Apple Gel

Disclaimer: We all wished we had something to own. Okay. So we have our computers…… and our houses…… heck we own stuff.

A/N: This is my first attempt at a oneshot. Yes I tend to think too much which lead to very weird things. How do you think I come up with stories?

Spoilers? Of course.

Pairings: Luke x Tear, and a little puny bit, if even- Guy x Natalia.

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It was but one of the many days that would lead the group of soldiers and nobles to the same fate. To save the world.

Aside from the crisis that rested on the shoulders of mere humans, which threatened to crush them under the pressure, our heroes have decided amongst themselves to take breaks from time to time. Today happened to be one of those peaceful days that were waiting to be spent wisely. This time, they had picked their favourite spot. By 'they,' it mostly meant Luke. That redheaded boy had grown quite attached to the beautiful valley, and his teammates would often carry on small conversations, debating about what had pushed Luke to like Tataroo Valley so much. Natalia, the romantic-story-believing-princess she was, would argue that this was the place where Luke first met Tear. Or rather ended up being thrown here, alone with her at night. Guy would shrug and say that, that could be a possibility out of many others. Then with his matter-of-factly voice, he'd bring up how calming it was here. A perfect place to reflect about the past events. On the other hand , Anise would also bring an interesting idea to their attention. Selenia's were Tear's favourite, they all knew that well including that redheaded replica. So far, both of them had grown quite close to each other, and perhaps it was Luke's way to please, and thank someone very dear to him. By choosing a place that Tear would enjoy spending her time with everyone, she would then be greatful towards Luke, and God-knew-what else would happen afterwards. Jade merely mused at the idea that Luke could actually be some sort of mysterious gentleman that would take Tear on romantic dates in their presence.

"Guy! You ask him!" Anise pushed the swordsman forth, but had tripped over her own foot and tumbled face-first into the lush grass due to Guy's skillful dodge.

He apologized profusely, but never offered to help her up. "W-why me?!" Guy became quite good at changing the subject when someone was about to yell at him. It was probably all because of Jade's fault. His teasing was contagiously dangerous.

"Agh- fine! Don't try and ask me for anything because I won't help you!" The puppeteer went to a nearby rock and pouted her usual childish pout, completely forgetting what she was supposed to force Guy into doing. But to Guy's dismay, Natalia took on the relay and crossed her arms firmly across her chest. The way she ordered her ex-servant made her seem as demanding as ever, but Guy didn't mind much. It was just the fact that he always had to be the one to talk, either by explaining the whole situation- a task gladly given by Jade- or sweet talk and charm girls that would often throw themselves like homing banshee's at him. "C'mon Guy. Just ask him indirectly his true motives behind picking Tataroo Valley most of the time. Do it while Tear's away to fetch us water."

Despite the fact that they were very near the ocean, and a clear stream of water, Natalia and Anise both succeeded in making Tear go and get clean water from some very far river at the other side of the valley. They both figured that she'd manage with all the monsters roaming around due to the fact that Anise promised her to let her use Tokunaga once. Never would that mysterious girl ever pass on an offer of the sort.

"Fine! I'll go! You happy?" After what seemed like endless minutes of wrath, Guy finally succumbed to the very dangerous threats-of-touch and slowly made his way- wearily may I add- to Luke, who was gazing distantly at the ocean below.

The crashing waves that licked the edge of the cliff's rocky side clashed well with the melody of the blowing winds. The trees, and flowers swayed to its song, accompanied by the warmth of this beautiful day.

Luke hadn't noticed Guy's arrival at first, but soon snapped out of his reveries as the blonde swordsman settled next to him. Both of them enjoyed the soft grass beneath them that had also taken the initiative of dancing blissfully.

"What's up?" Luke asked casually, not taking his eyes off the waves, but acknowledged his presence with a curt nod.

"Ah same old stuff. You know, tomorrow's a big day and all. It's only been a week since we got back together after Van's death."

"Yeah, the Absorption Gate was a killer."

There was a short moment of silence. Most of their conversations always started on the serious stuff, but Guy was determined to break the ice, and get the question over with. This way, it would give them a lovely topic to talk about, and then, he could report back to Natalia. As the older swordsman readied himself to speak, Luke interrupted abruptly. "Hey Guy?"

"Yeah?" He failed, thehe right moment to ask him about Tataroo Valley now, would be after he replied to Luke's question.

"How did it feel like?"

"Huh?"

"How did it feel like, touching Tear's breast back at the spa?"

This question caught the young blonde off guard. Why the hell would he want to know that? Luke had, after all, caused him to do that. If he wanted to know then why didn't he kick himself into the woman's spa- which was logically impossible but right now Guy's mind was spinning insanely.

"Wh-what?!"

What surprised Guy the most was that Luke didn't seem the least abashed by his question. Not the slightest blush, nor the slightest stutter.

"I don't know. They look like melons, but also remind me of Apple Gels-"

"Wait, stop, hold it!!!" He never thought he could use three synonyms in one sentence, let alone, those words only. Luke turned to look at him and raised a questioning eyebrow, but Guy only sighed. "Why are you asking me this?"

"I don't know. Isn't this part of sex ed?" Luke replied, a bit irritated.

That's right. Sexual education was taught to this boy at his early age of five and six, a.k.a., his original knew of it and the replica didn't. They made him learn it so early because they feared for his behaviours, and well- Dist probably forgot to add that memory to Luke's brain. Guy would have to go strangle that airheaded genius the next time they met. Then maybe he'd add some new memories to Luke's poor, virgin memories. That would probably end up being called mind-rape, but Asche had already done that to Luke more than enough times... In a different way of course. That naive replica still didn't understand what sexual intercourse and all that jazz meant after his talks with Asche about saving the world, not that he was supposed to learn from his original.

"Well- Uhh……" The thought of asking his friend about Tataroo Valley were totally obliviorated, and the search for an answer to his questions took over. Natalia, Anise, and Jade stood idly by observing him, probably debating on Luke's response while Tear had still not arrived of her hour-long trip to the far river. "I uhh-"

"Hey, it's not my fault I notice things like this! How the hell are original babies made?!"

A parent's nightmare question. Guy dreaded that. He wasn't ready to be a father, let alone, his best friend's father.

"What about girls? What makes them different from guys? I mean- a part from their chests-"

"Hold it Luke! I'll only answer one question at a time, and jeez. Couldn't you ask Jade to explain this to you?" Ah, but Guy already knew what the outcome of that would be. In the end, everyone would all pass it down to him, and he'd be left with the dirty work.

"But Jade-"

"Alright, alright! Fine!" Snapped the boy impatiently, but then there was another silence. The swordsman started fidgeting with the grass around him. He pulled a few blades of grass out, released them, and then started to pull again on a fresh batch. Heck, he was basically mowing the fields with his fingers. "So uh…… -at the spa. When you kicked me……" There seemed to be a hint of accusation in his tone. "Well- oh!" Yes, perfect simile. "You know how apple gels feel like when you hold them, right?"

"Yeah." Came Luke's instant reply.

"Well Tear's breasts feel a bit like those. Except they aren't cold they're-"

"Mieu told me that you guys were talking passionately about women." A familiar voice boomed over them. It was feminine, and melodic like the songs that have been sung so many times, though this time it had a deadly pitch to it. "I was heading over to give some tips to Guy, like Natalia requested from afar, although it seems that you do not need any."

Now both boys turned slowly to meet a very stiff, and angry Tear. Okay, so no one really knew when Tear was angry, but the fact that everything went silent, including the breeze had told them enough. It felt as if all the air from their lungs had been absorbed by her eyes- where Luke noticed that she was slightly twitching, just barely- and that their souls were being sucked dry. Even the atmosphere became tense as the sky turned an odd shade of red.

"T-Tear!!!" Exclaimed Guy, in a rather pitchy voice. "I-I-I was- I was just using you as an example for my sexual education lessons!"

Not smooth.

By now, it looked like Natalia, Jade, and Anise finally understood what they were talking about. The princess intentionally planned to make Tear walk into their conversation where she would hear about Luke's intentions of their picnic, but Guy happened to have not asked the question planned. Natalia slapped her forehead, clearly getting the message that Guy messed up, and she made it worse by sending their little clad Lorelei soldier onto the battlefield. Jade pleasantly remained silent beside Anise, and listened intently now that the conversation could easily be heard, due to Tear's booming voice, and Guy's squeaks.

"About my chest?! How is sexual education related to my chest?!"

Mieu happily- …… mieud- while clinging onto Tear's uniform.

"Well I- it was-" The blonde swordsman didn't want to put the blame on Luke. This might cause some awkwardness between them, and then they would be separated even further which would result in his death by Natalia's hands. "Well you know. Uhm…… a woman's anatomy." He was on the right path. How did Jade talk his way out at times like this? "How it uh…… feels like?" Wrong.

Tear's eyes narrowed as she stared at him through slits. She had enough of people that commented on her chest. "I'll be down by the river again, to cool myself down." And with a quick turn, the light-brown haired girl disappeared through the tall grass and selenia's once again. Guy's head hung low as he hauled himself up, before dismissing himself back to where he was previously plotting with Natalia and the others. He had promised Luke a full, detailed explanation all about women later and alone. At first, the redheaded boy seemed quite persistent to know about it now, but soon realized how embarrassed Guy was, so he let him go. After all, Tear's wrath tended to be quite overwhelming, and for once, he was glad that he wasn't the one being scowled at.

Luke's trail of thoughts then went on and on about Apple Gels as the sky fell into a dark blue. Starts twinkled high above, and a half-eaten moon- like Mieu described it- surfaced from the horizon, casting little light upon the lands. A camp fire then crackled and danced in a mesmerizing fashion along its limited space, where a tasty aroma of soup brewed over the clearing. The others were too busy tending to their chores (or avoiding any kind of social contact) while Luke sat there, still wondering about some things.

Apple Gels reminded Luke of Tear. They sure felt like them, but they weren't cold- quoted by Guy. He'd have to ask Guy in their next conversation if girls actually used those to make their chests like that. Perhaps then for Anise's birthday, he could easily find her a present. Tear wouldn't be happy, since it was probably some girl thing, but Anise might be grateful if he bought her expensive gel like Miracle Gel. Then again, Luke remembered seeing Tear in her swimsuit. The one she rented of course, seeing that she refused to wear the one that Peony lord gave her. It seemed that there was something that firmly supported her chest and they didn't exactly seem like they were the colour of an Apple Gel nor an Orange Gel. So a blue Miracle Gel might not suit Anise much.

"Man, this stuff is complicated. No wonder guys don't bother." The boy thought to himself. He'd have to ask how it worked too.

After all, Tataroo Valley was the place where Luke first found, and saw how an apple gels looked like, and little did everyone else know that their intepretation on Luke's taste were all very wrong.

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A/N: PM me if you're too slow to catch the message of the ending, even if it's weird.

How the hell did I come up with something so stupid? Did Luke choose Tataroo Valley because he found his first Apple Gel there? Perhaps.

Did Luke ever get sexual education? Maybe yes, maybe no. Ha.

Yes I know. He seemed quite knowledgeable when it came to comparing Tear's chest with melons, but I just had to make him innocent. And he probably isn't so innocent…… but bear with me and go with the flow.

Poor Tear. We'll never leave her alone about her chest.

As a bonus, I'll include Daft Punk music videos that go in order to make an anime. Cute, and the techno music is nice too.

One More Time-, Aerodynamic-, Digital Love-, Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger-, Crescendolls-, Nightvision-, Superheroes-, High Life-, Something About Us-, Voyager-, Veridis Quo-, Short Circuit-, Face to Face-, Too Long.