"Is everything ready?" Willow asked.
"As ready as it'll ever be," Buffy replied, sighing. "I just can't believe it. I mean, one second I don't even know he has a kid, and the next it's like 'Hey, can my eighteen-year-old son with psychopathic tendencies come and live with you?' And of course, I have to be all like 'Sure, I would love to deal with my ex-boyfriend's kid who I didn't even know existed until about two minutes ago, even though there's a slight chance that he'll kill us all in our sleep!'"
"I'm sensing a bit of tension here."
"A bit? I mean, we don't even know this kid."
"Not to mention the whole creepy your ex-boyfriend has a son who's only a few years younger than you thing."
"Ick. I didn't even think of that. I was kinda focusing more on the vampires can't have kids so how does he even exist thing."
"And then there's Darla, who Angel killed, like poof, gone, coming back."
"And Angel sleeping with her. I mean, what was he thinking?"
"Oh yes, definitely tension-y."
"So," Xander said as he and Anya entered the living room, "I think we've Connor-proofed everything. Anything else you need me to do?"
"Connor-proofed?" Willow asked.
"We hid all the dangerous stuff that a sociopathic half-demon teenager might use to blow us all up," Anya explained.
"Thank you for that, sweetie," Xander said. "Because we weren't all stressed out enough without thinking about the kid potentially blowing us all up."
"Well, she asked. I was just being honest. And why are we taking care of him in the first place? I mean, Angel's his father. If he can't deal with Connor then it's not our problem."
"Try telling Buffy that," Dawn muttered from beside the stairs.
"I just did," Anya replied. "I said it, and she's right there."
"You know what I meant."
"Actually, I don't. And it would be nice if you didn't just assume that I understand what you're talking about."
"Ahn," Xander began.
"Don't you 'Ahn' me, I'm tired of everyone expecting me to understand everything!"
"Well you have been human for a couple of years," Willow pointed out. "Maybe you could try picking up on how we do things, instead of bugging everyone to death with your rude commentary and stupid questions."
With that, Anya and Willow began shouting at each other while Xander tried to pull them apart and Dawn tried to defend Willow.
"Everybody shut up!" Buffy shouted over the noise. The others quieted immediately. "Look, I've already said yes to Angel, and Connor is already on his way here. He will arrive here tomorrow morning and find us ready to welcome him here. Any questions?" No dared say a word. "Good. Now then, I'm going out on patrol. Anyone want to come?"