Chapter 1 – The Tragedy of Sans

I woke up in bed abruptly, a sense of vertigo pounding on my skull and an odd sense of deja-vu. Gasping, my hand moved to phantom pains burning on my ribs. Sweat began to bead on my skull as I desperately tried to get my breathing under control. "it was another one of those was it…" I groaned, rolling over in bed. I could do with five more minutes of sleep before Papyrus came to wake me up. I must have had another nightmare but all that remained from whatever I had been dreaming about was a profound feeling of loss and resignation, along with flashes of memories that felt just out of reach. I considered this, glancing briefly under the sheets at my ribs. "SANS? I MADE YOU SPAGHETTI, BROTHER!" I heard Papyrus knock on the door before the door swung open without an answer.

Of course I wouldn't be so lucky. "morning, pap." I greeted, sitting up in bed just a little too quickly, sweat beading on my skull. "ARE YOU OKAY, BROTHER? YOU LOOK RATHER SWEATY FOR THIS TIME IN THE MORNING." Papyrus remarked, inviting himself in while shooting a disgusted glance at a sock he had nearly tripped over. "oh, you know me bro, i'm just a lazyBONES at this time in the morning." Laughing nervously, I turned my best disarming smile on Papyrus. "UGH, SANS! THIS IS NO TIME TO BE BOONDOGGLING IN BED, SANS! YOU HAVE TO GET TO WORK!" He grimaced at the pun to which I widened my smile. There was nothing quite like Papyrus' expression after a terrible pun.

"work, huh?" The idea that Papyrus thought I would do any work was amusing. Perhaps another nap would- "THAT'S RIGHT SANS! WE HAVE TO WATCH FOR HUMANS! TODAY MIGHT FINALLY BE THE DAY I JOIN THE ROYAL GUARD!" Papyrus crushed my dreams, overflowing with enthusiasm. The human..? For some reason the idea was familiar to me. Meanwhile, Papyrus chattered on happily in the background about his ambitions and dreams upon capturing a human, striking a heroic pose. My brother was so cool. "you're right, bro. i'll be down in a sec." I told him, swinging my legs over the side of the bed and pulling on my slippers. Something was strange and I couldn't quite put a finger on it at the time. It left me with a hanging sense of unease.

Papyrus almost seemed surprise d that I would consent to getting up, his eyes bugging out comically. "YOU'D BETTER BE, OR I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL SUBJECT YOU TO THE ULTIMATE IN WAKE-UP RITUALS!" He declared, shaking off his surprise and dashing out the door with a 'Nyeh heh heh.' I quickly pulled on my jacket before taking a shortcut into my lab behind the house. I could always nap later.

The lab was as unkempt as ever, the shifting air of my sudden appearance sending dust into the air. Trying not to consider where exactly the dust originated from, I turned on the fluorescent lighting, wincing at the sudden brightness.

Next, I pulled open a nearby drawer made of an odd metal marked with odd symbols that seemed familiar but at the same time I was certain I'd never seen them before. But what I did know was that the metal in the lab was safe from timeline alteration, meaning that anything that was put in wouldn't be removed if something were to occur in the timeline… such as a reset. Though I couldn't explain why I knew this, or how it came to be this way. In fact, I didn't even remember where the metal came from. It simply was. Perhaps its presence was the result of other timeline interference, but for that same reason it would be near impossible to determine.

The point still stood, if there were any answers to be had about what was going on they would be kept inside the metal drawers. In fact, I knew there would be answers. Quickly I opened the nearest drawer and pulled out a journal, the cover screaming in boldface: "READ ME".

"well… let's see what the other sans-es left for me today." I sighed, pulling the cover open. That's right; the human was going to fall into the Underground today…

…I could just barely see myself in what must have been another timeline shaking the human's hand outside of Snowdin when I closed my eyes. A smile lit up the kid's face, their eyes sparkling at the sound produced by a whoopee cushion in the palm of my hand. "i'm sans. sans the skeleton." i introduced, shaking their hand.

But as soon as the memory had returned, it was gone. My journal went on to explain that the first time the human…Frisk… came, they broke the barrier down and saved us all. They befriended everybody… went on a date with Papyrus, cooked with Undyne, ate out with me, and even saved Alphys from herself. We saw the sun for the first time, and the human was going to be our ambassador. Or so we thought...

A striking memory that surfaced was the dawn's rays as the sun passed over the horizon at the top of Mount Ebott. Together we stood, side by side with wonderment in the air at the sight. It would be our first memory together on the surface. "SANS? WHAT'S THAT?" Papyrus asked suddenly, breaking the peaceful silence as abruptly as it had occurred. "clearly it's the SANS-set. can't you see my face in it?" I joked, smiling up at my brother. "OH, OKAY. WAIT NO! THAT CAN'T BE TRUE! SANS, ARE YOU PRANKING ME AGAIN?" He shouted, realizing I had tricked him. Toriel, who had been muffling her giggles with her paws, abruptly burst out in unladylike guffaws. The others soon joined in, the atmosphere turning warm and accepting… but something seemed out of place and nagged at me as I watched Papyrus run into the distance, determined to make a good impression on the humans.

Slowly the others made their way out towards the surface in kind. All that remained was myself, the human,and Toriel. "Come, child. Let's go home." Toriel took the human's hand, gently pulling them along. I watched as they passed, the kid avoiding my searching gaze. "something wrong, kid?" I asked. Though I could never know what they had experienced in their nightmare, I could still tell that the human was hiding something. They shook their head, back turned to me. "Oh, if you have somewhere else to go you can tell me, child! I promise I'd understand." Toriel made an assumption about their concern. They shook their head again, before looking up at Toriel. "Wonderful! I'm so glad, child. Let's get home, I'll make you some butterscotch-cinnamon pie for dinner." She explained, the joy almost physically visible from her as she pulled the human to her side, walking off into the distance.

But something still nagged at me, so I decided to take a shortcut to the Underground, writing what had happened in an old journal that had been lying around my lab. I carefully tucked it into one of the drawers with a sigh. I had desperately hoped that the human hadn't been planning what I thought they were. After all, they had everything: a family, friends, food, shelter, bad jokes (thanks to me, clearly. I am the BONELY pun master of the Underground). What more could they want? The future held nothing but hope for both monster and humankind.

…we didn't make it past the first night before the reset happened. That vertigo I experienced earlier this morning I could associate with the beginning of a new timeline after a reset… I had felt that before, I recalled. It was the human's determination allowed them to stop and start, save and reload, or even reset at their whim causing this. The idea caused a deeply rooted anger to flare. I shook my head resignedly, turning the page.

This story played out for multiple timelines, (I had placed a tally at the side of the page numbering about 10), and each time a reset occurred shortly after reaching the surface. There were numerous crossed out bullet points on the page; it was clear that I had tried in other timelines to figure out exactly what the human wanted. Why would they save us over and over again just to start over each time? What was it they were missing? I even had notes in which I confronted them before the end, asking them what it was they wanted. They never answered me. And if I had thought I was suffering then, watching the human befriend every monster they met over and over, I never had known what would come next. I gasped, clutching my skull at the flood of terrible memories.

…That was when everything changed. There was a timeline I had scrawled down, as if in a rush. 'They're all dead. Paps…,'

I nearly sobbed out loud at the memory of holding Papyrus' dusty scarf, desperately trying to scoop up his remains before collapsing in a fit of grief. "PAPYRUS!" I wailed, clutching the scarf to my chest as if it were my only anchor on the world. I felt like screaming, screaming at the world that dared to continue onwards without my brother. But as soon as the grief had come, the anger quickly replaced it. "Pap… I'll avenge you. Just give me some time to figure out what's going on." I clenched a fist in front of me, the hum of my magic threatening to lash out at anything nearby. The trees shook, the wind howled…even clumps of snow had begun to rise around me. "That human is going to have a really, really, REALLY bad time." Growling, I tossed the scarf around my neck and stomped off toward my lab.

'…Undyne was the next to die. Meanwhile Alphys desperately attempted to evacuate those that she could with little success… the human is going for the king now. I've stood by and watched too long. My readings showed timelines shifting, stopping and starting again before they all ended abruptly… the time they are going to end is after the human reaches Asgore. Knowing what comes next, I can't afford not to care. I'm going to confront the human. It's time to get revenge for my brother. Maybe I can kill them enough times for them to give up… but with their determination, I doubt it. Maybe there is a glimmer of the human… Frisk… I once called a friend left inside the kid.' The entry cut off there, but it was still clear what happened next. A hand unconsciously went to my ribs.

I felt the knife as it sliced diagonally through my ribs, a warm red liquid quickly spilling from the gap. But I wouldn't give that demon the satisfaction of a reaction. Putting on the best smile I could manage, I rose my gaze to meet the human's hatred filled one. "heh. guess that's it, huh?" I laughed, reaching an arm across my torso to hold my wound together as the human watched apathetically. "well. don't say i didn't warn you." I shrugged, getting to my feet as best I could. "welp. i'm going to grillby's." Using the last of my magic, I created a shortcut to Snowdin before taking unsteady steps toward it.

Before taking the last step, I caught one last glance at the demonic smile that had spread across the kid's face, their red eyes glowing almost euphorically at my suffering. They would never know that my suffering had no beginning or end, it was a constant that would never vanish until this timeline crap finally stopped and I could be certain my brother was safe. Unfortunately in this timeline, he never would be.

I felt the world spin as I landed unceremoniously in a clump of snow outside of Grillby's. With what little strength I had left, I reached out with one arm and pulled myself towards it, a red trail left in the snow behind me. But I wouldn't make it there. "Papyrus, do you want anything?" I asked, reaching out with my reddened hand toward the door that was so close but so far. I finally collapsed, the only feeling remaining was a cold emptiness as my body turned to dust in the shadow of the bar I had one called a second home. My last thoughts were of Papyrus and how I never got to tell him how much I loved him before he died.

…and as suddenly as it had happened, I was alive again in bed in Snowdin. I hadn't known what happened, but when Papyrus had walked through my door that morning, I had launched myself at him, clutching to his torso and sobbing. "papyrus! you're alright. thank god. thank you so much…" I gasped between sobs, my brother's comforting presence chasing away the night terror I had last night. After all, it was only a dream right?

With shaking hands, I reluctantly turned the page. A chill ran down my spine at the sight that awaited me: Papyrus' dust covered scarf. "pap…?" I whispered, clutching the scarf closer. The fact that I had failed my brother in at least one other timeline was solidified just by this one article, and I could see why the other Sans-es struggled. It was hard to care knowing that my best effort would never be enough. Their grief…depression…even their apathy… I could feel it all as if I experienced it myself; which in a way I had. The weight squeezed my soul, the one thing that didn't weather the timelines unscathed under the reset's touch. It felt like I had lived many of lifetimes with all of the bumps and scrapes along the way and sadly it was the truth. Hesitantly I continued to read the small entries that dotted the page. 'The human beat me to Papyrus again. He's...dead. Papyrus… I'm so sorry. I wish I could be the brother you deserve. That human… is going to have a really, really bad time.'

A red substance forebodingly surrounded the next entry... which was written in the same substance. 'kid is Chara… frisk is gone.'

It must have been the third time we had gone through a timeline like this, I noted as I glanced down at the diagonal cut in my torso. I must've been delirious, but I had a burning question I needed answered. I glanced at the human who looked down on me as apathetic as ever. "what happened to frisk?" I asked the human, expecting no answer as they often remained mute aside from the odd sound. "Frisk? You mean this Frisk?" The kid grinned, their countenance suddenly shifting from a red-eyed demon to a brown eyed child. "Sans… I'm so sorry. I made a mistake… I know you can never forgive me but I'm so sorry!" The kid sobbed as I watched on in confusion. I mean, I knew I was dying but I never expected to go this crazy in my final moments.

And just as suddenly as it had happened, it was gone; the red eyed human grinned on sadistically at me. "My name is Chara. Frisk's soul is mine, and now I'm free to kill you again, and again, and again, and again…!" The demon child wailed with laughter as if it were the funniest thing they had ever heard. No sooner than the words had left their mouth, I had dove into a shortcut to my lab in Snowdin as fast as I could. Agonizingly I pulled myself over to my workstation, fishing the journal out of the drawer. It fell in front of me unceremoniously and I winced as my vision blurred, flipping pages to the page with my entries from the other timelines. It hit me then that I hadn't managed to get a pen or pencil to write the new entry in. Dipping my index finger in my wound, I shakily began to write out what would be my last words. With a last bit of energy, I used my magic to return the journal to the drawer before the world spun and I turned to dust once again.

I shivered unconsciously at the memory, realizing where the dust on the floor of my lab had come from. Flipping the pages quickly, I skimmed through with new-found desperation for a happier ending to the tragic story that continued to play out again and again.

'The kid killed Papyrus with his arms open for a hug. He believed in them. He even told them so as his severed head fell into the snow and his body turned to dust. I was too late again. With shaking hands I scooped up Papyrus' dust… or I tried. Grief has its way of making even the simplest of tasks impossible. I couldn't even sprinkle Papyrus' dust on his favourite things, and I highly doubt I'm one of them now. I didn't protect him. I really am the worst brother.' My curiosity from the previous entry vanished, along with any sympathy I may have held. Regardless of whatever the previous entry may have meant, it was clear that this human was not and would never be worth saving. After all, even if Chara and Frisk were different humans; Frisk still forced me to repeat the same series of days over albeit with a more seemingly innocent intent. The far reaching consequences of their actions still lived on in my memory.

'I tried a different approach this time. I told Papyrus that the human was dangerous and that they would kill him if they got the chance. That they had no mercy in their heart, and they were covered from head to toe in monster dust. At first, it seemed like he took my warning to heart. But then later I caught him as he was leaving the house. He told me that he couldn't just stand by as all of the other monsters died. He said that every person could be a good person, that he believed the human just needed someone to guide them. He declared that he would be the monster for the job and walked out. I didn't stop him. The human killed him again. Pap… he was definitely a better monster than I was. After all, I just locked myself in my room and cried while the human stormed the Underground. He at least tried to confront them before it was too late.' Unfortunately; that situation seemed very plausible knowing Papyrus like I did. The returned memory of my brother not believing me stung.

'This time I just stood by and watched as the human killed Papyrus. What could I do, anyway? If I interfered, the human would just load and come back. If we're all doomed to die, who am I to stop it? It's really hard to give it my all anymore. After all, I know it's just going to happen all over again. The most precious person in my life will be taken from me over and over again, the grief as fresh as the first time every single time. If he's destined to die, why should I go on?' If I could grimace with my never-changing smile, I would've after reading this entry. I would always go on if there were a chance I could save Papyrus. My brother was my entire reason for being, seeing his simple joy was the light of my day. Well, that and his face when I told a RIB-tickling pun.

'I… we can't do this anymore. There has to be something we've overlooked. Some way I can save my brother. I tried to confront the human at the bridge this time. I asked them why they were doing this. Soulless eyes stared back at me, and a chilling grin lit up their face. They didn't answer me in words, but their expression told me everything. There was no conscious in this human. It was a real monster. I tried pleading, that if they tried they would find out how friendly the monsters could be; that if they tried the puzzles they would be fun. They simply laughed at me, turning on their heel and walking down the bridge. I called after them 'I swear, if you kill my brother, you're going to have a bad time.' They killed Papyrus. And it wasn't a clean death this time. I could hear him scream from my post, but by the time I got there, all that was left was Papyrus' dust covered scarf. I tied it around my neck and followed the human into Waterfall. This can't go on. Papyrus confronts the human on the road towards Waterfall, Snowdin side. But if you're reading this, me, you probably already know. It always was odd to me how I could retain and spark memories from other timelines. Maybe this is our vice, how we can save Papyrus. After all, doesn't time work both ways?'

That was the final entry. It was all coming back to me; the memories were as if I had experienced them myself. Now I was pissed. I made a fist, and I could feel my magic hum with my rage. That human was going to have a bad time. But maybe I was right, time did work both ways.