Okay; this is sort of half-baked story, I don't know where it's going so it's going to be totally swayed by you the reviewers. Tell me what you want to see, I'll give it to you.

Summery: Hogwarts is disbanded for a year and Harry hosts three wizard students at Stonewall High in Little Whinging. Who comes over isn't who he expected and the year doesn't go as he hopes. How do you get wizards to act like muggles?

Pairings: Slash- DM/HP, BZ/many people, RW/OC

STORY:

Dear Mr. Potter,

We are very sorry to inform you that Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has been disbanded for the year. Because of serious danger issues posed to the faculty and students this year we have decided to send the students to non-magic school. Mr. Potter you have been chosen to host three wizarding students in your home to which additional rooms will be magically added. Protection and transportation to Stonewall High where you and your three piers will be attending as Juniors this year has also been provided. A faculty member from Hogwarts School will also be placed in your new school for protection and assistance. Since you will be missing a year of magical education you will return for an extra year. However, we ask that you still take your year seriously and invest in this alternative education. The other students will be arriving 19 July at noon. You are responsible for your piers and their well being. Thank-you for your compliance and cooperation.

Deputy Head-Mistress

Minerva McGonagall

Harry sat there, stunned, the letter in his hands continued to say the same thing. The words remained the same no matter how many times he read it. The 19th was tomorrow and his relatives would not be happy at all. What's more, Harry had no idea who was coming. It could be first years or Slytherins or seventh years or nerdy Ravenclaws he didn't know.

There were so many things that could go wrong.

So he stood and left his room, he turned to see a strange new door at the end of the hall. A sign on it read "Hogwarts Student Quarters" and it was made of black wood with the crest imprinted and a silver handle with four key holes. One of which had a key hanging from it and a small note attached. Harry walked over and read the note. "Mr. Potter's key to the Student Quarters. Room within, number 2", the attached tassel was red with a lion and a large H on it. Harry frowned and twisted the key in the lock, it clicked and the door opened to a small hall with three doors on either side. The first two on either side had a number and the last ones had words. One with "Wash Room" and the other with "Library and Study". The door to number 2 had a lock as well, which Harry rightly assumed matched the lock his key was in (the second one on the row).

His room looked just like his at Hogwarts except meant for one person. It was a deal larger than his room down the hall and very cozy with a fire and his trunk inside. A small bell marked "house-elf" sat on his bedside table with a packet of instructions and forms to be signed. Standing up Harry read through the packet once and took the forms. He left his room, locking the door behind him as well as the entrance, and walked down stairs to the kitchen where the Dursely's sat eating and reading the morning paper.

"What is it boy?" Vernon asked without so much as looking up.

Vernon Dursley was a large man with a thin mustache and almost no neck, yet that which he had was hidden beneath his girth. He was easy to anger and had small beady eyes like his son Dudley's. Dudley was now a deal lighter than before but only because of a crash diet he had been on, though he was still very large and very cruel to his cousin. Vernon's wife, Petunia, Harry's aunt, was a very skinny woman with a long neck used to crane over hedges and spy on neighbors. She was a horse faced woman with thin lips and short hair.

"My school got disbanded for the year," Harry said, he waited as Vernon's eyes widened to a horrified size before he continued. "They're sending three students here to live with us and go to Stonewall High with me."

"What!" Harry's uncle bellowed, standing up angrily. Dudley looked outraged while Petunia was silent in shock.

"Here," Harry held out the letter for his uncle.

It offered a convenient amount of money in exchange for his allowing them to stay for the year. Dursley read the letter over and put a hand to his chin and stroked for a moment in thought.

"Very well, they can stay. But they have to be quiet and cooperative and no freakish business, you understand?"

"Yes sir," Harry nodded. He turned to leave when, instead, there was a knock on the door.

"Go get it boy," Vernon waved him off and sat again to finish the paper. Harry walked down the hall and opened the door to see Snape standing on the porch looking very out of place and very out of character. He looked extremely muggle to be exact. He wore a pair of faded black jeans, a black shirt under a black trench-coat and black boots. Harry's eyes opened wide at the sight of his evil potions professor standing there in muggle attire with a black Porsche in the drive-way.

"P-P-Professor Snape?"

"Yes Potter, I'm the faculty member assigned to watch over you, and don't even comment on the clothes," Snape stepped inside and removed his jacket. For the first time, Harry saw some expanse of Snape's skin and it wasn't as yellow as it appeared in the dungeon light. Snape breathed and handed Harry's the coat, pure leather, and waited.

"Uhm, my relatives are in the kitchen eating breakfast. If you don't mind me asking...Why are you here?"

"There was an attack yesterday and we had to remove our students earlier than we thought. Your piers will be arriving in a matter of moments. I came to inform you and your relatives," Snape answered.

Harry shut the door and they walked down the hall into the kitchen.

"Uncle Vernon, Professor Snape is here," Harry walked in and stepped aside allowing for his semi-gothic but still very intimidating professor to enter. Vernon gulped audibly and watched the man move in.

"I am Severus Snape, the teacher sent to watch over your nephew and his school-mates this year. I'm here because a small incident forced us to relocate our students early and they'll be here very soon. Now,-"Snape was cut off by the sound of an eager knocking at the door; Harry left and opened it wide to reveal Ron standing there with a giant grin on his face.

Ron and Harry hugged and pulled Ron's trunk inside and went down the hall just as Snape was finishing explaining something. Vernon nodded compliantly and Petunia mirrored the action. Snape turned and nearly groaned at the sight; of course they'd send the Golden Boy his best friend. Any minute the know-it-all would appear and he'd be stuck with them and some hapless, random 12-year-old for the year. Dudley looked dead afraid of the boy with red-hair as he remembered his brothers. After a moment of quiet another knock, this one lazy and almost tired sounding.

Harry and Ron went down the hall and answered to see a Sixth Year Slytherin standing there. Blaise Zabini, with his long brown hair and large hazel eyes, looked utterly bored with the idea of going undercover as a muggle-student. He was in a pair of black pants with patches and rips as well as a shirt under a leather jacket and leather boots with metal buckles.

"Potter and Weasel? Goody, now the beaver will show and my year will be hell," Zabini looked disgusted as he dragged in his pair of trunks and stood up straight.

Snape saw the Slytherin and silently thanked Dumbledore for the boy; he was no Draco Malfoy, but he was clever, quick and pureblood Slytherin.

"Mr. Zabini, good to see you."

"Snape? At least they'll be-" he was cut of by a knock with the distinction of someone who believed they should never be made to knock on a door.

Harry opened it to see four trunks surrounding non other than Draco Malfoy who looked utterly put-out. Malfoy saw Harry and, apparently with great self-control, gave him a tight smile.

"Hello Potter, pleasant to see you," Malfoy's words were as forced as a baby during labor.

"Malfoy," Harry nodded in confusion. The Slytherin stepped in and his bags grew legs and followed him in, sitting down with the others there. Snape and Blaise both grinned at him, as much as Snape could grin that is.

"They removed me from my week in Aspen Blaise, can you believe it?" That was why Malfoy looked so upset, his vacation was interrupted.

"Oh, that's a wretch Draco, how was the time you got there?" The blonde perked up and walked to his fellow snake.

"Well, we went skiing and of course had to find the sauna after that, right? So while we were in there, Narcissa and I had martinis and we heard all the gossip from the ladies who were staying there with us. It turns out that Baron CeVuar de Sexua is getting married to some half-veela woman from Finland. Of course that sent mum into a complete tizzy since she fancied him for years while he thought himself gay," Malfoy and Blaise twined arms and both seemed rather interested in the story. Harry and Ron exchanged surprised and amused looks at the portion of Malfoy's story.

"Is Malfoy a poof or what?" Ron asked in a quiet voice. Harry stifled a laugh and the five people walked down the hall into the kitchen as Malfoy told the story of getting massages, facials, and manicures in Aspen as well as going to clubs and getting smashing drunk. In the kitchen Malfoy stopped and raised his eyebrows at the three muggles.

Dudley looked shocked to see such a person in the kitchen and his parents were very much the same. This boy, obviously raised to power and wealth, gorgeous and educated, was standing in their kitchen, in their presence and what's more, he was a wizard. Harry could see that Malfoy shattered their stereo-type or all wizards being dirt-poor ruffians without class or sophistication.

Malfoy, on the other hand, looked as if every superstition about muggles and every rumor and opinion he'd ever had of them was confirmed. Funny looking Neanderthal freaks who had no business sharing a room or planet with him.

"Who are all of you?" Petunia asked pleasantly.

"I'm Ron, you've met me before," Ron offered, trying to make the others more comfortable.

"We know," Vernon said in a bit of a growl.

"My name is Blaise Zabini," the brown haired snake said, giving them a strange look.

"Of Zabini International?" Vernon asked with interest.

"My uncle is co-founder and CEO, yes," Blaise answered.

"I do business with them, they deal in oil and mining after all, you need drills for oil and mining of course," Vernon put in proudly.

"I see," Blaise commented; he seemed almost scared he would be attacked.

"And you are?" Petunia seemed eager to meet the blonde.

"Draco Malfoy." He said as if his very name was god's gift to mankind.

"How pleasant to make your acquaintance." Petunia smiled sweetly at him, batting her eyelashes.

Snape noted this and placed a hand on his charge's shoulder. Malfoy turned his head to look at the elder man. Blaise and Malfoy still had their arms hooked together and Harry was still carrying Snape's coat. Ron was grinning at the prospect of getting to live with Harry again this year.

"I have a list of things for you boys, come, let's go to your quarters," Snape said, steering the Slytherins out towards the stairs.

The students followed him up to the door where Snape opened the door and led them inside.

"Wait, I locked the door when I left earlier," Harry said, looking between Snape and the door.

"Doesn't matter if I'm the one coming in, otherwise it's perfectly effective."

"Oh," Harry nodded, still confused.

Snape walked to the end of the hall and they entered the study room, which closely resembled a common room with books surrounding them. Blaise and Malfoy seated themselves on one couch while Ron and Harry sat on another and Snape sat in one of the chairs.

"Here is the list of both requirements and suggestions for things to do this summer and school year," Snape pulled out a single page of paper and set it on the table.

"So, by June we have to do all the required things on there?"

"Yes, by June. Anything happens or you have questions I am going to be around, and you can contact me with the fire." There was a slight lull in conversation then before Snape stood.

"I'm going to settle into my quarters, and don't worry Mr. Weasely, they're not here."

Malfoy and Blaise waved cheerily at him as he disappeared through the door leaving the four there. Harry looked between the three wizards, wondering what a disaster this year would be. After a moment of silence the list started to glow, offering itself to them. Harry reached out and picked it up.

"Requirement ONE: Get to know your group by asking POLITE and INOFFENSIVE questions. Please be aware that this is a monitored activity as are all those marked Requirements"

Harry sighed, and set the page down, the others looked as skeptical as he felt.

"I'll start," Ron offered, trying to help his friend.

This is going to go really badly. Harry thought, looking at the Slytherins.