The two of them are a mockery of their long-ago relationship, that had since fallen through. He had gotten over them as a couple, and was ready to give up and move on ("Shinji, you're as bad as me. I know you hate those people you hang around. That's where it happened.") but, Akihiko held on too tightly, wanted what Shinjiro wanted too, but they could never again attain what they had so many years ago.

So they waste their time looking back wistfully to that time when they were so close. Akihiko tries, he tries to hard at everything, from boxing to the Dark Hour to his friends. 'He's so dedicated.' It takes a lot of dedication to be willing to fight for an already failed relationship. From the start, it was all desperate kisses stolen in the darkness of Shinjiro's room, Akihiko finding refuge in his calloused touches.

Neither of them was open about their relationship (but Mitsuru knew, of course she knew, she knew everything, saw everything at night). Shinjiro was secretive by nature and Akihiko had his reputation to keep up. But the nicknames still come, years later, so easily and familiarly to their lips.

"Shinji…"

"Aki."

Their relationship is a lost cause, first loves falling out of love and growing apart. Shinjiro knew what was coming with the suppressants, kept it a secret. It only Akihiko could hate him…

"It's not true, Shinji! You don't 'fall out of love'! Tell me…tell me the truth. Don't I deserve that?" It's pitiful, the way proud Akihiko take it all upon himself. He is the one who tried to draw Shinjiro back from his solitary existence; he was the one doing all the work.

"Just what I said, Aki. Drop it."

He'll give in eventually, he knows he will. Akihiko needs closure, at least, before Shinjiro up and dies. 'Aki would never forgive me…'