goose bumps form on my skin. The longing for you keeps getting stronger. I restlessly twirl a lock of my long, teal hair around my finger. I strain my ears to perceive when your footsteps will carefully walk across the hallway. Hurry; I'm waiting for you. Always waiting. I just want to be loved; loved by you, my dear.
deattakoro no anata wa
itsumo autabi daitekureta
The you I come across during the day; whenever I meet you, you let me embrace you. In your arms is where I belong. Those strong arms that wrap around me, I never want them to release me. I recall the sensation of our skin touching as I wait for you to come tonight. Before I realize it, the imagined contact becomes a reality. An exhilarating reality; the fantasies fade in comparison.
atsuku bed wo kishimasete
toki wo wasuresasete kureta... anata...
Making the hot bed creak beneath us, the cold from before is but a faint memory now. The seconds, the minutes, they're all a blur as I lose track of them. You... you let me forget the passage of time. When I'm with you, there's only the eternal present.
ima mo anotoki no youni watashi wo daite hoshii
Now, just like "that time," I want you to hold me. Only that much is enough to satisfy me. To have our bodies entwine, so I can feel myself melt into your very being.
anata no senaka ni kizu wo tsuketai no
My hands crawl up along your body. My nails scrape the surface of your flesh. I want to create scars on your back. It's how I leave the memories for you. To prove that it's not a dream, when morning comes.
iroaseteiku jounetsu kodoku ni hitaru karada
As the passion is about to fade away, my body will be soaked in loneliness. The breaking dawn marks the end of the night and you must leave me soon. Only in the darkness can we stay together; we can't let the light shine upon our sin.
yubisaki de anatae no ai wo tashikameru hibi...
But every single day, each time you're with me, my fingertips confirm my love for you. I want you to always remember that we belong together, one soul split between two bodies.
uzukumaru karada wo sorashite mune ni te wo ate
Your body crouching over mine, you bring your hand to my chest. Underneath your delicate touch, my heart is still pounding wildly.
me wo tojite anata ni dakareru watashi...
Eyes slipping closed, I'm held by you. I need it; the warmth of your arms as they protectively embrace me. I don't want you to ever let go. But you must, for you have to leave me before the world awakes.
sabishisa to munashisa tono hazama de namida wo nagashi nureteiru nowa
watashi no karada
In this space between solitude and futility, the tears that fall are wetting my body. It hurts that you can't stay here. You gently brush away the drops staining me. My skin heats up again where your fingers pass. I want more of your fleeting touches. I want to feel that I belong to you, so the emotion of loneliness would disappear, once and for all, never to return again. If only we could brush away the day so easily instead, then these tears wouldn't have to drench me. You take my lips into a passionate kiss, to comfort me, to soothe me. I run my hands through your soft, teal hair, pulling you even closer to me.
kanjiru… hitori demo
kakushikirenai watashi no karada
I can still feel it, even though I'm alone now. You climb out of the bed and head towards the door. But it's too much to hide, my honest body. I can't hold it back; I'm too weak to suppress it.
hajirai mo pride mo subete
yokubou no mae dewa muimi ne
Shyness, and pride, too. All of it, they're meaningless in the presence of desire, aren't they? I grab onto your arm, I want you to stay a little longer. There's still some time left.
ecstasy ni sugaru watashi wo
mikudasanai de hoshii no...
The me that clings onto ecstasy... I don't want you to despise it. The desire is too strong, I can't control it. I don't want to, either, because I need you.
ima mo ano toki no youni watashi wo daite hoshii
Just like "that time," that first night, I want you to hold me now. Once more, one last time before the moment of parting comes.
anata no omosa wo kanjite itaino
I want to feel the weight of your existence. I pull you back onto the bed and you don't resist me. You're here with me now; it's all that matters, I don't need to think of anything else. You're my entire universe.
hakujou na itonami nado iranai watashi ga hoshii nowa
A cruel life isn't what I need. So we keep our crime a secret, hiding it from plain sight, instead indulging in it when others can't see. Because what I do want... more than anything...
anata no ai ga hoshii no…
I desperately want your love...
Your precious love keeps me alive. It's the oxygen in my lungs, the crimson blood in my veins, the strong beating of my heart. It's what I ceaselessly lust after and I know you do as well. That's why you'll be here again tomorrow night, too. And every night that follows.
Again and again, we'll give ourselves over to our sin, allow ourselves to be consumed by our insatiable desire.
