Hi, finally Indigo Demon here. Sorry for not posting new chaps on my stories for a while. For those people who want to know what happened to my Jessica, my lovely pet rat, well she is still with the vet in the hospital for animals. The vet was asking for some blood donation from Blue_Mermaid 05 and Yellow_Butterfly 04's two pet rats, Mika, Blue's black rat with a white stripe from the middle of her head to the end of her back, and Nika, Yellow's white rat with a black stripe from the middle of her head to the end of her back.(LOL, what a coincidence, they have twin rats too!) I'm still very sad and also not in mood for helping Blue and Yellow create the new improved chapters for my story. (Yellow insisted that I should rest for a while. She said she will write the new chapters, but it had too many misspellings and grammar mistakes, if not for Blue who edit ALMOST everything she wrote.) This story is full of angst of what I'm feeling right now, so I decided to write it. Hope it will satisfy you. Sorry I'm too lazy and too sad and hurt to write at least some happy stories...

Rin Kagamine sighed in bliss. She loved how the beautiful crimson streaks decorated her arms, while maps of black-and-purple showed themselves across her skin. She loved how painful her wounds, scars, and bruises are, and how a pretty color her blood is. She stared at the girl in the mirror who stared back at her. Dried tears are visible on her colorless cheeks, and it traveled down her chin. Her shiny and soft blonde hair is now messier and darker. Her cerulean eyes are now dull, and her soft lips are now dry and chapped. She gave out a laugh. "Of course he will never love me. I'm nothing, nothing like HER." She thought, but the mere thought of that girl, that bitch, drove her to the edge. She hated every fiber of her being. She hated how her long teal colored hair tied in twin pigtails swayed in the wind. Her hair is very pixie cut, like a boy cut, seeing it only reaches to the end of her neck, and it only gets blown and messy even though she had her white hairclips in her hair. Her breast size was a C-cup, while hers just a mere B-cup and won't perch on her arms, like hers. Even though it's a B-cup, some people even commented that she's still a flat chest. Rin was the shortest one in her class, while she was the third tallest one. Rin was the most stupid pupil in their class, while she was one of the smartest and honor pupils in school. Rin's voice was very high and annoying (according to some people); while she had the most amazing voice you've ever heard. Rin was the loner of the school, while she was the most popular and richest one in their school. Heck, even her long time best friend, Miki, joined her and her gang, and now she didn't have any friends besides Teto Kasane and Neru Akita. "Damn her. Damn that Miku Hatsune. Damn that bitch to hell!" Rin cursed in her empty mind. She was lonely, and hurt. She was tired, tired of hiding her feelings, tired of crying her heart out, tired of hating that Miku and most of all, tired of loving him. Of loving her PERFECT twin brother. Yes, she loved him, that perfect, handsome and A-plus student Len Kagamine. Rin loved him ever since they were fourteen, and he always listens and play with her, until Miku came into the picture. She remembered how he asked for her help to confess to that GIRL, 5 years ago.

Flashback:

"Rin, Rin, Rin!" Len cried as he panted, probably from running across the schoolyard to catch up with her. "What is it, Len-Len?" Rin asked, looking confused at her twin. "I-I wanted T-To con-confess to someone..." He replied, looking in her eyes. "W-who?" Rin asked, trying hard to maintain her excitement that her twin brother will confess to her. Hope that he did returned her feelings, Hope that he loved her too. "I wanted to confess to Miku, Rin! Doesn't she look beautiful and amazing? I want to be with her!" Len happily said to her. She felt her heart crack and split into two. Her body died and her mind vanished from the world. "Just confess to her. I'm sure she'll accept you." She said, in a cold tone. Then she walked away, ignoring her twin who said "Thanks, Rin!" and ran away. She never looked back, for she knew that he will never, ever love and accept her as his lover, for they are twins. She cried in her room the whole afternoon.

End flashback

"Ughhh…. It hurts so much Len, it hurts…" Rin hugged her cold and pale body to herself. For once, she wanted to see pain and hurt in his face once he saw her like this. She wanted the flash of realization in his face that it's his entire fault. It have always been. Everything she does, every breath she breathe, every day she live, and every day she loved him was all for him, even the torture she always does to herself was her way of calming down from killing Miku. Maybe if she moved on, but she couldn't. No boy will like her. They will only use her for their own pleasure. Len was an exception, but he already claimed Miku's innocence and virginity. Ted, Teto's brother, will like her for being herself, but she couldn't leave her forbidden feelings for Len. "Time will never heal this damage on me. Len, please, for once I wanted you to be mine and say those three forbidden words to me. Kiss me with your forbidden lips…" Her mouth trembled as her body shivered from cold. "Death… Death is the only way out, right?" A cold, chilling voice inside Rin's head said. Rin seemed to consider it for a moment, but she remembered Len will only mourned for her, she will leave him alone. "But," she thought "Miku will heal those wounds. Time will heal his sadness and loss for me. Even better, I will not feel the fire of pain and jealousy attack my body again. I will not suffer to get his attention and loyalty again, and I will not hurt myself and shed a tear for him again. I've got enough of this torture, and I'm only wishing him and Miku will grow up and have a happy family without me." Rin smiled bitterly and sadly as she went to her room to get a paper and some pen to write her suicide note, for Len. Moments later, she stood on the veranda of her room. She was 5 stories up and the wind was very chilling, considering it's almost winter, but she didn't care. She didn't care if her wounds are still fresh and blood was pouring, her bruises are still stinging, her scars are re-opened in the chilly wind, because this was all for Len. Because she LOVED him. Because it hurt so much that she desperately wanted to end her love, her torture, her erotic fantasies, her haunting dreams and nightmares, her world, everything. And now it's time to do it. Without any hesitation, she jumped. She waited for the impact, a smile forming itself in her lips. Her tears are left in the wind, being carried away. Soon, she felt the ground, and she felt her skull cracked. Blood began to pour out of her head and her mouth, yet the smile never left her lips. If one will see her, she looks like an angel, bathed in her very own tainted blood.

Meanwhile, a lonely figure of a teenage boy walked through the empty streets toward his home. A boy who goes by the name Len Kagamine. His ocean blue eyes searched his neighborhood for the familiar figure of his house. He sighed, relieved and happy, that he ended his relationship with the school's most popular girl, Miku Hatsune. Lately, he began to develop a very strange feeling toward his twin sister, Rin Kagamine, and he knew instantly it was love. Miku understood him, and let him go to his real love. He now knew that there is a line between like and love. He only liked Miku for she was pretty and amazing, but not for her real self. He loved Rin because of her gentleness and sibling love for him. He didn't care if they are twins, all he knew that his feeling are deep enough to prove that he loved her. He inserted the key to his house, excited and a little afraid that he will be rejected, and opened the door. He thought about an unreal rumor spread by Mikuo and Kaito, that he had done "it" with Miku. He pushed the thought aside, and proceeded to confess to Rin. The house was so silent. "She's probably sleeping. It's almost 11 o' clock already." He thought, looking at the clock. He happily went to the bathroom, taking off his wet jacket from the rain that happened a little while earlier, and thinking about tickling her and surprising her with his confession on her bed, just like the old times they played together. As he threw his jacket to the hamper, he froze. There on the sink was a razor with a little dried blood in it. The rest was fresh. He panicked. "Wh-what happened?" He desperately thought, noticing the bloodstains on the tiles floor. He followed its trail, up to Rin's room. He gulped. "Something… If something happened to Rin, I'll-!" He stopped mid-thought. In Rin's room, there was lots of wet tissues and some handkerchiefs. His first thought was "Was she sick?" but he soon noticed a bloodstained paper. His world slowly crumbled as he picked it up and read it. Written on the paper was:

Dear Len,

I wonder if you ever loved me more than your twin sister. Of course you wouldn't. Because you loved her, that girl with the name of Miku Hatsune. I wish I was the one who always received your kisses, not her. The one who you always hug, I wish I was her. The one you will always share your thoughts with, I wish I was her. You get it, don't you? I was jealous of Miku. I always wished that I wasn't your twin sister, so it will not be forbidden. I knew about your perfection, and I'm not going to taint your feelings. But if you only knew that it hurts. It hurt me so much that you are always with Miku, not me. I've always cried my heart out, knowing the painful truth about us. I've always tortured myself, trying not to release my anger and jealousy. I've always wanted and waited you to be mine, but I'm tired already of chasing after you again and again. For once, Len, I want your lips saying those three forbidden words. You kissing me with your forbidden lips. For once, I wanted you to be mine and I'm yours, but that will never happen now doesn't it? I have enough Len. I'll end this forbidden unending feeling of mine, then I'll sleep forever. Time will heal those wounds, I know, but (a tear smudge) I hope you and Miku will have a happy family together. I LOVE YOU LEN, but it's forbidden and your heart had been stolen and belongs only to her.

(Tear smudge) Rin(a blood stain)

Len stood speechless. His throat burned, as he tried to choke his tears. She loved him, why haven't he saw this before? He sank to his knees, then suddenly a very cold breeze hit him. He looked around, then noticed the window was open. He looked around the streets on the veranda, noticing a snow storm coming (he remembered the news) but a faint figure on the ground caught his eye. Worried, he ran down the stairs, not bothering to wear something thick. As he reached the figure, he gasped. There lay Rin's cold and lifeless body, blood was coming out of her head. He sank to his knees again, then carefully lifted Rin's head to his arms, not believing that she, his beloved twin sister, was dead. He hugged her close, as he screamed at the top of his lungs. Tears fell endlessly down his face, some hitting Rin's face and chest. He began to mutter "I love you" again and again, but he knew that she will not hear his true feelings or feel his warmth. Even if he wanted to hear her voice, he knew that she will not speak again. The snow storm got worse, their figures are hardly seen by everyone. Len laid down hugging Rin's body, then kissing her cold lips and then her forehead. He closed his eyes, before vowing "I promise you Rin, I will love you forever. And we will be together forever." "Wait for me, Rin. Len will come for you." He thought, letting the snow bury their bodies together.

Ha, I love writing angst and romance. The snow scene was inspired by Rin & Len's song Proof of Life and Soundless Voice. That's my first one shot, so please review! =) =) =)