author's notes: so im attempting my first multi-chaptered big time rush fic. it's gonna have hints of angst in it but all around it shouldn't be too bad. now, this is only my second time venturing into the btr fic world. i read it as much as i can and i've got a one-shot (go check it out on my page!) but multi-chaptered is new (in this fandom at least). so please, leave reviews and tell me what you think and give CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM (if i see on flame i will probably block you, sorry). i love reviews. having a story favorited or being favorited as an author is awesome and all but reviews are really what count the most. i want to know what you all have to say. if this gets a good response then i'll continue with it.
so please, enjoy, leave good feedback, and i hope you like it :)
disclaimer: big time rush does not belong to me. if they did would i be writing fic? heck no.
Chapter One
He's six and staring out the window at the falling snowflakes. They're so pretty and white, and the ground is so shiny when the sun is out. He loves winter. Winter means Christmas, snowmen, and hot chocolate. Winter means playing in the snow with his three best friends until their faces are pink and they can't feel their fingers. Winter means snuggling under the blankets while momma reads a book until he falls asleep.
He sighs. The others are supposed to be on their way but so far he hasn't seen them coming up the walkway. He looks at the clock over the fireplace; he can't tell time yet but he knows that the big hand is way past where it usually is when his friends get here.
"Logan?"
Logan spins around to see his momma standing there with a tray of hot chocolate. "Momma, they're late," he whines. He trudges over to her, pout on his face, his big brown eyes sad. He hugs her leg and she laughs, bumping her hip lightly against his cheek.
"They're on thei-" She's interrupted by the front door bursting open and loud chatter filling the room. Logan squeals in delight and runs off to greet his friends.
They all smile at him as Mrs. Knight helps them with their winter gear. James is the first to wave, then Kendall with his big grin, and then Carlos, helmet already strapped onto his head, bounds over to him and hugs him. Logan hurries them into the other room where hot chocolate and a movie are waiting.
He stops. He's only six but he knows that these guys will be his best friends for forever and ever. A grin lights up his face at the thought.
Forever and ever.
Minnesota is freezing. But with Christmas just around the corner that's to be expected. Logan rubs his hands together to keep them warm while surveying the crowded airport. They should be coming through the gate any moment now-
"Logan, over here!"
Logan grins as he sees Kendall waving, Carlos right behind him. They've got their carry-ons in their hands, matching smiles on their faces. Logan bounces on the spot, willing them to get through the crowd at a faster pace. He's been waiting for this for a week now and it's finally here.
When they finally get to Logan, Logan greets each of them with a quick hug. Carlos, already chattering away, leads the way to the baggage claim. Logan can't help but laugh; it's just the same as it always has been.
One person is missing, though.
He pushes the nagging thought away and focuses on helping Kendall and Carlos get their suitcases. It doesn't take long for them to be on their way, heading to the parking garage across the street. Carlos keeps talking about random things, laughing and bouncing on his feet the entire walk to Logan's car.
Logan sighs. It feels good to have two of his best friends here.
Even if he's missing.
"So, Lo-gain, tell us," Carlos starts as he flops down on Logan's couch, "how have you been?"
Logan shoves Carlos' feet off the coffee table and sits next to his friend, shrugging. "Same old, same old," he answers. Carlos squints in disbelief. Then he just sighs and shakes his head. "What?"
"Logan, you-"
"Carlos!" Kendall shouts. "Come help me!" Carlos rolls his eyes but gets up anyway.
Logan is silently grateful for the interruption. He leans back against the couch and closes his eyes. It's not that he's afraid to talk about him with Carlos or Kendall; it's just that he doesn't want to. Ever since the incident that broke the band up Logan has avoided any mention of his former friend like the plague. Words can bring up so many painful memories, memories he doesn't want to have nor does he want to dwell on.
After everything they have all been through together, Logan still thinks all that's happened is his fault. He won't admit it to anyone other than himself. That he's afraid of. If he admits that it was all his doing, that it's his fault James left, then he'll lose everyone. Most of all he's afraid of what Kendall and Carlos would think if they found out.
But they won't be finding out.
A loud banging breaks Logan out of his thoughts followed by Carlos letting out a steady stream of colorful language. It makes him laugh. There's another bang so Logan forces himself off the couch and into the kitchen.
"Logan," Carlos squeaks. Logan takes in the sight of Kendall on the floor, groaning, a carton of eggs next to him, most of them broken all over the floor and his friend. Carlos smiles innocently.
"You two have been here for maybe twenty minutes and you've already managed to mess up my kitchen and potentially injure Kendall?" Logan sighs. "I need new friends."
The grin that lights up Carlos' face makes Logan think otherwise. He's been saying that for years, ever since they were old enough to know better, but he knows he would never need anyone better than the friends he has now.
"Yes….?" Carlos shrugs, the innocent smile slipping from his face as he grabs Kendall's outstretched hand and helps him to his feet.
Logan laughs. "And what were you doing with the eggs anyway?" He crosses his arms over his chest, leaning on his hip against the doorway.
Kendall brushes himself off before answering in a matter-of-fact way, "We were gonna make brunch." He smiles, then, and claps his hands together. "Carlitos, we need to go get more eggs don't ya think?" Logan notices the not-so-subtle way Kendall's eyes bug out and immediately knows something is up.
Carlos looks confused for a moment before his eyes light up. "Yes! We do." Logan raises an eyebrow in curiosity. They both head for the doorway Logan is standing in but Logan stands upright and blocks it with his body.
"What's going on you two?" He tries to look stern but know it's probably failing; he never was the leader of the group.
The two of them share a glance. Then, before Logan can protest, he's being picked up under the armpits and carried into the living room. Kendall and Carlos drop him onto the couch then they're both running for the door.
"We," Carlos points between himself and Kendall, "will be back soon with some groceries. You," Carlos points to Logan with a grin, "stay there and don't leave this house. Got it?" Before Logan can answer Carlos is following Kendall out the front door, slamming it closed behind him.
Confused, he just sits there and stares at the door for a moment, wondering what the hell just happened. His friends don't make a lot of sense most of the time and that usually translates into we're-up-to-no-good. He shakes his head but there's still a slight smile on his face.
He really needs new friends.
Soon turns into three hours. And after three hours Kendall and Carlos still aren't back. Logan is beginning to worry. The snow started falling soon after they left and hasn't stopped since. He glances out the window, a frown crossing his face: the ground is covered and already piling high.
Logan sighs and lets the curtain fall closed. He takes cell phone out to call them both but it starts vibrating before he can do so. Carlos's name flashes across the screen.
"Carlos, where are you two?"
There's static on the other end of the line. Logan can barely make out what Carlos is saying but he hears "snowed in" and "grocery" so he assumes they are snowed in at the grocery store. The line goes dead after a moment or two. Logan curses and shoves the phone back in his pocket. He starts to pace. They all have dealt with a lot of snow during their years living in Minnesota but none of them have ever been snowed in.
Just as he's about to try and all Carlos back there's a frantic knock at the door. Frowning, Logan hurries over, wondering who would get out in a crazy storm like this. He takes a look through the peep hole only to be met with the back of someone's head.
He's ready to tell this person they're insane for even being out in this weather. But once the door is open he can't form a coherent thought, much less speak. He freezes while the snow swirls inside and the wind bites at his exposed skin, though he doesn't really care.
"James?"