To Learn about Loss is to Learn About Life
The morning dawned, bright and chipper in the village of Konoha. Birds were singing in the trees, the sounds of voices sounded outside of excited children, shouting and laughter ringing through the air. The windows were open in the Uchiha home, blowing in the fresh summer breeze. The village was busy with it's usual weekend hustle and bustle. The sun shone vividly in the cloudless, azure sky.
Sasuke Uchiha sat quietly at the kitchen table, hands folded to his mouth, staring blankly at the Sunday paper in front of him while his young daughter finished her breakfast. His plate of food still sat in front of him, but untouched. His wife, Sakura, was busy cleaning up the mess made from breakfast. Not a peep was coming from any of the Uchiha, but Sasuke didn't miss the small glances that came periodically from his little girl at the other end of the table. He didn't miss the subtle nuances of her tugging at her red framed glasses, or her pushing them up the bridge of her nose in attempts to peer at her more solemn than usual father.
"Sasuke?" Sakura's voice sounded from behind him. "You didn't touch your food." She observed quietly for a moment, standing next to her husband.
"Sorry. Not hungry today I guess," was all he responded with, and he knew he sounded cold, but he wasn't exactly in the mood to sit and carry on a cheerful conversation with anyone, in truth. The day outside definitely did not define how he was feeling on the inside. At least if it had been dark or stormy and rainy today, then it might at least mirror his mood in some way.
"I hope you're not coming down with anything," Sakura stated worriedly as she reached out and removed the plate from in front of her husband. "I'll save this for you for later then. Maybe you'll feel like eating something in awhile."
"I'm done!" a 6 year old Sarada Uchiha piped up, pushing her plate back from her, and Sasuke gazed down at her plate as the young girl started to jump up from her seat. " It's so nice out there! Can I go outside today, Mama?"
"Sarada," Sasuke's deep voice spoke up, maybe sounding a bit more intimidating than he had intended. "What do we do with our plates when we're done eating?"
Sarada bowed her head slightly and blushed behind her spectacles. "I'm sorry, Papa. I forgot. We rinse them off and put them in the sink," she replied shyly, retrieving her plate from the table and walking as fast as she could get away from her father, not wanting to further anger him.
"Sasuke, what is it with you today?" Sakura questioned her husband as Sarada brought her plate to the sink, just barely reaching it enough to rinse off her own plate. She couldn't help but notice just how far away Sasuke seemed today. "You don't seem like yourself at all."
"I'm fine," he responded coldly before standing up from his seat and walking past the two girls standing together at the sink, not bothering to acknowledge either one like he normally did, even if it was subtle. Sakura stared at him, emerald green eyes widened in shock. "I'm going for a walk." He grabbed his long, black traveling cloak down from the coat rack, swung it swiftly over his shoulders and was out the door in a flash. Sarada peeked around from her mother's side as she watched her father leave. The door slammed shut a little harder than it should have, causing both Sakura and Sarada to jump. Clearly he wasn't fine.
"Mama, did we do something to make him mad?" Sarada asked her mother worriedly, staring up at her, her hand clutching Sakura's white arpon and tugging at it slightly.
Sakura sighed and looked down at her daughter's concerned expression. "I don't know what's wrong with him today. He seemed just fine yesterday, but it's like something is bothering him. It's hard to figure your father out sometimes when he won't talk." She gazed upward, her eye catching the calendar hanging on the wall next to the fridge. Sakura's felt her blood run cold as her eyes stared at the date circled on the calendar. Today's date. The date circled on the calendar... no wonder Sasuke wasn't himself today. The significance of that date. "Ohhhh," she breathed, slamming a hand to her forehead. "I am so stupid. SO stupid," she chided herself, and Sarada stood there with her head tilted slightly, one eyebrow raised looking at her mother.
"Okay, Mama, I'm ready for an explanation," the young Uchiha child stated firmly, folding her orange-clad arms over her chest. "Why are you and Papa being so... so strange today!"
Sakura's eyes widened as she whirled around to stare at her younger daughter, and she couldn't help but laugh at just how much Sarada looked and sounded like Sasuke right at that very moment. The typical eyebrow raise, the arms folded, the irritated expression, but her temper was bordering on her own. "I'm sorry, Sarada. Maybe it's time you knew about why your Papa gets like this sometimes." Sakura sat down in one of the chairs at the table and patted her lap for Sarada to come and join her. The little girl quickly hopped up into her mother's lap. "I think it's time you learn about your Grandma and Grandpa Uchiha and your Uncle Itachi."
Sarada's curious eyes rounded out even more as she studied her mother's features conspicuously. "I've heard Papa mention them a few times, and whenever I asked, he'd poke me in the forehead and tell me 'some other time, Sarada' before walking away," she added, rubbing at the middle of her forehead.
Sakura smiled. "Yes. You see, your Uncle Itachi used to do that to your Papa all of the time. Uncle Itachi is your Papa's older brother, you see. Your Grandma Mikoto and Grandpa Fugaku are your Papa's Mom and Dad, just like we are to you and just like Grandma Mebuki and Grandpa Kizashi are my Mom and Dad."
"When do I get to meet them!" Sarada asked her mother anxiously, small hands brought up into excited fists near her face, much like Sakura used to do when she was younger.
"Well, that's the thing. You can't meet them. Not for a very long time," Sakura sighed sadly as she put her arms around her daughter and squeezed her close. "You see, Uncle Itachi and your Grandma and Grandpa died a long time ago when your Papa was just a boy."
Sarada gasped and pulled back from her mother's embrace. "You mean they're already gone and I'll never get to meet them?" her eyebrows drew upward in a pout.
Sakura nodded her rose-colored head sadly. "That's right, dear. I'm sure that's where your Papa is right now. He is most likely visiting the Uchiha Cemetery right now. That's where they're buried at along with the rest of his family and clan." Sakura pushed the bridge of her daughter's glasses up her small nose. "You see, today is the anniversary of Uncle Itachi's passing, and so your Papa probably just wants to go and visit where he's buried. It's something he's done for a very long time, every since he and I have been together. I usually go with him, but I guess he wanted to be alone today."
Sarada scruched up her thin, black eyebrows. "Papa shouldn't be alone today, Mama. He needs us!" She jumped off of her mother's lap and ran to the front door.
"Sarada! Wait! Where are you going?" the rosette called out to her young daughter.
"It's alright, Mama! I'll be back later!" the little ebony-haired girl called out as she tugged on her sandals. "I have something I need to do!" Sakura watched her daughter's onyx eyes twinkling, and she knew that look. Sarada had something up her sleeve, and as tempted as she was to follow her girl, something told Sakura that maybe she should let this one go. She watched the little girl rush out the front door excitedly.
"What on earth has gotten into her all of a sudden?" Sakura questioned out loud to no one but herself as she watched Sarada out of the window, rush away from their home.
Sarada raced down the busy streets, ignoring all the people calling out to her or the sounds of the kids playing in the park as she ran by. She had her mind set on something else that was far more important. Her little legs burned as she sprinted as fast she could, finally approaching the place she wanted to be, and that right in front of Yamanaka Flower Shop. Sarada opened up the doors and stepped inside, her little cheeks flushed red from running, and she bent over placing her hands on her knees, breathing heavily.
"Sarada!" came a familiar, sweet voice that the young Uchiha girl had come to love. "What on earth are you doing here and why are you so out of breath?" A woman glad in purple with long, waist-length blond hair and a fringe of bangs falling over one side of her face walked around the counter and crouched down in front of the child..
"Aunty-Ino-today-is-really-important," Sarada panted and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her sweaty nose.
"Alright, alright. Calm down now and catch your breath and then you can tell me what's so important," Ino replied as she stood up and placed a hand on Sarada's shoulder, leading her over to a chair behind the counter so the small girl could sit down.
"I had to get here as fast I could. I really really need flowers today, Aunty Ino!" the young girl insisted, her eyes wide with persistence and Ino was taken slightly aback.
"What on earth do you need flowers for, hun?" Ino questioned after Sarada had finally caught her breath.
"Well you see, I learned in school that when someone dies, you bring flowers to where they're buried at, and so I need to get flowers! I need three of them!" Sarada insisted. "And I need to hurry!"
"Flowers for when someone dies?" Ino inquired, hands on her hips and thoroughly confused. "Now who, pray tell, died and needs flowers?"
"It's for my Uncle Itachi and Grandma and Grandpa Uchiha!" Sarada's little face scrunched up frustratingly. "But I have to hurry or I might miss out on finding Papa and giving them their flowers!"
"Oh... oh my goodness," Ino breathed staring down at the small, determined girl in front of her. Sarada tried not to notice the tears that had began gathering in her Aunt Ino's eyes. She didn't have time for that today as much as she loved her Aunty, but Papa was more important right now and she had to go find him and bring them all flowers. "Okay, we'll get you some flowers for your Uncle and your grandparents," Ino stated shakily as she turned her back on Sarada and began walking towards the sorts of flower arrangements while wiping tears away from her eyes, and Sarada wondered absentmindedly why on earth Aunty Ino was crying. All she wanted was some flowers. "How about some white chrysanthemums? They're beautiful and have a lot of meaning to them." Ino spoke up, her voice much clearer.
"Those are perfect!" Sarada cheered as Ino handed her small bundle of three, fully bloomed, pure white chrysanthemum flowers. "I have to go get these to Papa right away so we can give one to Uncle Itachi and Grandma and Grandpa Uchiha!" Her little face fell as she realized she left her money purse at home. "Aunty Ino, I forgot to bring my money with me."
"That's alright, Sarada," Ino ruffled the little girl's hair. "You don't have to pay for them this time. It's on the house. Besides, these are special flowers for very special people, right?" She smiled at her little adopted niece and winked one blue eye at her playfully. " Now you better get going! Tell your Mama I said hi when you see her and to stop by and see me, okay?"
"You bet! Thanks, Aunty Ino!" Sarada thanked the older woman before rushing out of the door and down the street once more to the outskirts of the village.
Sarada remembered that there was a cemetery out this way, but the one in particular that stood out in her mind was the one near the ruins of where the Uchiha Clan's small village had once resided just outside of the Leaf. In that area, there was an old rickety fence that had surrounded a lot of different sizes and shapes of gravestones and wooden crosses. On that fence hung the Uchiha family's crest, and so Sarada, using her sharp intel, knew that this was where her Papa would be. She slowed down her running to a fast walk, heart pounding heavily in her chest as she approached the cemetery. The familiar Uchiha crest came into view on the rickety fence as trees surrounded the area. A light breeze was blowing the leaves on the trees. The sunlight peeking through casting various patterns of light and shadows scattered across the ground.
The little Uchiha girl's heart skipped a beat as she caught sight of a dark cloaked figure knelt down in front of three particular gravestones. They appeared to be the largest ones out of all the many gravestones scattered about in the cemetery. Gasping quietly, she hurriedly hid behind a tree and peered around it, instantly knowing it was her Papa. The breeze picked up, blowing back his coat in waves, his black, spiky hair brushed back from the sides of his face. Sarada could see his mouth moving, and she snuck behind another tree, still holding the flowers safely in her hands so she could get a better listen of what her Papa was saying.
"You should see Sarada," Sasuke's voice resounded, deep and husky. "She's growing up so fast. Too fast sometimes. She's too smart for her own good. She's already started at the academy and has excelled so much. She studies hard, just like we did, Itachi. Though, I gotta admit, she's picked up one of her mother's not-so-desirable traits," Sasuke chuckled lightly. "Reminds me of you sometimes, Mom. Her and Sakura, they can both get a little scary."
Sarada giggled behind her hand at this revelation. So she scared her Papa, huh? She'd have to remember that one and tell Mama all about it when she got home.
"You should see Sakura too. She's changed so much from when we were all kids," Sasuke spoke back up. "She's grown up from an annoying fangirl obsessed with everything I did to become the best medical ninja in Konoha, and she can pack a punch too. Literally. She's quite the konoichi, and I'm beyond proud of her. She works a full time job and then some at the hospital and is the head medical nin in the hospital. She even surpassed her own master," Sasuke stated with a sense of pride in the tone of his voice.
"Tsunade taught her well, what with her being a legendary Sannin and all, I guess it's no surprise. I wish you could have met her and got to know her. She turned out to be something I never thought she would. She gave us Sarada too, and I'm proud to call her my wife." Sasuke paused for a moment and Sarada watched a small smile appear on her father's face. "You know, she wears our family crest proudly on her back, just like my daughter does," Sasuke sighed and he reached a hand out to one of the stones. His fingertips grazing it ever so lightly. "I know it's been a long time, but I miss you all so much. Especially you, Itachi. I wish you could have known both Sakura and Sarada. You would be proud to call them Uchiha."
Sarada listened closely and quietly as she drew her knees up to her chest from behind the tree she was positioned at. Her father had now grown quiet, and the little girl was feeling her eyes getting droopy. She'd give him just a moment alone and rest her eyes for just a minute, not sure why she was suddenly feeling so sleepy...
She closed her eyes for just a moment, and heard a strange sound, like the wind had picked up violently, but was not blowing her hair or her clothes or even her. She opened her eyes to find herself engulfed in a brilliant, white world. She shielded them with her hand, allowing them to adjust to the overwhelming light, and squinted as she spotted something in the distance. Three figures were approaching her. Sarada tilted her head curiously, unsure if she should run or stay put, but something told her she wasn't in any immediate danger.
The three figures had now taken a full shape in front of her and Sarada studied each of their faces closely, her eyes squinting as she took in each of their features. There was a woman there with long, black hair falling to the middle of her back. She wore a blue dress with a tan colored apron tied around it. There were two men on either side of her, both taller than her. One with shorter, dark hair dressed in a kimono and pants reaching barely above his ankles. Another one was dressed in a red robe wrapped around his body, his long, black hair tied into a ponytail. The one with the ponytail appeared younger than the other two. She noticed each one of them had the same face-framing bangs that hung down the sides of their faces and to the ends of their jaws. They also all had the exact same onyx black eyes as her Papa and herself. Each of them were smiling at her.
Sarada gasped. "I... you are, you can't be, can you?" The little girl stammered, staring up at all of them, unsure of what to say or think.
"Well, I don't know who else we would be, Sarada Uchiha," the man with the ponytail spoke up first. "But maybe we ought to tell you who we are. These two people next to me are Fugaku and Mikoto Uchiha, your grandparents. And I'm-," he began to speak but Sarada cut in.
"Oh! OH! You're Uncle Itachi! You must be! Mama told me about you! Every time I would ask Papa about you, he'd poke me in the forehead and say 'some other time, Sarada' and it always made me so mad!"
Itachi laughed and rubbed at the back of his head. "I'm sorry about that. That's something I sort of used to do your father all of the time when we were growing up. I guess it passed on to him."
"Wait? You used to do that to Papa... So you are Uncle Itachi? And Grandma? And Grandpa too? Mama told me that you guys died... so if you died, how are you here with me right now?" Sarada folded her arms once more and surveyed each one of them much like her father used to when he wasn't so sure if he could trust someone or something.
Itachi, Mikoto and Fugaku all chuckled warmly at the confused little person standing in front of them. "I suppose you could be dreaming and your subconscious called to us, sweetheart," Mikoto smiled warmly down at her granddaughter. "Oh, Sarada Uchiha, look at you! You look so much like your father." She stooped down to eye level in front of her and ran her fingertips tenderly down the side of Sarada's face. "Look at her, Fugaku. She's so much like our Sasuke."
Fugaku gave a short nod, followed by a small smile at his little granddaughter standing in front of him, and Sarada stared back up at him. He seemed to be less of an affectionate man. Not much like her Mama or her Papa at all, really, but she could see the pride showing in her grandpa's black eyes. "Indeed. I would not have expected any less from the newest member of the Uchiha Clan." He gave Sarada a knowing wink, causing the girl to burst into a wide smile.
"She has the look of her mother too and just as beautiful as her mother," Itachi pointed out, smiling making Sarada beam with joy.
"I've been studying real hard at the academy too, just like Papa and Mama did!" Sarada jammed a thumb proudly into her chest. "I'm at the top of all my classes and Papa has even taught me how to master the Fireball Jutsu technique already!"
"Well then. That's my girl," Fugaku spoke up proudly, placing a large hand on top of Sarada's head.
All three of her family members stood smiling at her with the same looks of pride her Papa would give her when she would bring home perfect marks on her homework and top test scores. It was also the same look he had given her when she very first mastered the Fireball technique. This made Sarada's heart swell in her chest.
"She is definitely her father's daughter," Itachi grinned as he stooped down now as well to eye level with his niece. "We are so proud of you, Sarada. I'm sure your Papa is very proud of you as well."
Sarada stopped for a moment, staring at Itachi, studying the lines engraved into his face and her little face fell. "Papa is really sad today, Uncle Itachi."
The smile faded from Itachi's face and was replaced with a soft look of concern. "Why is your Papa sad today, Sarada?"
"Well, it's because of you guys. He really misses you all." Sarada stood thoughtfully for a moment, before he eyes began lighting up and her face brightened once more. "Hey! I have an idea! Maybe you all could come back with me for just a little bit and go see Papa! If he saw you guys it might cheer him up!" Itachi stood up and exchanged brokenhearted glances with his parents. Sarada did not miss the expressions on any of their faces. "You can't come with me, can you?" she confirmed sadly. "But if Papa doesn't see you, he might never get happy again."
"Now, Sarada. You know that's not true," Mikoto told her granddaughter gently, brushing back strands of hair that had fallen onto the little girl's forehead. "Sometimes when people miss someone a whole lot, they feel sad for a little while, but it's not forever. Your Papa will feel better very soon, and besides," she grinned and tapped the little girl on her nose.
Itachi crouched down once more. "Your Papa has something very important in his life right now that would easily make him happy," he finished for his mother, giving her a knowing glance and Mikoto smiled happily.
"Really? What is that?" Sarada asked, scruching her nose up and pushing the bridge of her glasses back up her nose once more.
"Why it's you, of course," Itachi told his young niece reaching out to poke her gently on the forehead, just like her Papa did and just like he used to do for Sasuke. "You and your Mama. You both make your Papa, my little brother, very happy and that's saying something because it's hard to make your Papa happy," Itachi chuckled causing Sarada to giggle herself.
"Uncle Itachi, can I ask you something?" Sarada began nervously, staring down at her sandaled feet. Itachi gave her a small nod followed by a 'hmm' sound. "I was just wondering... how did you all die? Papa won't tell me and neither will Mama, so I thought maybe you could."
"Sarada, when the time is right, your Papa will tell you what happened, but for now, you shouldn't worry about such things as that," Itachi explained gently. "Those things aren't important."
"Sarada," Fugaku began to speak, leaning down toward his granddaughter and changing the subject. "We have to be going soon, but I have a message that I want you to give your father from me. Can you do that?"
"Yes, Grandpa. I can do that," Sarada nodded her raven head seriously, her onyx eyes staring up sincerely into his own.
"Tell your Papa 'Well done, my son. I'm very proud of you'," Fugaku told her. "Can you remember that?"
"Yes, Grandpa. I can remember that," Sarada replied as the man stood tall once more. She looked over at her Uncle and her Grandma, both still smiling at her, but this time, their smiles appeared somewhat sad. "It's time for you to go now, isn't it?"
"I'm afraid so, Sarada. I'm sorry, but we only have very limited time to be here with you. When you wake up, your Papa is going to need you, so you have to go and be with him and your Mama because we can't be there for them like you can anymore," Itachi explained gently and Sarada could feel her eyes burning. She couldn't stop the tears that had welled up and leaked out from behind her glasses. "Hey now," her Uncle said gently as he brought his fingertips up and wiped the tears that were streaming down her face now.
"I'm sorry," Sarada hiccuped and squeezed her onyx eyes shut. Her uncle's warm, solid hands did not move away from her face.
"Don't be sorry. It's okay to cry. Especially if someone you love is leaving, or if you miss someone who's already gone. Lots of people do. It's not a bad thing," he told her with a softness in his tone that sometimes reminded her of how her Papa would talk to her Mama when Mama was upset or sad.
"Papa doesn't," Sarada replied indignantly through her tears, and Itachi laughed.
"Well, your Papa is a special case. He's always been hopelessly bad at showing what he feels on the outside," Itachi replied.
Sarada threw herself into the arms of Itachi and her grandmother, while Fugaku stood near and placed his hand once more on top Sarada's head. "I know you have to go, but I don't want you to. I wish I could have more time with all of you. Papa misses you so much and he needs to see you guys too. It's not fair that he can't see you either," the little Uchiha girl sobbed into her Uncle's shoulder. She had taken an instant liking to Itachi and didn't want him to go, and more than anything she wanted her Papa to see him again, because she knew today was the anniversary of Itachi's death. If only there were some way... but Sarada knew that it was futile, sad as it made her feel.
"Tell your Papa we all love and miss him very much, Sarada," Mikoto told her granddaughter gently, as the little Uchiha girl pulled back from Itachi's shoulder and sniffled. Mikoto leaned forward and gave her a gentle kiss on the forehead.
"We'll see him again some other time," Itachi replied, poking Sarada on the forehead once more and smiled at her. She felt her grandfather's fingers squeeze the top of her head gently and she gazed up at him with a watery gaze. Their images were slowly fading away now.
"We all love you, Sarada and we are so proud of you," her grandmother told her as they began to draw back, further and further and further until they were gone from her sight.
"Goodbye Uncle Itachi, Grandma Mikoto and Grandpa Fugaku," Sarada sniffled, wiping the tears from her face and everything darkened around her.