Giving red light a green
I hold her picture in my hand while my mind drifts off to the day we met.
It would have been ten years this exact date. And it has been one year since she left me, this exact date.
I never should have agreed on that surgery. I knew she wasn't strong enough. But the way she was going was no life either.
So now I blame myself for loosing her, just like Shanon. They weren't meant to go. I've lost too many people before her. Shannon… Kelly… and now Jen…
I made the stupid mistake of searching for a replacement for Shannon. Three ex-wives and Jenny… although she was not a mistake.
When I told her I missed her I meant it. But there was no 'off the job'. She was straight forward about that. Yet in the end she softened up. Standing in her hallway with that shawl around her arms I should have know. I should have picked up the signs when she said that once she wouldn't have taken no for an answer. Some kind of investigator I am.
She slipped away under my nose. And there was not a damn thing I could do. Except to tell her to get that surgery. I didn't want a life without Jen, lovers or not… As long as she was in my life.
Hollis… I think she was the worst mistake of all of them. Well, at least I didn't marry her. Both Shannon and Jen would have kicked my ass if I did.
But I've got to get on with my life now. She's a red… and she's a fine one… Don't want my girls to kick my butt after all. Not to mention Kelly… I bet those three are having a great time up there. My three redheads.
I look upon the new woman in my life. Yes… she's a redhead and yes, I do love her… It's time to let go… I'll never forget the women I cared for… But it's time to move on… I'll always love you… He kissed the new woman in his life and he felt good for the first time after Jenny
***
"You think he's gonna be alright?" The red asked as she held her daughter.
"He's gonna be fine." The other one smiled down.
"Is she a red head, mummy?" A little voice asked with a yawn.
"She is baby." Her mother soothed her.
"Then he's gonna be just fine." She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. "I love you daddy."
