A sequel to "Kurt's Goodbye" in Blaine's point of view. Get those tissues out again :/ (I don't know why I like to write this sad stuff but I just do)
It seemed like any ordinary sunny day outside the short, overly gelled hair boy's window. But he didn't see that way. The only thing he saw outside that window was darkness. That's what everyday looked like to him now that everything in his seemingly perfect little world went crashing down as reality came back around and broke it all. At least, to him he felt it was all over. He missed it all, the sunny days, his smiling face, his eyes, his adorable quirks, and those sinfully skin tight jeans. Now that he was gone, he had nothing to live for. Blaine just missed Kurt's everything, but that didn't matter anymore, he could miss him all he wants, but none of him would come back. He just wished he could have been there, if he had gotten to the door ten seconds sooner, he could have saved him from making the only mistake he couldn't fix…death. Blaine had been tearing himself down ever since the incident, telling himself it was all his fault. Others would tell themselves it wasn't their fault, but Blaine couldn't do it. Because it was his fault.
He loved Kurt, more than anything or anyone and that's why he had to do it. He had to let go of him. He thought it would help Kurt. He had been struggling so much and having a boyfriend that went to a different school was too much for him. Blaine thought Kurt was under to much stress, and he thought Kurt would understand that he did it for him…he thought he would understand why he broke up with him. Blaine didn't want to, he had to. There was no time anymore, and Kurt seemed so distant. His mind told him that Kurt was drifting away and didn't want him anymore anyway, so it would make it easier. But he was all wrong.
Blaine knew now that their relationship was the only thing Kurt had left to cling onto the edge of life. The break up was the thing that made Kurt let go. The thing that was so hard for Blaine to do, was the thing that Kurt used as an excuse to say goodbye forever. And Blaine wishes everyday he could have done something about it. If only Kurt had told him what was so wrong with his life that he wanted to end it, he could have helped. He could have saved Kurt. And he could continue to love him. If he had saved Kurt he wouldn't be tying that rope to the sealing. And he wouldn't have jumped off the chair…
