Dislcaimer: I DON'T OWN NARUTO!
Rated for: Angst
Please enjoy this! I wrote it about two years ago and I just found it! I typed it up and edited it to the product you now have before you! Please enjoy!
It hurts. The pain in my chest refuses to leave me. The cold stares bore down into the depths of my soul. What did I do wrong? How did I hurt these people? What would merit them to loathe me with such a passion? I try, I help, I have feelings. I have a dream. I am a person.
Their icy stares freeze my body into complete isolation. Their harsh cries rip into my very being. I sit alone in the darkness. Cold, wet tears streak my cheeks.
Why am I looked down on like trash? Why am I seen as such a horrid mistake of an existence? I'm a broken toy, I only wish I knew where to find a mender. I wish I could come home to a smiling face, somebody to care for me, to love me.
Everything I know of life is pain. If this is what life is, then why is death fared? Death seems like a safe haven, a place to escape to. A place where I would no longer drown in such utter and complete darkness.
Why don't I get a choice? Others get to choose whether to do actions that will lead to others hating them. I, however, was never given that sweet serenity. Why is it that being normal is one pleasure I have never been graced with? Am I too far gone to be loved? Am I to forever be hated and despised?
To those people, I am a sign of death, a sign of fear, a bad omen. A demon. No matter how far or fast I run, I always fall. No mater how much I smile or laugh, I always cry. No matter how much I love and give, I am always hated. Always being suppressed by their fears. They cut me deep and een after the wound heals, the scar reminds, to remind me. They have a permanent existence imprinted on my tainted soul.
Some things, time can not fix. Some things, are forever existent. There is no light in my dark hole of solitude. My dreams are not pleasant. Nightmares lurk around every corner of my mind and I fear sleep.
When I'm afraid, nobody is there to hold me. When I cry, nobody is there to kiss away my tears, when I bleed nobody is there to bandage the wound. I'm still bleeding.
As days grow and I mature the hole is my chest expands. The pain makes it hard to see. When they look at me it's even harder to breath than when they don't look.
All this time, I've been completely alone, inside and out. The voice in my head screams at me to kill, laughs at my pain. Even my own soul is trying to destroy my very being. It drives me into madness. I'm done pretending to live, because living without a purpose is the same thing as being dead. I will kill this pain.
The silver blade reaches my throat and caresses my pale skin. Just before the penetration, a voice screams out. A light flashes in the dark. Just another trick… Like with Yashamaru…. I place the blade back into position.
"I want to die…" I whisper in a low, dead tone, knowing full well that nobody will head the final, disguised cry for help. I lost hope of that long ago. Here finally, is my suicide. My release. The destructive soul that haunts me can have it. It can have my body. I don't want it anymore.
"Gaara!" There's that voice again. Why does it keep yelling? Leave me alone! I've finally been allowed to go free! Let me go!
"Gaara! Open our eyes!" My eyes are open! This voice, why does it speak in such a confusing way? I press harder with the sleek blade. I try to finish the job when I am stopped by a warm hand.
"Please. Open your eyes and see what the world can be." The voice had an under laying melancholic aura. It was clear to me. I recognized the sound. The owner of this voice new pain like I did. I released a low sigh and closed my eyes, opening them soon after. Not to be greeted by the familiar darkness, but a bright smiling face.
Bright blonde hair and brilliant blue eyes gazed into my own teal ones. The years of pain and suffering clear in them, and yet… A glimmer of joy, of hope.
The blonde boy grabbed hold of my hand and said, in the softest of tones, "Pain is something that exist. Feeling hurt, anguished, not knowing where to turn… It hurts. Having people stare at you with disgust when having no valid reason. Things beyond our control have marked us as sinners, demons. Gaara, we are people. We've been force to walk the path of evil and cruelty. Chasing the mirage of a dream that we no longer believe in… We know what sadness and pain is… That's why we won't ever have to suffer like that again. We know what it feels like to be alone. That's why we'll forever be one." His warm hand tightened around, my own, spreading heat through my cold body. He smiled and nodded when I returned the gesture. I have someone to talk to. I will never be alone. Those words embedded themselves deep with my heart.
"Thank you… Uzumaki Naruto"
I hope you enjoyed this angsty little tid bit! If you did, please let me know!I worked hard on writing this (that's my story and I'm sticking to it), so it'd be pretty sweet if you could take a moment to review!
Review -Lunar!