Disclaimer: Bleach is property of Kubo-sensei.
A/N: If this is totally rushed out, well its because I have intended for it to be as such. First time writing Ren/Tat fic, I love this pair so much even though it will never happen, but it matters little. Hope you guys like it! Sorry for it being rushed though, it just seemed to work well in my head. Totally OCC and such. Enjoy!
~In Bloom~
Our love blends in different shades of colours.
He was heartbroken, feeling like a mediocre guy for ever attempting to get his feelings across the only girl he had thought to love for so long. She had announced her marriage on a spring morning when the sun barely glared on the ground, as the sweet smell of cherry blossoms fragranced his peaceful awakening and his brain barely had the knowledge to process the news. That small voice cut through each single fibre of his entire being, her words cut through the shreds of his now empty heart; it had been so unreal and almost funny.
"I can entrust her into your care, Kurosaki Ichigo." Kuchiki Byakuya expressed emotionlessly, as he sat on the corner of the meeting room.
"Thank you, Nii-sama," Rukia and Ichigo both bowed, before quickly leaving the room just as they held hands without taking notice of him.
Abarai Renji had vowed his head, merely unable to understand why it had happen in such way just before last night, when he had confessed his feelings for her. Spring could not end soon, summer would mean that his love would extinguish entirely as they would get married then. Maybe it was a punishment for taking centuries to come into the conclusion to confess everything. It was foolish as he disappeared, ran with all his might to the empty forest, choking on air before collapsing like a hurt frail girl.
He did not cry though, a man like him had a pride to hang onto, but could not accept it entirely. The green grass became his sanctuary of peace; it was where his crestfallen face could be shown alone and to no one else. False words continued to trail further and further into easily made up lies, Renji could not bring himself to express his annoyance to Rukia; who continued to drag the subject of her marriage to his face. It was suffocating having to put that mask on, false praise and smiles were enough to handle in front of the crowd.
"Why didn't you tell her before?" Matsumoto Rangiku sat with him, alone in his quarters as they enjoyed their weekly meetings to drink sake. "But, I can't blame you. No one would've deduced that it would end up like that, I mean, and that she would decide to marry Ichigo."
"Must you bring him up into the conversation?" He muttered, annoyed that even his friends dragged it around and rubbed it on his face.
The strawberry blond shinigami shrugged, barely enjoying drinking tonight. "I know it hurts, but you have to face the truth. Maybe even if you had told her before, Rukia-chan would've just rejected your feelings."
The red headed shinigami sighed, pushing his small cup away and stared at the bright moon. Maybe she was right, Rukia had never considered him more than just a friend; it always stayed the same way. Though, wallowing up in self pity would never help at all. Not many were able to believe that false pretence though, the ever emotionless noble captain, notice the change of mood in him. Byakuya watched with a careful eye his vice-captain; the red headed shinigami was more serious than ever, doing his tasks without complaining and usually enjoyed doing missions out in Seireitei, but most of all, he was avoiding his adoptive sister.
"Abarai," the noble man called on him, right before he would step out of the office to leave for the day.
He stopped right before opening the door, turning back to stare at his captain with a vacant expression; the one marring his expression lately.
"Yes, Kuchiki-taichou?" he answered, with a much equal monotone voice.
As expressionless as he could be, Byakuya was alarmed by his newfound attitude. "Seat, there's a matter to discuss." He would not let any emotion be shown though, even if he wanted to show his care for his vice-captain.
"Is there something the matter?" He questioned, taking a seat in front of the admirable figure in his life.
The raven haired man shifted on his chair briefly. "Yamamoto-soutaichou has requested someone to be sent to the real world for a mission."
Renji raised his gaze briefly, meeting with his grey eyes. His captain was usually calm, but he was always that kind of man to never show emotion to the rest of the world; much less his own vice-captain.
"I am deciding that you should be the one," the captain continued. "There is no one else suitable to do so, Rukia would be next, but for reasons already known to you she cannot leave Soul Society until everything is over."
There was a tinge of jealousy that pulsated on his veins, Renji grimaced slightly, grinding his teeth with the notion to shout, but refrained from doing so.
"When?" he expressed vacantly, trying to hide his anger.
"In two days, you are to return until further notice," Byakuya said, pulling out the documents on the mission. "Everything is written inside in detail, you will tell no one about it and must leave alone to do this."
"Very well, I will do so." He vowed, standing up. "If you'll excuse me, I must take my rest for the night."
The raven haired man watched simply as his figure disappeared behind the door, his footsteps vanishing in the silence of the sixth division quarters. It was best to send him away for a while, whatever had happen to make Abarai Renji change was taking a great toll on his priorities and Byakuya did not want him to turn into an incompetent fool or watch him slowly destroying himself.
"Renji, are you alright?" Rukia asked, as the two sat on the gardens of the thirteenth division.
"Fine as a tiger," Renji replied, not looking at her concern expression painted on her pretty face. "Nice spring days, aren't they?"
The raven haired woman sighed, nodding silently as they stared at the blue sky. She knew that something troubled her long time friend, but failed to obtain an answer to his odd behaviour.
"Hey, did you hear about Hitsugaya-taichou asking Ichigo to allow him and Karin to date?" She asked, feigning her usual peppy disposition.
The red headed shinigami turned briefly, a smirk painted on his lips, but did not reach his eyes. "I heard, could've sworn that that stupid Strawberry would bankai Hitsugaya-taichou's ass for that, but was disappointed that he was rather submissive about it."
"Yeah, I told him to let it go and let them be," she sighed in dismal, touched by their display of such romantic love life. "It'll be great, once summer comes."
Renji sharply jerked to stare at the garden again, hiding his expression from her. She was like that now, rubbing her romance with Ichigo on his face without noticing that it hurt him a great deal, but he refused to say anything. It would be pointless to tell her anything now, she was so deeply in love with the orange haired semi-permanent shinigami and did not want to hurt those feelings or make her doubt. He had sworn during the winter war ten years ago to never allow a painful expression to cross her features; Renji would certainly hurt himself if he did.
"Yeah, isn't that nice?" He muttered bitterly, finding it almost impossible to hide the pain.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" She was baffled by his response, in fact, she was annoyed. "Why are you acting like a moody woman in her period?"
The man stood up, glaring at her. "Never mind you, see you. There are other things I need to do." He did not wait for Rukia to answer; simply he wanted the ground to swallow him up for slipping like that.
Spring continued to grow in such beautiful way, no one had known about his departure from Soul Society and Renji was exceptionally glad about that. It would be impossible to handle that pain, it would've been difficult if Rukia had showed up, but was glad to leave in peace.
The real world greeted him with the same disposition, nothing much had change aside from the advances of technology and ideas, but he was able to keep up with it. Deceiving the world was easy, especially when he had asked his old friends, Ishida Uryuu and Yasutora Sado to help him find a job and a place to live in.
"Isn't Inoue-san still living here?" he asked as he and Ishida stood in front of the apartment where the caramel haired woman lived.
Ishida pushed his glasses up. "She resides in Tokyo now, working as a nurse in a hospital that my father owns."
"Oh," was all he could say.
His job in a local bar had been about the only thing available and one with a good paying check, plus he was good with the whole mixing drinks. It paid well and it kept him alive, but the idea of the mission seemed almost insignificant and quite pointless. More human customs research was truly uninteresting, what was there to learn? Flamboyant fashion, luxurious expenses...not much that Soul Society could use.
Spring ended in a bitter note, summer began with a black eye given to him as a gift from a client after a very erroneous mistake. Renji sometimes hated his position though, but was thankful that the manager of the club had not fired him after he had thrown a punch to the client. It seemed that the old man had taken a like for him, trusted him with many things and he took his position as a normal human quite well.
"Abarai, take them to table five," Kohei, another barman, pushed the tray to him.
"Going," he finished making the martini for the woman that was miserably failing at flirting with him, but was thankful to leave for a moment.
The bar was fairly chill, soft music played instead of loud tunes—it was calming for him. Though, he did not put more thought to it than necessary, as he reached the table and set the drinks down, ignoring the people around the table.
"Wait, bring us three more cosmopolitans please," a docile voice said, as the red headed shinigami pulled out his notebook. "Also, we want the fries with extra cheese."
"Miho, aren't you going a bit overboard with that?" He stared at a dark haired woman; her rich voice caught his attention. "Just bring us the fries; my friend here is a bit slow in the head."
"Of course, one order of fries coming up," he smirked, forgetting for a moment his problems and enjoyed as the woman grinned.
The summer nights were always hot, he wiped his forehead as he threw the garbage into the dump and close the lid, leaning against the wall and pulled the fabric of his white shirt from his chest; it was slightly too hot for comfort. It was shortly past two in the morning, the bar had been emptied out an hour before and he was left to clean the entire place.
Now, he only had to close the place for the day and go home to get some sleep; it was that long of a day and tomorrow—or rather today, he needed to visit the store to purchase food and go pay a visit to that crazy cheap shopkeeper Urahara.
"Normal humans don't linger about alone in the dark, Abarai" a familiar voice expressed, making him open his eyes and met with the black haired woman from before. "Ah, so it is you after all, arrogant baboon."
Renji glared at the woman as she laughed, her straight hair swaying with the soft summer breeze.
"What is it to you anyway? A woman shouldn't be in the streets, they are dangerous." He opened the door to go back inside. "You should've gone home."
Arisawa Tatsuki stared at him, amused by how formal he was talking to her and seemed unable to recognize her. Right, ten years had done a huge difference since the last time in which they had seen each other. After so long, she barely recalled the tattooed shinigami that had resided in Karakura for months, right before some war had broken out threatening the lives of the residents here, but she had not seen any of them since then and after Ichigo had left as well.
She forgot almost everything about shinigamis, except the fact that a crazy shopkeeper had stalked her all throughout her first year of college and pestered her about developing her powers. In truth, Tatsuki had tried with great difficulty accepting everything, but did not refuse to train. Finishing her degree in public relations had taken a great deal of time, studying and training had been an arduous accomplishment at the time, but now she stood there face to face with a shinigami that she had not seen in so long.
"Well, can't you at least great me properly, idiot!" She muttered, utterly annoyed by his behaviour. "Maybe I should cut my hair, but I swore to Orihime to not follow her to Tokyo to keep an eye on her and this is a memento for it."
Renji stared at her, saw that off girly thing going on with the mismatched brown sweater and red skinny jeans—a girly woman would never dress like that; especially with horrible silver shoes. Her eyes held that strong flame though, it was hard to miss.
"Arisawa, did anyone tell you that your get up looks obscenely insulting?" He could not help but smirk, it was undeniable to not make fun of her.
"Dumbass," she walked towards him and punched him. "That is for not greeting me properly, but also for insulting my best clothes."
The vice-captain bent over, holding his stomach as the punch seriously had done the damage, and she was strong as ever, but maybe even more. He would have to get payback for that punch, it was strong as hell and he was sure that it wasn't even normal for a human girl to hold that much power.
"You're one hundred years too early to punch me like that," he groaned, as he put the cold icepack on his stomach.
"Really, thought that you were just one hundred years too old to look so pitiful and not get a punch," she shrugged. "So, what is the sixth division vice-captain doing here?"
"It is not your business to know," he huffed, taking a seat on a chair nearby.
She shook her head, saying nothing in response and stared at him again. His hair was red as ever, Renji kept its length, and his tattoos were not hidden by that white piece of clothing like the past; but there was something more mature about him. He looked stronger though, but with a very pitiful vacant expression that she knew that it was not normal.
"Aren't you nice?" She muttered, crossing her arms as she sat beside him. "Well, maybe I should ask how you're holding up these days."
The man stared at her with a confused expression clouding his face; she seemed a little too easy going now.
"You're going to annoy me then, but guess I can converse with you." He stated, but earned a scowl knowing that his speech had changed over the years.
Ten years created a huge gap and enough time to gather things to talk about, experiences, sadness, happiness, anger, triumph...there were so many things to express and took many days after that night. Meeting during days off, closings due to celebrations and in between change the whole view of the world as the hottest days of summer dawned upon Karakura, rain did not seem to come in the near future; much less summer winding down soon.
Tatsuki found herself in a predicament though; she enjoyed their conversations a little too much and even had to guts to confess to Renji that he should get a cell phone. During the nights in her empty apartment, with the light of the street lamps she would seat in the windowsill exchanging text messages with him for hours. He lived nearby though, in Orihime's old apartment, but she refused to let him know that they were closer—though she had a hunch that he already knew.
The whole shinigami business made it impossible for someone to keep something hidden, especially since said shinigami could find spiritual pressure easily and recognize whose it was. So, it was quite foolish to hide herself and she knew that he was given her the time necessary to spark up their friendship more than ever. She visited the local bar frequently, just to talk to him about the long day in the office and dealing with stressful people and their problems, or how she had to fire two people for being lazy and the like.
Renji only laughed at her predicaments though, always saying that humans worked much differently, but at least many could easily fit in without having to worry about powers. She understood him quite well on that, if the real world worked in such way, many would rather die than to continue living knowing that their powers weren't strong enough to belong in the demanding world, perhaps it worked the same way. It made it difficult to go around killing each other though.
"Are you going?" Tatsuki asked one fine morning, as they enjoyed their breakfast at a small dinner.
"Going where?" Renji answered with a question, sipping on his hot coffee to wake his brain a bit more after a long night.
"The wedding, I mean, heard that Rukia and Ichigo were tying the knot from that crazy shopkeeper," she commented, almost as if they were talking about the weather. Except, she notice the change of expression on his face.
"No, noble weddings aren't attended by low status," he answered, hiding his affliction. "Besides, I haven't gotten orders from my captain to go back, so I must stay."
"Oh, I see then," she shifted on her seat uncomfortably, taking a bite out of the piece of toasted bread. "I thought maybe you'll like to go, Ichigo insisted that I must attend, but I'm not going for him. Orihime will be quite shocked, so got to be there for her."
He stared at her with his brown eyes, that deflecting emotion cutting across his face and she knew it was best to push the subject away.
"Ah, I should get going though, got to fire a bimbo," she looked at her watch, knowing that she had an hour until actually making her appearance to the building. "See you later Pineapple, wipe that expression off your face now or else you'll get another punch."
Renji watched as she waved at him, rushing out of the place and disappearing into the small crowd of people already going about in the street.
It would be long before he would accept that Rukia was never meant to be his, so he was thankful that his boss had given him a day off and the shinigami simply sat atop the hill in his shinigami form, looking at the sun being swallowed up by darkness and welcoming the twilight; knowing that Kuchiki Rukia had made her much anticipated debut as the wife of Kurosaki Ichigo. Despite of his ill feelings towards the idea, there was a long apology to hand out once he returned back to Soul Society.
The only thing he would rather avoid was for her to bring back the day in which he had revealed his feelings and for her to apologize for not accepting them like he wanted; besides it would just simply hurt his pride as a man. There were many things to regret about later, for now he wanted to lie underneath the twilight and swallow up whatever fears had existed before—it was time to truly move on and forget everything.
"This must be a horrible habit of yours," Tatsuki commented as she entered his apartment, her eyes staring vividly at the mess of things.
"I'm usually out, trying with great difficulty to learn how to live in this place," Renji frowned, watching as she moved about while picking up the rubbish from the floor. "I'm not a neat cleaning freak; we have fewer things in comparison to humans."
The shinigami did not know what had brought up the idea to invite her, just for a night of watching movies since she seemed to be looking rather down; it was just strange. Except, Tatsuki had insisted to have some drinks in a quiet place; she had grown tired of going to the bar just to continue their long conversations and was best to visit his place. He had no objection whatsoever, so he prompted on getting the apartment clean, but failed to do so as he was always being bothered by Urahara for useless things.
"Oi, stop going off in space and help me here!" She snapped at him, flinging a pair of his boxers to his face. "It'll be the end of me before I leave this place, men are thoroughly useless sometimes."
He said nothing in return, simply watching her walking about the place and picking up the rubbish that had collected itself over the past two months, but seemed almost strange that he did not mind her there and doing that menial task of cleaning for the sake of making the place look like someone could really subsist there. She seemed to care profoundly; Renji admired her and had been doing so lately.
"Really, this place looks better," the dark haired woman sighed, dropping on the sofa. "And, Abarai you should really think about cleaning a bit more, else no woman would dare to step inside this place."
"Wouldn't you know? Would you prefer that women walk in here and be awed by the cleanliness of my apartment?" He dropped beside her, grabbing the remote and turning the television on. "Seems pointless when no one visits, aside from Chad or Ishida, but they are doing their own thing."
She stared at his peaceful face, it was illuminated with a certain calmness about it and he looked almost like he was making peace with something at last, but she failed to comment on it as he spoke again.
"Besides, I'm not trying to pick up women and bring them here." He turned to stare at her, his eyes revealing nothing as she shrugged.
"Whatever, no women would really want to pick a brainless idiot like you," Tatsuki crossed her arms, glaring at him.
"No men would ever dare to lay eyes on you, especially with that horrid fashion of yours," Renji snorted, jumping up from the couch just as she was about to punch him.
"How dare you!"
"I'm an honest guy, so had to tell you before someone else would."
She jumped from the couch, chasing after him in the small space available. Really, that cheeky man had the guts to insult her style just to piss her off, Tatsuki would make sure that he would bow down to her and start apologising for his rather rude actions and obscene insults towards her.
Summer slowly came to an end, the hot summer days were welcomed with cool breezy nights and some rain; Karakura seemed to appreciate it nonetheless. Also, the ending of the less favoured season made it easier to deal with the unease that squeezed tightly in his heart, so he was grateful for that.
Now though, there was something else that kept on going around in circles as he sat there in Tatsuki's apartment and watched her from afar while she cooked. Her voice barely reached his ears as Renji forgot the television and simply watched her carefully, the ridiculous apron truly stood out in its disgusting bright orange hue, but that was nothing to really admire from her back. Instead, her long hair had been put up in a messy bun and her usual shorts showed the hem of her underwear and her tank top was rather tight on her fit slender form; she looked admirable and nice.
She had a habit of tapping her foot while chopping vegetables, she moved her neck from side to side while waiting for things to boil to the right consistency; he didn't know why she was standing out in his small world in such way. Besides, the red headed shinigami wasn't sure if to trust his feelings in such fashion; especially after being rejected a few months back. Wait…what the hell was he thinking?
"Alright there, Abarai, you seem a bit down." She approached him, touching his forehead making him flinch.
"I'm fine, better watch those things in the stove or else you'll burn your house down," he tried to put off the bizarre sensation that had ripped through him with a simple banter, but she flicked his forehead.
"Dumbass, you could get sick and I'm no specialist in shinigami illness." She called out from the kitchen, while digging the fridge to find the tofu that she had purchased earlier in the day. "I know that I will become one, but you know my training is just low level stuff in comparison to your own powers."
Tatsuki had already mentioned the part about being stalked by Urahara, training the demon powers that had suddenly sprung up after that winter war all those years ago, but never fully developed them into something great like Orihime's or Chad's powers; they were just regular and quite simple. He understood to want to stay in a low level, it was scary taking notice that one had powers that were manifesting inside; so he explained about how he had come about and joined the ranks of the elite shinigami force in Soul Society.
So, maybe he understood her better, was able to share most things that involved strength and the tough kind of things—unlike with anyone else before. Girls only worried about nails, fancy clothes and pretty hair, but she was different from them and Renji connected with that; maybe that's why he was beginning to see her in a new light.
"You should get a glass," she brought him out of his reverie and saw her smirk. "And, perhaps you should start looking elsewhere before you end up with a black eye."
He frowned, turning to pay attention back to the television show, trying to hide his blush. "Whatever, I demand as a guest in this house to get food."
She laughed, throwing the apron to the back of his head. "As a host, I demand a man with manners inside my house."
The autumn season was well spent; Tatsuki invited Renji more often and seemed to be cohabitating with her. They did laundry together, had breakfast, dinner and did other activities as their close friendship allowed. She was annoyed that the feeling of being nearby him had grown, there could not go a day without talking to him or meeting with him.
"So, you like Abarai," Ishida commented, as Chad nodded silently while meeting at a local café.
She spat her drink out. "Are you stupid or what? Of course I don't!" The blush on her face was the evidence.
"It is no use denying it, Arisawa," he pushed his glasses, grabbing his school bag. "I should head back, there's a long lecture that I must hand out."
"My lessons start in an hour," Chad stood, snatching the guitar case from the chair beside him.
Tatsuki simply sat there, grabbing her cup. Before Ishida left, he walked back and looked at her.
"You should tell him how you feel before it's too late," he commented, his eyes staring at hers.
"Just go away now, dumb ass," she glared at him as he shrugged and left.
Renji continued to send his monthly reports, hoping that soon he would take his leave from the place or just have something else to do. Pushing himself away from the desk, he leaned back and stared at the ceiling to think. That human woman came into mind; she was coming into a lot of his dreams lately and beginning to take place a lot in his thoughts. Tatsuki begun to build herself an important place in his life, she was a trusty partner and friend, she had his back and he cared about her a lot. A guy did not escape a punch from his fist; she deserved respect for being a woman and hated the catcalls that other women made when they went somewhere.
The affection was growing slowly, the red headed shinigami was certain, and did not hate it so much. Rukia had long married Ichigo; it seemed that they were living a good life now from what Yachiru and Momo reported back from Soul Society during the weekly calls. Hell, a lot of things had changed there as well. Hitsugaya-taichou was trying to get Karin to make a permanent move to Soul Society; it seemed that there would be wedding bells in the near future.
There was no resentment there, Tatsuki took notice and he was sure that for once his heart felt at ease.
"Kiss me," she said, as both sat in a park after a long walk.
"What the hell are you saying?" Renji stood, trying to hide his blossoming feelings for her. "Have you gone mad or something?"
Tatsuki looked at him, those eyes looking deadly serious unlike before. They were not children and they were certainly not some foolish teenagers; at least in her case. She was a woman, mature with a job that paid for all the bills and needed to find that certain someone to share something in life with—she had debated over her feelings for weeks and could not push them away.
"No, I have not," they stood there, staring at each other for the longest time. "And I want a man like you to kiss me, whisk me away and treat me like the woman I am."
He was dumbfounded, confused a bit by her behaviour, but Renji did not have to process it as Tatsuki pulled him down to her height and kissed him.
She was impressed by her courage to do so, to boldly state feelings that had been hindering about deep inside for long, slowly they manifested in few insults and punches and now it turned to the beautiful kiss that which she had would had never imagined. Renji stopped caring for once, dropping everything and simply taking her invitation. Her moisten lips pressed hard against his, both suffocated in the immense feeling.
All that pain from before, all those memories of the once beautiful petite woman vanished, replaced by another face. Time changed so many things; he kissed her, hugged her, and embraced her as she enjoyed the feeling rushing throughout her entire body. The wires in his body reawaken, her warm hands pressed against his chest.
"It is time to move on Renji," he was surprised that Tatsuki used his name.
"Moving on is difficult," he expressed, pressing his forehead against hers. "I will try my best, just be patient with me." She could deal with that much for now.
Autumn had been a beautiful season, filled with warm moments and kind playfulness. There were no regrets or ill feelings to continue dragging on; instead they were happier and more colourful than ever. Being stuck in a world of white and black had been tormenting, neither could manage to move away from it without being around each other for support. The empty space had been filled, warm hands held tightly as winter began and snow fell upon the streets of Karakura.
It seemed like years had passed, when in truth only a few months had simply slipped away. The time together felt eternal, each passing day brought new shades into their lives, more colours to look at and more feelings that harvested deep inside. They shared more than just a few kisses then, the progressing of their relationship seemed forward and bold.
"So, you are taking care of her," Rukia had returned, looking for Renji to make things clear and settle the turbulent months that had slipped away.
"Yeah, that's how it is," Renji said, looking at her cerulean eyes and could not muster those ancient feelings. "She's one of a kind, Tatsuki keeps me balanced and I have a need to keep a watch over her because I care."
The petite woman smiled, pushing the cup away from her as they sat in the coffee shop.
"Then, you will understand how I feel towards Ichigo," she sighed, leaning her chin against her hand.
"Maybe, it's a new feeling that I must process properly in my head," the red headed shinigami stood up. "I'm glad that things turned out differently, so better keep watch over that idiot for me."
She grinned. "That's why I married him, and hopefully you return soon."
He walked away, waving at her and disappearing into the mass of people during the winter morning.
It was better that way, forgetting everything entirely for his sake and to keep close the only person that he really yearned for. Tatsuki was more than just a simple girl, she meant more than Rukia had ever meant in his life despite the little time that they had known each other. It was impossible to look at another girl, even the women that tried to pick him up in the bar failed miserably. Renji only needed her and no one else.
"Renji…" their whispers vanished into the snowy night, their bodies merged into the climatic beginning rather than an end.
He kissed her deeply, embracing her with all the feelings that he could muster, but perhaps they would grow deeper in time. They blended in colours, their hearts beating simultaneously and their breathings warmed the darkened room. It was like a small flower grew in the cold, fighting against the weather and peaking in order to grow fuller than any other before. The precipice where they stood was high, everything clearer from their stand point.
Their love blossomed through the months, slipping into a norm that both accepted without complaints. She woke up next to him, it had been shortly two weeks after when he moved in, and stretched as a brand new day began. Renji changed so much, he was sure as his calls from Soul Society lessen and it seemed that the job would last much longer—he just was uncertain as to how long it would go like that. There was no permanency from his side, Tatsuki surely had that, but in his case it was impossible to tell whether he would be there during the next day or not.
Winter stood white, the days slipping away faster as the end of the year came towards both of them. She was certain that her job would not be the same next year, it was getting tiring putting up with people and their problems. Renji had been promoted to manager, managing the bar all by himself and hiring a new assistant. Still, their arguments began just like any other normal couple and he had spent a few nights in the couch.
"Are you feeling well?" He asked one morning, seeing her chalky complexion.
"I'm totally fine, maybe that Thai food from yesterday did not set well in my stomach," she smirked, grabbing the glass of juice and gulping it. "I should get going; else that boss of mine will leave me deaf before the end of the day."
"Take care, call if you don't feel well during the day," he kissed her gently, staring at her eyes. "And don't be stubborn woman and ignore that feeling, don't feel like dragging you to the hospital."
"Moron, I'll kick your ass for saying that," she grinned and grabbed her things.
He had not known that it would be the last time that he would be seeing her, embrace her because things were not permanent like winter. His eyes stared at the orange haired man, his crestfallen face indicated simply the news that it was time to leave and say nothing.
"My apologies, but you are needed back," Ichigo expressed, his casual frown present, but his voice did not match that usual tone of his. "It is best to not get involved more than you should have, but I can't judge on that."
"Damn right, you are not the one to brag right?" There was still resentment towards him; it seemed that he was the type to always rip away a tiny part of his life that was necessary. "I refuse what would you do then?"
Ichigo did not like to meddle into someone else's business, but this time, there was no helping it.
"Nothing, unless you want that child to grow without a father," his amber eyes burned holes in his heart, suffocating his thoughts entirely.
"W-what the hell are you saying?" The red headed shinigami stared, flabbergasted.
The orange haired shinigami sighed. "I was not supposed to say that, but saving you the heartache will be better. Tatsuki is pregnant, meaning that you either go back to Soul Society or end up with nothing to last the rest of your long life."
"Do I have to leave now?" He asked, tearing his gaze from his and looking at the window.
"Not repeating myself here," Ichigo turned; the vice-captain badge glared the fifth number. "Don't try to run away, because you are my friend and I would hate to pick a fight with you."
Renji said nothing, simply following him and disappearing entirely from Karakura. Tatsuki never heard from him, there was nothing to hope for at all as that love suddenly withered away, melted like the snowflakes. They were supposed to spend time together, the winter allowed them some magic, but perhaps none of it meant anything at all.
Months passed, she did not linger upon the past and learned to move on, despite the child growing inside of her. Everyone wondered who the father was, though none had a single clue. She moved to Tokyo as part of the healing process, without plans to return to Karakura ever again and moved in with one old friend from the dojo. She was exceptionally ecstatic on her own right, Tatsuki glowed like the mature woman that which she had hoped to be.
"What happened?" Orihime asked, as they finally met up in the large city.
"Nothing, that asshole just left without saying anything," she answered, rubbing her stomach. "And, I hope that he never shows up around because I will not forgive him."
The caramel haired woman sighed, her brown eyes staring at her best friend. It was inevitable to avoid it of course; she had to learn to move on once Ichigo, the love of her life, had married and stayed in Soul Society to lead his rightful life there. As for Tatsuki, there was no reason to stay bitter, but Renji had abandoned her in the most difficult time in life.
"I'm sure that there's a reason," she smiled, trying to lift her spirits.
"No Orihime, I will not hear them or try to understand them," the woman spat, squeezing the cup in her hand tightly. "If that idiot shows up, he will hear it from me and I will put him in his place."
Except, deep inside it was not the case, the more time passed by—the more worry she grew. No one mentioned Renji at all, no one asked after and things just simply stood idle in a frame. A year passed so quickly, Hiroki giggled as she played with him in his high chair. Tokyo had been a huge failure, nothing compared to Karakura at all. It was quieter, a more pleasant place for her son to grow and to experience the long life that was ahead of him.
Autumn began quickly, the rustling leaves brushed against the empty paths of the park as she pushed the stroller towards the fountain. Taking a seat on the bench, Tatsuki picked up the sleeping Hiroki and carried him for a while before going back to the empty apartment. Every season brought those memories, she oftentimes attended the bar where she had first seen him and the apartment kept all the beautiful memories that they had shared—it was impossible to forget him or erase him from her life. Looking at the cherub face of Hiroki, that similar scowl that Renji had was passed to their son, even the form of his lips. His maroon hair was straight, thin as he was yet a baby and his eyes were a soft brown hue—he was the small representation of the love that they had once shared.
It was quite useless mopping around, he would return one day.
"Tatsuki…" Renji called her name, bringing her out of her revere.
The woman looked at the tall man standing there, staring at her with a bright expression. His smirk had not changed, his hair was down for the first time in ages and his shinigami robes swayed with the gentle autumn breeze. She was in a daze; the fading sunlight was much too bright that it looked as though it was a simple part of her imagination. Tatsuki stood up, carrying her child carefully as Renji approached her slowly, all those words that she wanted to shout at him and those punches that were waiting for him—all but vanished somewhere as they stood facing each other closely.
He saw as her eyes glared at him, as usual, her lips twitched and he waited for swear words to come at him, insults and everything after so long; yet she said nothing. It seemed ages ago that they had seen each other, despite only being a year and some months, but there had been a change. Renji wanted to hug her tightly, whisper his love for her in the most cordial way, but could not speak and could only afford to smile. The bundle in her arms stirred, a tiny hand poked through the blanket and the instinct to reach out for it overcame him. That warmth was familiar; the child moved and opened his eyes to stare at him. The red headed shinigami smiled widely.
"Hiroki," he expressed, looking at her. "I have known before I left."
A tinge of sadness overcame her, tears threatened to spill at any moment, but she held them back. Her free hand reached back, her fist formed tightly and she punched him in the jaw.
"You are a complete fool," she cried, it was impossible to hold back all those foreign emotions. "You should've left a note…something that indicated that you would come back."
It was the first time that he had seen her cry, look so worn out and it was an expression that hurt him deep.
"I can't apologize for that," he rubbed his sore jaw. "And if you accept me back, the rest of our lives I will make it up for it and apologize if I have to."
Her eyes glared at him again, she had set the baby on the stroller and charged after him. Kicking and screaming obscenities that had no end, she beat him until there was nothing left to do but continue crying like a weakly child. Renji allowed her to do as she wished, if it helped erase her hatred or pain; whichever was he did not mind it.
"I've missed you…stupid pineapple head," she hiccupped, trying with great difficulty to hate him for one moment, but failed.
"I have as well," he caressed her face, removing the tears that were still falling.
It had not been simple to return, fall back on that place where he had fit so well before; it was difficult to adjust and manage to reconcile with Tatsuki. Not that it was a difficult task to do so, but she had forgiven him after everything became clear as to why he had left in the first place. She was calm now, cool and collected while listening to his explanation. There had been nothing to forgive, only to continue on with whatever had begun before. Everything returned to normal, he was allowed to visit more often than anyone else.
A time existed for them, their eyes saw each passing season, the first steps of their son and their love grew with each day. Until, her final day came in a very tragic way, but despite that Tatsuki and Renji continued their life in Soul Society.
"So peaceful," she expressed, shortly after coming to Soul Society. "I can understand why many like this place, especially when there's not much to worry about."
"Wait until you adjust better to this place, and you'll want to leave," he smirked, leaning against the door frame of his living quarters. "I regret nothing, meeting you has been about the best thing in my entire existence."
Tatsuki turned to look at him with bewildered eyes. "An idiot like you can actually say nice things, I'm beyond shocked here."
Renji glared at her. "Stupid woman, you make me say embarrassing things."
"Well, whatever the case, you will not leave me again Abarai Renji." She turned to look at the fine morning, enjoying the smell of the flowers.
"I have promised, have I not?" He took his seat beside her, the blue sky reflecting the beautiful day to come after a rainy night. "Whether its winter or summer, I'll be here and you'll grow so tired of me that…"
"That I will take the first step to chase after you and kill you," she joked, reaching to touch his hand. "So you better treat me right, so that I don't have a reason to kill you or leave you for another man."
"Like hell you will," they stared at the blue sky and began their day with the usual routine.