Chapter One

'Alexander William Gaskarth, you better not me kidding me on right now.' I warned, pointing my finger at him as I sat at the breakfast bar. He smiled innocently at me and held his hands up, palms facing me.

'Honest, I'm not!' he said, innocence lacing in his voice. I let the feeling sink in, oh my god. I'm going to the Warped Tour! Excitement built in my stomach and I launched myself at my brother.

'You're the best brother ever!' I yelled, hugging him fiercely. He chuckled, hugging me back and grinning widely. 'I can't believe I'm going!' I was totally shocked; this was the first time I would actually get to tour with the band! I hadn't thought Alex would have wanted me cramping his style, me being his younger sister and all, but apparently I was wrong. Because I'm going to the fucking Warped Tour!

This was my first year going. Last year I had been tied up with school exams and senior year, and couldn't go, but this year I was taking a gap year between high school and college, and was ready to do some crazy shit. Mum and Dad had gone back to England for the summer, so I was free to do whatever I wanted.

'What do the rest of the guys think?' I asked I was kinda nervous. I didn't want to go uninvited.

'They're as excited as you.' Alex answered, returning to his massive bowl of cereal. 'They're coming round for practice in about an hour.' He said his mouth full of coco snaps. I skipped happily up to my room.

I got into my room, stepping over the mountains of clothes littered everywhere and made my way to my massive wardrobe. Seriously, I didn't even know why I had a wardrobe; all my clothes didn't even fit in it.

I chose my Mayday Parade tee and black shorts for the day, with my black florally tights. It was only the band coming round after all. I left my hair naturally curly, and didn't put my make up on for a change, before bouncing downstairs to watch Cribs. Some of the houses on this show were unreal.

The front door slammed open and I heard a cry of 'RUBY-BEAR' before the breath was knocked out of me as Jack landed on top of me.

'Get your fat butt off of me, Barakat!' I yelled trying to push Jack off as he began to tickle me and I started to giggle helplessly. It was useless, he would win this. He repeatedly tickled me until I was red in the face, and rolling around like a mad woman in fits of laughter.

'Say, Jack Barakat is the sexiest mother-fucker alive.' He insisted, still tickling me.

'Jack Barakat is the sexiest mother-fucker alive.' I wheezed, trying to get my breath back, a wide smile on my face. Of course, he wouldn't know that I believed that. He relieved me from his insistent tickling immediately, flashing me his signature smile.

I shot him a death glare as he stood up and brushed himself off, and held out his hand for me. We had ended up on the floor without me even noticing. I took it, feeling electric currents tingle at my fingertips. I was pretty sure I was the only one who felt that.

I noted that he was wearing a purple JAGK shirt with 'boner' printed on the front and a pair of black skinnies. His wrecked converse had been left in the hallway, leaving him in his superman socks. His hair was styled in its usual messy disarray. God, he looked hot.

As soon as he had helped me up, Jack began running around in circles shouting 'Ruby's coming to Warped, Ruby's coming to Warped.' After his tenth lap, Rian had to stop him.

They got set up in the basement, after I had received hugs from Zack and Rian, and I got snuggled down on the old worn out sofa down there, ready to be their critic.

'Any requests?' Alex asked quizzically, already knowing the answer.

'Oooh! I said clapping my hands in excitement. 'The Party Scene!' It was my favourite song they had released, the grittier realistic stuff.

Hey kid, you've got a lot of potential

But I think it's time to move up

So go on and blow us away with your sound, now

You're everything that we've come to love

You taught us to move, now show it off

Just drop us a beat…

Typically, I zoned out after the first verse. I watched the look of utter concentration on Jack's face as his fingers flew up and down his guitar expertly, he was so cute. And his eyes, I don't think I had ever seen such brown eyes. They were the colour of chocolate, warm and loving, with flecks of amber. I came back to Earth just as they were finishing the song; I had to stop day-dreaming.

When they were done, I clapped loudly, cheering. Jack done an over exaggerated bow, and we all laughed. I stayed for the rest of the practice, giving a few tips, but mostly just staying in my own little world.

I headed up when they began packing things away and going over set-lists. I figured I'd make dinner, it was only four, but I was sure the boys wouldn't mind. They had never-ending appetites.

I decided to keep it simple, I didn't really have much of an appetite today, I didn't know what was up with me. Chicken pasta bake for main, and Ben and Jerry's for dessert, dinner made.

'DINNER!' I yelled in the general direction of the boys, I didn't know if they were still in the basement, or if they had moved up into the living room. The sound of thundering footsteps echoed through the kitchen, and they ran through the door, practically drooling when they saw the food. They all crammed around the kitchen table, wolfing down everything in sight. I was in shock at how quickly they could move when food was mentioned, it was almost inhuman.

I stuck to the counter as they hoovered the food from their plates, going back for seconds and thirds. I had hardly even touched my meal, and they had cracked open the Ben & Jerry's.

'That was great, Ruby-Dooby.' Jack said patting his stomach. I smiled at him as I gathered in all the plates, and put them in the dishwasher.

'Aw, thanks Jackie.' I replied, before heading up for a shower. I needed to think properly, and a shower was the best place for that.

I let the warm spray soothe me as I thought everything over. I was at loss with the situation I was in. I couldn't tell the one of the people who I was closest to, who I told everything, who I had a crush on. Because, it was his best friend. And then there was the problem that Jack was oblivious to the fact that I liked him, and most definitely didn't like me back. I mean why would he? Sure, we were friends and we had a good time together, but why would he think anything more would become of it? It was impossible. I switched the water off after I had methodically washed my hair, and stepped out into the freezing cold hallway, hurrying across the landing.

I almost took a heart-attack when I ran into Jack.

'Oh, hey there.' I said awkwardly, rearranging my towel and looking at my feet.

'Hey there Ruby-Bear! Coming down for the movie night?' he asked, as cheerful as ever, and clearly not affected by my hardly-clothed body.

'Yeah, I'll be down in a bit.' I replied, smiling half-heartedly at him before going into my room, and shutting the door tight behind me. See? I told myself, he doesn't like you. I changed into my jim jams; an oversized you me at six tee and a pair of jersey shorts. It was kind of cold in the house, so I shoved my Jack Wills zipper on, before padding downstairs into the living room.

'Honestly? Do we need to watch this?' I groaned, as I saw the title screen for Paranormal Activity flash up onto the TV screen.

'Yup.' Alex replied, spread out on the three seater, leaving Jack and I on the love-seat. Zack and Rian must have headed home already. Alex knew I hated horrors. I jumped onto the two seater where Jack was sitting, letting him put his feet over the top of me.

'Fuck you, Alex.' I muttered as the film started. I mostly just played with the edging of Jack's jeans rather than watch the movie. I caught Jack looking at me a few times, amused with my constant fiddling of his jeans, but he never said anything, and that I was happy about. Halfway through the movie, when the main character was dragged out of her bed, I decided I'd had enough. It was way too freaky for me, without even watching it fully.

'Yeah, I'm calling it a night, guys. This shit's way too freaky for me.' I said, moving Jack's legs and sliding off of the sofa. I heard them protesting, but I just leaned down and gave Alex a kiss on the cheek, and hugged Jack. 'Night,' I called, before heading to my room.

I opened my balcony door, breathing in the cool fresh air. I had had to fight tooth and nail for this room, Alex had his heart set on it when we first moved in, but when he pushed me down the stairs onto the special china, and left me with a long scar down my left thigh, he was forced to give it to me. Yeah, I played it up just a little bit. What can I say? I was only eight.

I grabbed my guitar from the floor of my room and sat outside with it. I had made my balcony a sort of den, with blankets and cushions covering the floor, and tea-lights littered on the ledge of the wall. I sat on one of the cushions, tracing the signatures on the guitar that Alex had gotten me while he was touring with the band. Chirstofer Drew, Mikey Way, Jared Leto, Hayley Williams, Mark Hoppus and others. They all marked a different part of my life, linking the memories and keeping them from fading.

I began to strum the familiar tune of My Chemical Romance, Cancer, letting myself get lost in the music.

Turn away
If you could get me a drink
Of water cause my lips are chapped and faded

Call my Aunt Marie
Help her gather all my things
And bury me
In all my favorite colors,
My sisters and my brothers, still,

I will not kiss you,

Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you.
[ Lyrics from: .com/lyrics/m/my_chemical_ ]
Now turn away,
Cause I'm awful just to see
Cause all my hair's abandoned all my body,

All my agony,
Know that I will never marry,
Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo,
But counting down the days to go.

It just ain't living

And I just hope you know,

That if you say,
Good-bye today,
I'd ask you to be true
Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you...

Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you...

My voice broke in the middle as tears flowed steadily down my cheeks. When I had finished the melody, my shirt was salty and stained. God, I cried too much. I wiped my eyes, telling myself to get a grip before digging out my song-book hidden under the blankets. It was still light enough for me to see, I would only have to light a few candles…

I played random notes on my guitar, getting the feel of it again. It had been a while since I had written a song. My book lay open, a fresh page ready to be scribbled on with guitar notes and words, explaining the riffs and sudden change of beat.

I reluctantly returned inside only when the glow from the candles wasn't enough for me to see, and the midges began to bite. I was proud of myself though, I had managed to write a half decent song while I had been out. I played it over when I got back inside, and it sounded good. A start at least.

I lay in bed for a while, listening to my iPod and texting Lola; my best friend, before my mind insisted on rest. As I burrowed down under the covers, and my eyes were drooping, I heard the faint creak of the spare room door opening. Well, Jack's room door. He had stayed in that room whenever he was sleeping over for 6 years, after him and Alex had got out of the habit of sleeping in the living room. I smiled slightly, he must be staying tonight. I fell asleep, feeling a little bit safer.

I groaned as I was woken by the sound of my phone ringing. I denied the call, not even checking to see who it was before turning over onto my side and trying to sleep again. Ugh, it was impossible. No matter who much I tried, I just couldn't get back to sleep. I checked the time; almost blinding myself with the brightness of my phone and saw it was 4.30 am, way too early to be up.

Knowing sleep was out of the question; I dragged my duvet of the bed and headed downstairs to the lounge, switching on Shrek and snuggling down to watch it on the sofa. About fifteen minutes in, I heard someone softly coming down the stairs and into the living room. It was Jack. He looked adorable, his hair all flat and only in his sweatpants.

'Hey,' he said tiredly, rubbing his eyes. 'Why you up so early?' he asked, plopping down beside me and stealing some of my covers.

'Some stupid prick phoned me, and I couldn't get back to sleep.' I replied, shifting my legs onto him and giving him some of my duvet. 'Why are you up?' I asked, curious. I thought I had been quiet in the process of going downstairs.

'Couldn't sleep and I heard the television. Thought I would check it out.' He said, smiling a little. I chuckled.

'Yeah, cause you could have knocked the burglars clean out.' I joked, laughing. He feigned hurt, rubbing his heart.

'You cut me real deep. And for your information, I could totally knock someone out. With my pinky finger.' He replied, face totally serious.

'Oh yeah, definitely. With those muscles, the burglars don't stand a chance.' I said, nodding, my face grave.

'Hey! Don't diss my babies, I might have to throw you in the pool if you say anything else mean about them, I can't let them take that kind of abuse.' He said, kissing both his arms. I just laughed, shaking my head.

It was cute that he knew all the words to Shrek, almost matching my skill, and I had watched this movie a million times. We quoted words to each other the whole way through it, laughing at the smallest things and just talking. It was good; I hadn't properly spoke to Jack in weeks. But, I still wanted more. As the film neared an end, we settled into a comfortable silence, and I swear, I shut my eyes for a second, and it was morning.

We were still in the same positions as last night, me curled up and Jack with his legs stretched out in-front of him. The TV was replaying the Shrek title screen over and over again. The duvet had ended up on the floor, in a heap. Jack was sound asleep, breathing lightly with one of his hands on my leg. I gently eased myself off the sofa, careful not to wake him, and put the cover over him. As if he sensed I wasn't there anymore, he lay down on the sofa, muttering slightly in his sleep. He was so cute it made me want to scream.

I stumbled into the kitchen, turning the kettle on and sitting at the breakfast bar. What an amazing start to the day. Sure, I was sleep-deprived, but waking up on the sofa with Jack definitely made up for that!

Suddenly, I was depressed. I needed to do something about it; I couldn't just go about acting as if everything was normal. I wanted to do something; I wanted him to like me back.

The kettle clicking loudly brought me out of my anguish. I poured my energy in a cup, and went to sit outside. I had no idea what time it was, but I didn't care. It was light outside, so it was probably around nine. I sat cross legged on the patio, looking up at the sky. The clouds made million of shapes, just like the stars did, that night Jack and I were out here.

I sipped my coffee, shivering slightly in the morning breeze. I had left my hoodie in my room. On a whim, I decided to go up and get it. I needed to check my phone anyway, and see who was phoning me at four in the morning. I plodded upstairs, and saw that my room door was half open. I was certain I had shut it after I went down the stairs. I walked in warily and blew a fuse when I saw Alex sitting on my bed, sifting through my phone.

'WHAT THE FUCK ALEX?' I screamed, running at him and trying to snatch my phone. I failed miserably as he quickly stood up, holding it above his head. Our height differences weighed on Alex's side.

'WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?' He yelled thrusting my phone in my face, last nights text conversation with Lola had been pulled up. Dread filled in my stomach, but I ignored it, dealing with my bigger feeling; anger.

'YOU WENT THROUGH MY TEXTS?' I screamed, punching his arm, 'YOU BASTARD. GIVE ME MY PHONE BACK RIGHT NOW ALEX, OR YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD.' I bellowed.

'YOU LIKE JACK, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?' He screamed back, 'MY FUCKING BEST FRIEND?' I ignored the question.

'WHY DID YOU GO THROUGH MY TEXTS ALEX, WHY? THAT'S MY OWN FUCKING PRIVACY; I RESPECT YOURS SO YOU RESPECT MINE.' I shouted, I was near tears now. Betrayal settling in my stomach.

'YOU'RE AVOIDING THE QUESTION!' He yelled at me. I gritted my teeth, I may as well just tell him.

'Yes, okay? Now give me my phone back and get the fuck out of my room. You're un-fucking-believable, do you know that? I thought I could fucking trust you, and this is what you do? Just get out, Alex. GET THE FUCK OUT!' I screamed, my voice breaking and tears streaming steadily down my face.

His face was furious, and his jaw set as he threw my phone on my desk and walked out the room, slamming the door behind him.

I descended into fits of tears. My own brother had fucking betrayed me. I had thought that he would realise how much trust meant to me after Ross cheated, but obviously not. And he had found out about Jack, and I hadn't even told him myself. I felt like the worst sister in the world. I crawled onto my bed and cried my heart out.

Okay, the starting to this story is very similar to a story I've read, but I swear the story-lines different. I'm not trying to copy the author. I've had a total writers block with Someone Like You, and I'm only two chapters in! I might continue it, I don't know. But right now, I'm focussing on this story. Please review if you like it, it would be much appreciated.

Copyright to All Time Low, and My Chemical Romance for the amazing songs in the passage.