Summary: Anti-Freddie has eaten Her Freddie. Sam-centric implied Seddie.

Author's Note: For the Dasey Nation 2008 Secret Santa, Happy Holidays MeganJonas[DaseyShipper]!

Disclaimer: Rosie does not own iCarly. If she did the iKiss episode would have aired months ago.

Some spoilers for the iKiss stuff that leaked onto the web a few weeks ago.

A Tale of Two Freddies

She laughs at him when he tells her he has never been kissed. It's so typically Freddie, blurting out things like that. But, to Sam's surprise, he didn't tell Carly first. She is told before his supposed 'true love' and Sam can't help but grin when Carly does find out.

"What about Valerie?" the brunette asks, referring to the fact that she clearly saw him lock lips with his freakizoid ex-girlfriend.

"She doesn't count…" he mumbles, shuffling his feat and not meeting her gaze. Freddie always gets this way around Carly. He looses all the confidence that Sam has worked so hard to instill in him through her insults. It's pathetic, really, how he cowers before her, how he acts so differently around her. Sam hates this Freddie, not her Freddie. The Freddie that retorts with such venom to her verbal abuse, the one who glares daggers at her and plans 'Wake Up, Spence' with her at the wee hours of the morning, he's the real Freddie. Wimpy little lover boy who follows Carly Shay around like a lost little puppy is not Freddie.

Quite some time ago Sam started calling them Her Freddie and Anti-Freddie.

"Why? To evil?" Carly suggests with a giggle.

"More like too bitchy…" Sam hisses under her breath. This earns her a glare from Freddie and she just smirks in reply.

"Yeah, I guess so," he's agreeing to Carly and ignoring her. Nothing out of the ordinary, this is Anti-Freddie we're talking about here.

"I just want a first kiss that means something, you know?" Freddie says, giving Carly a meaningful look. She smiles a sheepish little smile, humoring him. Sam thinks it stupid, how Carly refuses to turn him down to his face. If she did maybe Anti-Freddie would go away for good.

When she blabs to all of the iCarly viewers that he hasn't had his real first kiss, he doesn't speak to her for a week. It is the worst week of Sam's life. She's too damn stubborn to say she's sorry and Freddie won't even be in the same room as her. They don't do iCarly that week. Their fans send a ton of emails, inquiring why there was no show. Carly replies to them all, saying that Sam and Freddie are being stupid and aren't speaking. A couple of fans reply to Carly's reply and Sam reads one of them.

To:

From: SeddieShipper8743

Carly,

It's because of the whole 'Freddie's never been kissed and who would want to kiss the dork anyway' thing, isn't it? That was kind of mean, even for Sam. But, maybe she was just acting on emotions? My parents are shrinks and they say people act with emotions first and think about it second. I donno, maybe Freddie did something to hurt Sam? You should probably talk to her about it.

From,

SS

Sam deletes the message before Carly can see it. The last thing Sam needs is to be psychoanalyzed by a kid with shrink parents.

On day ten their strained silence, Sam cracks. She needs to talk to him, needs to make sure that Anti-Freddie hasn't eaten Her Freddie.

"Hey, dork!" she greets him, like nothing has changed. Perhaps if she pretends the argument never happened he will too.

"What do you want?" he snaps, slamming his locker. Success! Her Freddie is still there!

"Look," she grabs his shoulder and jerks him about to face her, "I'm sorry, okay?"

He's too shocked to say anything in reply. Freddie blinks at her, gaping like a fish out of water.

"Hello!" she calls, waving a hand before his face, "Earth to Freddork!"

"What…oh, yeah. I guess I'm sorry too."

"Sorry for what?" Sam asks, confused.

"I kinda blew this thing out of proportion," he admits and Sam knows that he's trying to swallow his pride as well, "You shouldn't have done that."

"Yeah, I know." The bell that signals the start of fourth period rings. Neither of them move as their fellow students scurry to their next class.

"Why did you, then?"

"I don't know. I was angry, I guess." Sam starts to walk away because she is so not ready to have this conversation. To her surprise, he grabs her wrist as she turns to leave.

"You're always angry, Sam," he informs her, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

She shook her head. "It's different this time, Freddie."

He arches an eyebrow and she sighs in defeat.

"It's just…you know the looks you give Carly? The 'I wuv looks'?"

"Yeah…"

"They are starting to drive me insane. Actually, they've ALWAYS drove me insane." Sam instantly regrets what has been said and tries to make a break for it. Once again, Freddie stops her.

"Why would you care?"

"Because Carly's not the only girl in the world!"

"She's the only one I love!"

"That's because you're too stupid to open your eyes, you jerk!"

She storms off, muttering about stupid tech boys.

Freddie stands there in confusion, a small smile on his face as she stomps away. "Hey, Sam!"

"What!" she yells, not bothering to turn around.

"Want to get some ham after school? My treat?"

"Whatever."

He takes that as a 'yes'.