The Lost Decade…
For millions of poor souls in Japan, it was a time of wretched despair. The country's economy crumbled away, leaving the citizens to wallow in the worst of emotions.
Their frustration in constantly being laid off, their anxiety as they counted the remaining yen in their pocket, their sorrow as they sit together at an empty dinner table, and their utter hopelessness in such a time.
These dissenting sentiments spread like a plague across the country, from the smallest of single houses to the towering cities. They infected the minds of not only adults, but the pubescent, and even the children.
…In some instances, they even tainted the very unborn.
When did my life begin? Heh, now there's a damn good question.
I know that the typical answer should be 'when I was born', but that doesn't feel like the right answer for me.
Why? Because I remember jack shit about the first couple years after my birth. The only thing I can recall from those days was the blurry sight of a decrepit apartment, illuminated by a single lamp, as an old man scribbled away on several papers while countless glass bottles surrounded him.
If there was any moment where I felt like my life actually began, it would be the day that my older sister and me were led out of that apartment by a bunch of police officers. She held me close with a tight embrace as we were led to the outside of the complex. Once we were out, the rain soaked my hair in just a single second, right before my sister was given an umbrella, and held it over both of our heads.
That's when I saw the bright red lights of the police sirens, piercing through the nighttime fog as countless cars and policemen surrounded a limp body. As the sound of the raindrops and the sirens settled in my ears, I could hear them muttering things like "He must've jumped from the very top…" and "Can't say I blame the poor guy, given how miserable he looks". When I tried to take a step closer to see, Sis pulled me right back to where I was standing, and used her spare hand to cover my eyes. As she held me, I could feel her arms trembling, and hear her throat filling up with tears…
We were soon taken to what I later discovered was an orphanage, and brought into a room filled with a bunch of other kids. Some looked about as old as me, others looked about as old as Sis, but none of them looked all too happy to be there.
We were told that all of the kids were our new best friends, but that turned out to be a complete crock of shit.
Because the only thing that I remember from that damn place was the teasing laughs that came from all of the kids, and the sharp sting in my eyes as they grew moist from that very laughter.
Sis let me softly cry in her lap once each day had ended, and gently stroked the top of my head, telling me that everything will be all right.
I didn't know exactly what she meant when she said that, until one fateful night…
"Shoji…" Sis whispered my name as she gently shook my shoulder while I was sleeping. Once I noticed her, I slowly blinked until I could keep my eyes completely open.
"Huh? What is it Sis?" I asked in a low whisper as I tilted my head back to see her. Even within the thick darkness of the orphanage bedrooms, I could make out her gentle amber eyes, and her head of striking crimson hair; the same color as mine.
"Get up, we hafta get outside." She told me with a rather peppy smile, and quietly began to pull off the blanket I was underneath. At first, the chill of the cold air crawled across my skin, leaving goosebumps wherever they went, but that didn't stop me from getting out of the bed and standing right next to my sister.
She gave me a quick smile before quickly putting my clothes on, and took a hold of my hand as we tiptoed our way through the bedroom. Once we reached a simple wall, Sis raised her whole leg up, and carefully placed her foot on the wooden box of toys, making sure that not even the smallest creak came from it in the process. She then slowly lifted herself up on top of the toy box, where it turns out that the window above it was right in her grasp now.
I heard Sis open up the window with a faint click, and then looked up to see her offering her hand for me.
"Come on up Shoji." She told me in that calm and reassuring voice of hers. After hearing that, I managed to swallow the slight fear that was bubbling inside me, and took a hold of her hand. Sis hoisted me right up onto the toy box with her, and even lifted me up with her arms, which allowed me to be right in from of the window.
Out of instinct, I opened the window up, and Sis stood up on her tippy toes to let my head through it.
"Shoji, look to your right, okay?" Sis whispered as she kept holding me up. I was a bit surprised at first, but I did what she said, and looked to the right, where I saw a long array of roots growing on the outside of the orphanage.
"Do you see the weeds that are growing on the side of the building?" She asked me, to which I responded with a simple 'm-hm'.
"Good. Grab onto it." She told me.
"H-huh?" I answered back in a fit of worry, as the fears that I was holding began to come back out. It didn't help that the roots didn't look all-too pleasant to hold.
"C'mon Shoji, we hafta hurry if we want to get out of here…!" Sis's voice was especially distressed now, even as she continued to keep it low. "I'm not gonna let you stay with all of those mean kids after all."
I felt a flurry of butterflies rattle in my stomach. I was nervous as hell to continue, but Sis had a really good point, and I didn't want to let her down. As such, I reached a single hand out of the window, and latched on to the closest weed.
"Okay, good job." Sis told me happily as she heard the soft crunch of the plant in my tiny palm. "Now the other hand."
I gave a simple nod, and carefully placed my other arm out of the window as well. My sister even gave me a small push to help me even further out, and I could reach another root on the side of the orphanage. Once Sis gave me another push up, fitting my entire torso through the rim. From there, I lifted up one leg out of the window as well, just like how Sis lifted her whole leg onto the toy box, and immediately lifted my other leg out as well, practically swinging out of the orphanage as I held onto the roots with the tightest grip.
Once I planted my feet on the outside wall of the building, I cautiously lowered myself step by step, until I finally reach the ground.
I look back up at the window, and already see Sis's head popping out of it as she reached for a root herself. With a swift movement of her legs, she leapt through the window, and slowly descended to the ground just as I did.
"Okay…" She muttered once she was standing next to me. "Now let's get out of here Shoji."
I immediately nodded to her, and took a hold of her hand as we ran from the orphanage as far as our bare feet could take us. That led us into the thickness of the industrial jungle that was Iwatodai.
…I don't really remember anything from that event though. Whenever I try to resurface any memories about how we managed to traverse the city in the middle of the night, all I find is a giant blur as black as the night itself.
I know why though; I must've fallen asleep at some point, to which Sis began carrying me on her back as she weaved her way through Iwatodai for the both of us. I know that because when I woke up the next day, I found myself curled up in her arms, while she was still dead asleep in the middle of an abandoned alleyway. When I saw her feet, they were a swelling shade of red all the way up to her ankles, as her soles bled on the rough concrete she was sleeping on.
As the days passed, we continued to rest within that little alleyway. Sis managed to find a cardboard box for us to call home, while I scrounged up some plastic bags from the garbage to fold into pillows. When it came to finding food, Sis usually went out on her own in the dead of night, and told me to stay put within our house of cardboard. Sometimes it only took her a few minutes to get something, while other times, it took her hours. When she returned, she either had a piece of half-eaten bread, or a bottled drink from a vending machine. But most of the time, she came out empty-handed, and we just fell asleep listening to the growls of our own stomachs.
When the sun rose back up, I could see the shadows of various adults as the walked pass our alley. A couple of them stood up straight, making them look like giants to me, as they had wore the finest of pure black suits that even shined in the sunlight, but those people were a rarity to see. For the most part, the people who passed our 'home' only wore ragged work clothes with crooked ties, and hung their heads down in sheer despair.
Since I was a curious kid, I wanted to see what those people were like, especially if they were willing to spare us some money or leftovers.
But when I was ready to place a single step into the sunlight, a hand grabbed me by the collar and instantly yanked me back.
"What're you doing Shoji!?" Sis asked me with a shout, revealing she was the one that yanked me back. "You know that we shouldn't go near any adults! What if they put us back in the place with those mean kids?"
"I-I know that Sis!" I replied with a frightened yelp before looking up at her, instead of cowering in one corner of the box like I usually did. "…But why can't we at least ask for some help? Or even just a little bit of food?"
The anger and irritation faded right off of Sis's face once I asked that. As her eyes widened and her lip began to tremble, her expression was soon filled with sheer dejection. Instead of telling me a direct answer, all she did was hug me tightly. In the process, I could hear a few muffled sobs coming from her mouth.
Once my eyes began to sting, I hugged her back in return. As I did so, I thought about the adults that continued to walk past our alleyway, and I realized an important detail. No matter how high and might, or low and miserable the adults looked, none of them peered within the alleyway, or our cardboard box, even if we were loud enough to be heard.
Months passed as Sis and I stayed in that alley, each one growing colder than the last. It wasn't long until the first snowfall came to the city, rendering our cardboard home into nothing more than a pile of mush. Thankfully, it wasn't too difficult to find more trash to form into a shelter, but the icy winds that blew in went right through the filthy rags that we had for clothes.
As the two of us were struggling to find the smallest bit of heat, I remember seeing constant streams of lights all over the city, including the occasional trees that were planted by the sidewalk. Various people continued to walk past the alleyway we were in, but they always came in pairs, and for some reason, they were constantly hugging and kissing one another. Sometimes, they even did so while they were walking.
…When I saw those couples strolling within a city of lights, a feeling of sheer sorrow bubbled up within me, making my eyes sting in the cold air. Especially when huddled back into the dark, dank, and freezing pile of garbage that my sister and I were living in.
After a while, I had grown accustomed to ignoring them, just like Sis usually did.
Until one day, where the street right outside of the alley was filled to the brim with people.
I hadn't seen such a big crowd before, and apparently, neither had Sis, since she was looking at it with just as much amazement as me.
Because of that, we both tiptoed our way through the alley, and peered our heads out to see what all of the commotion was about. Once we did, I could see some sort of pedestal set up in the middle of this mob, with a rather elderly and portly man standing behind it.
"My fellow citizens of Tatsumi Port Island," The man declared, with the giant speakers set up behind him carrying his voice across the wave of people. "As I'm sure you're aware, this last decade has been an utter catastrophe to both the economy, and your lives here in Iwatodai."
The people that Sis and I saw in the crowd were either nodding their heads, or lowering them down with a scowl in response. While Sis simply frowned as she heard what the big man said, I didn't know what to say or do. I mean, I wasn't even alive for a whole decade.
"I too, am deeply pained to see what has happened to our once proud and powerful country…" The man uttered as he clenched a fist, and a series of distressed wrinkles covered his face. "But fret not everyone, for the Kirijo Group will not stand to let this suffering continue!" He now shouted to the massive mob, making some of the people in it flinch back a bit. "That is why I stand here to declare the official beautification of not just Iwatodai, but all of Tatsumi Port Island!" The large man then raised his fist up high. "We shall rid ourselves of the filth that these lost years have given us, and return to our rightful place as one of the strongest and richest societies known to man!"
With that last statement, the entire crowd began cheering with sheer dynamism, making it sound like a festival was about to begin. As the cheering began to spread, Sis began to pull me back into the alleyway, and retreated to our home of garbage.
"Sis, what does beauti…beatifi…" The massive word kept twisting my tongue as I tried to ask her my question. "…what does it mean? Is it something good? It sounds an awful like beautiful after all." I smiled as I stated that.
Sis however, didn't answer right away, and only looked down at the concrete with a forlorn look in her eyes. Seeing that look in her eyes made my smile dissipate, and filled my tiny chest with worry.
"…Sis?" I took a hold of her arm, and shook it a little bit. "Is something wrong?"
Once she heard me, her eyes popped open in slight surprise, and she turned her view back at me. "Oh! I'm sorry Shoji…" She stated, her voice completely coated with an apologetic tone. I was about to ask her what was wrong again, until she placed a gentle hand on the top of my head. "But…yes, I'm sure it's something good." Sis said with a warm smile as she stroked my crimson hair. "But it won't happen overnight, so we have to be patient, okay?"
"Okay Sis!" I nodded happily as I had the biggest smile on my face, and then gave my sister a hug right around the torso. She was a bit taken aback at first, but soon hugged me right back. As I hugged her, I could feel warmth filling up my chest. At that moment, I wasn't sure what it was, but I found out later on.
It was hope.
A few days had passed since that event, and Sis was out on another stroll for food again. Like usual, I stayed back and waited in the alleyway, ready to wait there for at least a few hours. This time though, she returned as soon as she left, and the only thing she brought back was a distressed look on her face.
I was about to ask her what happened, but before I could, Sis placed her hand right over my mouth, and gave off a low 'shhh' right next to my ear. A couple seconds later, a human-shaped shadow crept into the alley, indicating that someone was out there. I couldn't see what the person looked like, but I understood exactly why Sis ran back here as quickly as she could.
Based on the person's shadow, they seemed to look around the alley from where they stood. After a while, I heard the crackle of a plastic bag, and the person walked away, with his shadow no longer occupying the alleyway.
Once they left, Sis took her hand off of my mouth, and took a cautious step out of the garbage we lived in to find a plastic bag sitting right outside the alley. It had the logo of a convenience printed on it, and it appeared to be full.
However, Sis left it alone, as if it was just another piece of litter on the sidewalk, and stepped back in, holding me close with a strong, but fearful grip.
We stayed right where we sat even as a truck slowly passed on the road we were close to. It appeared to be filled with fresh soil and the brightest of flowers. Soon enough, a dozen or so people in baggy clothes followed it, with each one of them carrying a trowel in a gloved hand. Overtime, I could hear the sound of the trowels digging through dry soil, while a low, masculine voice was leading them on what to do.
Hours had passed as they worked, with the sounds and voices growing more faint as time passed. Eventually, I couldn't hear them at all, and the shadow of the truck soon vanished out of sight.
Once it did, everything seemed to fall silent, and the alleyway was empty once again, with the exception of my sister and me. I couldn't tell if the silence was calming or disturbing, but I knew that it was something that I hadn't experienced, since I had lived most of my days listening to the constant rustling on the city.
When I began to wonder about this new experience, the silence was killed by the sound of footsteps, accompanied by the hum of a running car engine.
The sounds grew louder with each second, and before long, a new shadow found its way into our alley. This time, it seemed to belong to a slender young man. A large truck also seemed to come to a stop right behind him, and the man raised his hand up, holding a container of some sorts.
Without any hesitation, he threw the canister down the alleyway we were in, which soon made a loud clank, and a bizarre hissing sound. Sis reacted with a gasp, and practically slammed her hand over my mouth again. All the while, she held her own breath for as long as she could.
As the hissing continued, the entire alley filled up with a white smoke. I could hear several bodies from a ways away hit the ground with a soft slam as they fell, but not for long. My eyelids felt heavy already, and my head was even bopping back and forth a bit. Sis tried shaking my shoulder to keep me awake, but I soon felt her strength diminish as her grip weakened with each passing second. In mere seconds, her hands fell from both my shoulder and my mouth, and she collapsed right onto the concrete, right before my consciousness slipped away from me.
When my eyes finally opened up again, all I could see was a mattress, held above me by a metal grid. The first thing that hit me was all of the noise going on. Without even turning my head, I could hear the worried mumbles of other kids in…wherever the hell I am, accompanied by the faint, but still noticeable barks and howls coming through the wall, from the next room over.
"Shoji! Oh thank god!"
My eyes widened once I heard my sister's voice, riddled with relief. With a shake of my head to brush out the last of the cobwebs in there, I sit up and turn my head to the left, and see her standing by the bed I'm currently lying on.
Once I sat up though, my sister hugs me around the chest, and holds me close.
"You're okay! Thank goodness!" She said as she placed her chin right on my shoulder. "You have no idea how worried I was about what that gas might've done to you."
"S-Sis…" I muttered out with a slight stutter. I still wasn't entirely awake yet, so I wasn't sure what I should say to her at first. "…Where are we?"
As soon as I asked, my sister's arms suddenly lost all of the strength that they put into hugging me, and she broke the hug to simply stand by my bed again. "…I don't know…" Sis stated with all too much trepidation in her voice. She soon raised both of her arms up to embrace herself, as if she still felt in the freezing outside air cutting through her clothes.
When Sis hugged herself, that's when I noticed it. Behind her, there stood dozens of bunk beds, all lined up in a column, and made from nothing more than two mattresses and some metal. Around us were the countless kids that I heard earlier; they ranged from boys to girls, from little kids to early teens, but they all looked just a pitiable as Sis and I did from living off of the street.
As I saw all of the other kids either huddle to themselves on the beds, or wander around with the utmost confusion, my chest began to feel tight, as if my very ribcage was collapsing on my heart. It would take me several years to find out what that sensation truly was, so all I could do was let the feeling build inside me.
When I finally found out what that feeling was later in my life, it all made sense.
It was fear.
Betcha didn't expect a fic as dark and grim as this one from me while I'm also writing Light Camera Featherman, eh?
*brickd*
But yeah, this is essentially my own take on Sho's backstory, with some extra stuff added in. Prolly the biggest so far being that Sho appears to have an older sister. Don't worry though, she's not an OC, and if you haven't figured out who she is already, you will eventually~
Now then, that's all from me atm, hope you enjoy Sho's shitty childhood!
*brickd again*
Persona 3, 4, Ultimax (c) Atlus