My first fanfiction! I'm working really hard to keep it as close to canon-style as possible! It would make my day if you could spare a minute to write a review!
Remember, at this point in New Moon, Bella hasn't yet discovered Jacob's a werewolf, and she certainly doesn't know about all the differences about newborn vampires. This story is going to focus a lot on Bella surviving as a vampire without the Cullens. So don't expect Alice to pop up in Chapter 2, and they all live happily ever after! Werewolves conveniently erase visions. The only spoiler I can give is the main character selections. Trust me, I'll work hard to make the reunion epic. ;D

Disclaimer: The Twilight universe belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Not me.

***

"Please," I gasped.

Laurent shook his head, his face kind. "Look at it this way, Bella. You're very lucky I was the one to find you."

"Am I?" I mouthed, faltering another step back.

Laurent followed, lithe and graceful.

"Yes," he assured me. "I'll be very quick. You won't feel a thing, I promise. Oh, I'll lie to Victoria about that later, naturally, just to placate her. But if you knew what she had planned for you, Bella…" He shook his head with a slow movement, almost as if in disgust. "I swear you'd be thanking me for this."

I stared at him in horror.

He sniffed at the breeze that blew threads of my hair in his direction. "Mouthwatering," he repeated, inhaling deeply.

I tensed for the spring, my eyes squinting as I cringed away, and the sound of Edward's furious roar echoed distantly in the back of my head. His name burst through all the walls I'd built to contain it. Edward, Edward, Edward. I was going to die. It shouldn't matter if I thought of him now. Edward, I love you.

Through my narrowed eyes, I watched as Laurent slowly took a step forward. He seemed to appraise me, watching to see if I might try a futile attempt at escape.

But that's what it was, futile.

I was going to die. Edward, I'm sorry.

With what seemed to be a single, fluid motion – one that must have been performed a thousand different times with all the same end – he sprang across the gap between us, lifted my paralyzed face level with his, and his fangs unerringly sought my human neck. I felt the razor edges of his teeth sink effortlessly through my skin and his icy lips press firmly to my neck. I screamed as his sharp teeth gouged painfully deeper into my skin. I felt an icy cold wave of panic as I felt my blood drain away from me.

"Fight, don't give up!" my beautiful hallucination pleaded, but his voice – Edward's voice – seemed full of dread.

My brief scream faded.

I didn't want to fight anymore. Even if somehow my feeble strength could repel my attacker, even if somehow my clumsy body could outrun my predator, I couldn't bring myself to even bother trying. I was almost happy that it was over. Even if this death was painful, and terrifying, I was somewhat glad it would be over very soon. Darkness started to drift across my vision. I jammed my eyes shut, not wanting the last thing I saw to be the wild red eyes of my murderer.

I thought briefly of the clichés, about how you were suppose to see your life flash before your eyes. I was so much luckier. Who wanted to see a rerun, anyway?

I saw him, and I had no will to fight. It was so clear, so much more defined than any memory. My subconscious had stored Edward away in flawless detail, saving him for this final moment. I could see his perfect face as if he were really there; the exact shade of his icy skin, the shape of his lips, the line of his jaw, the gold glinting in his furious eyes. He was angry, naturally, that I was giving up. His teeth were clenched and his nostrils flared with rage.

"No! Bella, no!"

I first I thought I was hearing Edward's furious growl, but I quickly realized it was something else. Edward's growl wasn't nearly so rough and guttural. I then heard an entire chorus of these growls, and snarls. Laurent froze for the briefest moment, and suddenly dropped me, spinning to face whoever was challenging his kill. My knees buckled as my weight was returned to me, and I crumpled limply to the ground. My hand clapped weakly over my torn neck, feeling my hot blood flow fast from under my hand, lacing around my fingers.

My eyelids fluttered open, and I dimly registered massive dark shapes detaching themselves from the forest, hurtling themselves toward my would-be murderer. Five massive beasts seemed to descend upon the vampire, but I could hardly follow the movement with my eyes before Laurent fled with the animals pursuing him.

Confusion flooded me at the same time that the pain did. Now that I was free of the crushing grip and slicing fangs, I registered for the first time the fire. My neck was burning and the pain was quickly spreading and increasing as it slowly inched further from the bite with every beat of my heart. I realized what was happening with a start, and I realized that this time there would be no one to stop the spread like before, no one to draw out the venom quickly infecting my system with fire and pain.

No! I cried out at the hellishly cruel irony of this situation. I had only wanted to become a vampire to spend forever with Edward, and now, I was condemned to spend eternity without him.

The flames spread and the pain that accompanied them was unimaginable. I writhed and screamed as I tore at my neck, my fingers clawing uselessly at the fire, as if trying to extinguish them. But the flames refused to be swayed and, as if in protest to the idea of my trying to extinguish them, they suddenly grew more intense and I knew I've never felt such agony in my life. My hands drifted further from my neck as I clawed at the line of fire slowly razing through my body, and I screamed and cried out as more of my body was consumed in pain. By the time my whole body was plunged into the scalding flames, my throat was already hoarse from the screaming. But I continued regardless, it was utterly impossible to endure this pain silent. With my entire body now filled with fire, the pain unexpectedly rose and peaked, and rose again. I was temporarily stunned by the intensity of the flame, before my mind restarted with a single thought.

Let me die!

Let me die! Let me die! Let me die!

But I was trapped in the pain. I couldn't even comprehend the time as I was sucked into the endless moment of agony. It might have been seconds or hours, but it might as well have been an eternity in hell and fire as I lay in the meadow. The meadow where Edward first told me he loved me, but now the clearing held new memories for me, ones now forming as I flipped and writhed in the grass and dirt, gouging marks into the earth with my frantic body. Over my screaming, I faintly heard nearby growling, and it seemed a thousand deaths ago when I had first witnessed the dark beasts break out of the forest. The confusion filled whatever tiny portion of my head that wasn't already filled with pain as I now actually considered what actually had the tenacity and strength to challenge a vampire and now seemingly emerge alive.

But my thoughts could hardly unravel this mystery as the pain broke my thread of concentration. But now I could hear the beasts louder as they growled and snarled at each other, apparently only a short distance away. Hope suddenly filled me. Please kill me! Please kill me! I mentally chanted hoping the monsters would turn on me, finish me when the pain would not. I was aware when the snarling increased and I heard the violent sounds of fighting.

Why are you killing each other? It's me you want! Kill me! Please kill me!

A sudden chorus of howls filled the air. I dimly saw one of the beasts stalk closer to me and as it filled my vision I was suddenly able to register what it was. It was a wolf, a monstrous reddish brown beast with black eyes –black eyes that locked on my own with a frightening intelligence- and it seemed to slink hesitantly closer, a low whine escaped it's parted jaws. I realized I was still screaming from the pain, and I hoped that the sound wouldn't put the monster off killing me. Please kill me! But the animal turned, its hackles raised and faced the rest the giant wolves. A stream of yowls and snarls issued from the beast, and it seemed to back closer to me, protecting me from the four other wolves I now properly saw for the first time through my pain. The wolf in front was probably the largest and jet black. The wolves on its flanks were an assortment of colours. The black beast held its ground against the reddish wolf's fearsome noise. The black wolf seemed to switch its sight between me and the red wolf a number of times before finally issuing a long, loud howl. It ran toward the forest and the remaining three wolves seemed almost torn on whether to stay or follow the black monster before they too plunged into the forest.

Finally, I was alone with the russet wolf, who now turned to properly examine me. All I could do was scream with pain and wish for death, but death didn't come. The wolf sat beside me, gazing at me with an expression that didn't belong on an animal. It's brows seemed mashed together over it's frightening black eyes, and when it finally opened it's jaws – please bite me, please kill me! –only a low whining seemed to come out. Why wouldn't it kill me? Here I was, an impossibly easy meal for such a monster. It seemed determined to sit and gaze while I screamed and thrashed on the ground. The fire continued to rip through me, charring my body from the inside out. I couldn't focus on the wolf for much longer before the pain once again shredded my thread of thought. I tossed on the ground, breaking my stare with the wolf, and continued down the eternal moment of pain.

As I continued to endure the fire, I slowly began to think around it, and I was vaguely able to mark a passing of time as the sky started to darken. Other than that, I was only aware of the monstrous wolf that continued to sit and watch me. Confused, but unable to attempt to understand through my pain, I finally decided that hoping for death from this beast was a lost cause.

The time came when the darkness of night shrouded the meadow and I was lost in the agonising pain of fire. If it weren't for the mysterious wolf beside me with its heavy breathing and occasional whine, I couldn't have been sure if time even existed anymore. What should have been a million burnt deaths later, the sky seemed to lighten, but there was no change in the blistering tongues of flame that ravaged my body.

I thrashed and shrieked while the flames continued to lick through my veins with searing agony. As the sky brightened further, I started feeling some slow change. Both my mind and senses were slowly shifting. I could now hear the wolf's low breathing with remarkable clarity and the hidden river near the meadow seemed louder than before. I could smell the upturned earth and grass from my thrashings with new appreciation, but was also mildly repulsed by the wet dog scent that rolled off of my watching companion. As well, my mind slowly revealed new space to me – more space to suffer in – but also to think.

The fire raged on inside my body, unrelenting, with no change. But now I took advantage of the mysterious beast beside me, using its low even breathing to mark the time. I concentrated on them, slowly attempting to grapple with my screams so that I might count them. It took every last drop of what little willpower I had to muffle my shrieks just enough so that I could listen. Nine thousand, seven hundred twenty two of these breaths later, I noticed that the sky once again darkened. And once again I was thrown into a blind hell, with only the racking fire and quiet wolf to keep me company.

Eleven thousand, four hundred five heavy breaths later, the sky slowly began to lighten again to mark the second day. There seemed to be so much more space in my head now, and I was able to wonder more about my bewildering companion. No answer came to me, how could it survive after chasing Laurent? No way could any animal, even one as massive as the one next to me, could kill a vampire. Beside this train of thought, I was also able to mourn this horrible turn of events, wonder about my endless future, able to think ahead to the seemingly impossible end of this blazing hell, the hell whose scalding flames continue to chew at my body.

When the sky started to prematurely darken as the clouds thickened over the clearing, the wolf seemed to finally break out of its mysterious role of sentinel. It bent low over me until I was able to meet its dark eyes, and gave a single low whine before turning and walking into the forest. I wondered why, and some strange part of me felt sad and confused to see it go. Despite its unknown motives, I felt grateful for it watching over me and I wanted it to come back to help me pull through this excruciating pain with its unwavering presence and slow breathing. The loss of this simple repetitive sound unnerved me, it was enough to will myself to slow my writhing and completely muffle my cries so that I might listen out for its return.

I was shocked by how much I heard. Now, that I was focused on my hearing, a barrage of new noises filled my head. Over my ragged breathing and rapid heartbeat, I heard as the wind picked up and whispered through the grass before tousling the leaves in the trees into an audible scraping. In the branches of the trees, I heard the ruffling of birds and below in the brush was the rummaging of small rodents. The hidden stream was practically deafening now that I listened to it. But I was unable to locate the monstrous wolf. I waited while listening to the forest around me, a strange hope filling me that my companion might return.

Some time passed before I picked up the light padding of paws through the forest undergrowth and I felt mysteriously elated that the wolf didn't decide to abandon me after all. Along with its entrance came a wave of its disgusting wet dog smell, but it also brought forth a new scent, one that was very sweet and warm smelling and I found that my mind snapped onto this scent with a single mindedness that would have had me pursuing its source if I hadn't been paralyzed in pain. The wolf gave me a long stare; I wondered if I resembled the charcoal briquette I felt like. It seemed as if I must be just a pile of charred bones by now. Every cell in my body had been razed to ash. The wolf seemed to give a heavy sigh and settled back down in its old position to continue to watch me.

The sky continued to darken further with grey clouds as I resumed listening to the wolf's calm breathing. I picked up an odd pittering noise, one that came from all around me and became louder as the minutes passed. It took me a slow few minutes to figure out it was the rain, after all I couldn't even feel the cool droplets against my searing skin. The rain increased and I was aware when my vision blurred as the water gathered on my face. I closed my eyes to keep the rain out of them, and decided it wouldn't be worth opening them for a while since the dark night was coming soon anyways. I continued burning through the long night, and finally morning came once again.

It was day three, the last day hopefully. What would this mean now, that I was about to become a vampire? What would I do? Where would I go? Charlie. What about him and Jake?

I wallowed in these thoughts for a while, letting them occupy the portion of my mind not filled with burning and agony. Outside my mind, I continued to keep my eyes shut, and I was able to gain control of my voice enough to stay quiet. I was somewhat glad that if this did have to happen, that it happened here out in the middle of nowhere. I couldn't fathom how someone could hide and stay quiet enough to avoid discovery in a city. I wondered how he'd done it?

I was about to change my train of thought, it was doing no good to think about them, when suddenly the pain changed. On the good-news side of things, it started to fade from my fingertips and toes. Fading slowly, but at least it was doing something new. This had to be it. The pain was on its way out...

And then the bad news. The fire in my throat wasn't the same as before. I wasn't only on fire, but I was now parched, too. Dry as bone. So thirsty. Burning fire, and burning thirst...

Also bad news: The fire inside my heart got hotter.

How was that possible?

My heartbeat, already too fast, picked up – the fire drove its rhythm to a new frantic pace. The fire retreated from my palms, leaving them blissfully pain-free and cool. But it retreated to my heart, which blazed hot as the sun and beat at a furious new speed. The loudest sound in the clearing was my frenzied heart, pounding to the rhythm of the fire.

I steadfastly kept my eyes locked shut when the increasing pain caused a scream to break through my silent façade. My new shockingly musical cry did little to distract me from the excruciating pain in my heart.

Quickly, my wrists became free, though, and my ankles. The fire was totally extinguished there. The fire ripped hotter still through my chest, draining in from my elbows and knees. And then – oh!

My heart took off, beating like helicopter blades, the sound almost a single sustained note; it felt like it would grind through my ribs. The fire flared up in the center of my chest, sucking the last remnants of the flames from the rest of my body to fuel the most scorching blaze yet. The pain was enough to stun me, and I found I couldn't have screamed if I wanted to. My back arched, bowed as if the fire was dragging me upward by my heart. It became a battle inside me – my sprinting heart racing against the attacking fire. Both were losing. The fire was doomed, having consumed everything that was combustible; my heart galloped toward its last beat. The fire constricted, concentrating inside that one remaining human organ with a final, unbearable surge. The surge was answered by a deep, hollow-sounding thud. My heart stuttered twice, and then thudded quietly again just once more.

There was no sound. No breathing. Not even mine.

For a moment, the absence of pain was all I could comprehend.

And then I opened my eyes and gazed above me in wonder.