Disclaimer: I do not own Artemis Fowl in any way…..unfortunately.

Practice

It was a beautiful June day. The birds were singing, wind played through longs blades of grass, horses neighed softly, and honeybees buzzed between brightly colored flowers. A beautiful day, but Artemis Fowl II couldn't care less.

The sixteen year old Irish genius stood across a grassy field from his best friend, Captain Holly Short of the LEP. Normally, Artemis would find very good company in the elf, but today was different. Today he was downright scared of the red head.

Shortly after returning from a time travelling adventure with Holly, Artemis had finally requested to start working out and getting physically fit. However, Butler had come this morning to propose a change of plans to Artemis. Because of his age, Butler said, and the apparent height difference, Artemis would need a separate trainer, at least for physical combat. Artemis had assumed Butler meant his younger sister, Juliet, but, for one of the few times in his life, had been wrong. And now, several hours and many protests later, he stood across a grassy field from Holly Short.

'This is just preposterous,' the boy thought to himself. 'I'm standing in the middle of a horse pasture, wearing sweatpants and a tee-shirt with Holly, preparing to fist fight. Butler must be getting senile in his old age.'

"Okay, let's get started Artemis," called Holly. She was wearing the LEP uniform she had arrived in. Commander Trouble Kelp had only given her the weekend off, so their training would have to be intensive in order to cover everything Butler wanted Artemis to know how to do.

"This is preposterous," Artemis repeated, aloud, "I don't even understand why you volunteered to do this is the first place."

Holly crossed her arms and cocked her head to one side, "I'm paying Butler and you a favor. Plus, it's just a little payback for what happened eight years ago."

"I said I was sorry!" Artemis cried, his voice almost a whine.

"Hmmph. Well anyways, I've got to teach you self defense. You won't be able to rely on Butler or me your entire life you know."

Artemis sighed and looked up at the pristine blue sky. He'd just have to grin and bear it, so to speak, "Fine, let's go."

"Good, okay, first I'm going to teach you a simple block. Come closer," Holly stepped forward and Artemis followed suit until the two stood with a few feet between them, "Right. Now, hit me and I'll show you the block."

"Hit….you?" Artemis stuttered.

"Yes hit me, or don't you know how?" Holly scoffed.

"Of course!" Artemis shot back, "It's just that I was just raised not to hit women."

Holly burst out laughing, a sound that rang like bells and echoed across the empty pasture, "I was right; you probably haven't hit anything in your life. Artemis, I'm sure your parents were right in saying 'don't hit girls' and all that, but, in this case, I think its okay."

"But it's unfair," Artemis floundered, pulling out life lessons from his childhood, "Girls aren't as physically strong as boys. It's a scientific fact."

Holly laughed again, holding her stomach, "That's nice Arty, but look at you. You consider walking from your study to the kitchen a work out. I've been training my entire life. It's just that kind of stereotyping that's given me so much trouble in the LEP. Girls can be just as strong as boys, and most times, have a hell of a lot more common sense."

Artemis knew he had been defeated, but, always one to get the last word in said, "Fowl Manor is very large you know."

"Just punch me. I promise you won't lay a finger on me."

Spurred by her words, Artemis swung at Holly, and just as she said, his hand was easily slapped away.

"Nice one, try again," she encouraged. Artemis did and once again his he failed to touch Holly, "Okay, now you try to block me."

"What?!"

"Just do what I did, when I try to punch you, block me with your arms," Holly said, bouncing on the balls of her feet like a real boxer.

Artemis was about to reply, but before he could say a word; Holly sent a rabbit punch at his chest. The boy made no attempt to stop his friend, and Holly stopped her fist an inch from Artemis' body. She looked up at him angrily.

"Hey! You didn't even try to stop me! Block with your arms!" Holly yelled, "You won't learn anything if you don't even try to stop me."

His pride stung, Artemis planted his feet and waited for Holly to hit him again. Then, in a moment of brilliance, he remembered a move he had one see Butler try in a wrestling match against Juliet. Now was the time to impress his trainer and make Butler proud.

"Okay, here we go," Holly said, and swung her arm.

Artemis' hand, with uncharacteristic speed, caught Holly's clenched first and spun her arm around her back, wrenching her tiny shoulder. Caught off guard by the new move, Holly's instincts kicked in and she threw all her weight forward, trying to pull her opponent over her and onto the ground. Normally, this would work, but thanks to Artemis' extra weight and inches, caused the two friends to fall into a crumpled heap on the soft green grass.

"D'Arvit, Artemis, why did you do that?" Holly swore, her head on Artemis' and her limbs tangled with his.

"Male testosterone I guess," the genius mumbled, trying to stand up. Holly was too quick though, and was soon kneeling beside him with her hands on either side of his neck.

"You could have seriously injured yourself! I was trying to teach you a simple block, not how to make a fool of yourself! What's with males and always trying to prove themselves?"

Artemis looked up into Holly's eyes, which glinted with fury and was suddenly very aware of their, er…positions. Holly kneeling over the 'injured' Artemis…..even the long grass matched that of the infamous gorilla cage.

Holly must have noticed Artemis blush, "Aren't you listening to me? You Mud Men are all the same. Stubborn, misogynistic, stupid-"

Unfortunately, we'll never get to know what other adjectives Holly meant to use to describe Artemis, because at that moment, in an impulsive move, Artemis reached out and grabbed Holly's shoulders, pulling her down on to his chest and her lips to his. Holly tried to resist, but Artemis held her to his chest, his hands on her back. After a moment, Holly gave in, relaxed against Artemis' chest and reached up to tangle her fingers in his raven locks.

Surfacing minutes later, Artemis let go of Holly and she rolled off him, landing with a soft thump in the grass beside him. Happiness and contentment filled the boy's chest like a candle's glow, and for once, all his worries, all the stress of being a criminal mastermind disappeared.

After a while of silence, Holly said sheepishly,

"Well Mud Boy, for all your faults, I'll have to admit that there is something boys can do better than girls."

"Oh yes? What is that Holly?" Artemis said triumphantly.

Holly's lips turned up in a smile, "Why, elf-kissing of course. After all, you have had quite a lot of practice."

Artemis stood up, then grabbed Holly's tiny hands and lifted her to her feet, "Come on, let's get back to training. Butler will want to see some progress by the end of the weekend."

Holly brushed the grass off her uniform, "Alright, get ready to block. And no fancy moves this time, I thought I told you your elf-kissing days were over."

Artemis smirked and quickly kissed Holly again, "You're just jealous."

Holly's fist swung.

****

Author's Note: The idea for this short piece of fluff hit me while vacuuming, if you can believe it. As my other fic, 'While You Were Out' has neither Artemis nor Holly in it; I thought I'd take a break and write some A/H. I hope I succeeded in getting the characters correct and that the situation wasn't too unrealistic. Thank you for reading, and please review! Constructive criticism is appreciated.