The bar isn't much, just one of a million others hole-in-the-wall places where brutes go for cheap alcohol and some brawling. Just the kind of place Sani hates, which is why Coco finds it rather interesting that Sani actually chose to meet here.

The way Sani's mouth twists in a slight sneer, nose scrunches and eyebrows draw together in a frown as he looks around the room is certainly the expected reaction. Which makes all the more puzzling why he would choose this place.

Coco takes a small sip from his class. The coconut-crab juice in this place is of surprising quality, which he assumes that Sani doesn't actually know from the way he winces and his fingers tighten on his own glass whenever Coco drinks. Coco's sure Sani only bought a glass because it would seem suspicious if he didn't buy or drink anything, not that Sani doesn't already stand out with his clean, almost shining appearance. Not to mention that his hair will make him stand out just about anywhere.

All in all, a shabby bar like this is actually an excellent place for talking about important matters undisturbed. As long as you drink, talk in a normal tone of voice and don't look too out of place, no one will spare you a second glance or try to listen in. Perhaps that's why Sani requested to meet him here, not that Coco can think of any sensitive information they need to discuss.

"Toriko and Matsu came to see me the other day," Sani finally says, breaking the silence between them. Coco blinks in surprise before he raises an eyebrow. Sani's here to talk about Toriko and Komatsu?

"Did they? Any particular reason?" He takes another sip from his glass as he watches Sani twirl a lock of hair around his finger — he always does that when he's thinking.

"Why, they wanted my help to capture an ingredient. When else does Toriko ever come visit?" Sani's says wrily and raises one of his own eyebrows in response, lips pursed.

"True enough," Coco says with a huff of laughter. Sani's absolutely right; Toriko generally doesn't come visit just for the sake of visiting.

"Matsu and I, however, we had a pretty good talk, actually." Now that's surprising. Coco can't really think of much that Sani and Komatsu would have to talk about, especially not something that Sani would consider having had a 'good talk' about after the fact.

"Really? What about?" Coco let's the surprise colour his voice. He's actually even more surprised when Sani actually takes a sip from the glass — blinking in surprise upon realising that the quality isn't that bad actually — before pursing his lips and twirling that lock of hair again. Slowly a smirk grows on Sani's lips, which makes Coco feel slightly uneasy. He's rather suspecting he won't like the answer to his question.

"Well, we talked about you, actually, Coco," Sani finally says, smirk still firmly on his lips and his eyebrow raised. A challenge. Coco frowns and his eyes narrow as he watches Sani.

"Did you now." It's not a question. Perhaps it should be, and perhaps his tone should be more polite, but he doesn't like the way Sani looks right now, especially as he's saying he had a talk with Komatsu about Coco.

"Mmm, yes." Sani straightens a bit in his chair, face becoming placid and his tone soft and smooth. He's still twirling that damn lock of hair around his finger. "He's worried about you, you know. Thinks you must be lonely." Sani's words make Coco blink in surprise. He hadn't expected Komatsu to be worried about him, but before he can say anything, Sani continues, "Of course, he doesn't know that your loneliness is all self-induced and I certainly didn't have the heart to tell him. But we both know you're only alone because you've made sure to be that way."

The words sting, because Coco knows very well what Sani's talking about. He grits his teeth just a bit, hardly noticeable from the outside except a small tick in his jaw. Of course Sani notices though, his eyes sharp and his mouth twisted downwards.

"We've already talked about this." Coco's words come out hard and clipped. He doesn't want to talk about this. Not again. It's hard every time and he doesn't want to keep ripping the wounds open.

"Yes, we have." Sani's voice is harsh and his eyes narrow slightly. "I used to think that maybe you would get over yourself and actually take a chance for once. Trust me. Trust us. I really should know better by now, shouldn't I, Coco? You're a coward." He's said that before, but it still smarts.

"I don't see how not being willing to risk your life, just for the sake of not being alone, is cowardly." Coco's said that before too. They've argued about this several times over the last few years, ever since a near kiss during a joint ingredient hunt made it clear that their attraction and feelings for each other were perhaps not as one-sided as they had previously believed.

"Hah! As if my life is not mine to choose what to do with! You wouldn't be risking anything, Coco, if anyone is taking a risk then it's me, and I would be willing risk it." Sani's fingers are pressing harder against the glass and his feelers — which he's kept to himself the entire time they've been in the bar — stretch out for a moment before they retract again.

"Sani..." Coco sighs in frustration, rubbing one hand over his face. Every time, Sani will say he's willing to risk his life for this, as if he places so little value in his own life that he would risk it for a relationship with Coco.

It's not that Coco has never been with anyone. He has. However… that was before the poison antibodies in his body started mixing and he became both poisonous and venomous. Since then he's kept to himself, unsure if he could keep a hold of his poison during moments of high emotions. He loses control when he's drunk, why would this be any different? He won't risk Sani's life for this, even if Sani is willing to.

"I'm tired, you know." Sani's words takes Coco by surprise, this is new, a deviation from how these conversations have gone before. "I'm tired of waiting and hoping that you'll get over this and actually give us a chance. We both know it's not that you don't want this. Us." Sani isn't looking at Coco anymore. He's staring out the window — the afternoon sun bathing him in gold — with a despondent facial expression. "So Coco… This is the last time. The last time I'll ever ask." Sani turns back to face Coco again, makes sure their eyes meet before he continues. "If you're that worried, let's just go to Life and… and have me inoculated against your usual poison. That way we safeguard against the risk of me being poisoned when we're together."

Coco opens his mouth, but before the almost reflexive 'No' can tumble out, he closes it again. Sani said that this was the last time. If Coco says no this time, Sani will never ask again and the possibility of it ever being them will be gone forever. There's a lump in his throat and he has trouble swallowing.

"Can I… think about it?" The words are slightly choked and Coco has a hard time to get them out at all. They're necessary though. He can't make a decision about this so quickly. If this is the last time, the last chance, then he has to be sure. He has to make a well thought-out decision.

"..." Sani's face is serious and he takes a sip from his glass before he actually says anything. "All right… Let's meet again here, one week from now. You can… give your answer then." He looks away then and Coco sees his adam's apple bob as he swallows.

"All right… a week from now then."

XOX

Coco lies in his bed, staring at the ceiling as thoughts whirl in his head. The sounds of Kiss's breathing and slight snoring is soothing, but not enough to help Coco sleep right now. He cannot forget the look on Sani's face. Coco doesn't like the realisation that his rejections, no matter their reason, have hurt Sani a lot.

No one likes to be rejected, of course, but that sadness... It reminds Coco of himself in his darker moments; when the loneliness of his self-imposed isolation bears down on him and he imagines dying alone and forgotten. Saying yes, accepting the companionship — and more — that Sani offers, would certainly ease those fears. Coco knows better than anyone how steadfast Sani can be. Not to mention how stubborn.

Still, it feels inexcusably selfish to accept Sani's offer when it places him at such risk. And the thought of having and losing seemed somehow even more awful and terrifying than never having at all.

The thought of Sani dying at his hands because he got careless…

The days continue on like that, a constant deliberation over whether or not accepting Sani's offer and the joy that would come with it could be worth the risk he'd put Sani in.

Coco has cursed himself for injecting so many poisons for antibodies a million times before and he's secluded himself as some sort of punishment for not pausing and considering the consequences of his actions, but also to forget how close he was to being declared a Dangerous Being and locked up — like Zebura. Of course, among all of them Zebura would be the one to care the least about being locked up.

No matter how he twists and turns his thinking, it all comes back to that same question: can he risk Sani's life for the sake of a relationship with physical intimacy?

XOX

The situation is exactly the same as it was one week ago. The bar is no less dirty, and there's a brawl breaking out in a corner of it. Coco and Sani have a glass of coconut-crab juice each. Sani has his hair in a long braid this time. He's absolutely beautiful, utterly amazing and everything Coco wants; Coco will turn him down. Will break his heart a final time. Will make the possibility of them turn into an impossibility.

His throat feels parched, but the juice doesn't seem to help. Perhaps the knot in it is to blame. Or maybe the way his guts seem to twist in agony.

"Coco… It's been a week. What's your answer?" Sani's words prompts Coco to drink again. His voice should be clear and steady when he answers.

He opens his mouth to answer, but as he does, the rays of the sun hits Sani's face just right, giving it an almost ethereal glow. Every fantasy Coco's ever had passes through his mind. Waking up to the sight of Sani's relaxed face as he's still asleep. Eating dinner after dinner together. Going to bed at night, feeling Sani curl up close.

Even though he had decided to say no, looking at Sani now, his heart rebels. His brain might say no, that he can't risk it, that seeing a death omen over Sani's head would surely destroy him, but his heart says that he should. It's what they both want and doesn't he deserve to be a bit selfish this once? Especially since it's actually what Sani wants too?

"Yes…" The word leaves his mouth before he can even finish settling his inner turmoil. "If we go to Life, if you inoculate yourself and get antibodies… then yes."

Sani's face goes slack with shock, his mouth a tiny circle and his eyes wide. It's almost painfully obvious that Sani expected him to say no. He expected to be turned down, to have his heart broken, but he still came.

The shock only lasts a moment before a smile spreads on Sani's lips and his cheeks gain colour. Coco has never seen him so happy before, it's like he's glowing.

Coco takes Sani's hand in his, marvelling at how warm his skin is, and laces their fingers together. There's no death omen above Sani's head and Coco's heart is pounding so hard in his chest it might burst.

He should have listened to his heart a long time ago.

XOX

They sit curled together on the couch, each with a book in hand and with the TV on. Coco finds that he has a hard time focusing on his book, and the news anchor's voice is just unintelligible background noise. He's acutely aware of the way Sani's leaning back on him and all the places their skin touch.

It's a nice and calm atmosphere in the room, but Coco can't help but feel restless. Even now, months since he finally agreed to Sani's proposition, weeks since Sani finished the inoculation against Coco's most common poison, there's something he can't get out of his mind.

"Sani?" he says, voice low and calm, betraying none of his real feelings.

"Mmm?" Sani doesn't look up from his book, but shimmies a bit to get Coco's arm to lay more comfortably across his shoulders.

"There's one thing I've been wondering about…" Perhaps Coco shouldn't drag this out, but he doesn't actually want to say anything until he has Sani's full attention.

"What?" Sani places a finger between the pages and closes his book before he turns his head to look at Coco.

"You've always been quite clear that you find poison absolutely disgusting, so why is it that you can stand to, want to, touch me at all?" He makes sure that it doesn't sound like an accusation. The last thing he wants is to make Sani angry.

Coco definitely doesn't expect the amused huff Sani lets out before he twists more fully, brings one hand up to stroke Coco's cheek before he pulls him into a soft kiss. He hums softly as their lips part before his lips twists into a small smirk.

"Poison can be an elegant to both incapacitate and kill someone. Done subtly and handled well, the target will be dead before it even knows it's coming." Which… is not what Coco expected Sani to say. It's also a bit creepy. "Now, a lot of poisons are super gross, I'm not gonna lie about that, Coco, but my main issue with yours has always been what a coward it turned you into. There are few things more disgusting than cowardice, so…" he trails off and pulls Coco into another kiss.

"Poison can be both elegant and disgusting, but as long as you're not being a coward about it, I can overlook the grosser parts of yours."

Sani's words are freeing in a way. Coco smiles briefly before he pulls Sani in a deep kiss. Sani twists around in his arms, their books falling to the floor with muted thuds, and kisses him back.

They stay like that for a while, kissing and stroking each other, before Coco lifts Sani and carries him into the bedroom.

XOX

The bedroom is silent aside from the sounds of their breathing. Coco lies awake, marvelling at the feeling of Sani's body curled into his, the feeling of their skin touching and the sight of the sun rising on Sani's sleeping face.

The fluttering of Sani's eyelids tells Coco he's about to wake up. Coco strokes Sani's cheek with gentle fingers and smiles when he finally opens his eyes.

"Good morning," he says and huffs out a laugh when Sani responds by hiding his face in the pillow and pushing at Coco's face with an elegant hand.

Joy flutters in his chest and Coco knows there's nowhere else he'd rather be and no one else he'd rather be with.

The End